Unexpecting (Unexpecting #1)

19. Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

“In close circles, it often appears as if women of a child-bearing age coincide their pregnancies with each other, which is enjoyable for both the mothers and the children since an attachment is easily forged under such common circumstances.”

A Young Woman’s Guide to the Joy of Impending Motherhood

Dr. Francine Pascal (1941)

T his put a whole new spin on things.

Not the whole Cooper-used-to-be-in-love-with-me, although that did come as quite the surprise. How did I not know about it? Maybe I’m not the most observant person—I was in love with a gay man for years, having no clue he was gay. I guess that says a lot about me and my powers of observation. I have to admit I did feel a twinge of regret when Cooper admitted he had been in love with me, but it only lasted a moment. Now what I mainly feel is relief. Cooper-and-I was never meant to be, and I’m glad he’s no longer in love with me and even happier that his unrequited love didn’t affect our friendship. That would have been horrible if he had stopped being my friend, especially if I hadn’t had any idea of his true feelings.

But I have to stop thinking about what Cooper said or felt or still feels about me, because that is distracting me from the bigger problem. Regardless of Cooper’s opinion of the whole thing, I can’t stop thinking about the idea of David and I having a baby together .

And thinking about having a baby with him does sort of take my mind off the whole David-is-gay thing.

So what should I do? Despite what Cooper said, it does seem like a no-brainer to me. I want to have a baby. I don’t have a man in my life. David wants a baby. He doesn’t have a woman—or a man—in his life. Gay or not, I think I would love to keep him in my life. Seems pretty simple to me.

The only thing, the one little thing that holds me back from running straight to David (David, straight, ha-ha, Casey, good one!) is me. Me and my feelings. I know I’m still hung up on David. I’m not sure if I’ve been that way for a while (I suspect I have, and everything came to a head once I saw him again), or if it’s just seeing him again that makes everything seem so intense. In any event, David seems to be a little too entrenched in my heart right now, and I’m not sure that’s a good idea if I’m going to have a baby with him.

Does that make sense? That I like him too much to have a baby with him?

For now, though, I stick that thought in the don’t-want-to-deal-with folder. I decide to wait until I have my period. When that comes, it will mean decision time. I’ll have roughly about two weeks to get everything together—decide if David is it, and if so, just how this is going to happen. I know how I’d like it to happen, but obviously, I’m not about to get my way on that aspect. Unless David can somehow muster the strength to, you know, but I think that might be too much to ask.

I’m expecting my period any day now. No more than a couple of days. Definitely sometime in the next week. When I think of it, I don’t think my cycle is at all average—some months Aunt Flo comes on the twenty-first day, other months it’s on the twenty-seventh day. I think that has something to do with forgetting to take my pill sometimes. At least I’m not completely irresponsible—I always use a condom as well. But my period always comes.

So all I have to do is wait a couple more days, talk to David, and then that’s it. This time next month I could be pregnant, and come March, I could be a mom! Or maybe April, just in case it doesn’t work the first time. But why wouldn’t it work? I’m the ultimate optimist about this now!

I focus on that and put David’s new lifestyle way back on the back burner so that I can enjoy Coop’s Canada Day party on Sunday. Cooper throws really good parties, but his best are the last-minute, spontaneous ones. More people show up, everyone’s in a terrific mood, and the food is always incredible. This one is no exception. July 1 falls on a Sunday this year—Coop starts inviting people on the Friday night. If I did that, maybe three people would show up, and all I’d have for them to eat would be a bag of nacho chips and a jar of no-name salsa. Not so for Cooper. About thirty people give him an enthusiastic yes out of the forty or so he e-mails. Coop then spends Sunday morning creating tasty tidbits in the kitchen, while giving Emma explicit instructions about how to decorate the backyard with his chili pepper patio lights.

″Coop and J.B. throw such good parties,” Brit said later as she appraised the backyard. It was almost six o’clock, and the yard was already full of music, people, and lots of food and beer. She helped herself to another tortilla chip, scooping up a healthy gob of Cooper’s homemade spicy pineapple salsa. “Where’s Morgan? Is she still talking to J.B.?”

I scanned the crowd until I saw Morgan standing by the bar area. J.B. was beside her, and as I watched, she laughed at something he said.

″Well, let’s hope Anil will get the message that Morgan’s moved on to bigger and better things and realize his mistake,” Brit mused.

