Chapter Twenty-Nine
chapter twenty-nine
PAIGE
Shopping turns into buying ourselves new outfits, getting manis and pedis, and getting our hair done. When I text Nate to see if he wants to go to dinner tonight since I’m all dressed up with nowhere to go, he doesn’t respond, but I chalk it up to him being busy with work.
I tell myself I’ll give him until I get home to answer me, and then I’ll try to call him, but instead of going to my house, Ana insists that we go to hers to continue our girls’ day. When we pull into her driveway, there’s a bunch of cars there, but she tells me it’s because Julian has friends over to watch a basketball game.
“Isn’t it the offseason?” I ask, remembering Nate telling me that basketball doesn’t start until the end of October. He and his brothers always go to at least one Dallas home game together.
“Umm, I don’t know,” Ana says, waving me off. “Maybe it was football or golf. I can’t even keep up.”
Kira snorts out a laugh, and Ana playfully smacks her ass.
I’m so busy laughing at the two of them that I’m not paying attention when Ana opens the front door, and everyone shouts, “Surprise!”
“What the heck?” I gasp, my hands going to my chest.
“It’s your baby shower,” Ana says with a big grin.
“What?” I look around, shocked by everyone I see.
Nate’s entire family is here, including his niece and nephew. I give his mom a smile, now understanding why she told me she was out of town.
Ana’s family is here, including her dad and stepmom.
Kira’s husband, Ryder, is also here with their two little girls.
A few other colleagues from work who I’m friends with are standing there with smiles on their faces.
And then I look to the left of Nate and see…
“Dad!” I breathe, tears filling my eyes.
I’ve seen pictures of him on social media, but it’s been years since I’ve seen him in person.
“Paige,” he says, walking over to me and enveloping me in a hug that has me breaking down in sobs.
“I can’t believe you’re here.”
“You look so beautiful,” Dad says as he hugs me. “You remind me so much of your mother when she was pregnant with you.”
“I miss her so much,” I whisper. “Thank you for being here.”
“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” he says, kissing my temple and then stepping back.
I glance over and see his wife, Debbie, and their daughters.
“Thank you for coming,” I tell them, giving each of them a hug before I look around at the blue, white, tan, and green decorations filling the living room.
There’s a beautiful cake with jungle animals all over it—the same theme I showed Nate I was considering for the baby’s nursery—and tons of other goodies spread out along the tables.
“This is amazing,” I say to Ana.
“Don’t look at me,” she says. “This was all Nate’s doing. I just offered my home and to take you to breakfast so you wouldn’t be suspicious.”
I look at Nate, who’s grinning softly. “You said you were working.”
He chuckles and shakes his head. “Putting together a baby shower is hard work.”
“Thank you. This is perfect.” I lean on my tiptoes to give him a kiss and then address the room. “Thank you, everyone, for coming. This means so much to have all of you here to celebrate with us.”
The baby shower is beautiful. Everyone talks and laughs and has a good time. There’s enough food to feed an army, and after we play a few games that I’m shocked Nate found online—like pin the tail on the pregnant belly, guessing the baby’s weight, and finding who can drink the baby bottle the fastest—we cut the cake and then open presents. The day is beyond perfect, and what makes it even better is when Nate tells me that our families are in town for the rest of the weekend and we’ll be going to brunch with them tomorrow.
“I don’t know why, but seeing all this stuff makes it feel that much more real,” I tell Nate later, once we’re home and he’s unloaded the baby gifts into the guest room that I haven’t yet started to make into a nursery.
“It is real,” he says. “In a few months, you’ll be giving birth to our little boy.”
“Thank you for flying our families out,” I tell him, wrapping my arms around him. “Today was perfect. More than perfect.”
“I wish you could stay longer,” I say to Joanne as we say goodbye to them after brunch.
Since they flew over on their private jet and the guys and Valerie all need to get back to work tomorrow, they can’t stay any longer.
My dad and his family left after brunch to catch their flight with the promise to visit soon. At the very least, they’ll come to see us once the baby is born.
“I do too,” Joanne says. “But we’ll text and video, and we’ll see you soon.” She wraps her arms around me in a motherly hug and kisses my temple. “I love you, Paige. Thank you for making my son so happy.”
