Unleashed Witch (The Primordial Queen #3)

31. Elzora

31

ELZORA

“ T his is very… you,” I mention, following Necos into his office.

I’ve yet to be invited into this space, and with how personal offices tend to be, I’ve not wandered in on my own yet.

In fact, I think the only other people who have been in here with him has been Eirik and Jasper.

The bowl of risotto I’ve brought feels oddly out of place as I settle into one of the leather chairs that probably cost more than anything I’ve ever bought for myself.

Let’s hope I don’t slop onto myself.

Everything about this room screams Necos—meticulous, deliberate, intimidating.

Dark wooden bookshelves line three of the walls from floor to ceiling, filled with leather-bound volumes whose spines bear titles in English, Latin, and a few languages I don’t even recognise.

A massive desk of the same dark wood dominates the room, its surface pristine except for a single crystal hourglass paperweight.

It’s beautiful, and as the silver specs catch in the light, I suspect it’s imbued with his magicae.

Mine rises forth, desperate to investigate, but I push it down and give Necos my full attention.

Unlike me, he hasn’t hesitated in getting comfortable and starting to eat.

“Now, I need you to understand something before we go into it all—your safety is paramount. We’re all working around the clock to prepare for this event, and you’re not going to be alone for a single second of it, okay?” Necos’s words sound far more like a threat than I imagine that my time witch wanted them to.

What he’s not understanding, though, is that I’m not so selfish to only worry about myself but about him, about Eirik, about Etrix—about all of my men, who shouldn’t be dragged into this.

“What’s that look for?” Necos murmurs, his voice unexpectedly gentle. The contrast between his tone and this imposing room makes my heart squeeze.

I focus on the large window behind his desk, watching the way the evening light seems to dim as it enters the room. There are strange shadows moving around the room as the sand— maybe?— in the hourglass continues to fall.

“I worry about my safety, sure,” I say quietly, tracing the intricate patterns carved into the arm of my chair. “But more than that, I worry for yours. For Eirik’s. For Etrix and Jasper. I care about each one of you, and that’s what scares me more than anything else.”

Necos sighs, leaning back in his seat a little, regarding me with an expression I can’t read.

“I know. But trust me when I say that you need to put yourself first this time, cor— ” He catches himself on the endearment, his jaw tightening as he corrects, “Zoe. We’re all expertly trained and can hold our own—yes, even Jasper is capable of surviving this. You’re terrified, I can hear it in your thoughts, but this is where you need to trust us.”

“I’m the weak link.” The words tumble out of my mouth as I look down at my once-appealing risotto. What smelt delicious and hearty just minutes ago now tastes like ash in my mouth.

“In this instance, Zoe, yes, you are. Ignoring everything else—you’re the nucleus of our bond, the centre, and all of us are going to be focused on you.”

“I understand. I’ll listen,” I promise, pushing the grains of rice around my bowl with my fork. “I’ll put my safety first.”

He breathes out a sigh of relief that seems to come from his very soul.

The large clock behind him ticks, and I don’t know if it’s because of his magicae or if I hadn’t heard it before now.

He takes a spoonful of his risotto and eats some of his food as my brain goes into overdrive.

My time witch is clearly terrified, and I know I’ve not really been helping with all the visions of doom and gloom.

This event isn’t going to go well, but as long as we all survive, that’s all that matters.

“Exactly.” Necos reaches across the gaps between our two arm chairs and places his hand on mine for a single heartbeat. It’s warm, larger than mine, and feels so safe that my soul aches when he pulls away, adopting that mask of distance once again.

The crystal paperweight on his desk seems to move faster.

“On the morning of the event, you’ll travel from here to the castle with Eirik and Etrix, where the three of you will greet Aria and her harem and go to the parade together.”

His words are precise, measured, like the ticking of the clock behind him.

“You’re intrigued by Aria,” I say as snippets of information seem to download into my brain.

A brief conversation Necos had with Eirik—they discussed Aria and her harem and how they mused over their positions in the oncoming war.

The vision is sharp and clear like watching a movie playing across one of these leather-bound book covers.

Necos raises a brow, his expression cooling into one of firm distance. “Are you reading my thoughts?”

“Not on purpose.” My words are sheepish, and I take a small spoonful of risotto to try and help my embarrassment. It was a poor decision, though, based on the way it sticks to my very dry mouth.

My eyes sting as I try to gulp down some of my water to clear it, nearly knocking over the crystal glass he’d provided.

Necos watches me hide my struggle, his perfect composure in this perfectly composed room making me feel even more awkward and ungraceful. Something about this man’s flawless control just makes me feel clumsy and weak in comparison.

And, unlike the others, he never tries to reassure me of this feeling either.

