What did you do? (Infatuated fae #2)

9. Present Day

9

PRESENT DAY

Caly

“ T hey’re scissors.”

“Yes, Eli, I know they are scissors,” I said with an eye roll. “Why are you holding them to me like that? Where did those even come from?” I asked with a nervous laugh. He looked as if he were scheming.

He stood in front of me with the bright light of the unfamiliar castle glinting off of the office supply in his hand. The sharp tips pointed at me as my focus shifted slightly over his shoulder to see Queen Saracen smiling from the hallway.

Eli’s face suddenly looked pained as he reached out to me. His warm fingers gently skated across the back of my neck. Tachycardia overtook me, propelling my broken heart at least 120 beats per minute. I shifted nervously, my eyes volleying between the scissors and his handsome face.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

Time froze. I flinched a little when he dominantly stepped into me, holding the back of my neck firm. A creak of scissors opening. What was he doing? What was happening?

“You have a tag still on your dress,” he whispered. His searching eyes slowly ran over my face. “Hold still, it just looks like we’re talking,” he whispered with a wink, slowly moving his hand down the back of my neck until his fingertips caressed the T1 nerve of my thoracic vertebrae, causing a shiver to vibrate across my skin. “There, you’re good. I don’t think anyone saw it,” he said with a sneaky grin as he handed me the stiff, barcoded price tag from my new dress.

Eli winked, and his eyes roamed my face slowly before he stepped away and returned the scissors to a filigreed cup on a stand by a giant vase of fresh flowers.

“Chef, return to the kitchen. Bring Caly that special tea in the cabinet please,” she snapped in Samuel’s direction before spinning to walk off.

Eli and Samuel immediately caught each other’s gazes. Nothing was spoken, but I couldn’t help feeling a lot was being said by the odd look they shared. Samuel nodded once to Eli.

“Yes, immediately, Your Highness,” the old man said softly with a look in my direction.

“You can’t drink the tea,” Eli whispered softly.

“Why not?” I whispered back.

“Because I don’t want you to. You won’t be able to handle it,” he said sternly.

Immediately, stubborn fire poured through my veins. I knew faerie food acted differently on humans, but I was strong. I could take it. “And just how would you know what I can and cannot handle? Because I’m human? It’s tea.” I scowled back at him.

“No, Cal, it’s?—”

“Make yourselves useful and bring us tea and cold cuts. You may gawk at the poor human whilst you serve her,” Saracen snapped in the direction of a group of servants that had huddled nearby.

I may as well have been an animal at the zoo by the way they all clamored to get a better look at me as I passed by. Eli let out a loud, dramatic breath as he touched my elbow to gently guide me through the castle.

The queen had just made her way into a sitting room, leaving them free to whisper and stare at me as they liked. For the first time in a really long time, I felt weak and self-conscious.

“Leave now,” Eli commanded in a tone I had never heard him use.

A little startled at his tone, my head whipped around to look at him.

The crowd scattered in a frenzy. Eli looked down to give me a wink and smile, instantly transforming back into the charming, fun boy I used to play in the fields with. He paused at the doorframe a moment to let me enter the room before him.

His mother sat on a small, Victorian-style sofa in the center of the grand room. Intricate molding and chandeliers seemed to be in every spot my eyes landed. A tingle in my nose made me sniff abruptly. It smelled sharp and clean—the kind of clean that stings your nose.

Thump, thump, thump.

My heart pounded unusually hard. Was that because it was near its other half?

“Caly, my dear, please sit. Chef will be here momentarily with your tea. You must drink it quickly before it gets cold, that is one thing I specifically remember the apothecary saying. Sit, sit,” the queen playfully scolded as she waved a hand, indicating the spot next to her on the clean, delicate-looking sofa.

I should have changed my clothes.

I felt disgusting in my dirt-speckled sundress sitting next to her. Why could I not seem to keep my clothes clean? Ever? Even fresh, new ones? Somehow I had managed to ruin my pretty dress on the way here.

Not a pale-blond hair was out of place on Saracen’s beautiful head, and a small, modest crown of citrines caught the chandelier light, sparkling atop it. I glanced at my feet the second her eyes caught me staring.

I needed to get it together.

“I just collected Caly, Mother. She has been traveling all day and has hardly had a moment of relaxation since she was in Unseelie—” Eli began, but was quickly cut off by Saracen.

“Is he truly dead, Calypso? Is that vile blotch of a disease finally dead?” she asked, leaning her angelic face closer to mine.

Her warm, polychromatic eyes danced, alive and excited. The reflection of the fire in front of us reflected eerily as it filled her irises, adding a strangely sinister edge to her question.

The words lodged in my throat, cold and hard, but I reluctantly forced them out. “Mendax, prince of the Unseelie realm, is—is dead,” I said as confidently as was possible with a lump clogging my throat.

As soon as I spoke, a shiver trickled down my spine like phantom fingers raking over my skin.

“I had heard as much, but I wished to hear it from your lips, Calypso. It’s quite the accomplishment, even for a skilled woman such as yourself.” Saracen squeezed my forearm kindly. “You know what it would mean to the Seelie court, to me, if you had not been capable of killing him…and you were bonded to him.” She clenched her jaw, and a cold look hardened her typically warm features.

“She fought against the bonding, Mother. It was against her will. I was there.” Eli rose from his chair to defend me.

“Yes, of course. I would never betray you, Saracen…or Seelie,” I stated, quite surprised. It felt foreign and sour for her to doubt me. She had never even questioned me after other hits, other than to ask if it was completed. “I-I have done everything you have asked of me,” I said, beginning to feel defensive. “Every mark you have given me in the human realm, I have killed without so much as a question. Mendax was no different,” I replied. “I have ached for this day for as far back as I can remember. The day I could be here—that we could all be together. You are my family. I would do—I have done—anything for you!”