″She handed him a beer,” I said dryly. “That would definitely get Anil all worked up if he could see them now. Have you seen her new place?” I asked, wanting to change the subject.

After Morgan spent a week in Brit’s guest room, Brit introduced Morgan to her real estate agent last week, and after an intensive daylong search of twenty-six townhouses, condominiums, and semidetached houses, Morgan bought a condo in the building across the street from Brit and moving in at the end of the month. I’m not sure she’ll last the month at Brit’s though. I was waiting for my turn to have Morgan crash on my couch.

″It’s great, same layout as mine. I’m wondering if she’s moving too fast, buying something on her own. What if Anil wants her back and—”

″Anil has a girlfriend,” Tom said abruptly. He’d been standing quietly behind Brit the whole time we were talking. Because Tom’s so quiet and Brit’s personality sort of overshadows him, it’s easy to forget he’s around. I’m not sure if it’s good for Brit to marry such a gentle soul. She needs someone to slap her down on occasion.

″What? Why wouldn’t you tell me something like that?” Brit screeched, giving him a poke with her long nails.

“I just did, dear. Please don’t hit me. I just found out this morning. Apparently, she’s his assistant. ”

Both Brit and I looked over to where Morgan was still talking animatedly to J.B. “I was hoping that wasn’t the reason,” I said bleakly.

″He’s such an asshole to do that to her. And to do it now—just before the wedding. What was he thinking? If the whole wedding party wouldn’t be thrown out of balance—I took everyone’s height and colouring into consideration, you know, in planning the ceremony—I would so not let him participate in our special day. Right, Tom?”

I sneaked a glance at Tom, who had an expression of resignation on his face. “Of course, dear.”

This, of course, reminded Brit of her wedding, and she started talking about the tuxedos the groomsmen were renting and how they had to complement—not match since Tom must stand out on his own—Tom’s own tuxedo. I kept glancing at Tom, wondering how he fared listening to Brit, but it seemed like he’d tuned her out. Sounds like a good idea, I decided.

Shortly though, Brit switched the subject by complimenting my dress. “It makes you look really good,” she told me sincerely. “I think you have lost weight. Not that you need to or anything.”

″Thanks,” I said. I was wearing a new blue and green sundress with a halter top. Normally I prefer not to go backless—too many freckles—but I fell in love with the dress as soon as I saw it. And even J.B. coming up behind me, poking my back with the remark about playing connect the dots, didn’t put me off it. I had my hair pulled back in a curly ponytail and even took some effort with my makeup. Even I thought I looked pretty good.

″Is David coming by?” Brit asked.

″He said he might.” I hadn’t said anything to either Brit or Morgan about David yet. Nothing about how he wanted to have a baby with me, or that he is now gay. I was trying to come to terms with it first.

″Well, you know I’m not in love with the idea of you allowing an ex back in your life,” Brit sniffed, “but I sincerely hope he can manage to get you off this baby kick.”

I decided not to respond to her, because really, what was I supposed to say?

Brit—sometimes it’s difficult to understand my friendship with Britney. It all comes down to two things—I know Brit loves me, since she has, unbelievable as it may seem, proved it countless times, and I’m a very loyal person. Most of my close friends have been in my life for ten, fifteen years. Coop, Emma, and J.B. are, of course, the exceptions, since most everyone else I’ve known since university or even high school days. I like to keep people in my life, and most of them seem okay with staying in it as well. With Brit, as little as we see eye-to-eye about things these days, I do love her, and as of yet, she hasn’t done anything horrible enough to justify the loss I would definitely experience if I gave her the boot.

“We can’t stay long,” Brit was now saying as Tom handed her a plate of garlic-chili shrimp hot enough to scorch the tongue. “Tom’s boss is taking us out on the boat to watch the fireworks. We have to meet him by seven-thirty at the harbour.”

″Isn’t that your sister?” Tom asked me.

I looked over to see Cooper give Libby a hug by the gate. Coop adores my sister. He’s always glad to see her, they find lots to talk about, and her open admiration of his cooking abilities always pumps up his ego. When I’m in one of my truly envious-of-Libby days, I torture myself by thinking Coop likes her more than he likes me.

I excused myself and walked over to my sister. “Hey, my big girl,” I said as Maddy flew into my arms. I was just saying hello to Luke when I heard a voice behind me that made me feel like I’d swallowed the tequila worm out of the bottle.

