36. Carson
CHAPTER 36
CARSON
Those words rang through my head, and I couldn’t not obey the order.
I grabbed the sides of his face, but before I shoved my cock into his throat, he said, “If I pinch your leg like this,” he demonstrated with a sharp pinch to my side. “That means stop, I’ve had enough.”
“Got it.”
“And don’t use that injured leg. Hands only.”
I nodded, wasting no time. I had to have him. I needed to fucking know what it felt like to be loved by him.
The sight of his wet, saliva-drenched, swollen lips circling my cock had me on edge, but dear fucking God. The way he sucked and licked at me as I fucked in and out of his throat set fireworks off inside me to rival the fucking 4th of July.
My nuts drew up, and the light show detonating throughout my soul migrated to the base of my spine. As much as I hated it, it all came to an end. I couldn’t hold it off.
“Rome!” I gasped softly.
His hum in response shot lightning bolts through me.
“I’m gonna, oh fuck. I’m gonna come.”
I tried pulling him off me, but he growled, swallowing me whole. The head of my dick slid into his throat, and that was it—spurt after spurt shot from me. My hearing disappeared, and my vision whited out as my balls emptied into his mouth and throat.
I pulled him off me, and a dribble rolled down his chin. I didn’t know what came over me, but I surged forward. Taking his mouth, I licked and sucked the mess I made of him from his face. The taste of me in his mouth and on his skin was so fucking hot. It made me feel some weird sense of ownership, as if I’d laid claim to him.
“You okay,” he asked as he righted my shorts and blankets.
I chuckled and said, “Yeah. Better than. What about you?”
“I’m fucking fantastic.”
“Oh, shit. Where’s the call button?”
“What? Why?”
“I think we need to have you checked out. The good doc just said fuck.”
He shook his head as laughter rumbled through him. “I think I just proved I’m not a choirboy.”
“I don’t know, the sounds you made sounded pretty fucking lyrical to me.”
He leaned over to kiss me but glanced at the door and sighed. “They’re going to be here soon for your vitals.”
I nodded, hating the need to hide. If either Roman or I were a woman, we could be together without worry. It wouldn’t matter if the door was unlocked. It wouldn’t we were caught with our pants down. There had to be something so freeing to be able to live your life truthfully and without concern that something will out you to the world, ruining everything you’d worked your whole life for.
“Kiss me first.”
“With pleasure.”
He leaned in, our lips meeting softly, and I put my hands back on his face, holding him to me. When he pulled away, he unlocked the door before returning to sit in the chair next to my bed.
He’d placed himself between me and the door, and I didn’t realize why until he threaded our fingers together. The way he sat, our entwined hands were blocked from view. I squeezed his fingers, and he smiled.
“I’ve dreamed of this day.”
Keeping my voice low, I asked, “The day you scrambled my brains with my first-ever blow job?”
“Yes, but I wasn’t being so specific. I dreamed of the day when we were together in the way I’ve always wanted us to be.”
“I dreamed of that, too. Well, kinda.”
“What do you mean?”
I sighed, scrubbed my hand over my face, then scratched my beard. It grew so fucking fast that I could shave, and it would be fully grown in within a couple of days.
“Carson?”
“Yeah, sorry. I’m trying to figure out how to word this.”
“You don’t ever need to choose your words with me, Carson.”
“And I appreciate that. It’s not so much that I’m trying to be careful how I say something, but more that I’m trying to get my thoughts in order.”
“Well, take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”
“That’s good to know. When you went off to college, I never dreamed that I wouldn’t see you for a decade.”
I tried to keep the accusatory tone out of my voice, but the wince that flashed on his face told me I failed.
“I’m sorry…” I began.
“No. Don’t apologize. I dropped you and your family like a hot potato.”
“Can I ask why?”
“Self-preservation.”
“Time for vitals, Ensign,”
Roman dropped my hand like a hot coal. I swallowed the hurt. There wasn’t anything to be done about it. I knew it wasn’t intentional. We starred at each other while the nurse went about her business, answering questions and making small talk when necessary. I tried to be polite, but truthfully, I just wanted her gone.
Then she was and I asked, “Self-preservation?”
He sighed. “Yeah. I had an inkling I was bisexual before I met you, but the day we met cemented it. I had the biggest crush on you. As the years passed, that crush turned into feelings I never dreamed would be returned. Not saying they are or they’re not, but given where we grew up and the feelings toward gay people in general back then, I buried it. When I left, I told myself to suck it up. You weren’t for me, and I spent the next five years fucking my way through men and women. Sometimes one at a time and sometimes two or more.”
“Two or more?”
Holy shit!