Careful , I warned myself.

I glanced at Eli as he hovered by the door, letting Chef carry in a small tray with a single teacup. “Though I am anxious to have my heart restored, I would have given all of it as proof of my undying allegiance, had it been so requested, Saracen.”

“ Queen Saracen,” Samuel interjected harshly.

My eyes snapped to him. The older man was setting the tray on the table near my side of the sofa. He gave me a tight-lipped smile and left, pausing only to take the tray from the servants who had just arrived with a separate tea for Eli and Saracen.

One more remark like that from him and there would be a kitchen fire soon.

“Drink your tea, dear. Tell me about your time in the Unseelie palace. What is that gloomy old bat Tenebris up to now? What a horrid time I imagine her to be having with her only heir dead. Right under her rigid nose too.” A glassy, pleased look tightened the corners of her eyes and pulled at the corners of her lips.

Whoa. I knew they hated each other, but this felt like something deeper than what little information I had. The Unseelie must have hurt Saracen horribly.

The hairs on my forearms rose, and there was a rush of adrenaline in my system.

Nerves. It’s just nerves.

Thump, thump. My heart pounded like a timpani. Why did I suddenly feel so sick? I grabbed my teacup and took a drink, hoping to calm myself.

“The tea is wonderful. Thank you,” I murmured, locking eyes with Eli.

Cinnamon, but what else was in it? I knew it but couldn’t put my finger on it. Strong but surprisingly calming.

Within seconds though, every part of my body was humming. My foot began tapping on the floor, attempting to release the sudden fuzziness.

Fuck. Was this because it was faerie tea and I was a human? Why couldn’t I remember what Eli had told me it did to humans? Saracen no doubt hadn’t thought I would have a reaction.

All of my senses felt tense and overwhelmed. The obnoxiously bright gold-and-white room, the pungent scent of floor polish, even the closeness to Saracen and Eli were suddenly too much.

“Yes, dear, drink up. Aurelius, for sun’s sake, open the flue. Smoke is pouring in. Incompetent staff, honestly! We can’t even have a proper fire.”

“Yes, Mother,” muttered Eli as he dutifully moved to the large marble fireplace.

“After tea we will sort out all of that heart business, Caly. Aurelius tells me that the Unseelie prince was intensely fond of you. Obviously so, if you got him to bond with you. I can’t help but find it quite odd though. It is absolutely unheard of for that psychotic fae.” She tilted her head to the side slightly. “Such a shame that their bonded do not receive the Smoke Slayers powers until after the wedding ceremony. You truly could have had it all,” she laughed. “You would have been quite the force, my dear. Could you imagine? Had I even thought you could affect him that strongly, I—for the love of sun! Aurelius, what is the matter with the fire?” the queen shouted as she waved her dainty hand in front of her face, pushing a haze of smoke away.

My teacup’s smooth edge grazed the bottom of my lip as I prepared to take a drink when the cause of the scentless smoke dawned on me, and I froze.

The queen’s mouth dropped open, her wide eyes locked on my forearms. Petrified, I watched as Saracen’s teacup fell to the floor, accompanied by the sharp sound of porcelain shattering into a million pieces. The queen stood, covering her mouth with trembling hands and hurriedly stepping away from me to move her frightened eyes over my still figure.

“Mother, the fire is absolutely fi—” Eli turned and froze. “Oh, suns.”

“What is it?” I scanned the empty space behind me, praying a threat loomed behind me—a threat I knew wouldn’t be there.

The light trails of smoke filtering through my clothes and across my bare arms grew thicker. I hadn’t even felt it this time. Was I already so comfortable keeping part of his powers?

My body was producing enough smoke now that a small black cloud hovered where I had sat only a moment prior. I took in a deep breath, searching for the familiar smoky, masculine scent of pine and cardamom to comfort me, but this time I smelled nothing. Not even a hint of charcoal burning, like I’d smelled so many times at the picnic areas at the state park, and it most certainly was not the incredibly seductive, smoky fragrance I’d smelled before.

How incredibly odd.

“It can’t be! How can this be?” Saracen cried as she clutched at her son.

My heart thundered so fast, it felt painful as it flooded my ears. How could this happen now? I had just gotten to where my family was. I wasn’t even a Seelie royal yet! I’d thought I’d be able to spend a little more time with Eli, but if Saracen tried to kick me out for having her enemy’s powers in my veins—or worse—then I would have to make my moves sooner. I needed to stay. I couldn’t let everything come undone now.

Thump, thump, thump.

“Please, Saracen,” I said, hurling myself to the hard marble floor at her feet. “ Please! It’s just residual from the bond. It will leave as soon as my heart is put together again. Please , please , I’m begging you. We agreed you’d make me a royal!” I cried as I clutched her skirts.

“Some of his powers have fastened to you…even with the lack of a wedding ceremony and his death.” She looked at Eli, seemingly dumbfounded. Her wide eyes just stared for a moment before she collected herself and hauled me up to stand barely an inch from her face, startling me with her closeness.

Lines of smoke traced the outline of her body. Every part of me trembled, waiting to hear her tell me to leave.

“How is it possible that his powers still live while he is dead ? Unless you have absorbed some of his powers through your own.”

Her sunset eyes narrowed, searching mine for the tiniest flicker of falsity. I fought desperately to will the tendrils that still flowed to cease. I didn’t like her this close.

The ball of my foot dragged over the floor as I attempted to take a step back and give myself some space. This was all too much. The weight of her gaze felt like it would crush me. Every second, it was harder and harder to not run into Eli’s arms and cry.

“It’s unusual. Something about her must have caused the powers to hold.” Eli’s jaw flexed.

He and his mother locked eyes in a silent conversation.

“I’m certain it’s because of the magic that you used to keep me alive with half of a heart, or maybe a reaction to the Seelie gift of animal companionship you blessed me with,” I broke in, beads of sweat gliding down my forehead, glancing nervously at Eli.