″Well, goodness, if I’d known there’d be a party, I might have dressed up a bit.”

The attempt at the pseudo-Southern accent froze the smile on my face. As my horrified eyes met Libby’s, I heard Luke’s “Oh, shit,” and watched him abandon his children by scurrying off toward the other side of the yard, where the table full of food was laid out. Libby and I turned around in unison, to find our mother at the gate of the backyard with two men.

″Um, hi? What are you doing here?” I asked my mother, using a voice that cracked like a prepubescent boy’s.

″Well, you could sound a bit more welcoming, sweetface,” my mother, aka Terri-with-an-i, said with a huge lipstick-y smile. She gave one of the men standing behind her a tug on the arm. “Isn’t this lovely to find both my girls here? And my darling grandbabies!” Terri reached down—difficult to do in the tighter-than-tight red skirt she was sporting—and tickled Max’s foot. “Hello, Maxie baby. And where’s my sweet little Madison?”

″It’s Max,” Libby said through clenched teeth. Our mother always has this effect on her. I value my life enough not to tell Libby that when she’s pissed off at Terri, she looks just like her .

″Hi there, Mrs. Samms,” Cooper said easily, like it’s every day my mother shows up uninvited at one of his parties. “It’s nice to see you again.”

″Oh, it’s Cooper, isn’t it?” Terri said coyly. She gave him a kiss on the cheek—aiming for the mouth, I suspect—but Coop moved at the last moment (smart man!), then reached up to wipe the cherry red lipstick mark off his face. “You get better looking every time I get to see you. I always say my Casey is so lucky to live with such a handsome man.”

″I didn’t invite her,” I hissed to no one in particular.

″Well, of course, you didn’t, sweetface, although I’m a bit hurt you didn’t think of it. No, Eric and I are heading out for a night on the town to celebrate, and we thought we’d stop in, Casey, and see if you were home. We brought along Eric’s little brother to introduce to you.” Terri pulled a second man beside her. “This is Derek. I thought you might have a lot in common. I thought the four of us might pop out for a drink, but seeing as you’re having this little party…”

I stared at my mother for so long that I didn’t even glance at Derek. “Pardon?” She was not thinking about setting me up with someone, was she? And for it to be the brother of the guy she’s dating…?

″Oh, Casey, don’t be rude. But I guess I should start with Eric, shouldn’t I?” she giggled. Terri’s attention was on me, and I noticed she’d forgotten all about her darling grandbabies. Maddy was hanging onto my leg, staring at Terri with fascination. “I’ve been meaning to talk to both of my girls for ages, especially now with so much to celebrate.”

″Well, let’s start your celebration here, then,” Cooper interrupted smoothly, seeing a way to escape. “What can I get you to drink, Mrs. Samms?”

″How many times, Cooper? It’s Terri, please. Especially for handsome young things like yourself.” I felt like gagging. Does my mother feel the need to flirt with everyone?

″Terri. And?” he looked at the silent man standing beside my mother.

″This is Eric,” she said, tucking her arm through his. “Eric Devine. You know, I would love one of those margaritas I see over yonder, and Eric here will have a beer. And Derek?” she glanced to the second man.

″Beer, please, if it’s not too much trouble. Thank you,” Derek said politely.

I finally glanced at him. He’s not unattractive or anything. Tall, with an olive complexion and slicked-back dark hair. Nice eyes, I guess. But really, there’s no way—even if she managed to bring Prince William around—I don’t think there would be any possible way I could be interested in a man my mother tried to set me up with.

″Thanks, sweetface,” Terri simpered.

Cooper followed Luke’s earlier move and made a run for it, but with more restraint than my brother-in-law. Terri turned back to Libby and me. Libby looked like she was waiting for the execution blindfold, and I suspect I looked the same. “So, my darling girls, aren’t you going to ask me what my Eric and I are in town to celebrate?”

This was not the mother I remembered, with her my darlings and her sweetfaces. My mother signed love to birthday cards, but never once said, “I love you.” Libby and I provided the affection to each other because we never got any from our parents. I think my mother must be overdoing it these days, trying to compensate for depriving us when we were growing up.

″Well?” Terri demanded when she sensed she was losing her audience.

