16
The campus coffee shop hummed with quiet chatter and the occasional hiss of the espresso machine. I sat in the corner by the window, my laptop open in front of me and my hands curled around a steaming mug of chamomile tea. Outside, students hurried past, bundled in coats against the crisp fall air. But inside, I felt anything but calm. I was trying to focus on my novel, but the words on the screen blurred together, my thoughts hijacked by the double date. More specifically, by Campbell.
I pressed my lips together, my fingers tightening around the mug. Nevaeh recounted a fun night, emphasizing Campbell’s delightful personality. I smiled and nodded in all the right places, but my stomach twisted with guilt. I shouldn’t feel this way. He wasn’t my Campbell.
My gaze flicked up when the door chimed. I saw him walking in like he owned the place, his broad shoulders cutting through the line of students waiting for caffeine. I looked down, pretending to be absorbed in my screen. I hunched, wanting to disappear. But I could feel him, like heat, radiating across the room. His presence was impossible to ignore. My fingers hovered over my keyboard, poised to type anything to distract me, but the scrape of a chair ruined it.
“Someone looks serious.” My heart lurched. I looked up, feigning surprise, though I wasn’t sure how convincing it was. Campbell sat across from me, his long legs stretching under the table. “Is this one of your many study spots?” He asked, leaning back in his chair and giving me one of those easy smirks that made my pulse quicken.
I forced a smile, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
“It’s quiet. Good for getting work done.”
Campbell raised an eyebrow, glancing at the blank screen.
“Doesn’t look like you’re getting much done.”
My cheeks flushed.
“I was about to.”
“Sure you were.” He leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table. “What’s the essay about?”
I hesitated. I would not tell him I was working on my book. Especially when the book was about him . So, I opted to lie.
“Just a literature analysis. Nothing exciting.”
“Exciting enough to look that intense.” He teased, his lips twitching into a grin.
I bit the inside of my cheek, trying not to smile back.
“Shouldn’t you be busy? Classes, hockey, Nevaeh?”
At the mention of my best friend’s name, his grin faltered. And I noticed his hands tightened into fists on the table.
“Speaking of dates,” he said, his tone casual but his eyes sharp. “You seemed like you had fun with Nate.”
I blinked, surprised.
“What do you mean?”
He tilted his head, watching me.
“You both seemed cozy together.”
My stomach twisted.
“It wasn’t anything. I was just there for Nevaeh.”
“Is that so?” He asked, his voice laced with skepticism. He leaned back in his chair, studying me like an advanced puzzle. “Didn’t seem like you minded his company.”
I frowned, a flicker of annoyance rising in my chest.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing,” he said quickly, though his smirk returned. “You just looked like you were having a good time.”
I stared at him, trying to decode the undertone in his voice. Was he jealous? Or was I imagining things?
“Why do you care?”
Campbell’s expression didn’t change.
“I don’t. Just making conversation.”
I didn’t believe him, but I would not push him. I ignored the flutter in my chest and returned to my work. Whatever was going on with him didn’t matter. It shouldn’t matter. Campbell continued to scrutinize me when I looked up. For a moment, the awkwardness of last night and the guilt of my feelings for him melted away, leaving unspoken tension crackling between us.
My phone buzzed quietly on the table, the screen lighting up with a notification. I glanced at it, my heart sinking as I saw Nate’s name.
Nate: Had a great time. Want to grab dinner again soon?
I stared at the text for a moment, unsure how to respond. Nate was sweet, and the evening had been fine. But something about it felt off. Forced, maybe. Like I was trying too hard to like him. He was leaving soon, anyway. I didn’t realize I’d been silent for so long until Campbell cleared his throat.
“Let me guess,” he said, his smirk bordering on smug, “Prince Charming wants to see you again?”
I locked my phone and shoved it into my bag, avoiding his gaze.
“It’s none of your business.”
Campbell leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms.
“You didn’t deny it.”
My cheeks burned.