“He already knows. Tarani does as well,” Saracen stated.

“You told them?” I said, my anger rising.

“Only the basics. They can fill you in later.” Her eyes held mine a moment too long.

I needed to know how much they knew.

“Calypso’s powers may have neutralized a bit of his,” she said to Aurelius.

I glared at her. She was going to wreck everything for me.

“Oh, the cat’s out of the bag now that you’re back from Unseelie,” she chuckled. “No one would have believed you were human and returned alive as it was.”

Tell her I just needed to be inside of you in one way or another, pet.

A scream ripped free from my throat as I fell over the small love seat, tipping it and myself to the ground.

No.

No!

What the fuck?

What. The. Fuck?

The voice in my mind was the same gravelly voice I had heard during the trials when Mendax had spoken to me through the bond.

My entire body trembled, making it impossible to get up.

No.

He couldn’t talk through the bond anymore.

He was dead.

It was my subconscious talking. I had thought that.

Flashes of Mendax’s face appeared in my mind—the look of shock and appreciation that creased the corners of his cold blue eyes when I had stabbed him.

I swear I could feel him laughing at me from his grave now.

God, I’m exhausted.

“Cal! What is it?” Eli helped me up, alarm and worry filling his voice.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

“I-I—” My head was shaking. Trembling. I gawked at him, unable to find the right words. “I thought I—I thought I heard something, and it scared me. I-I’m just tired,” I said, reaching out to squeeze the tanned arm of the kind fae.

“Mother, she needs to go to bed. Look at her?—”

“Nonsense. There’re things we need to decide now that everything is out in the open. Tarani, I know you are listening outside. Stop being so troublesome and take Calypso on a tour. Eli and I will join the two of you shortly. We have something of importance to discuss.”

I had finally calmed myself—at least enough to appear unaffected—as Eli’s sister reluctantly showed me a few rooms, side-eyeing me the entire time. Her glare felt like knife points piercing the back of my head when I walked in front of her.

I had never met the princess before today. Queen Saracen and Eli were the only two who had ever visited me. But I didn’t need to know her to realize she was upset with me being here.

The moment we were out of earshot of the others, she confirmed as much. “You don’t deserve him,” she bit out coldly.

She was right. I didn’t.

We both continued to stare straight ahead. Her outburst hadn’t surprised me. She was used to getting everything she wanted, including all of her brother’s attention. I would bet what little money I had that she had never been told no. She was as spoiled and pampered as they came. They both were.

I bit down on my lip hard, nearly running into a door in shock as the sensation forced my eyes shut and sent tingles of pleasure deep down into my belly.

Mhhmmm.…

Was that me?

My chest filled with three deep, belly-expanding breaths before I dared continue.

Okay then…

Anyway, Eli had been Tarani’s best friend, and she’d had him entirely to herself forever. I didn’t blame her one bit for hating me. In fact, I respected it.

“I know I don’t,” I returned.

She glanced at me, hate filling her yellow irises, and for the first time since I was in the Unseelie realm, I was genuinely uneasy.

Maybe she hated me because I was a fae killer. I couldn’t help but wonder if she knew the work I had done for her mother in the human realm as well. Did they tell her I lured fae in with smiles and charm, and killed them simply because her mother had told me to? Did she know that most of the time I didn’t even know what crimes they had committed to deserve death? That I didn’t care? I was given an order and I carried it out. Every time. And I enjoyed it.

It was all so I could get here and finally be with my family again.

Anyone who ever tells you they wouldn’t kill for that is a liar.

The princess barked at me to follow her, guiding me to yet another large, opulent room. Her flowing, white dress trailed behind her, reminding me of sheets on a clothesline, flapping in the wind. She was so young and vibrant. Not tarnished and broken like me.

I choked the memories down as I continued to follow her. Things were going to be amazing from now on.

This room was different. I could feel the shift in the air immediately when we stepped inside. It felt…permanent. Powerful. The ceilings seemed to grow before my eyes with painted Rubenesque figures. They looked to be in a battle of sorts, but it was unclear who sided with whom. When my eyes touched them, the characters snapped their heads to watch me with hauntingly intense and empty, black eyes. Some wore all gold, holding what looked like handfuls of light, while others were cloaked in dark grays and browns. I took note of several slightly pointed ears in the battle scene…but then, I also noticed some with rounded, human-looking ears.

They looked horrifying.

A poor attempt at humans from a fae painter, I supposed. Their faces were empty and gaunt, soulless but for the eyes that seemed to stare straight through me. They reminded me more of zombies than humans. Especially in contrast to the godlike figures in gold. They seemed to be on the same side of the battle as the fae in gold, several even kneeling at their feet.

Tarani pushed me, and my perusal of the mural ended. I could still see them look at me in my peripheral vision, creepy grins on their faces and all.

I really had a lot of adjusting to do in the fae realm. Human science didn’t apply here.

In the back of the room, two large thrones loomed on a short platform. One seemed slightly more feminine than the other, encrusted with citrine set deep into the glistening gold. The other bore no gems or glittery accoutrements; instead, it was adorned with a regal fox head carved intricately on both of its tall back posts. The room was almost entirely bare, with the large, white-cushioned thrones the obvious focal point. It felt wrong and oddly dangerous to be standing in this room. The heavy, suffocating air even advised me to leave.

“This is obviously the royal throne room,” Tarani said, gazing at the throne to the left with a hard-set jaw. Did the queen and princess get along? They were close from the small amount Eli had said.

“It’s beautiful,” I mumbled, uncertain of what else to say. She seemed a little more excited in this room, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling we shouldn’t be here. Maybe she was hoping to get me into trouble. It seemed like something she would do.

“The fox heads are very impressive.” I smiled, nodding at the second throne. I’d never met King Felix, but from the small amount Eli had told me, he had been a truly kind and loving father.