Once everyone has said goodbye, Nate slides his arm around me. “Ready to go home?”
“I already miss everyone.”
Nate chuckles. “I get it, but we’ll see them soon.”
“Yeah, I know,” I say with a sigh. I don’t know if it’s because I felt so high with everyone here, and now that they’re gone, it’s like I’ve crashed, but I’m suddenly feeling extremely exhausted. “I think I’m going to take a nap when we get home.”
“Everything okay?” Nate asks, concern etched in his features.
“Yeah, I think I just need to catch up on my sleep. I didn’t sleep well last night.”
When we get home, Nate insists on taking a nap with me, so after we both change out of the outfits we wore to brunch, we climb into bed, and I lay my head against his chest while he runs his fingers up and down my spine.
“Thank you for this weekend,” I tell him as my eyes start to close. “I hate that we go so long without seeing everyone.”
You wouldn’t have to go that long if you stopped being stubborn, my subconscious thinks. If you lived in Dallas, you’d only be away from one family instead of both.
“We’ll figure it out,” Nate says, leaning over and kissing the top of my head. “We have plenty of time to figure it all out.”
I wake from my nap, alone, Nate’s side of the bed empty. I don’t know how long I slept for, but when I glance out the window, it’s already dark.
Jeez, I must’ve slept all afternoon.
The time on my phone confirms it, along with the missed calls and messages since my phone was on silent. After checking and replying to everyone—Nate’s family and mine both made it home safely—I go in search of Nate, finding him in my guest room with the furniture and floor covered and a few different splotches of paint on the walls. I immediately recognize the colors as the ones I showed him I wanted to paint the nursery.
“Hey,” I say, making myself known. “Whatcha up to?”
Nate turns around and grins. “I couldn’t sleep, so I figured I’d get started on the nursery. I ran to the store and picked up samples of the colors you’d mentioned and put them on the walls so you can see which ones you like the best. One of these would be for the main walls.” He points to the samples on the left. “And one of these would be the accent wall you said you wanted. What do you think?”
I walk inside the room to give them a better look, trying to imagine the nursery in each of the colors he painted on the wall, but for some reason, none of them feel right. They’re the exact colors I showed him, but they all feel wrong now. Which makes no sense because when I looked at the bedding sets online with these colors, I could visualize the crib and the changing table on the back wall…the rocking chair in the corner.
But now, nothing feels right. And that scares the hell out of me.
“Paige,” Nate prompts, his brows pinched together in concern, “any color pop out at you?”
He looks at me, patiently waiting for an answer, but the words are stuck in my throat because nothing about this room or the colors feels right, and I don’t know what’s wrong with me. This isn’t the first time I’ve felt like this, and it only seems to be getting worse.
“I…I don’t think I’m ready to do the nursery yet,” I stammer, having no clue how to explain what’s going through my head when I don’t even know. I thought I had it all figured out, but now, it feels like my head and heart are having conflicting emotions, and everything is all garbled up.
“Is everything okay?” Nate asks, worry etched in his features.
“I don’t know,” I breathe. “I thought I wanted those colors, but now…it just…” Tears prick my eyes. “I don’t know,” I repeat, feeling like I’m about to have a panic attack, similar to the one I had yesterday while at brunch with Ana and Kira.
“Hey,” he says, pulling me into his arms. “It’s okay. We don’t have to do the nursery yet.”
He guides us out of the room and shuts the door behind him, and it’s only then I feel like I can somewhat breathe again. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me, but I think I need to do some serious soul-searching to figure it out. One thing I know for sure is that everything I thought I knew…I don’t know.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I appreciate you trying to help.”
“Stop,” he says gently, sitting on the couch and pulling me down next to him. “It’s all good. Nothing has to be done now.”
Nate wraps his arms around me, and I settle into his side, resting my head on his chest and exhaling a relieved breath. When I’m in Nate’s arms, everything else seems to fade away.
“I just found out I have to go to San Diego tomorrow to handle a few issues with a hotel expansion,” he says after a few minutes. “I was going to send Valerie, but she’s heading to Vegas.”
“How long will you be gone for?” I ask, trying not to sound disappointed at the fact that Nate is leaving.
