When We Burn (The Blackwells of Montana #1)

Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

DANI

I splash some cold water on my face and then stare at my reflection in the mirror. I don’t look quite as pale as when I came in here a minute ago. Bridger joined his family in the dining room, and I detoured to the bathroom to calm down the rest of the way.

I’ve had such a great day with my man and his adorable daughter. Being on the ranch is fun and doesn’t bother me at all. I’ve always loved it out here.

Unless someone mentions those darn chickens, and then I lose it. They’re just birds. But the trauma I still carry from them is in the marrow of my bones, and it might be the one thing that I’ll never fully recover from. The screams. The horrifying noises that the chickens made when my father tortured them. I’ll never un hear those screams. The stricken expression on my sisters’ faces.

I shudder.

I know it could be much worse, and it felt good to have Bridger hold me through the worst of the panic attack.

I pat my face dry with a towel and take a deep breath.

I’m not going to let bad memories ruin the rest of this day. The house smells delicious, and I’m hungry, so I open the door of the bathroom and am surprised to find Bridger leaning against the opposite wall, waiting for me, his arms crossed over his chest, looking delicious.

“You should be eating,” I inform him, taking his offered hand and linking our fingers.

“I’m making sure my girl’s okay.”

His girl. It never fails to wake up the butterflies in my belly.

“I’m much better, thank you.” I boost up on my toes and offer him my lips, and he gives me a quick kiss. “And I’m hungry.”

“Well, we can take care of that.”

Bridger leads me to the dining room off the kitchen, where everyone’s already seated around the table, filling their plates.

“How’s the school year going, Dani?” Brooks asks as he passes me a wooden bowlful of fresh rolls from the oven. He smiles at me, and any remaining nerves I have dissipate.

“It’s going really well,” I reply as I dig in, accepting platters and bowls to add to my dinner plate, and then passing them on. “I was a little nervous about starting at a new school, but all of the staff has been so great. It helps that I already know so many of them, and my kiddos are super fun. Aren’t you, Birdie? ”

“We’re fun,” Birdie confirms with a nod as she scoops up some mashed potatoes onto her fork. “Miss Dani has snacks and really pretty unicorns all over the room, and we play outside, too.”

Birdie usually calls me Miss Dani, even at home, and I don’t correct her. It’s probably easier for her.

“Recess was always my favorite,” Beck says with a wink. “What did you learn this week?”

“We’re writing words that start with C. And we had to take something to class that starts with C. I wanted to take Pickles, but Dad said no.”

I blink at Bridger, who just laughs. This is news to me.

“Who’s Pickles?” Blake asks.

“My cat,” I reply with a chuckle. “Yeah, it was probably for the best that you brought in some carrots. Besides, you brought enough for everyone, and it was a healthy snack, right?”

Birdie nods and eats her salad.

“Hey, Brooks,” I say, after taking a sip of my water. “I have a weird noise in my car. I’m going to have to make an appointment.”

“What kind of noise?” Bridger jumps in, frowning at me.

“Just a … noise . I don’t know. A rattle? A … squeak?”

“Which is it?” Brooks asks as Bridger continues to frown. What the heck?

“Guys, I’m no mechanic,” I remind them. “It’s just a noise that wasn’t there before.”

“I don’t want you driving an unsafe car,” Bridger says, making me shake my head. Good God, what is it with these overprotective men?

“It’s not unsafe. It’s just a sound. No warning lights are on or anything. Calm down, Chief.”

Bee spews out her water with laughter, Blake’s head whips up to stare at me, and everyone else is cackling as Bridger glowers down at me.

“Excuse us,” he says, taking my hand and pulling me from the room. I can still hear the others laughing. I have to practically jog to keep up with him as he pulls me into an office and shuts the door, pinning me to it with his lower body leaning against me. One hand is pressed to the door, and the other is cupping my jaw and neck and part of my face because his hands are huge, and his brown eyes are on fire .

“Holy crap,” I whisper.