“Yes.” Tarani’s face dropped.

“I’m sorry,” I said, trying to backtrack.

“No, you’re right. It is a beautiful throne. The fox heads were designed to look like my father in his shifted form.” She stepped closer to the throne, transfixed by the wooden heads. “I wish he were here. He could have fixed this,” she said with a wave.

Tarani turned back to face me, tears brimming her eyes. She reminded me of a fisher cat—small and innocent looking but ready to rip the flesh off my bones.

“How long has he?—”

Tarani cut me off. “Since that horrible woman murdered him.”

I looked at her, shocked, but remained silent.

She looked up to the ceiling, a tear overflowing and swimming down the side of her tanned nose.

I craned my neck to focus on where her angry eyes had landed. More of the classically painted mural encompassed the ceiling. I could see the figures swathed in dark much clearer on the ceiling. Among the darkened areas were large, shadowy-looking figures. Maybe five or so of these ominous shadow monsters fought against the figures in gold. A few wore the familiar billowing, white robes with gold vines artistically draped across their bodies—the Seelie.

My eyes were still captivated by the hazy shadows.

They were terrifying.

The soft tap-click-tap of footsteps preceded Eli and the queen as they entered the echoing room, still speaking heatedly to one another.

“Queen Tenebris is the only known Smoke Slayer alive…for now,” the queen stated icily. “It’s quite likely she has something to do with this. I’m unsure as to why, but it doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done. We must act accordingly.”

The murmurs of Eli’s deep voice grew closer. “Mother, that is not how she wants to become a Seelie royal. You know I will never allow you to hurt her, and I refuse to let you banish her from me again.” Eli’s pinned wings twitched ever so slightly, either from fear or anger.

“Banish her?” Saracen shouted in a shrill tone. “Banish her? Darling, how can you not see what a gift we have been blessed with? With Langmure dead, you are the heir to the throne. I can hardly imagine a more powerful duo than a SunTamer and an Artemi. Our dear Calypso, so suddenly left with such overwhelming powers—no matter how little of his powers she now possesses, retaining even a tenth of that fae’s power is more than most of the elevated fae put together. Once her heart is returned, her Artemi powers should be fully restored. Do you know what that would do for Seelie? The depths which we could reach with that type of power?”

Eli shifted uneasily, glancing nervously at me as they came to a halt in front of us. “You want me to marry Cal…because she has some of his powers?” His lip curled, and he let out a small animalistic sound, instantly moving closer to me.

It was so foreign to see anyone move to defend me. My chest squeezed at Eli’s movements. I knew it wasn’t practical and I knew it wasn’t intelligent, but I leaned into the comfort of being the helpless one for one singular second.

I had been strong for so long.

“She will have her own powers as well. Powers greater than you children have ever witnessed. The Artemi went extinct long before you were alive to witness them. You think Chef Samuel is the only one who knows how long you’ve been in love with the girl?” the queen chided Eli playfully, casting a wink in my direction.

A blush burned my face. “When will you empower me as an official Seelie?” I cut in.

“Calypso is one of our own. She is family, and we don’t just leave our family in danger, unprotected.” The queen’s voice softened as her eyes danced between Eli and Tarani.

I focused on my breathing.

Her satiny voice grew louder. “It is no secret that the Smoke Slayers are among the most dangerous, albeit sublimely powerful, creatures the Fates ever created. Besides the Artemi and the old gods, there has never been such power. Imagine a realm, no, a family , that possessed the Smoke Slayer, Artemi, and SunTamer abilities?” She paused, her warm eyes beginning to widen dreamily. “Imagine the bloodline they could create. They would have rights to both the Seelie and Unseelie crown, and quite frankly, anything else they wanted. There could hardly be a more advantageous marriage, and it’s no surprise you two are in love. I knew the moment Aurelius laid eyes on you that the two of you would one day be together.” Her smile was so wide, it nearly closed her eyes.

Princess Tarani shrieked. “You cannot be serious, Mother! She can’t take the crown. Eli doesn’t need her to rule! No one”—she snapped her head to me—“and I do mean no one cares about him more than myself. She will hurt him! How can you even trust her? She’s a liar and a fae killer by profession!” The small princess snarled at her mother. “Imagine what she’ll do once she has her full powers!”

She wasn’t wrong.

A haze of black smoke once again danced down my arms and rolled onto the marble floor.

“She’s a liar and a very skilled fae killer because I trained her to be. Well, technically Commander Von trained her, but that’s semantics. She has gifted us with half an organ in a show of loyalty, Tarani. What have you given us?” Saracen retorted. “And, darling, it might behoove you to remember just how proficient she is at her particular set of skills.”

Tarani glared at me.

“I don’t want to marry Eli,” I said, looking between all of their faces. What was happening? How was my plan turning to shit every five minutes when I’d had it since I was eight?

Eli scoffed at his mother. “Calypso is my best friend. She doesn’t want to marry me, and Tarani is right, I don’t need Caly to rule. You’re talking nonsense. And furthermore, if I’m not enough for the throne alone, then maybe Tarani should take the crown. She is more capable than me anyway.”

The queen gave a short laugh as she stared at Tarani. “Your sister couldn’t lead a blazing lindwurm into a fire filled with offerings,” she chuckled.

Tarani gasped. “No one could! Blazing lindwurms are obstinate and uncontrollable!”

What in the fae world was a blazing lindwurm? I shook away my thoughts. “I-I was painfully unaware a marriage was an assumed part of our deal,” I said.

“Okay, fine, then. I suppose a marriage isn’t necessary for you to be impregnated,” the queen suggested.

“What? Oh, god no! I thought you’d be upset at what’s inside of me now,” I said, grabbing my pounding head. “Instead, you want Aurelius and I to—to make a baby?” Was there a possibility I was still in the hospital with brain damage?