“So, what if he does?”
He raised an eyebrow, his gaze flicking to my bag as if he could still see my phone through it.
“Just saying you could do better.”
My breath hitched. My head snapped toward him, my heart pounding.
“Isn’t he supposed to be your best friend?”
Campbell shrugged, his expression unreadable.
“That’s exactly why I said it.”
I narrowed my eyes, searching for some clues.
“Are you trying to say something about Nate? Or is this just another one of your stupid games?”
His eyes held a momentary, unidentifiable flicker. But then his smirk returned, and whatever I thought I’d seen was gone.
“No games,” he said lightly, though his voice carried an edge I couldn’t ignore. “I’m just looking out for you.”
I felt a wave of frustration bubble up inside me.
“I don’t need you to look out for me, Campbell. Nate’s nice. He’s thoughtful. And at least he doesn’t spend his time making me feel—”
I stopped myself, biting my lip.
“Feel what?” Campbell asked, leaning forward. His voice was low, daring me to continue.
My pulse raced as I forced myself to focus on the screen. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of responding. But deep down, his words lingered, stirring something I wasn’t ready to confront. And when I finally looked up, Campbell was still watching me, his smirk fading into something softer.
My hands hovered over the keyboard, pretending to type, but the words blurred into meaningless shapes on the screen. I could feel Campbell’s gaze on me, steady and unrelenting, and it made my pulse quicken. I couldn’t do this.
The memory of Nevaeh’s excitement after the date flashed through my mind: how my best friend had leaned over the edge of my bed, gushing about how charming Campbell was, and how easy their conversation had been. I nodded along, forcing smiles that felt heavier with each passing second. And now I was sitting across from him, my heart betraying my better judgment with every stolen glance.
“Ellis,” Campbell’s voice broke through my spiraling thoughts, smooth but weighted. “You okay?”
My head snapped up, my eyes meeting his. The concern etched in his expression only deepened my guilt. I didn’t deserve his worry—not when I was breaking every unspoken rule of friendship just by being here.
“I’m fine.” I said too quickly, my voice was higher than I intended.
I snapped my laptop shut, my hands fumbling as I started shoving my things into my bag. Campbell frowned, leaning forward.
“What are you doing?”
“I just remembered I have a thing.” I stammered, avoiding his eyes.
I stuffed my charger into the bag with trembling hands, cursing myself for not being more composed.
“A thing?” He echoed, skepticism laced in his tone.
“Yes,” I said, forcing my voice to steady. “Something for class. I forgot about it, and I’m already late.”
Campbell’s brow furrowed.
“Hazel, classes are over for the day.”
My stomach twisted, and I zipped my bag with a sharp tug, refusing to answer. I couldn’t stay here—not with the way his presence pulled at me, not with the weight of Nevaeh’s happiness pressing down on my shoulders. As I slung the bag over my shoulder, Campbell stood, blocking my path.
“You’re running.” He said, his voice low and matter-of-fact.
I froze, my breath hitching.
“I’m not.”
“You are,” he countered, his tone soft but firm. “You always do this when I’m around.”
I looked up at him, my resolve crumbling under the intensity of his gaze. I contemplated staying, explaining myself, and opening up. About holding on to the thoughts that, beneath it all, he was my Campbell. Nevaeh’s laughter resonated, intensifying my guilt. This wasn’t my story.
“I can’t do this.” I whispered, shaking my head.
Campbell’s expression shifted, a flicker of something I couldn’t name crossing his face. He stepped aside, giving me just enough space to slip past him.
“Hazel.” He called after me, but I didn’t stop.
The cold air outside the coffee shop hit me like a slap, but it wasn’t enough to clear my head. I walked quickly, my legs carrying me away from the tension, the guilt, and Campbell’s piercing gaze. I had to remind myself that, although he resembled the Campbell from my book, it didn’t necessarily mean he was. I lost my Campbell the day I finished my book, and I would never have him back.