“I’m hoping for only a few days.” He kisses my temple. “I was thinking we could have a quiet night in. How about I run you a bath to help you relax, and then I’ll order us some food?”
“That sounds perfect.”
While Nate runs the bath, I grab a drink of water, take my vitamins, and then meet him in the bathroom.
The tub is filled with bubbles, he’s lit a couple of candles, and the book I’m currently reading is sitting on the edge, waiting for me.
“I used your lavender bubbles since you said it’s the one that helps calm you,” he says while I strip out of my clothes.
“Thank you,” I tell him, overwhelmed by the patience Nate shows me.
He doesn’t get annoyed with me—ever. He simply loves me the way I am and wants me to be happy. It’s not something I’ve experienced in my previous relationships, which makes it hard to accept.
With Nate’s help, so I don’t risk slipping and falling, I step into the tub and slide down. Once I’m settled in the warm water, he gives me a quick kiss and disappears so I can relax.
I pick up my book and turn to the page I left off on, reading the first sentence, but several minutes later, I find I still haven’t gotten past that same sentence, stuck in my own thoughts, trying to figure out why I’ve felt so off lately.
I started the year feeling alone, unsure of what the future held. I was in a toxic relationship with a selfish man I should’ve broken up with months before I did.
But eight months later, I’m in a healthy relationship with someone who loves me and makes me a priority. I have an actual relationship with my dad that I didn’t think would ever happen, and I’ve gained so many friends and family—including Nate’s mom, who I absolutely adore.
Rather than spending fifty hours a week at work, I find myself wanting to be at home with Nate. I look forward to our time together, whether it’s cuddling on the couch, watching a movie, or going away for the weekend.
Spending time with our families and friends this weekend was absolute perfection. Everyone got along and the baby shower was more than I could’ve hoped or dreamed for.
For the first time, I feel like my life is full of so much good, yet I still feel off, and I can’t quite pinpoint why that is.
“You look like you’re doing the opposite of relaxing,” Nate says, snapping me out of my thoughts.
I glance up at him leaning against the doorjamb with his arms crossed casually over his chest and his brown eyes filled with love and concern, and my heart squeezes in my chest. Nate is such a good man. He’s smart and selfless. He cares about those around him, and he’s going to make such a wonderful husband and father.
“I’m just thinking,” I say, closing my book and setting it down.
Nate comes over and kneels next to me, reaching for the loofah and squirting some soap onto it. He dips it into the water and then, lifting my legs slightly, runs the loofah along my leg, starting at my shin and working his way up my thigh. He stops when he gets to the apex of my legs and starts all over again with the other leg.
As he runs the loofah up my leg, I close my eyes and lean my head back, enjoying the way he takes care of me. My body is tired, my brain is exhausted, but my heart feels so full, and I know that’s because of Nate.
“I don’t want you to go,” I admit softly as he runs the loofah over my belly. “I know you have to, but I’m going to miss you.”
Nate continues washing me, focusing on my breasts and then my neck and arms.
“I don’t want to leave either,” he admits. “I never minded traveling before, but now, I dread it.”
His movements stop, and when I open my eyes, I find him staring at me.
“I love you,” I tell him. “And I’ll be here when you get back.”
His eyes turn glassy, and he reaches up, palming the side of my face. “I love you too, Princess.”
He leans over and kisses me tenderly, his tongue licking across the seam of my lips, and I part them, giving him access. The kiss quickly becomes heated, both of us trying to show one another how much we love and want each other through our actions.
When kissing isn’t enough, Nate lifts me out of the tub and carries me over to the bed, where he makes love to me several times throughout the night, like we’re both trying to make up for the fact that he’s leaving tomorrow—only stopping long enough to eat the dinner he ordered. And it isn’t until we’re both satiated and we can barely move that he pulls me into him, and we fall asleep, skin to skin .
When I wake up in the morning, Nate’s side of the bed is empty, and I already miss him. There’s a note in his spot, and even though it doesn’t make up for him being gone, my heart hurts a little less because I know he’s going to miss me as much as I’ll miss him.
Princess,
I didn’t want to wake you since I know I wore you out last night. It was hard to leave this morning, but knowing that the quicker I get this done, the sooner I get to come home to you motivated me out of bed. Behave while I’m gone.
Love you.
Your Prince