When Forever Stays (The Forever Duet)

Twenty Three

TWENTY THREE

DANA

I haven’t slept in over thirty-six hours. My eyes burn from staring at my computer screen for the last thirty of those hours. As I look out at the group of teenage girls, any exhaustion flees, and I’m invigorated more than that time I drank a triple shot of espresso. The doors close, and Mrs. Woodhouse gives me the nod to go ahead. I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face and the tears that spring to my eyes. Those tears take away the burning in my dry eyes, and I take it as a tiny God-wink that He’s with me, providing for even my silliest needs. I turn my face and swipe the teardrops away.

The sanctuary has been transformed into fellowship central. Circular tables are sprinkled throughout the large room, eight chairs around each one. Every table is full. For the millionth time in my life, I am floored by how amazing Jesus is. All the girls chose to be here to learn how to study God’s Word this weekend.

Lord, thank you for getting me here. Thank you for this opportunity. Let my words be Yours and not mine. I am Your willing vessel; fill me with Your Spirit so my cup overflows and pours into these young women this weekend. Amen.

Another brief wave of tears flows from my eyes, and I grab a tissue from the box on the podium to dab them.

After switching on my headset, I say, “Sorry, this is all so beautifully overwhelming. Seeing all you young women sitting in this sanctuary smiling up at me is surreal. So many of you love like Jesus, and it is truly encouraging to my heart. It’s a blessing to know you and to be here. So thank you for having me.”

My group of girls shouts from their seats, “We love you, Miss Dana!”

Tears spring to my eyes. “Stop it! I’m going to cry again!” I wipe them away but then whisper into the mic, “I love you girls too.”

Then it’s time to get to business. I have hours of material ready to share and a pep in my spirit that I’ve never experienced before as I dive into the lesson surrounding the hard truth I’ve been personally going through over the last several weeks: the need for forgiveness.

When Nancy asked me to be the teacher for this retreat, I felt honored, and after a lot of prayer and encouragement from not only my girls but several other small group leaders, I felt the undeniable urge to say yes. So I did, yet I couldn’t figure out what I was going to teach. Until Rhett. Until I had to come to the end of myself, fall to my knees, and give it to God. Because this is for Him. Not for me. Not even for my girls. But for God’s glory. And my prayer, even when I was unable to write a single word, was that He would be glorified.

I wrap up my current lesson and look out at the group of teens and their leaders, all of them presumably applying what I shared. An indescribable feeling of pride washes over me. But not personal pride, more of a gratefulness that God has chosen me for this opportunity and given me the ability to do it.

Olivia waves me over from our table, and I take my mic off and set it on the podium before heading over. I sit beside her, and she wraps an arm around me, giving me a gentle squeeze.

“You were amazing. Practically glowing up there. I am so proud of you!” She kisses my temple like she used to do when I was little.

We sit with our girls and work through the study method I just taught, and I can practically see the light bulbs go off as we read and study each passage on forgiveness. Emma’s face slowly becomes crestfallen, and I know she realizes the truth: she also needs to forgive.

She turns to me, eyes watery. “Miss Dana, I-I think it’s time I forgive Millie.”

“I think so too.”

“Can I call her?” she asks.

We had the girls turn their phones off so they would focus on the retreat and not the next social media craze. For this situation, I make an exception. Emma pulls her phone from her bag and impatiently taps her foot as it turns on.

Emma places the call and chews on her thumbnail as the phone rings, looking more nervous than I’ve ever seen her. Our group sits and waits with bated breath.

Millie answers on the fifth ring. “Emma?” The disbelief in her soft voice is clear.

“Yeah, it’s me. I-I...” Emma stutters. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry for being so ugly toward you. It was wrong of me. Even though you shouldn’t?—”

I nudge Emma and give her a stern look. “It’s not about that,” I mouth.

She takes a deep breath. “You apologized, and instead of forgiving you, I’ve held it over you.” A tear slips down her cheek. “And I’m sorry for that.”

“Oh, I forgive you!” Millie cries over the phone. “I’m so sorry I went behind your back. I didn’t do it to hurt you, I was just trying to?—”

“I know,” Emma says. “You were trying to be a good friend and do what I didn’t have the nerve to.”

“Exactly…” Millie trails off, then says, “Aren’t you at the retreat this weekend?”

“Yeah,” Emma answers. “I’m there right now.”

“Oh.” Millie sounds disappointed. “Well, I’ll let you get back to it.”

I grab Emma’s phone. “Would you want to come? It’s not too late. We still have the sleepover, and in the morning, we’ll dig into a new passage.”

“Really?” Millie asks enthusiastically.

“Sure!” Olivia says. “As long as it’s okay with your parents, I’ll come pick you up now.”

Millie shouts, “Mom! Can I go to the retreat at church?”

There’s shuffling on the other end as if her mom is coming into the room with her. “Isn’t that happening right now?” Millie’s mom asks.

“Yeah, but Miss Olivia said she can come get me.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I’ll drive you. I told you that you’d regret not going,” her mom says.

“Mom,” Millie whines exasperatedly. “They can hear everything you’re saying.”

We all laugh.

It doesn’t take long for Millie to arrive but when she does, her smile is broad and I can tell she’s excited to be here.

Emma greets Millie with a bear hug.

“I’m so sorry. I never should have held onto that grudge for so long.”

Tears stream down both girls’ cheeks.

“And I’m sorry for what I did too.”

They both give each other another hug and we pray again, asking for God’s continued guidance through our studies.

The rest of the weekend is a blur of Bible study, activity, bonding, and worship. As I share my passion with these students, I find myself feeling renewed and rejuvenated like never before. It’s as if God is refilling me as I pour into these girls.

It’s taken a lot of pain, struggle, and heartache to get here. I was spiritually dryer than dry and terrified I wouldn’t be able to keep my promise of leading this weekend. But in God’s perfect timing, through His unwavering goodness, the lessons came together. By God’s amazing grace, we had an incredible weekend.