“I said no chief .” But then his mouth is on mine, and he’s kissing me like there’s no tomorrow. When he comes up for air, he tips his forehead against mine, breathing raggedly, his thumb brushing over my cheek. “Call me that again, and I won’t let you come for a week, Dani. I’m not kidding.”

I gulp. For a week ?

“But it caused this , and I like it.”

“No . I won’t tell you again.”

My eyes are pinned to his lips.

“Fuck, I want to sink inside you so bad, but this is not the time or place. Let’s go.”

Before I know what’s happening, he’s opened the door and is dragging me back to the table. There’s still so much laughter in everyone’s eyes, Birdie looks bored, and I’m saved from any further questions because Beckett’s holding up his phone, and it looks like their parents are on video call.

“Is that Dani?” Mama asks with a big smile. Their names are Brandon and Becca, hence, the Double B Ranch, but they always told us kids to call them Mama and Papa, and so I always have. Mama Blackwell is the only mother I’ve ever known. “Oh, you look wonderful, darling.”

“Hi, guys,” I reply with a wave and take my seat. “I’m crashing Sunday dinner.”

“Well, now I’m extra homesick,” Papa says with a wink.

They moved to Florida a few years ago, ready to retire from ranch life, and Mama loves Disney, so it made sense for them to be down there.

But I know that everyone misses them.

“Grandma, we rode the horses today,” Birdie says, taking over the conversation. “And I got to play with the puppies, but they’re going to find homes soon. And there are baby goats.”

“Well, that sounds like a fun day,” Mama says with a soft smile. “Did you help feed the cows?”

“Yep, and I got eggs from the chickens.”

Bridger’s hand covers mine, but I smile up at him. I’m fine.

I glance back to the phone, and I can plainly see that Mama notices where Bridger’s hand is, but she doesn’t say anything about it .

We make small talk as we finish eating, laughing at some of Blake’s stories from the ER. I might be biased, but I think Blake is one of the best doctors there is.

Suddenly, I notice that Birdie gets a weird look on her face.

“Are you okay, baby girl?” I ask her softly, but Bridger hears me and turns his attention to his daughter.

“I’m just tired,” Birdie says and leans back in her chair.

Bridger crooks his finger at her. “Come sit on my lap, peanut.”

Not needing to be told twice, Birdie walks around the table as Bridger scoots back a little and pulls her into his lap. Birdie leans on his chest, as though they’ve sat just like this since she was a baby, which I’m sure they have, and it makes my chest squeeze.

He kisses Birdie’s head and pats her back rhythmically as she settles in for a snuggle.

“I have news,” Mama says, catching our attention. “Your father and I will be there in a few weeks. It’ll be time for apple picking and going to the pumpkin patch, and you know how I love that. Plus, Birdie’s old enough to really enjoy it, and I want to enjoy it with her.”

“Great,” Bee says, clapping her hands. “And you can see my shop.”

“We can’t wait to see it, honey,” Papa says. “Get some Westerns in for me, yeah?”

“I can do that,” Bee replies.

“Don’t worry, Beck, we won’t take over the farmhouse. ”

“This is your home,” Beckett says. “Of course, you’ll stay here.”

“No, it’s your home,” Mama reminds him. “And we’ll be staying at a place in town. We found the cutest bungalow, and this way we don’t have to do as much driving.”

“If you change your mind, just let me know,” Beck replies.

“Dani, I’d like to have lunch with you and your sisters when I’m there,” Mama says. “With Bee, of course. A day out with all my girls.”

“That sounds fabulous.” Bee and I share a smile. “We’ll absolutely be down for that. You name the time and place and we’ll make it happen.”

“What about the boys?” Brooks asks, crossing his arms over his chest. “What are we, chopped liver?”

“No, darling boy, we’ll get lunch, too. Oh, I’m so excited to see my kids,” Mama says with tears in her eyes. “You all be good. We love you.”

“Love you,” everyone replies, waving and blowing kisses, and then they’re gone.

The way the Blackwells grew up versus the way my family did, is as different as it gets. Polar opposites. I’m not used to family dinners together. I mean, sure, I get together with Holden and my sisters a few times a year to eat and talk, but we don’t do this every week.