I would never marry Eli for a position as a Seelie royal. Of all the people in the world, he was the only one I cared about not hurting.

Eli’s sharp eyes snapped to mine, his light-brown eyebrows so high they nearly blended into his hairline.

“It’s as if the old gods have rewarded us for the horrors we Seelie have endured,” Saracen said, tilting her chin up slightly.

She moved with a smile as she grabbed both mine and Eli’s shoulders like a football coach about to share a play, lightly pushing Tarani out of the way in the process. Her touch sent a truly odd sensation of excitement down my arms and up my neck.

“Aurelius, you will marry Calypso, solidifying her as a Seelie royal. We will then claim the Unseelie throne, as Calypso still carries rank as partial Smoke Slayer. Aurelius will likewise take the Seelie throne as king, thus combining the realms under our control.”

Fuck!

Eli and I both recoiled slightly as we looked at each other with wide eyes. Rage bubbled in the back of my mind, but it felt different, out of place even, next to the fear I was really feeling.

“No. I will be empowered as a Seelie royal once my heart is restored. That was the agreement,” I snapped angrily.

Everyone’s eyes snapped to me, taken aback by my angry tone.

Fuck. I was ruining this.

Eli jumped in. “Hello, Calypso! So lovely to have you in Seelie with us. Would you like a tour? Perhaps some weird tea? Oh, gee, look at that, you have the devil’s powers! Let me force you into an arranged marriage with my son!” Eli said sarcastically. “She is a person, Mother. She is special without this horrible smoke and not a tool to level you up. I haven’t even seen her in some ten years! Nothing more than letters since she was eighteen and you barred my entry.”

In the few minutes since Eli had arrived, my last bit of smoke had settled, aside from a few small, translucent tendrils from my fingertips.

“You and I both know, as a SunTamer, you were always going to have an arranged marriage. Would this not suit you more? I could think of worse pairings than your best friend, Aurelius. Especially when she looks as yours does.” The queen winked at me with a laugh.

“I’m sorry and I mean no offense, Saracen. You have done so much for me, but I will not be marrying anyone. I am not a prized heifer at the auction house. Eli should take the throne and find another bride of his choosing.” Why did the thought of him marrying someone suddenly sting? “The Smoke Slayer effects—I would hardly call them powers, as fogging up a room seems the most I am capable of—will all go away once I collect the remaining half of my heart. I’m certain of it. Which—that will be soon, right?” I held the queen’s gaze and my own breath.

I was so close. So close to being whole again.

Saracen matched my stare for a beat before answering with a smile that didn’t meet her eyes. “Yes, of course. We will host a ceremony, allowing me to return your heart properly and for all of Seelie to recognize your allegiance and witness your title change.” Her soft voice dropped. “Once your heart is fully restored and whole, we will provoke you.”

“ Provoke me?”

That could be a big problem. Thoughts of how Saracen would provoke me until I used my powers caused a worried shiver to slither down my spine.

“If you show any sign of the Smoke Slayer powers after the return of your heart, then you will be married to Aurelius in front of everyone.” Saracen’s eyes sparkled. “Unfortunately, the Seelie realm has no place for such a powerful Artemi as a wielder of dark magic, unless you are to become a part of the monarchy. The Artemi are far too dangerous to be independent from a royal court. Their ability to absorb another’s powers and leave them a powerless mortal is unforgiveable in the eyes of all fae, and that is only one of your gifts.” She paused, as if challenging us to interrupt, but no one dared, not even Tarani. “If, as you so confidently claim, the Smoke Slayer powers are nonexistent after rejoining your heart, then you will continue to live under our roof as an associate of the royal family with our full protection. I hope you understand I’m doing you a grand favor with this deal.” She removed her grip on our shoulders with a beautiful smile.

“But…that wasn’t the deal! I need to be a Seelie royal, not an associate!” I yelled.

Everyone looked at me, but no one spoke.

Eli’s eyes were like a closed book—filled with untold stories. My eyes snagged on his soft-looking lip. I wanted to bite it—badly.

The fuck was happening today?!

A very low growling sound reverberated from somewhere.

I rubbed my arms, shaking away the goose bumps that had suddenly covered my body.

“Aurelius, darling, take the poor girl’s bag and show her to her room in the east wing. She must be exhausted, and I’m sure you two have a lot of…catching up to do.”

Saracen smiled coyly, looping her arm around Tarani’s shoulders before the princess pulled away and stomped toward the door ahead of her mother. The queen paused for a moment to glance back to where Eli and I remained, staring at each other as if we were strangers.

“Actually, I’ve changed my mind, Aurelius. Take her things to the north wing. You two will have the entire section to yourselves. Calypso, I’d like to meet with you in the gardens tomorrow evening to discuss a few things,” she sang, slyly smiling at us before following Tarani out the doors.

Eli and I remained. The large throne room was so quiet now, I could have heard a pin drop. Why was my heart racing? Had I moved closer to him, or did he just move closer to me?

“Cal, are you all right? I’m so sorry. I had no idea she would be like this. I would have hidden you until we could get your smoke stuff under control had I known.”

“You’re a pushover,” I snorted, suddenly feeling loose-lipped. My emotions were like a roller coaster.

His eyes creased with laughter. “I’m a pushover?”

“Yes, and I think maybe a little weak also,” I said quite seriously. I felt like I had so much to tell him.

He chuckled, surprising me, not at all offended that I’d just called him a weak pushover. “And what have I done to deserve the prestigious title of an unappealing pushover?” He smiled, leaning in a little closer.

Why couldn’t I stop looking at his mouth? There was serious shit happening right now. “You’re enticing,” I whispered. What?

“What?” His own volume lowered.

“ Unappealing wasn’t in the title I gave you. Weak was.” I bit my lip hard to stop from biting his. Fuzzy, mind-numbing tingles rippled down between my legs.