I knew people did shit like that. I wasn’t completely stupid when it came to sex, but… knowing strangers did it and knowing someone who did it was different altogether.
“Yes. I was a bit of a slut when I got to college, and it continued into med school. Well, until Margot.”
I huffed. “We took the exact opposite paths.”
“Everyone deals with stuff differently.”
“Yeah. I didn’t have any inkling I was gay until I met you. All my buddies and my brothers were girl crazy from like the fifth grade on. It was weird to me. I didn’t understand it at all. That part of me was dead until you came along. Then, when you left, it disappeared again.”
“So, you never…”
“I told you, I’m a virgin. I wasn’t embellishing. You were my first kiss, my first blow job. Hell, the only time I’ve ever jerked off was because of you.”
The shock on his face fed the embarrassment that had lived inside me for years at my lack of sexual experience.
“Hey. Whatever you think I’m thinking about that confession, I’d bet it’s way off base.”
“I’ve always felt broken.”
“You’re not, Carson. Not at all. Sexuality is as unique as fingerprints. We try to label it, but it’s just not possible to make something so fluid fit into a singular category. I identify as bisexual because, given the right situation with the right woman, I can feel sexually attracted to her, but it’s really men who get my engines going.”
I nodded, not wanting to think about him being with anyone else.
“I don’t even know what kind of label to smack on myself that even comes close. I guess himsexual because demisexual doesn’t quite fit because there have been so many people I’ve felt a close connection with, but there’s been no spark. Until I saw you again last summer, I had landed on impotent or asexual, but now…”
“Does the label matter to you?”
My eyes widened, and I dragged my tongue across my lips. His question took me by surprise. Was it really that simple? I looked at my hands as I pondered his question, and when I looked up at him, he was there waiting.
“No. I don’t guess it does.”
“How you identify is up to you. I’ll be happy as long as you are.”
“I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”
“Then fuck the labels.”
“I’m good with that, with two exceptions.”
“What exceptions?”
“You and Margot are mine.”
The smile that split his face was like watching the sun break the horizon
“I’m good with that as long as we can say you’re ours.”
“That’s the idea, doc.”
He stood, taking a step toward me, but stopped when the door opened.
“Ensign Wilcox.”
“Dr. Milton.”
“Dr. Ott.
“Dr. Milton.”
I wanted to roll my eyes. The doc was good, but his bedside manner sucked. I refused to go through the standoff he’d put on whenever he rounded and Roman was here. So, I headed it off by asking, “You coming in with good news or bad?”
He ignored the question and said, “You’re healing well, and the physical therapist is happy with your progress, but I’d like to keep you here longer. You’re at a high risk of embolism due to that break, and I’d like to keep you out of the air for as long as possible.”
“Okay. That’s good news.”
He did a double-take and said, “I expected some argument about having to stay.”
“Doc, I’m single. There’s no family waiting for me, and with Dr. Ott, who’s my best friend, being stationed here, it’s no skin off my nose to stay put. His mama is keeping mine updated back home so she doesn’t have to feel bad about staying put.”
“Good.”
“Since I’m going to be hanging out for a bit, how about letting me out of this bed for more than a short walk down the hall and back?”
Dr. Milton hesitated, but Roman didn’t. “That leg isn’t ready for that, Carson. Not yet. Not if you want to operate again.”
Dr. Milton sighed, then said, “Your friend is right. You’d do well to listen to him.”
“Fine. I guess I’ll stay put.”
Dr. Milton left after reviewing the changes he would be making to my rehab with the physical therapist.
“What were you thinking asking if you could leave the hospital? You’re nowhere near ready for that yet.”
I looked at him, a smirk tugging at my lips. “I was thinking about returning the favor and maybe doing what you whispered about earlier.”
Roman’s eyes turned dark and smoldering. “Well, I’m happy to go another round.”
“Oh no, doc. Not until I get my chance. I’m not that selfish.”
“It might be a bit…
“Hmm, I’ve got an idea. When’s that blasted nurse due to pester me again?”
“I’m almost scared to ask what the idea is, but you’ve got a bit before they come back.”
“Go lock that door.”
“It’s going to get suspicious if your door is always locked.”
“Tell them I’m shy and don’t want people in here when I take a shit.”
“Jesus, I forget how crude you can be sometimes.”
“Oh right, when I’m using the facilities. Better?”
“Much. Okay, so I’m locking the door, and then what?”
“You’ll see.”
Roman walked to the door, flipping the lock. I cranked the television volume up a couple of notches as I wiggled my basketball shorts down enough to pull my good leg out of them.