It’s actually nice.

“Back to your car,” Brooks says beside me. “Just drop it by any time this week and I’ll work it in. It’s probably nothing to worry about.”

“Thanks. I’ll do that. I appreciate it, Brooks. ”

I glance over to Birdie and see that she’s fallen asleep in Bridger’s arms. Without thinking twice, I reach over and brush my fingers through her soft brown hair.

“Sweet baby.”

Bridger catches my hand in his and brings it up to his lips, kissing me softly.

“So.” Blake’s voice is calm and casual as he sips his drink. “Are we to assume that you two have made things official, since there’s a whole lot of dreamy eyes and PDA happening over there?”

“So many dreamy eyes,” Bee agrees with a snicker. “About damn time.”

Bridger smirks at that and then gives me a bright smile.

“I haven’t talked to Birdie, so I’m kind of glad she’s asleep,” he says softly. “But yeah, Dani’s my girl.”

“Aww, how sweet,” Beckett says, giving Bridger shit, but then he smiles. “Good for you, guys. There’s been something there since we were kids.”

He’s right. Bridger was always the one I’d seek out. He’s the one I crushed so hard on. So the fact that we’re together now fills me with hope and excitement, and let’s face it, the sex is… wow.

I feel better than I have in a long, long time. And as much as I’ve always felt like I was part of the Blackwell family, tonight was just the icing on the proverbial cake. Especially with Mama’s easy acceptance of her son and me together. It doesn’t get better than this.

We stayed to help with cleanup and then got Birdie in the car to head home. She’s exhausted, the poor thing.

“She’s been asleep pretty much since dinner,” I say, glancing back to check on her. “What’s going on with her, Bridge?”

He lets out a gusty breath and also checks on her in the rearview mirror. “We don’t know for sure. This has been going on for a year, maybe a little more. She’s just exhausted a lot. Sometimes she gets a stomachache. She’s small for her age, but she’s been growing like a weed through the summer, which made me feel better. She’s actually been doing a lot better all around, but there are days like today when she’s just beat.”

I frown and look back at her once more. Her little bow lips are open, moving as she sleeps. Her cheeks are round, and her dark eyelashes fall against her skin, and she’s the most beautiful, sweet thing.

I would hold her all day long if she were mine.

“Blake’s put her through a ton of tests, but they’ve been inconclusive. It could be as simple as allergies, and he said she might grow out of it. This summer was a relief, since she’s been so much better.”

“Hopefully she’s back to her old self tomorrow.” I reach over and grab Bridger’s hand, giving it a squeeze.

“Come home with us,” he says as he kisses the back of my hand.

“I really should go home and get ready for the week. I don’t have much to do, but I’ll be mad at myself if I leave it for the morning.”

“You could come over when you’re finished.” He smiles over at me. “Late-night snuggles.”

This man is a toucher . And I’m so here for it.

“Is that all you want to do?”

“Well, my bedroom door locks, and there are ways to keep you quiet.” He lifts an eyebrow, and I laugh as his phone rings. “Fuck, that’s work.”

He lets go of my hand and accepts the call.

“Blackwell.”

“We have another five-alarm fire,” someone says through the speakers.

“Text me the address. I’m—shit, I’m thirty out. I have to take my daughter home.”

“I’ll send the info along. This one’s been burning for a few hours before anyone saw, Chief.”

I frown over at him. How could something burn that long without anyone seeing the smoke?

“Where the hell is it?” Bridger asks, obviously as confused as I am.

“It’s a seasonal cabin on the other side of Lion Mountain,” is the response.

“Fuck. I’ll be there ASAP.”

Bridger cuts off the call and blows out a breath.

“I have Birdie,” I assure him. “Don’t worry about her. I’ve got it.”

He quickly glances my way before looking back at the road. “I have to bathe her, put her clothes out for school tomorrow, get her lunch made?— ”

“I’ve got it,” I say again, my voice perfectly calm. “I can manage all those things, Bridge. Don’t worry about us.”

He takes my hand again and kisses it, harder, holding on tighter. “Thank you.”