He filled his hard chest with air, lifting my hands. When had I touched him? What was I doing?

“You should know better than anyone, looks usually only tell what you want them to.” His breath skated across my closed eyelids.

I needed to be touched. Now. I knew it wasn’t normal, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t think straight. Couldn’t even remember why I was standing in this room with the moving mural.

Eli cleared his throat roughly. “Tea, one; Calypso, zero. You need rest. Come on. You’ll remember everything tomorrow, so don’t be weird. Also, don’t worry about Mother.”

I followed Eli out and down another long corridor. I needed to map the castle, but my mind was spinning, and something in my stomach didn’t feel right.

My body had begun humming when Saracen had touched my shoulder. Even then, I had been forced to bite my tongue in an effort not to say the most random, malicious things to her.

His voice faltered a second before he spoke again. “Is it that repulsive to think about marrying me?” Eli laughed.

The truth was, there was a time I would have killed to marry him. I think at one point, I basically thought I was.

It seemed like a good idea to tell him that now, so I opened my mouth to speak just as he reached over and squeezed my hand. Immediately all words left my brain, stopped by the way his large hand felt on my vibrating skin.

I wanted to clench my thighs together at the thought of those hands other places, but we continued to walk. The room felt fuzzy, and tracers had started up in my vision if I moved my head too fast. I couldn’t seem to think about anything other than how much I needed to be touched.

“Have you ever thought about what you’d feel like inside of me?” I blurted.

Eli coughed and choked next to me.

“It’s just that—” But Eli had stopped helping me stand, and I stumbled onto the ground, hitting my shoulder with a thud.

“What in the suns?” Eli mumbled, trying to help me up.

“Do you know I can kill you, even from down here?” I laughed.

“Well, isn’t that an alarming thing to giggle about,” he said, fighting a smile.

I couldn’t seem to get my bearings with the heat of his body so close to mine. Instead, I ended up pulling his shirt loose from where it tucked into his pants and running my palms up his warm skin. I raked my fingernails down over the ridges of his stomach.

“Ouch!” he said, giving me a shocked look.

“I’ve always wondered what your abs would feel like. They are so hard. Where else are you hard?” I rasped, running my palm over his crotch.

Fuuuuuck.

I gasped in surprise. “Has bestie always had this package?” I smiled, reaching for more, but his hands grabbed my wrists and pulled them away.

I moaned at his hold on my wrists.

“Oh my Fates! She gave you fairy mead!” Eli said with a cackle. “To bed with you immediately, you lush.”

I lost the fight to stand up again, and Eli didn’t hesitate to scoop me into his arms. My head spun under the bright lights of the sun that shone in the halls and the rocking of my tired body as Eli carried me, batting my hands away every time they wandered away from his chest.

I wanted to turn my body over and grind on him. In fact, I was feeling aggressive about it.

What was that smell? Oh god, I loved that smell. Cedar? Ambrosia? Why did I always smell that? Whatever it was, I wanted to roll it up into a good-smelling, sexy ball and then climax on top of that ball.

I couldn’t discern my thoughts. All that was left were feelings and urges—pent-up, angry, rough, supposed-to-be-kept-quiet urges.

It wasn’t until I felt myself drop slightly that I realized Eli was setting me on a bed.

Yesssss.

The room was darker, and I struggled to take note of my surroundings.

Was that still Eli?

“You’re all right. I’m just setting you on the bed and then I’m going to get the maid to start a cold shower and get the witch to make an elixir for you,” Eli whispered. “I’m afraid Mother gave you faerie mead, knowing how it affects non-fae.”

“I don’t want a cold shower. Faerie mead?” I grabbed ahold of him, locking his arms in place.

“The cold shower is for me, I’m afraid,” he chuckled, trying to shake my hold.

I squeezed harder, easily gaining more leverage.

He wouldn’t leave me. He couldn’t leave. I didn’t want him to leave me ever again—if only that was how it could be.

“Faerie mead usually causes those who aren’t fae to get…umm…quite frisky. Artemi are not technically faeries, so I suppose that’s why it’s hit you so hard. It causes a loss of all inhibitions, sort of like human’s alcohol, only about a million times more potent and aimed specifically at making you horny and honest. It’s as good as a truth serum with non-fae. They typically hide a lot, and it seems to…ugh…come out with the mead,” he chuckled.

He surprised me with his own skills as he gently disengaged my hold on him.

“Don’t leave me, please?” I begged, my voice husky and full of pleading.

He paused, still holding me and touching my skin. His godlike face froze above mine with a dreamy expression. A hint of reddish orange I’d never noticed before brightened his honey-colored irises. Was that his heart racing? How could I hear that?

Maybe we could get married, and I could take him with me.

No. I frowned. I wouldn’t make him go where I was going.

“I need to go,” he stated. “You don’t want this. Not really.”

“Maybe I do. Maybe I’ve wanted this for a long time,” I whispered, feeling slightly dejected, still holding tight to his shoulders.

“Not like this,” he whispered back.

“Because you don’t want to ruin our friendship?” I asked, rolling my eyes. My hands tightened around his hard biceps when he attempted to move away from me. “No! I won’t let you push me away and leave me so you can forget about me again. You’ll have plenty of time to hate me later, and eons of immortality to forget me.”

“That’s not true, and you know it.”

“Then why, Prince Aurelius? Why won’t you be with me tonight?” I snapped.

He stilled, and sorrow crossed his features for a moment before it was replaced with something I didn’t recognize on his face. Anger?

“Because I know you like no one else in this world will ever know you. Because I know you grieve him. As much as you will deny it, I saw you two together. You were falling in love with him and had to take his life.”

I pulled away. “I didn’t love him. He tried to kill me. He is awful?—”

“You needn’t convince me of anything, Calypso,” Eli said softly.

