When Sky Breaks: Burn & Break Duet Book 2

5. Sky

A bitter angercourses through my veins from the night before.

At myself.

How could I ignore my dad like this? He needed me, and I fucking turned my back on him.

It was bad enough having Trek on my couch the whole night, his presence reminding me of my sins. Sleep never came and I tossed and turned to images of Chase and Foster, my failures on an endless loop. August appeared as well, a dark shadow, further souring my mood as the sun rose.

I tear open the closet and drag out my large duffel as Trek sits on the edge of my bed, his hair in disarray, watching me meltdown.

“It’s going to be okay. He’s going to be okay.” Trek’s attempts at calming me down are shit.

“We don’t know that. There are never any guarantees. Ever.” Blowing out a hot breath, I stomp to my drawers and gather what I need for a prolonged visit. I don’t know how long I’ll be there, how bad his prognosis is, how his temperament is going to be, how he’ll manage shopping and cooking, and what if, what if?—

“Sky, come here.” Trek stands and pulls me to his chest once it’s obvious I’m having a breakdown.

I don’t want his comfort, but fighting it isn’t possible. I cling to his sweatshirt, mindful he doesn’t smell a thing like August or Johnny and not sure if I’m okay with either of those thoughts or not. I’m not okay with any of this.

“This doesn’t mean I forgive you,” I say, my voice muffled as he hugs me tight.

The soft fabric of his clothes helps me fight the courage to look him in the eyes. Avoiding his sad face is the only thing I can do lest I give in too easily. Trek was always a good brother, even when he fucked up. He was genuine and fierce in his loyalty to his family. But it was a lie, or at least felt like a lie, and all I have are my overwhelming feelings, as raw as they are.

My bleeding heart breaks open once again, and a sob rips from my throat. Home is the last place I want to be, but it’s the only place I should be. Foster needs me and honestly, I need him, too.

“I know, I know,” Trek murmurs into my hair. “This isn’t about us right now. This is about Dad. You and I will talk, though, so you’re going to have to wrap your head around that at some point. We can’t keep running from it.”

He steps away and lets me move past him to wipe my face and continue my packing. “Did you really not open anything I sent you?”

I shake my head in silence and dump a bunch of rolled socks into my duffel, knowing there’s a washing machine at home, but the stress makes me believe it won’t be enough, that nothing will be enough.

Not enough time, not enough treatment options, not enough moments to make up for the ones I lost, all because I’m hurting. Sounds stupid when I think about it.

My breathing fumbles when I snag on August’s sweatshirt in the drawer, the soft material bringing more tears.

Before I go overboard with my emotions, I grow impulsive and stuff it in my bag along with the unopened packages from Trek. He sees them and quirks a brow, but all he’s getting from me is the silent treatment. I’m not ready to go down the rabbit hole with him.

Not yet.

“When is his appointment with the oncologist?”

“Tuesday.”

“And it’s really cancer?” I fight back more tears.

He rubs his temple, the blue in his eyes dimming a fraction as he nods.

My nurse hat is at war with my daughter hat, but I put one foot in front of the other and try not to focus on all the tiny medical details.

Just get home first.

* * *

The hug I give Phoebe is fierce, if not a little rough, as I drag her close enough to breathe in her rose shampoo. “Phoebs. Why didn’t you tell me?”

She leans back and brushes away the stray hairs that fell from my ponytail with all the packing. “He wasn’t supposed to be there. It was supposed to be a lunch thing. But if you knew Trek was forcing his way into our plans, you would’ve done what you do best where it concerns him. Run.”

“I was looking forward to another Cosmo, you know,” I mutter, some of my irritation deflating.

She laughs. “We’ll go back, I promise.”

“Thanks, I guess.” I sigh. “I don’t know how long I’ll be gone. Feel free to sublet my room if you want. Work already knows I’m applying for a leave of absence for at least six months. Maybe longer.”

“And invite a potential serial killer into our apartment? Hell no. It’s yours until you don’t need it. Now go home. Take care of your dad and fix things with Trek.”

“I object, and I plead the fifth.”