“Of course.”

As soon as he parks, I run across to my house and gather clothes for tomorrow, a few toiletries, and make sure that Pickles has food and her box is scooped. I stop to give her some extra love and kisses.

“I’m sorry, baby, I have to go help Bridger and Birdie tonight. You keep an eye out here, okay?”

She blinks at me, obviously put out for being interrupted from her evening nap, and then less than fifteen minutes after getting here, I’m back out the door, rushing across the street.

I don’t bother to knock and just walk in and see Bridger striding down the hallway, buttoning up the shirt of his uniform, and I have to take a split second to admire everything that’s going on right there.

He’s tall and broad-shouldered, with those colorful sleeve tattoos. I’m losing sight of the light smattering of dark hair on that chest as he buttons the shirt, and then when he opens his pants to tuck it in, I almost faint.

“Keep looking at me like that, sweetheart, and I’ll be late. Too late.”

“Like what?” I can’t meet his eyes. I’m just watching his impressive hands as they tuck in that shirt and then fasten his pants.

The man’s hips are something to write home about. I know that there’s a V under those clothes, and I have to lick my lips.

“For fuck’s sake, Dani. You’re killing me here.”

Now my eyes climb to his, and I see the lust reflected back at me.

“Sorry. Not really sorry.”

He barks out a laugh and shakes his head. “Birdie’s in bed. She was too tired for the shower, so she’ll get one tomorrow night. She’ll probably sleep all the way through.”

He steps to me and wraps his arm around the small of my back while tipping my face up to his with the other hand, and I wish he didn’t have to go.

“Call me if you need me,” he says softly before covering my mouth. The kiss is over way too quickly, and then he’s out the door.

“Be careful,” I whisper to no one.

Suddenly, the door opens again, and he pokes his head in. “Sleep in my bed. Not on Birdie’s floor. Understood?”

I bite my lip and nod.

“Use your words.”

I shiver every time he says that.

“I hear you.”

He nods and then he’s gone again, and I let out a long breath before I walk back to check on Birdie. Sure enough, she’s asleep in her bed, so I gather my things and take them back to Bridger’s bedroom, where I take a quick shower and change into my pajamas, then I go to the kitchen and make a lunch for Birdie for tomorrow. My phone dings from the living room, and I run to check on it in case it’s Bridger.

But it’s my big brother instead.

Holden: I know you’re dating Bridger, D. You good?

Leave it to my brother to ask about my dating life via text.

Me: Yep. Never happier.

Holden: Good. Making sure I don’t have to murder him. Love you.

Me: Thanks, I think? Love you, too.

I’ve just turned off all the lights in the house, leaving just the entry light on for Bridger, and climbed into his bed when I hear little footsteps in the hallway.

“Daddy?”

“It’s me, honey. Dani. Your daddy had to go to a fire.”

Birdie starts to cry, and it breaks my heart, and then suddenly, she leans forward and throws up.

“Oh, gosh. Okay, we’ve got this.”

When it seems there’s a break, I rush her to the toilet so she can continue to throw up there, and then I realize that she managed to get it all over herself, so when she’s finished, I simply help her strip down and put her in the shower.

“Just a quick one,” I assure her. “We need to get you cleaned up, okay?”

“I want Daddy,” she cries, knuckling the tears in her eyes as I help her get washed. I feel awful for her, and if I could take away how horrible she feels, I would do it in a heartbeat.

“I know you do, sweet girl. I do, too, if I’m being honest. But we can handle this. We’ve got this. Come on, let’s get you dry and in some clean pajamas, and then you can get back in bed.”

“Can I sleep in Daddy’s bed?”

“You bet. You can sleep with me in your daddy’s bed.”

I manage to avoid the mess in the hallway and grab the little girl some clean clothes, get her dressed, and snuggled down in the bed. Then I clean up the vomit, make sure there’s nothing she missed in the bathroom, and slide under the covers with her. She curls up to my side, snuggling me.

“You sleep.” I kiss her forehead and push her hair off her face. “No more sickies, okay?”

“No more sickies.”