″What are you celebrating, Mother?” I asked dutifully. “Something other than Canada Day?”

″With this man we’ve never met before?” Libby added scornfully.

″Libby, use your manners. This is Eric,” she said proudly. “My husband-to-be.”

″Well, that makes it even better,” Libby said sarcastically.

Eric gave us a pleasant, albeit unimpressive smile. I can’t say I smiled back. This news was a bit of a shocker, but not totally out of the blue. Terri never felt the need to give us any advance notice on her engagements or marriages. (This would be the fourth marriage since my father passed, and the sixth engagement.)

Eric was short, and on the young side. I’d wager his age to be anywhere between thirty-five and fifty. It’s always hard to tell with the receding hairline. That and the glasses that tinted almost black in the sunlight so I couldn’t see his eyes, and the ultra-pale legs poking out from beneath his khaki shorts with the pleat ironed down the front. I had to say the younger brother was by far the better-looking one of the two.

″You’re getting married. Again,” I managed. “Congratulations, I guess.”

″Well, of course, congratulations! I’ve never been so happy. Look,” she waved her ring in our stunned faces. I saw nothing but a shiny glare, and then Terri grabbed me in an embrace and all I could smell was her perfume. When she finally released me and grabbed a reluctant Libby—who still hadn’t said anything—Eric stepped forward.

″It’s nice to meet you, Casey.” He offered me his hand. He had a surprisingly deep voice for his appearance, sort of like a radio deejay. “Sorry this comes as such a shock.”

″It’s okay.” I had no idea what else to say. I was horrified when Terri remarried so quickly after my father died—of course, to a much younger man—and stunned with husband number three, who was considerably older and much wealthier. Neither marriage lasted very long—she divorced husband #2 after a little more than three years and buried #3 after only nine months. (Heart attack. In bed. Guess what they were doing?) In between those husbands were a few boyfriends, who declared their undying love with an engagement ring, so even though Terri and Eric professed to be engaged, with my mother’s track record, it didn’t mean much. The shock wore off the more engagements I heard about.

″It’s just happening so quick-like,” Terri giggled, letting go of Libby and latching on to Eric again. “We met—we met over the Internet, you know one of those dating sites—went on three dates, and then, what do you know? Eric pops the question! We didn’t even get a chance to really get to know each other, if you know what I mean.”

″Unfortunately,” Libby said dryly.

″When I first saw your mother, I just knew,” Eric said in his deep voice, making the story sound romantic, until you remembered he was speaking about my mother. “I knew I didn’t want to wait to spend the rest of our lives together.”

″Which might not be that long if you’re lucky,” Libby said under her breath. My mother continued to ignore her.

″Isn’t he just the sweetest?” Terri cooed, patting Eric’s face. “And isn’t he just the cutest?” She turned to Maddy, who was still standing as wide-eyed as I was. “What do you think, sweetface? Want to be in your Nana’s wedding? You’d be the perfect little flower girl for me.”

Cooper took this opportune moment to come back with his hands full of drinks and Morgan trailing behind. Coop passed out the drinks, which unfortunately diffused none of the tension.

″Morgan, sweetface, it’s been too long!” Terri swooped down on her with a clutching hug, almost spilling her drink all over Morgan. “You’re looking so wonderfully well. Eric, darling, this is Morgan, who has been friends with Casey almost forever, and… Morgan and Cooper, I’m just telling my girls my news. Eric and I are going to be married!” She gave a trill of laughter. “I think my girls might be a little surprised at the whole thing.”

″Wow. Well, all the best.” Cooper clinked glasses with Terri, then Eric. “Congratulations!”

″That’s… great,” Morgan managed. She gave me a wide-eyed glance, and I could only roll my eyes in response. Morgan knows the score with my mother, but like Cooper, she’s never had a problem getting along with her, probably because she’s not blood-related. But like a true friend, she takes one for the team, making all the necessary gushing remarks over the ring, which Libby and I couldn’t bring ourselves to, before backing up to make her escape. But before she left, her eyes fell on Derek, standing quietly on the other side of Terri. He was smiling at her.

″Oh, no,” I muttered to no one in particular.

″Hi there,” Morgan said, with the most flirtatious smile I’d seen in years. “I don’t think we’ve met.”

″I know we haven’t,” Derek told her. “Since there’s no way I could forget a face like yours.”