“I didn’t love him…but I could have. I was starting to before I…before I…” I could feel each stone from the wall I’d so carefully built beginning to tumble down. “Before I murdered him.”

Thunk. The last brick of my fortress fell with the assistance of mead. I was a horny, crying, angry, drunk assassin—a terrible combination.

“It’s okay, Cal. It’s just me here. You don’t need to be ashamed of anything. I can’t imagine how hard this has all been on you. We haven’t even talked about you being Artemi. I didn’t know you knew.” He moved to the other side of the bed like he was going to hug me.

A torrent of salty tears poured from my eyes. “You can’t imagine. Do you know the most fucked-up part, Eli? Do you? After all these years, the only reason I’ll fail is because of you,” I yelled, picking up a crystal bottle from the nightstand and hurling it at the wall and then continuing with whatever was in reach.

“Because of me?” Eli repeated calmly, not flinching as I threw every breakable object I could get my hands on.

“Yes! I need to destroy the castle and everyone in it.” Out of objects to smash, I moved for one of the large windows.

Eli intercepted me, grabbing both my wrists and holding them tightly.

Shit. Not the wrist holding again.

“Destroy everyone in it?” He held me firm as I growled and tried to free myself.

“All except you! And that’s why I’ll fail. You’ve made me weak,” I screamed, my voice bouncing off the walls of the semidark room.

He blocked my kick to his groin with surprisingly fast reflexes.

I doubt he could even understand my words the way they ripped out of my throat in great heaves and bellows. “I need to go to Moirai.” I froze. Even in the state of mind I was in from the mead, I knew I had never wanted to say that out loud.

“Moirai? Okay, remind me never to get an assassin drunk.” Eli’s grip softened. “You are talking nonsense. You need to go to bed.”

I tried to head-butt him, but he avoided it like it was nothing.

“Mendax was so different from what you both described,” I blubbered on. “He was kind and mysterious! It was just so… He saw through me! He saw every little dark shadow inside of me. And even seeing all of me, knowing I was there to kill him, he still couldn’t stop himself from wanting me . He—he was unhinged for me! The evil fuck loved me just as I was. Every dark nook that I was embarrassed of and hid from you guys, he ached for! How could I not have felt something for him?” I stopped my physical assault and sunk even deeper into my words, letting myself believe Eli held my hands out of comfort instead of restraint. “When I pressed the blade into him and I had finally completed my last order, I thought the evil and hate in me would leave, Eli—that everything I had done would somehow change me, make me finally feel normal, like you guys. But the dark corners only grew. They took root and then added smoke. I hate that I had to kill him!” I wailed as I lost myself in a rare burst of hysterics.

“Shhhh, it’s okay,” Eli whispered. His breath tickled the wisps of hair around my forehead, reminding me who it was who was hearing my broken rant.

At some point, Eli had pulled my angry, upset body into his and folded his arms and wings around me in a tight, solid hug-cocoon. He hadn’t gotten upset at my confession, it seemed. His sole focus seemed to be comforting me as he continued to hold me and whisper soft, undecipherable words that cascaded over my forehead.

“I’m just…so confused,” I mumbled softly as I deflated into the damp, tearstained fabric on his warm chest.

“It’s okay, Cal. Anyone would be confused with all of that. Maybe you did love him, and that’s okay.” His hand gently held my head to his chest, stopping the loud protest I was about to make. “But even if you didn’t see it then, he was a truly horrible man, you understand me?” He tilted my chin up and looked deep into my tear-filled eyes. “He would have killed you eventually, Calypso. But of course he loved you. He would have been a fool not to, and Mendax was many awful, terrible things, but a fool was not one of them.”

He put my head back against his concrete-hard chest. I could feel the strong, steady thump of his heart against my cheek, the heat of his body causing even more confusion inside of me.

“It kills me to think that you are struggling with all of this alone, Cal. You don’t ever need to hide anything from me. And just so you are aware, I could be unhinged for you too.”

“You don’t know what I’ve done for her, Eli.” I shuddered.

He looked hard at me for a moment, searching my eyes for something. “And you don’t know what I’ve done for her,” he whispered as his arms tightened around me.

When I had first started taking orders from Saracen, as a teenage girl, I learned very quickly—and unpleasantly—how strong and awful the fae could be if they got to you first. I stopped letting that happen. I found it much easier—and I suppose a bit more rewarding—to take my marks out in a different way, when they least suspected it. I learned to be whatever that individual least suspected to be dangerous. It became a game and a way to release some of my pain and anger.

Queen Saracen and I agreed that the explanation for my power would be that she had blessed me with a bit of Seelie magic for saving her life. This strange and amazing gift caused animals to be drawn to me. That’s what we would say until it was time to tell everyone I was Artemi. We had to hide it from everyone somehow, and Saracen was happy to take the credit. She had even convinced them it was a Seelie royal gift of hers that had skipped them, just as shifting into a fox skipped her.

The truth was, my magic always made me feel bad for the animals. If they understood what a horrible person I was, I knew they wouldn’t be drawn to me anymore. It was only the Artemi powers that attracted them.

I groggily lifted my head, and a shock of cold air hit my warm, damp cheek. My eyes began to adjust. Where was I?

Gold renaissance-style swirls covered the expansive, white walls. I wiped the sleep from my eyes and methodically marked everything’s location on a map in my mind: a great white fireplace in the corner. One large four-poster bed. A wardrobe against the wall near a few other small tables. Broken porcelain and glass everywhere. Two large, arched windows with cream-colored satin curtains. Two doors, one an exit, one a bathroom. Nearest one about twenty paces to my left.

Deep reddish-orange sun poured through the windows, causing odd shadows to hang in the corners of the room. The small crackling fire caused the shadows to move in deceptive shapes. Eli must have lit the fire last night.

The mattress below me rumbled, and I nearly hit the ceiling.

Oh. My. God.

