Chapter 49
Embarrassment slams into me, causing my face to burn with shame. It pairs with a sense of vulnerability and exposure that I hadn’t anticipated experiencing tonight. I want to jump out the nearest window.
I glance around, catching glimpses of curious stares directed our way. “What… What is it?” I finally manage, my voice shaking. Fuck Xavier and his command for silence. If I make it out of here without screaming, it’ll be a miracle.
June hesitates, her expression full of sympathy. “It’s just one word. ‘Mine.’”
I’m going to fucking kill Xavier.
It’s a good thing he told me not to look at any other recruit because if I see a look of disappointment—or even worse disgust—on Ben’s face when he returns to his seat, I’m going to cry. Not to mention the fact that my foster brother is currently getting tattoos that signify he’s killed people. If I don’t look at him, I won’t have confirmation of the number of lives he’s taken.
As the ceremony progresses, my agitation grows. Along with my level of self-consciousness. One by one, the recruits return to their seats, their newly tattooed feathers flowing under the UV lights. I don’t have to see them to hear their snickers or feel their gazes on my back.
Throughout my humiliation, Xavier remains at the front, the recruit with the most marks. I count them, and the heat of embarrassment leaves my cheeks, leaving me pale. He’s been summoned ten times.
Xavier has killed at least ten people, if not more.
This part of the ritual is a validation of his skills, something he can show off with pride. I’m beginning to think he was right about being the best person to protect me from the Order.
Despite my admiration and fear at Xavier’s exploits, my anger continues to rise. The word ‘mine’ written on my skin is a claim of possession, similar but dirtier than the brand on my shoulder. I know without a doubt this was a deliberate act meant to mark me as his in front of this assembly of the world’s most dangerous individuals.
The real question is why? Did he do it to embarrass me? To put me in my place? Or is he so deranged that he believes marking me with his cum is what it takes to keep other men away from me?
My intuition says it’s all of them.
As the final feather is filled in and Xavier rises from the chair and makes his way back to his seat, the complexity of my feelings for him is overwhelming. My skin is buzzing with energy, and my limbs are twitching. I’m torn between attacking and kissing the man beside me.
Xavier has driven me insane.
Admitting to myself that he’s right for the second time in one evening really chaps my ass. When he said that I look at him like I want to kill and fuck him, he wasn’t wrong. And still isn’t.
When the regular lights flicker back to life, I smother a sigh of relief that the cum is no longer visible and glowing. Keeping my head bowed, I fold my hands in my lap to keep from strangling the man beside me.
Xavier, either uncaring or oblivious to my fury, grabs the back of my neck again. I stiffen under his touch. The pressure of his hold doesn’t increase like I expect. Instead, he massages the side of my neck and the curve where it meets my shoulder.
The word ‘mine’ sits just under his tender ministrations, a declaration that ignites both anger and arousal.
The robed member, his presence as commanding as ever, returns to the altar, drawing the room’s attention back to the front. And away from me. Thank God. If He’s even listening to this cum-stained girl’s prayer…
“The Crow’s Covenant is complete,” the man says.
His voice irritates me with its familiarity. Xavier’s father. It took me the entire ceremony to figure it out, but now that I have, I want to get out of here even more.
“We have witnessed the embodiment of skill, dedication, and determination. Our recruits have not only accepted the marks of their accomplishments but have also embraced the weight of the responsibility those marks represent.”
I try to tune him out, but with nothing else to concentrate on, I find myself absorbing his words. And the unspoken ramifications behind them.
“The Trials that lie ahead,” the council member continues, his tone growing more solemn, “will be full of danger and the utmost challenge. They are designed to test not just your physical strength and skill, but your mental resilience, your loyalty, and your ability to adapt and overcome.
“You are the future of this Order, the guardians of our way of life. Rise to the challenge, and may you emerge victorious.”
With the ceremony officially over, the assembly gets to their feet. Xavier stands and pulls me up with him, his fingers still clasping the back of neck. It’s a possessive gesture that isn’t necessary given the cum across the top of my spine.
I glare up at him and part my lips. He squeezes my neck with a shake of his head. “Not here,” he says, so low I barely hear him.
We exit the chapel together, leaving behind the vaulted ceilings painted with angels and saints, while the word “mine” burns invisibly on my skin. The silent claim leaves me with mixed emotions because I’ve never been more humiliated.
But I’ve also never felt more wanted.
