19. Greer
19
Greer
O ur little fun delayed us a bit, so we leave Luke’s house later than intended. In our small town, Fourth of July is a massive production. The celebrations last all week, building up to the highlight of the holiday—fireworks. Almost everyone gathers at the high school football field in order to watch the spectacular display.
The road leading up to the school is packed and cars are parked every which way, but thankfully, Luke finds a parking space. He pulls forward, then shifts the truck into reverse, using one hand to expertly back into the spot with ease.
“Of course you back in.” I roll my eyes.
“Such a guy thing to do,” Navy teases from the backseat, sitting next to Sutton.
Luke laughs. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“Guys who back into every parking spot are just trying to show off their big dick energy. Oh, this small little parking space? Watch me back my giant-ass truck into it that you couldn’t fit your Prius in.”
“I mean, I do have a big dick,” Luke throws out as he jumps out of the truck.
“Ew!” Sutton makes a barfing noise. “That is not what I needed to know about my brother.”
“How big?” Navy whisper-yells, jabbing her elbow into my side. Much to my dismay, my body immediately flushes beet red. Sex banter with friends is another first for me.
Through a tight smile, I say under my breath, “Big enough.”
“Oh my god, did you guys have sex?” Navy probes.
Shaking my head, I wait for the rest of the group to get ahead of us before I reply. It’s one thing talking about this with the girls and a whole other talking about it with everyone. Sutton and Grace fall back to walk with us. The little girl inside me loves that we’re all dressed similarly in jean shorts, tanks, and boots.
“No, we haven’t,” I say.
“Haven’t what?” Sutton asks.
Grace busts out laughing. “Uh, Sutton, are you sure you wanna be a part of this convo?”
“Of course I do. Why? What are we talking about?”
“Me and Luke.”
“Oh." Sutton's tone makes me think she’s contemplating whether or not she wants to run for the hills. “No details. Got it?” Sutton says. We all nod our heads in acquiescence.
“We haven’t had sex yet,” I say.
“Then how do you know Luke is big enough ?” Navy blurts, causing Sutton to choke on her water while Grace dissolves into uncontrollable giggles.
“Because”—my eyes widen, warning everyone to calm down—“we’ve done other things.”
Each intimate moment with Luke floats through my mind. Six months ago, if someone had asked me about this, I would have laughed in their face and joked that I’d already resigned myself to life as an old maid, single-handedly keeping the adult toy companies in business. But as time passed, I honestly couldn't ignore the growing ache of loneliness that crept in a little more each day. Even before meeting Luke, I'd started to realize it wasn’t a matter of if— it was a matter of when I'd finally open my heart, body, and mind to someone again.
“And? How did it go?” Navy asks, resting her arm in the crook of my elbow. Grace and Sutton follow suit and we walk, linked arm in arm, casually discussing my sex life.
“Well, shit.” Grace fans her face. “I don’t know whether to be proud of you or insanely jealous.”
“Both.” Navy giggles. “And how is your shroud of guilt?”
“Surprisingly well,” I say. “I mean, so far, everything we’ve done has made me feel like I’m getting back to my old self. Maybe not even a version of my old self. It’s almost like, I don’t know, I’m coming into my potential.”
“That’s what she said.” Navy snorts. We all burst into a fit of giggles, stopping us in our tracks.
“What the hell are y’all talking about?” Hunter says over his shoulder. The rest of the guys pause, casting expectant eyes toward us. When Luke bites that damn lip of his, I know he knows exactly what we’re talking about. And I’m certain my body is the exact color he loves so much.
“C’mon, boys,” Luke says. “Let’s grab drinks while the ladies get a spot.” Desire rushes through me at his parting wink.
It takes some effort, but we finally find an open patch of grass. It’s not much, but we manage to lay out a few blankets and settle in. This is the first time I’ve been to the fireworks show in years. Brian always preferred smaller gathering with friends, so we usually skipped the big town events and spent the evening at someone’s house instead.
“What about the communication?” Navy asks. My ears buzz just thinking about how much Luke loves to communicate.
“What is that smile for?” Sutton cringes. “If you’re about to tell me my brother is a dirty talker, please don’t. There are some details I cannot and do not need to know.”
“Luke really likes communication,” I manage to say through laughter. Navy and Grace fall back on the ground, clutching their chests, overcome with giggles.
As the evening progresses, our group grows and shrinks as people from around town stop by to chat with the guys. They’re like celebrities, and Navy and Sutton are just as popular.
It’s weird, being on the fray, watching how in tune they all are with people . I make an excellent introvert. I will people, but only when I must. Even though Brian was an extrovert among his friends, he never judged me when I kept myself on the outskirts. Luke, on the other hand, doesn’t miss a single opportunity to introduce me to someone or pull me into conversations. By the time we settle in for fireworks, I’m exhausted.
“Is it always like this?” I ask, referring to the never-ending stream of people.
“Pretty much,” everyone answers simultaneously.
Luke scoots closer and leans back on his hands, pressing the sides of our thighs together. An excited buzz whispers through the air as everyone quiets down and prepares for the show. Luke crosses his feet at the ankles. I tilt away to wipe the corner of my mouth. It should be illegal to make Wranglers and a navy T-shirt look this good. Add the boots? I’m a goner.
A hush falls over the crowd as the stadium lights wink out one by one. Suddenly, color and sound erupt in the sky above. Red, white, and blue sparkles glitter down overhead. Laughter and excited wows from nearby children make me smile.
My hand brushes Luke’s as I lie back on the blanket, crossing my feet at the ankles, to marvel at the energy of light and sound above. Each boom jars me, evoking a childlike giggle. I am levitating—my body, heart, and mind free. If it weren’t for my friends around me, I’d float away into the sky and dance among the glittering display. Luke remains motionless, his gaze burning into my cheek.
“The fireworks are up there, mister.”
“I know,” he says.
Tilting my head toward him, our gazes lock. The wrinkles around his eyes are smooth and his breathing is slow and steady, but his eyes are clouded with something else entirely.
My stomach tumbles over the edge into infinity as Luke leans down on his elbow. Warmth seeps into my skin when his free hand traces the side of my neck before pulling my lips to his.
Something changes inside me then.
A crack in my heart, one I believed was irreparably shattered, begins to mend. His lips tenderly brush mine, healing another fissure. Under the canopy of light, Luke seeps into every cell, coaxing life back into me. With each kiss, each gentle caress, my heart slowly stitches itself together until only a small, fragile fracture remains.
There.
In the very back.
Buried deep.
Luke settles next to me, shoulder to shoulder, and gathers my hand in his. No words are needed. In that shared silence, a world of understanding unfolds between us.
“I can’t tell you how badly I want what they have,” I hear Navy whisper to Sutton.
“Me too, babe,” Sutton says. “Me too.”
The fireworks show continues overhead, but I’m no longer paying attention. My head tilts to the side, and our eyes meet. In that moment, my soul expands, and a quiet sigh of relief escapes me. A wave of happiness washes over me when I catch the glisten of tears in his eyes. It's as if, in this moment, everything stretches out before us, infinite and full of possibility.
We stay like that—hand in hand, our souls entwined in the quiet space between us—while the finale unfolds somewhere beyond, just a faint echo in the background.
Even as the crowd erupts into cheers and people prepare to leave, we don't move. Our friends call their goodbyes, but we remain lost in our moment.
The crowd fades, night fully descends, and still . . .
We stay like that.