Eli was the rumbling mattress. Eli was under me in the bed!

Had we…?

No, I knew I would remember that.

In shock, I backed away toward the foot of the mattress, not realizing until it was too late that I had moved my chest down between Eli’s widespread legs. I let out a silent scream. I was still too tired for this.

Urging my hands to stop shaking, I pushed them onto his thighs to slowly lift myself up.

Eli snapped awake, sitting up and grabbing my arms before I had a chance to even blink. His pupils widened, darkening slightly as he took in the situation. Eli’s golden wings snapped out, knocking something over on the nightstand.

Oh no.

Eli masked it well, but I had seen his desire. His manners thankfully took precedence, and he stood immediately and helped me sit on the edge of the bed. Alone. The sun-hazed room blurred slightly with my movements, the soft notes of smoke and spice dragging against my senses.

“I-I’m so sorry, Calypso. I tried to leave last night, but you put me in chokehold and told me you’d replace me with a new best friend.” Eli smiled. “Nothing happened. Though I will say the smoke chains were a bit excessive,” he snorted.

“I didn’t… Oh, Eli, I’m so sorry.” I covered my face with my palms. “Wait…smoke chains?” I remembered the chokehold, but…I couldn’t make chains of smoke…

“You did. Oh, don’t be embarrassed. To be honest, the chains were wildly impressive. Here I thought you were asleep, and suddenly my legs were bolted to the bed, my arms and hands tied to my sides. Even my throat was chained to the headboard,” he chuckled. “Don’t show Mother what you can do with that smoke, or she’ll drug us both.”

I’d only ever seen one chain of smoke before, and it had been around my throat.

That was impossible though. Mendax was dead.

“Oh my god.”

“I’m sorry, bad joke. Caly, please don’t feel bad. I hope you trust me enough to know I would never touch you without your consent. Tartarus, even when you said you wanted it last night, I wouldn’t touch you.” He was almost wheezing, he laughed so hard now. “I will say though, whatever makes you feel safe, I support you fully, but next time, could you lighten up on the throat chains? I think you may have drawn blood. You should have heard the crazy things you said.”

I stood up in alarm to look at his neck. Sure enough, link-shaped indentations and bruises encircled his neck, his gold Seelie blood drying in spots.

“Eli…I didn’t…” I trailed off. I hadn’t done this. I couldn’t have if I’d wanted to. I had no control over my smoke. But if I didn’t do it…

“Suns, Caly, all the blood has drained from your face. I will get the healer for your hangover, even though I know that you will heal quickly. I wouldn’t worry, just the aftereffects of the mead,” he said, patting my arm.

I sat on the bed, trying to reason out the situation.

He was right though—ever since my time in Unseelie, I had healed oddly fast, even before bonding with Mendax. I didn’t think my powers could do that…

“I am glad you are here, Cal.”

“I want the stream back,” I rasped as tears began to threaten. The scent of the cozy fire was the only thing grounding me.

“The stream?” he asked and moved to sit on the edge of the bed next to me.

“I want to go back to when everything was right. When I was whole and a good, normal person. When I still had Mom and Adrianna. I want to go back to when I thought I would grow up to be an astronaut. To when you and I would spend all day in the stream, playing pirates. I want the stream back, where we were just best friends, Eli.” I choked on the words.

The prince looked hurt, recoiling slightly. “We are and will always be friends, Calypso.” He stood from the bed and straightened his shirt as he walked toward one of the large, arched windows. “I would give anything I have to bring your mom and sister back, truly I would,” he said, turning to face me, his shadow darkening as he stood next to the barely illuminated window. “I don’t know the details of what you had to do for my mother, and I know it’s not something you ever want to talk about.” He sped on to cover my protests. “But I also know the basics of what you had to do, and you are still very much whole and good.” He brushed a hand over his golden hair and handsome face. “I had hoped my mother wouldn’t discuss us marrying. At least not on the day of your arrival. She is being unreasonable, but I will not lie to you and say I haven’t thought about it a thousand times on my own.”

My stomach flipped nervously. “You can’t be serious,” I bit out gruffly, startling him. “It’s been years since I’ve even seen you. Hell, we are only even best friends in absentia at this point!”

He was suddenly in my face with fire in his amber eyes. “Yes, and why was that, Caly? Why was that?” He gripped my shoulders, and though his touch was gentle, his expression was anything but.

I’d never seen him like this. I was too stunned to say anything back. After a pause, Eli continued.

“Because my mother banished me from the human realm! Do you have any idea what happens when you disobey a faerie queen, Caly? Death! Do you think she’d show mercy just because I am her son?” He was gripping my shoulders tighter now, and I fought the girlish urge to slap him or, worse, the assassin’s urge to suffocate him with the fluffy pillow that brushed against my thigh.

“Queen Saracen would never kill you, Aurelius. Especially just for going to see me,” I replied with a wavering voice.

His expression suddenly softened. His hands slid down my arms, and he clenched his jaw with a pained expression. “No. She would have forced you to kill me,” he whispered. “The simple fact that you don’t even realize that means you don’t know her as well as you think you do.”

“You have no idea what I know about her,” I snapped back, fighting the urge to grab the pillow.

Smoke had begun to fill the space between us, and for once I was thankful for the charcoal smog. I wanted to hide beneath its dark mask. I didn’t want to cry in front of him anymore than I already had. Maybe I was delusional, but the smoke from the fire now had the most calming scent I’d ever inhaled. I wanted to bury myself in it and hide. It was a shame my own smoke couldn’t smell like this. It never smelled like anything.

“Fuck. This is not how I wanted your first days in Seelie to be.” He rubbed his hands down his face in frustration, absently swatting at the thick smoke between us. “This was too much, I’m sorry. The healer will be in shortly to check on you. I think I’d better go so you can rest. This entire wing is yours. Get some rest, and feel free to roam it whenever you like.”