After we leave the chapel,we walk down the tower stairwell and head out outside. Xavier guides me deep into the forest instead of the side entrance leading to the main foyer. I remain quiet the entire time. Although it’s been several minutes and we’re alone, I’m not confident I can talk without yelling.
The cool night air bites at my skin, but the heat of my anger keeps me warm. Xavier eventually stops and turns to face me, his gaze searching mine in the moonlight that filters through the branches. I bite the inside of my cheek, trying not to stare at his torso.
His back might be scarred, but the rest of his body is perfect. His chest, abdomen, and biceps are toned, his muscles flexing as he removes his mask. The man is a masterpiece.
And there’s his tattoos.
Xavier has several, most of them encircling his arms like sleeves, the black ink designs, intricate and detailed. I want to touch them, to trace their patterns and explore their meaning. Especially the single bird perched on a branch. No, it’s a scar, the one I gave him.
“Delilah, I know you’re pissed. I also know you like asking a million fucking questions. So, go ahead. Ask them.”
His voice has me snapping to attention, bringing my gaze to his and my anger to the forefront of my mind like a shield. “Fine. Why did you write that word on my back?”
He steps forward and grabs my chin. His lips are inches from mine, his silver gaze piercing. “I don’t want you to ever forget who you belong to. Not even for a second.” He points in the direction of the castle off in the distance. “And those motherfuckers are the kind that would try to steal you from me. It was a message to you and to them.”
Xavier knows about Eric threatening me. I’ve admitted everything else, so it’s the only logical explanation for his behavior.
“Did you like humiliating me?” I whisper.
He tightens his grip on my chin, tipping my head back until I can’t look away. “I’ll tell the truth if you do.”
“About what?”
“I want to know what Gage said to you. Word for fucking word.”
“It doesn’t matter if you end up trading me for Brenda.”
He leans closer until the tip of his nose grazes mine and his fingers dig into my skin. “If you wanted my attention, then you fucking have it. Listen, because I’m only going to say this once. I’ll never give you up. And I’ll destroy anyone who tries to take you from me. If you look to another man for something I can give you, I’ll show you just how possessive I can fucking be.”
Xavier’s expression darkens, but his eyes glint with something fierce. “Don’t try to change the subject again. What did Gage say to you? Give me a reason to rip his fucking tongue out.”
My heart is pounding so hard and fast that I’m starting to feel lightheaded. The way he says those words is so final, so sure, it scares the hell out of me. He did it once before to Frank, but I’m not worried about myself.
I don’t want anything to happen to Xavier because of me.
“I’m going to tell you the truth, but I need to know something first,” I say.
Xavier studies me, his gaze intense. Then he nods once. I take a step back and he lets his arm fall to his side.
“Okay.” I pause as my thoughts collide with one another, all of them demanding to receive answers. I settle on the most important one, the very question that started this entire thing. “Why were you at the house three years ago?”
“My father sent me to watch over Benjamin. Without any uncles or cousins, he’s the only heir to the McKenzie family.”
“So it had nothing to do with me?”
Xavier slowly shakes his head. “No.”
“Makes sense.”
Something inside me dies. I can’t explain why, but it shrivels, leaving me withering inside. Of course Xavier didn’t really want me. He killed Frank to protect Ben. I’m positive Xavier chose me as his bride just to piss off Eric. It was never about me.
He might want me now, but he didn’t in the beginning.
“Eric said he’s going to take what belongs to you, starting with me and ending with your empire,” I say. “I don’t know why you two have this rivalry going on, but from now on, leave me out of it.”
I turn around to walk away, needing to be alone and sort my thoughts into something that makes sense. Xavier moves quickly, snatching my wrist and halting my steps. He pulls me toward him until the tips of our shoes are touching.
“Where are you going?” he asks.
“I’m leaving, so I won’t punch you in the face.”
He scoffs. “If you hit me, you’d better fucking run. Because when I catch you, I’m going to fuck that attitude right out of you.”
“Are you serious?”
“Do it and find out.”
I stare at him, his beauty an illusion to his viciousness. A contradiction of hard and soft, gentle and rough. This is a game of power, his dominance over my submission.
My heart pounds, adrenaline coursing through me. Xavier doesn’t move. He merely lifts an eyebrow. That cocky expression is what sets me off.
I hit him so hard in the chin, I knock myself off balance and my knuckles crack. Or is that the sound of my bones breaking?
Holy fuckballs, that hurt.
He massages his jaw, working out the ache. His eyes narrow in warning, but I’m already sprinting, his words trailing behind me.
“Run, little raptor.”