″Oh, please,” I muttered to myself.

″Morgan Riese,” she told him, holding out her hand. Derek took her hand, bowing over it, and touched it gently with his lips.

″Enchante,” he said with a surprisingly sexy smile. Smile or not, it was a truly cheesy move, and I fully expected Morgan to…

Giggle! She giggled.

″Oh, please.” This time I groaned. “You had to find the one full of cheese, didn’t you, Mom?” Of course, no one heard me, and I wrenched my eyes away from the disturbing sight of Morgan being fawned over. Not that I minded Morgan being fawned over—goodness knows, after what Anil put her through, no one deserved it more—but in my opinion, the last type of man she needed was the Rico Suave type. Especially if my mother brought him around.

Terri was still gushing to Cooper while Libby stood glowering by his side. What was happening with Morgan and Derek seemed far less nauseating, but I turned back to them in time to see Morgan leading him across the yard.

″Oh, but—” Terri called out. Then she glanced at me and shrugged. “I guess it was too much to hope for. Anyway, what do you think of our news? ”

″Um, congratulations,” I managed to say weakly. Libby gave me her death glare, but what could I do? Terri’s eagerness and need for approval is borderline pathetic, but oddly touching.

″You’re just going to accept this?” she cried. Despite her tiny frame and sweet-looking exterior, Libby has a ferocious temper. It’s quick, it’s nasty, and it’s not nice to see. And it comes out a lot when our mother is around.

″You’re just going to sit back and let her marry some guy we don’t even know? But then, why shouldn’t we just let her? It’s not like she took any interest in our lives, just sitting back and letting our father treat us like shit. She just sat back and watched, so you know, Mother, I hope you marry someone who treats you like shit so you know what it feels like!” I think she might have continued, but Cooper put a hand on her shoulder.

″It’s definitely a surprise,” he said mildly.

Libby gave her head a shake and motioned to Maddy to let go of my leg. “Look at what you make me do! I never, ever swear in front of my children, and now listen to me! Don’t think you’re going to use my children in your wedding either. Maybe you should wait until Casey has her baby, since she’s so accepting of the whole thing! Hear that, Mother? Casey wants to get pregnant without a husband or even a boyfriend in the picture, just some guy to ‘donate’!” Her fingers formed claws as she made quotation marks around the word.

″Libby!” I gasped. I was sure I would get around to telling my mother about having a baby when I got pregnant, but it wasn’t news to be blurted out like that.

″Oh, are you pregnant?” Terri turned to me with surprise.

″No, not yet. I’m just—”

″Well, it’s no surprise if you are. I was pregnant at eighteen with you, and we didn’t have to wait too long for Libby. I’m sure if your father didn’t drink so much and he could have performed adequately, I would have more kids.” I’m sure Libby and I have identical expressions of disgust at that comment, but it only gets worse as Terri continues.

″I would love to have more babies. In fact, another baby might be a wonderful idea, don’t you think, Eric? You’re just thirty-six, and I know you’d love a child of our own. I’ve heard of lots of women in their fifties who can carry a child. What a good idea! I’m strong and healthy, and goodness knows I’m still getting my monthlies—”

My mouth gaped open, and I had a fervent wish to have the ground open up and make me, or my mother, disappear into it. Anything that could remove those few statements from being imbedded in my mind for all time would do the trick.

″Excuse me. I feel the need to vomit,” Libby said. She took Maddy by the hand and picked up Max in his car seat and stalked off. “I hope you know what you’re getting into,” were her final words thrown like a dart toward Eric.

I looked at Cooper standing uncomfortably beside me. To give him credit, he wasn’t making a move to run away, but I was sure he didn’t want to hear any of this.

″Well, I knew she wouldn’t take it well,” Terri said, waving Libby away. “She’s always been the ungrateful, high-minded type. I’m surprised she’s found a man to put up with her moods. Always been moody, that one.”

″Mother!” I said reprovingly.

″Casey, you know what she’s like as well as I do.”

″No, actually, I don’t think you know what she’s like at all.”

Terri looked approvingly at me as I said that. “Got some backbone, did you, Casey? About time, I’d say.”

I reached forward and plucked the glass out of Terri’s hand. Time I showed some backbone, then. “Too bad you have to be off, Mother. Good to meet you, Eric. Thanks for deciding to tell us about your news. Have a good night.”