“Aria and Eirik had an interesting interaction a few weeks back, and we’re keeping an eye on her,” Necos says, seeming ignorant to my near-choking episode. “For now, none of them are to be trusted, but we don’t think you’re in any danger around her.”

“Good to know. So we meet her and her men, then we go to the parade?” I ask, my voice tight. He’ll probably mistake it for anxiety about the event rather than realising I was practically choking on his pristine chair moments ago.

“Sadly. Etonik will already be there, working with the security teams, publicists, media, everyone. You, Etrix, Eirik, and Aria will arrive maybe thirty minutes or so before it begins—just as the area opens to the public.”

He dabs at his chin with a handkerchief, I have no idea where he had it, before taking a sip of his water.

“This is the first big event we’ve had since Eirik graduated high school a few years ago, so they’re very excited. He never even had one for his maturing earlier this year.”

“Why not? Is that typical?”

Necos sighs, looking at me from over the rim of his bowl. “Eirik matured earlier than Etonik did, and, unofficially, his father is jealous.”

“Of course, he is.” The bitterness in my voice is clear to hear, and Necos’s eyes flash silver before he smooths out his expression.

“The fanfare begins on the hour, and you’ll be centre stage the entire time, with too many cameras to count. The good news about that is everyone can see you—meaning us . The crowd will be filled with rebels, and we’re going to be on high alert.”

“But the bad news is that I’ll be broadcast across an entire nation as I try desperately not to embarrass Eirik, Etrix, or any of you.” I let out a slow breath as my stomach threatens to hurl. Nope, Zoe, don’t do it—not on what’s probably some priceless antique rug. “And after the big announcement?”

“The parade starts. You’ll be forced onto some obnoxious and probably very ugly float, waving and interacting with the crowd as you make your way around the city.”

“Around the city?” I ask, tilting my head. A curl gets in my eyes, and I resist the urge to pull at it, not wanting to seem fidgety or restless in front of Necos. “How long am I going to be stuck on it?”

“I’d guess an hour or so. Again—you’ll be highly televised, and although we don’t expect an attack whilst you are on the move?—”

“You don’t expect an attack at all,” I interrupt, clutching my fork tighter in my hand, the metal cool against my palm. “Or you don’t expect an attack to happen at that moment?”

The clock’s ticking seems to grow louder, the hands moving faster, watching my rigid pulse. The silver in Necos’s eyes seem to swirl more rapidly, and I don’t know whose anxiety is influencing whose.

His gaze fills with understanding as his smile tightens. “I’m sorry, Zoe, but it’s highly likely that some form of attack is going to take place.”

“This is because of the visions, isn’t it?” I mutter. Nearly every day since the invitation came, I’ve had a vision of this Royal Showcase.

Of death, destruction, blood, and shadows.

I don’t understand, not really, most of the time they’re too chaotic to even notice anything. I can feel my fear, and I know that what I’m seeing is my future.

“Not only because of those, but they’re part of it, yes,” he admits. His hand twitches, and he lifts his fork up—part of me wonders if that was to resist the urge to comfort me again.

I sigh. “I’m sorry. I wish I could be more help with that.”

Necos shakes his head, the movement causing the silver veins in his neck to bulge. I didn’t realise he had such a tight control over his magicae, and it’s something I’m quite jealous of.

“Don’t apologise for something you have no control over, cor —Zoe, okay?”

“Okay. What else?” I murmur as his lips draw into a frown. I don’t know what he was about to say before correcting it with my name, but it seems to have upset him.

Which is the only thing I seem able to do to him these days.

“Once you’re back, there will be a closing ceremony, and he’ll likely announce some form of ball or event. Then, Etonik will leave, and you and Aria, will be expected to hold court.”

His voice has taken on that distant, teaching tone that I’ve grown to hate.

“Hold court?” I say the words aloud, a frown on my face as I try to understand. The leather of my chair sticks to my thighs as I shift uncomfortably under his gaze. “What does that even mean?”

Necos’s eyes drop to his plate, and his frustration builds. I can feel it, dimly, in my chest, but the darkening of his aura is clear.

The clock’s ticking seems to stutter for a moment as if responding to his emotion.

Really, Zoe?

“You’ll be expected to greet every member who wishes an audience. They’ll talk with you, likely try to hug you or even ask for things…” Necos trails off, smoothing out the handkerchief by his bowl. “Aria wanted an audience with you to explain all of this, but Theran has held her off for now.”

“I don’t want to meet with her.” My words are a whisper, my vision blurring with tears. I take small but deep breaths, not wanting Necos to notice my despair.

This isn’t something we have control over, so I just need to get used to it.

“We expected,” Necos says, his carefully controlled voice at odds with the rapid falling of the sand. “Believe me, Elzora, if I could shield you from this… if I could protect you from what is to come, I would do it in a heartbeat.”

How can a man so distant, so… formal , incite such feelings in me with such grand declarations?