“Doesn’t work outside the courtroom, babe,” she quips, her dark eyes glittering despite the somber circumstances.

“You’re spoiling my fun.”

“Hah, it’s called tough love.”

“Absolute bullshit,” I grumble, hiking my bag over my shoulder.

“When has love ever made sense? But I won’t lie. Losing the apartment doc will kind of suck.” She pouts.

“Nurse, Phoebs. Big difference.”

“Not to me. I’ll tell Graham you said goodbye and text you later. Give Foster a hug for me. Tell him I still have that fire extinguisher he gifted me at graduation.”

We laugh and hug again, this time—tight—because we want to.

Trek loads my bags in the trunk as I stare down at my phone. There are several missed calls from Johnny. I haven’t reached out to him yet, not because I don’t want to, but because I spent most of the evening and this morning in tears over Foster.

So I shouldn’t be surprised when he arrives in front of the apartment in his Range Rover.

Trek leans against my car with his arms folded and watches as Johnny gets out, lifting his sunglasses to his head. He’s clad head to toe in athletic gear, likely on his way to the hospital gym before his shift starts.

“You never called,” Johnny says, planting himself in front of me, his head cocked, concern furrowing his brows. He sees me carrying my purse. “Did I catch you at a bad time or…?”

I sigh and latch onto his arm, steering him down the sidewalk out of Trek’s listening radius.

Finally, I stop near a tree, its pale green leaves hiding the sun, providing a chill to the air.

“I have to go back home.”

“Okay,” he says, scratching his ear, clearly confused.

“Back to my hometown in Maizeville. My dad’s sick.”

“And that’s why your brother had to talk to you. How come you never told me about him?” Classic Dr. Hawk in action, forgetting that emotions are necessary and going straight to the chase.

I inhale and grab his hand, needing some sort of comfort. He curls his fingers around mine, brushing my knuckles with his thumb. “I didn’t tell you about him because, well, I haven’t been home in five years. Trek and I had a falling out, and I just couldn’t be there anymore. And he’s technically my adopted brother.”

Johnny blinks. Maybe he’s rethinking this whole dating me thing. “Adopted?”

“When I was twelve. Long story short, my house burned down when I was ten, and I lost my family. Trek and Foster adopted me a few years later, and that’s that.”

Definitely, not just that, but there are only so many revelations I plan on parting with him.

He blows out a breath and finally pulls me in for a hug. “I’m sorry, babe. That has to be a lot for you to handle.”

I nod into his chest, inhaling the fresh scent of laundry on his shirt.

“How sick is he?”

I was hoping to avoid saying this to a literal cancer doctor but here we are. “According to Trek, he just got diagnosed with cancer.”

He blows out a breath, ruffling my hair. “What type?”

I finally lift my head. “We meet Tuesday to discuss in more detail the diagnosis, but it’s looking like a blood cancer. They biopsied some tissue and believe it’s in his lymph nodes.”

A dent appears between his brows. “How long will you be gone?”

I shrug and step back. “Not sure. I’ve applied for a six month leave and could take up to a year?—”

“A year?” his incredulous voice dips low.

Taken aback by his tone, I scrunch up my brows. “I don’t know how bad it is, Johnny. You, of all people, should know that cancer doesn’t always follow a predictable pattern, and I can’t even think about leaving my dad while he’s dealing with this. Even if it wasn’t cancer, this visit has been long overdue. I’m waiting on HR to return my call, so for now, I’m using PTO until I know more.”

He pulls me back in for another hug, running his hands up and down my back. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking. We just started seeing each other and Maizeville is far. I attended a lecture at the hospital in the town over a few years ago.”

“Three hours away is far, so if this isn’t going to work out…” I let my statement fall, and he chuckles, the rumble deep in his chest.

“Babe, I don’t spend my time with just anyone. I like you and not going to be scared off that easily.” He grips my arms and looks me in the eye, his brown ones sparkling. They really are very pretty and expressive. “There’s always video chats and I’ll come visit.”

