Chapter 29
29
ALEJANDRO
‘Wow!’ Jasmine gasped as she took in the views in front of her.
After spending some time ‘testing’ the four-poster bed in our new room, we had finally made our way to the shower, got dressed and headed outside of the hotel.
Now we were standing barefoot on the famous Seven Mile Beach in Negril and it was just as impressive as I had heard.
As the name suggested, the stunning, white, sandy beach stretched for miles and the crystal-clear waters were so transparent, you could see right down to the bottom.
‘I understand why this is known as one of the best beaches in Jamaica,’ I said, continuing to admire the scenery.
‘Definitely! It looks like a postcard.’
‘Shall we walk?’ I held out my hand.
‘Love to!’ Jasmine took my palm.
‘So, are you having a good time?’ I asked.
The real question I wanted to ask was whether what happened between us last night and this morning meant she had changed her mind about us just hooking up for the weekend, but I did not want to come on too strong and scare her.
‘I’m having the time of my life! I’m in paradise, walking along a beautiful beach, with a gorgeous man who should be entered into the Guinness Book of Records for delivering the most orgasms in…’ she looked at her watch ‘…in a twelve-hour period. I have no idea how you’re so good!’
‘I am glad that I satisfied you.’ I smiled, feeling ten feet tall.
‘But seriously though, how are you so good? Did you go to some sort of female-pleasure masterclass or is it because you’ve slept with lots of women?’ She laughed and my face fell.
I sucked in a breath, taking in the fresh, salty sea air. Her question caught me off guard.
‘No. I have not slept with a lot of women.’
‘I find that hard to believe! I’ve seen the way they throw themselves at you. Like Kadesha did at breakfast.’
‘I have not dated anyone for years. And before that, I was in a relationship for almost three years.’
‘Really?’ Her eyes widened.
‘ Sí .’
‘Why did you break up?’
My stomach clenched. I paused and my gaze dropped to the sand as I tried to build up the strength to tell her. Even two years later, I still found it difficult to talk about.
‘She…’ I swallowed the lump in my throat.
Jasmine stopped walking and stood in front of me, her face etched with concern.
‘It’s okay.’ She squeezed my hand. ‘You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I find it difficult sometimes to talk about my divorce, so I know how hard break-ups can be. Forget I asked.’
‘We did not break up,’ I said and Jasmine frowned. ‘She… died.’
Jasmine’s jaw dropped and her eyes bulged.
‘Oh my God!’ She put her hand over her mouth. ‘I am so sorry!’ Jasmine threw her arms around my back and squeezed me tight. My body melted into hers.
Now that I had told her, it was actually a relief. No one at work knew and the closer I got to Jasmine, somehow it felt like I was carrying a secret that weighed heavy on my shoulders. Telling her about an important part of my past felt right.
It was hard enough when people asked about my parents. But telling them I had lost my girlfriend too only made things even more difficult.
There was even a time that I blamed myself. When I wondered if I somehow made bad things happen to those around me.
When I mentioned this to Lola, she insisted that was not true, explaining that if it was, that meant she was also to blame because she was close to Freya too.
In the end, I realised that this was just life. We loved and we lost. And when things happened, both good and bad, often they were out of our control.
It was a shame that knowing that did not lessen the pain.
I pulled away, then sat on the sand. Jasmine positioned herself in front of me and took my hands in hers.
‘Her name was Freya. It was a skiing accident,’ I said, knowing that it was natural that she would want to know what happened. ‘She loved to ski. Her family went every year since they were kids. I was supposed to go with her, but I got a last-minute opportunity to work at a great hotel in London, which was where we were living at the time. She was the reason I moved to London. Freya was my sister’s best friend. They were the same age. They went to uni together.’
‘Oh,’ Jasmine said and I realised that I was just vomiting random sentences. I was just so used to the questions people often asked, like how we met and why I moved to London, that I just started listing off all the responses at once.
‘Anyway, so I was supposed to go with her and I did not. If I was there, maybe I could have done something. I could have saved her.’ A sharp pain shot through my chest.
‘I’m sure it wouldn’t have changed things,’ Jasmine said softly. ‘Her family were there. They would’ve done everything they could. And although I didn’t know her, I’m sure Freya wouldn’t want you to carry around that kind of guilt. She’d want you to live your life.’
‘You are right. She was always supportive of my career and believed I would become a top chef one day. She wanted the best for me. But even knowing that, it has been hard. Lola always tells me that Freya would want me to date again, but it has always felt like I was being unfaithful to her memory. Until last night.’ I fixed my gaze on Jasmine.
‘Wait.’ She paused, her eyes widening. ‘Am I the first woman that you’ve slept with since…?’
‘ Sí .’ I nodded. ‘I have come close before. Lola tried to set me up with someone about a year ago when I came to visit. But when we got to the bedroom, I could not go through with it. And since then, I had no desire to be with any other woman. Until you.’
‘That… that means a lot.’ She squeezed my hand. ‘Last night must’ve been a big deal. I wish I’d known, so that I could’ve checked on you. Made sure you were okay.’
‘I am good. No, more than good. You made me feel incredible, Jasmine.’
Our eyes locked.
What I said was true. Whenever I had tried to move on in the past, it had always seemed wrong. I was convinced it was too soon. But with Jasmine, everything felt right. It was as natural as breathing. I no longer felt that guilt.
Last night was not just incredible because of the sex. It was a breakthrough because it showed that there was life after Freya. I finally felt like I was ready to start a new chapter in my life, which for a very long time was something I feared would never be possible.
‘I’m glad to hear it. And I appreciate you telling me. I know it must be hard to talk about.’
‘Usually, I find it difficult. But you are easy to talk to. I feel like I could tell you anything.’
That was one of the many things I loved about Jasmine. She always knew how to put people at ease and genuinely cared about making others happy. I had noticed it with the hotel guests and everyone she worked with. That was why she was so popular and amazing at her job.
‘Thanks. That means a lot.’
‘So now you know that I am not the Casanova you seem to think I am. I will be honest: it has been so long for me that I was surprised I remembered what to do!’ I smiled, trying to lighten the mood. I did not want to make Jasmine sad.
‘Same here!’ Jasmine laughed and my heart instantly swelled with happiness. ‘It’s been a long time for me too. But turns out that sex is just like riding a bike.’
‘Riding a bike?’ I frowned.
‘Sorry! It’s another English saying. It means once you learn how to do something, you don’t forget. It’s not literal. Although my vagina does kind of feel like I’ve taken part in the Tour de France! It’s very sore downstairs!’ She laughed again.
‘ Lo siento ,’ I apologised.
‘Oh no! I’m not complaining! In case you couldn’t tell from my screams, I was very, very happy.’
‘Good,’ I said then laughed as I remembered what the receptionist had said about other guests hearing Jasmine calling my name.
I liked to know I was doing a great job at work, but hearing that I had satisfied Jasmine in the bedroom made me feel fantastic.
A guy came over and asked if we wanted to buy some souvenirs, but when we said no, he left.
‘Do you want to sit here for a bit longer or continue walking?’ Jasmine asked.
‘We can carry on walking.’ I stood up and held out my hand. She took it and I led her over to the sea where the water gently lapped against the shore.
And as we walked along the beach, hand in hand, staring in awe at the bright-blue, cloudless sky, watching the palm trees gently swaying and feeling the soft sand under our feet, I wondered once again whether I was dreaming.
Being here, in paradise with Jasmine, was perfection. It was everything I had wished for and more.
My only wish was that it could last for longer than just this weekend.