I nod, dropping my head, as I try to eat the flavourless gruel in front of me. Necos has no issue, clearing his plate long before I manage to eat even half, and conversation between us is muted and dry.

He’s clearly unhappy with me, and partly at the situation, but it makes being around him hard. It never used to be this bad, the tension between us both, but ever since we moved in, he’s been pulling further and further away.

“Are you feeling okay, Zoe?” he asks, and, for a moment, his formal mask slips.

I nod my head, meeting his eyes with a tense smile. “I’m just a little overwhelmed with it all. I don’t have much of an appetite anymore.”

Necos sighs. “I’m sorry. We should’ve done this after food.”

I laugh, humourlessly and pathetically, but I’ve tried. “Don’t be silly. I wanted to know—I need to know.”

“Things are in hand—yes, even your outfit. Etrix has Owlyn working on your dress, and I think she’ll be coming with Fayetta to do your final measurements.”

“You called me out on reading thoughts,” I tease weakly. “But thank you. I was a little worried about that.”

“I’m sure it’ll be gorgeous.”

I’m sure it’ll be gorgeous.

Why do I care that he specified? We were talking about the dress…

“Me, too.” The words feel bitter on my tongue. “Thank you for taking the time to go over this with me. I’ll go get these cleared up before my dad arrives.”

“Leave them. I’ll sort them.”

He rises to his feet, and, suddenly, we’re both standing, staring at each other awkwardly.

The ticking matches my heart once more. I really should get my heart checked over with the stress I’m putting on it these days.

“See you later.” I somehow find the confidence to be the one to end this, turning towards the heavy wooden door that suddenly feels miles away.

“Okay, cor —Zoe,” he says, stumbling over my name once more.

My head hangs low as I turn away, rushing to leave the room.

“Zoe?” Necos calls. I turn around, my hand hovering on the door handle, so close to my escape but so far at the same time. “Do you… please be safe tonight, okay?”

I nod my head and turn back around, ready to leave, before sighing and striding over to where he’s sitting. I’ve already made a fool of myself, let’s just commit to the bit at this point.

Necos’s eyes widen with surprise, and I don’t blame him—my legs are trembling as my emotions war between confidence and shock.

“What were you going to say?” I ask, sounding so much braver than I feel.

“It was nothing.”

“Since we moved in here, things have been different,” I say quietly. “You’ve been ignoring me and trying so hard to make it so that we’re never alone, even when training. If I didn’t know better… I’d think you were pushing me away because you were done with our relationship.”

“Every move I make?—”

“Is political and meticulously thought out,” I murmur, looking at the lobe of his left ear so I can avoid his eyes and the silver magicae swirling within them. “You want me to be safe, protected, and happy—but you refuse to let yourself be part of my life. Not really, not more than you’re already giving me. I wish… I wish you’d tell me why.”

“Why what, Elzora?” he demands, a resigned look in his face, true exhaustion in his tone.

“Why I’m not good enough? Why I’m not worth it?” I sniffle, not bothering to wipe the falling tears. Let them stain this perfect rug. “I wish you’d tell me what is more important than us.”

He shakes his head, and, for the first time since I’ve known him, something in his perfect control splinters. “Nothing is more important than you.”

He rises to his feet, his height once an intimidation now just feels like another thing he’s using to put distance between us. Our bodies are an inch or so apart, but that makes no difference when he won’t close the gap—physically, mentally, or metaphorically.

I let out a gasp as the hourglass on his desk shatters without warning, fragments of… time spilling across his desk.

He waves his hand, and instantly, it’s fixed, restarting the count once more.

“ Nothing is more important than you,” he repeats.

“You say that, but yet, you can’t even tell me why you’re doing what you’re doing. You can’t tell me how it benefits me, why it’s important that my soul aches when I’m around you from the barriers you’re putting between us.”

“ Why ?” He’s angry, frustrated, and none of it is at me for a change. There’s such a burning feeling of hatred coming from his side of the bond that it makes me rub my chest as I cry. “You want me to tell you why I’ve got to push you away? Why I can’t be around you without hating myself? Why every single moment of your life is something I’ve got to hide away from?”

“Yes!” I shout, surprising myself. I’m sobbing, my chest so tight, my soul in agony.

The books on his shelves tremble, their spines glowing gold, and I know he has them warded for their own protection.

Smart, when there’s a resident explosive in the room.

“I need to know, Necos, so that I can stop blaming myself for not being good enough. For being too young, too stupid, too everything you don’t want .”

“Don’t want?” He shakes his head, his eyes a brighter silver than the veins on his arms, than the time magicae floating freely around us. “My life would be so much fucking easier if I didn’t want you, Elzora. It would make this entire fucking ruse so much easier if I just didn’t want you.”

“Then what is it?” I sound so broken, so pathetic, but part of me is glad I’ve laid everything bare.