That makes me stiffen, but I hide it by staring at his chest. Not sure how I’m going to deal with being home and adding him to the mix? That small town might not be able to contain him.

“Besides, it’s not like you have some secret boyfriend holed up in that town, right? No one I need to be worried about stealing my girl?”

I dart my gaze from his broad shoulders to his face, hoping he can’t read the panic on mine. Technically, August isn’t even within a hundred-mile radius of Maizeville anymore, but his presence is everywhere. Here’s to pretending I’m over that part of my life.

“No. Definitely not. Nothing to be worried about.”

* * *

After a very chaste kiss, I send Johnny away with a promise to text later and try to ignore Trek eyeing him like expired meat in the fridge as we pile in my car.

As soon as he clicks his seatbelt and I turn the key, Trek starts in.

“Who is that guy?”

The word boyfriend briefly filters across my mind, but that was Johnny’s words, not mine.

“We’re casually dating.”

“What does that even mean? He gives me weird vibes.”

“Not that I need to tell you anything, but he’s a doctor at the hospital I work at. Oncologist. And it’s still new.”

Trek hums without saying another word, and we lapse into a tense silence. The clever asshole forced me to drive us back when he hitched a ride up here with a friend in exchange for pizza.

The remaining hours of the drive to Maizeville are stilted. My tears have dried—for now—yet the general anguish still hovers around us in my compact car.

I willfully ignored my dad’s efforts to bring me home for visits, and I’m betting he was trying to get me back to tell me about his diagnosis.

I’m such a stubborn fool. I stew, clenching my jaw.

“It’s not your fault, you know,” Trek says to break through the awful silence.

I’m tempted to turn up the radio so I don’t have to talk to him. But my heart fractures at his soft tone. It’s easy to forget he lost his mom at a young age, and now our father’s life is in limbo. The idea of him losing both parents tempers my anger. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

The sigh I release is not as bitter as before. “When you say it like that, it feels like my fault, even though logically, I know it’s not. What did he do, tell you to come up and bring me home like the sad, lost puppy I am?”

“You’re not sad, and you’re not really lost,” he drawls out, some semblance of humor breaching through his words. “But yeah, he wanted to tell you and not over the phone. I just got fed up with waiting on your ass.” He raises his hands once I flick him a hostile gaze. “Sorry, not sorry. You and I got shit to deal with, and although it’s incredibly crappy timing, it’s gonna happen. Just not until we get things with Dad squared away. He’s a priority.”

As he should be.

I ignore Trek like it’s my favorite pastime and focus on the road. I know I’ve let this go on for too long, but is there really a timeline for any sort of grief? Or on a grudge built from really fucking legit trauma?

“Are you staying at home, too? What about your job?” I ask because I truly don’t know. Most of the information I got was from Foster, but he knew I wasn’t interested in Trek’s comings and goings anymore.

“Well, if you had picked up that little device we all carry around on a daily basis, you’d know I’ve been living with Dad for the past few months. I work remotely, so it works.”

I sputter, gripping the steering wheel tighter. “He was diagnosed that long ago? What the fuck?”

Trek glares at the side of my face. “No, it hasn’t been that long. He noticed the knots in his lymph nodes a few weeks ago, but I guess he’s felt off for a while and chalked it up to getting older. I moved home to save money and keep an eye on him. The economy is shit. Apartments are stupid expensive, so he’s letting me stay. But again, you’d know all this if you picked up your damn phone.”

Because he’s mostly right, I chew the inside of my cheek, each lane of the highway blurring with unshed tears.

“Be mad at me. It’s okay, I can take it. But I was sick of waiting on you, and unfortunately, Dad’s health was the last straw. We need you whether you think you need us.” Trek’s hands tremble as I glance over. “Five years, sis. Five goddamn years since I last saw you. Since we’ve been together as a family.” He bites his lip in apparent frustration, and I turn back to the road before I crumble. “Jesus, I’m sorry. I’m taking shit out on you. Just know I missed you, okay?”

The tenuous grip on my emotions almost shatters. But I nod and hold in the many tears I fear I’ll be shedding in the days to come.