When Roman turned back to me, I had my cock in hand. The dry, calloused grip tugged at my shaft as I jerked it slowly.
“Holy hell, that’s hot,” Roman said, his eyes glued to the slow movements of my hand.
“C’mere.”
“Gladly.”
When he was close enough, I gripped his trousers, pulling him closer to me. His face flushed as his chest rose and fell with soft, short pants.
“Drop the rail and open your pants. I want a taste.”
Without a word, he did as I asked while I lowered the head of the hospital bed. His cock popped free. The tip glistened in the light as he tucked his pants and boxer briefs under his balls—his shaved balls.
My tongue darted out when the smell of his precum filled my senses.
“Fucking hell,” I groaned. “Just the smell of you…”
Leaning forward, I dragged my tongue up his shaft from base to tip before sucking it into my mouth. I had no damn idea how to do this, and I told him so.
“You need to tell me what you like because I don’t know…”
“You’ve never failed at anything you put your mind to. I don’t think your mouth is going to let us down now.”
Taking a cue from what he’d done earlier, I licked and sucked and swallowed around him. I tried my damnedest to keep my teeth out of the way, but the first time they dragged over the mushroom head of his dick, I quit being so gentle.
“Carson. Damn, babe, your mouth…”
I hummed around him, and he gasped, “Stop.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
“Dear God, no. I need to taste you.”
“But…”
“Roll onto your back.”
I did as he asked, and he climbed onto the bed, straddling my face. His leaking cock dripped onto my face as it hung above me. I licked the fluid bubbling from his tip and thrust up into his mouth when he swallowed me down.
“You have to stay still,” he admonished.
“That’s easier said than done.”
“SEALs are supposed to have discipline and willpower. Now, prove it.”
He gobbled my cock down, and I got lost in sensation for a moment. I knew I didn’t have any experience, but this man made me lose my mind. He robbed me of all thought. Determination filled me, and I swallowed him as far as I could, gagging and choking on him as he thrust in and out of my mouth. I echoed every move and action he made.
A ball of tingling need gathered at the base of my spine. I’d been on the verge before he sucked my dick down his throat. I moaned around his dick, fighting to hold off until he shot. I needed him to come first.
Bringing a hand up to encircle the length of him I couldn’t fit in my mouth, I gripped him tight, working him as he lost his rhythm.
I almost had him. I was sure of it.
Then he popped off my cock. So, I redoubled my efforts, but the man had tricks up his sleeve I didn’t. He pressed a finger against my asshole, tapping at my opening slowly.
Once.
Twice.
That was it. I lost it. Completely. The orgasm I’d been fighting rolled through me. Luckily, he had his cock shoved down my throat; otherwise, I’d have screamed down the walls.
“Sweet hell,” Roman grunted as he flooded my mouth.
I swallowed. The bitter, salty taste was a surprise. Not a bad one, but unexpected.
He collapsed next to me, falling over onto his back.
Chuckling, he said, “Jesus Christ, you’re going to be the death of me.”
He sat up and tucked himself back into his pants and moved to face me. Raising the head of the bed, his mouth captured mine in a quick kiss when I was upright.
I hated that I finished before him, and I said so. “Sorry for getting off so quickly.”
“Don’t be. I love that I get you so riled up that you can’t hold off. For someone so new to what we’ve done, you’re a fucking genius. I have no complaints.”
My skepticism must’ve shown on my face because he grabbed my face in his hands and said, “Stop. It’s you I want. However, you come.”
The twelve-year-old that lived inside burst out laughing. Roman did as well but continued despite the laughs. “Carson, I’ve dreamed of being with you since middle school. I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I’m going to grab the bull by the horns and hold the hell on for whatever ride I get.”
I nodded, still concerned. I had no fucking clue what I was doing when we were together. In every other aspect of my life, I was confident, in control, and knew what the fuck I was doing. I should’ve watched more porn.
“I don’t know. I like the idea of teaching you all the ins and outs.”
“What?”
“You mentioned porn, and I said I like the idea of you learning from me.”
“Fuck. I said that out loud?”
“Yes, you did.”
I groaned and fell back against the bed while he laughed at me. I scrubbed my hands over my face.
“I don’t know why you’re so upset. It’s not like I haven’t tutored you before.”
“Jesus fucking Christ. I’m not sixteen anymore,” I groaned.
“Oh, trust me. I know how old you are. The years have been very, very good to you and, in return, to me.”
I rolled my eyes. Our birthdays were only six months apart. He’d only been a year ahead of me in school because of how late mine fell in the year. I couldn’t help but preen a bit, though. Especially after laying eyes on the dipshit doctor that looked like a fucking Greek god.