“Every fucking thing I do is for you, Zoe. I can’t get close to you when it puts you in danger. Because I can’t know what makes you smile or makes you cry without also learning what scares you and what pains you. I can’t let myself feel the depth of my love for you when I know it’s only me being selfish.”

My tears cloud my vision and clearly stop my brain from functioning properly. “I don’t understand.”

“My sister is the most twisted fucking bitch I’ve ever met,” Necos spits, and the clock on the wall cracks. “And if I do my part well, she’ll never, ever find out about you, about our connection. She’s… she’s warped, Zoe, and she could hurt you—hurt us all. But if I fail, if she learns of you… I could never forgive myself. If I let her learn about you through me…”

He trails off, taking a big heaving breath as anger fuels my tirade.

“That’s… Necos, you can’t deny yourself a chance at life because of that,” I snap, tears streaming down my face. “Don’t you think the others might feel the same way? Look at Eirik and Etrix and what their dad does. At Ryes and his dad. You’re not her, you’re you , and I just… I want to get to know you as Necos, my anima nexum, and not Necos the teacher, the rebel, the spy… the man of many faces.

“You’re not a man who needs to carry the weight of everyone else’s choices, Necos. You’re more than her shadow. You’re you , and that’s who I want, who I choose. Please, don’t spend the rest of our lives pushing me away out of some misguided attempt at protection.

“Haven’t you seen me? Seen the life I live? I’m a soul witch harbouring the type of magicae that guarantees a death sentence to those using it. I’m one of two survivors of the Primordial Royal Line because, weirdly, every other person has been murdered. My parents, my grandma, the lady who helped deliver me… dead.

“I’ve got more enemies than we know of and a giant prophecy foretelling how I could either save the world or condemn it. That me—a bumbling nobody, is meant to be some powerful Queen who unites Mitagus and defeats some twisted dark witch.

“But you think that your sister is the one who is going to end me? That you’re the one who is going to endanger me even more than the countless death sentences I already have hanging over me?”

My laugh is bitter and horribly unlike myself as I cry, and sniffle, and break down in front of him. The magicael chaos in the room settles suddenly, and I don’t know if this is the calm before my storm or if Necos has calmed himself down.

“Don’t be this man, Necos, please.” My words are a pathetic last ditch attempt to gather something from this conversation.

“Who would you rather I be instead, Elzora?” He’s back to that exhausted tone, the one lacking any true emotion.

“I’d rather you were mine ,” I whisper.

His eyes flash silver, and he bends down, kissing me furiously, passionately, wholeheartedly. I wrap my arms around his neck, and without breaking apart, he tugs me into his lap, sitting us down together, the force of our kiss bruising my lips.

Time and soul fusing together as our moment becomes suspended in time. I let my hands trail down his chest, feeling his rigid muscles. He’s gripping my hips, almost as if he’s holding himself back from pushing me.

Doesn’t he realise I’d give him anything?

“Fuck,” he whispers against my lips, his eyes still silver as he takes me in. I can sort of see the reflection of myself in his orbs—rosy cheeks, swollen lips, and red-rimmed eyes. What a vision.

“Don’t you feel what I do?” I whisper, clinging to his suit jacket.

He holds me closer, blinking slowly, as he shakes his head. “I don’t think I do.”

“Necos, please?” I beg, tears in my eyes.

“You don’t understand, Elzora—I know for a fact that I don’t feel what you do. I know that the love you have for me is genuine and true. But the love I have for you? It’s all-consuming. It burns, it energises, it fucking consumes,” he snarls, tightening his hold on my hips. “And that’s why I can’t do this. I’ve already fucked up. That one taste of you is going to be on my mind constantly.”

I can see the pain he’s in darkening his aura, feel it within his soul, but I can’t feel it from the bond that he’s once again shut down.

“I hate that you’re doing this to us,” I whisper, dropping down onto my bum, ignoring the heat from his thighs.

“I can take your hatred, Zoe. I won’t put you in danger. Not now, not ever. Sure, you’re the master of souls, cor meum , but someone has to protect yours.”

I sniffle as he lifts me from his lap, gently placing me on my feet next to him. He takes my hand in his and squeezes gently.

The clock begins to repair itself, magicae knitting the cracks back together, as he unravels time itself.

“Don’t cry over boys, princess, they’re not worth your tears.”

“This one is.”

He brushes the falling tears from my cheeks, giving me such a look of love that I’m scared I’ve walked into a different dimension and this isn’t my Necos.

“Go get ready for your session with your dad.”

I nod, brushing my tears away, as I turn and head out. I stop at the door, not turning to look at him as I call out, “Just so you know, I’m not done proving to you that this is worth the risk.”

I step into the hallway just in time to hear his parting words drift through the once again perfect office. “You already have, cor meum .”