Chapter 35 Make A Wish
CHAPTER 35: MAKE A WISH
JACE
L acey hasn’t come out of her room since I heard her yell “fuck you” at Chris. I have to admit it made me laugh. That was the girl I fell in love with as a kid. Always willing to speak her mind and stand up for herself and her friends.
Poppy and Wren both went and checked on her after he left and assured me she was okay. They told me to give her space and that’s what I’m doing. I’m sitting downstairs while she’s upstairs and the rest of our group is down on the dock drinking and having a good time.
I’ve been staring at our text message thread for the last hour weighing my options. The girls said she needed space, but if I know her, like I think I do, what she wants right now is a hug.
I stand quickly before I have time to change my mind and make my way up to the door of her room. I pause for a few seconds before lightly tapping my fist on the wood.
“Poppy, I told you I’m fine. Please let me—” she says before the door swing opens. Her breath hitches and she stands there with her mouth slightly parted. Her blonde hair is wet like she just showered and she’s wearing the same shorts and tank top she had on this morning. A thin line of her stomach shows between the hem of her shirt and waistband of her shorts. Her e-reader is in her hand. My eyes immediately find her peaked nipples and I quickly divert my gaze back up to her emerald eyes.
“Oh, Jace. It’s you,” she says. “I thought you were Poppy.”
“No, just me.” I rub my hand over the back of my head. “I guess I was worried about you and wanted to come make sure you were okay. Thought you could use a hug or someone to talk to.”
“Oh, no, I’m fine.” Disappointment settles deep in my stomach because I was banking on getting to hug her.
“Not my first break up, if you could even call it that,” she laughs, “and it probably won’t be my last.” She shrugs and rocks back and forth on her heels.
“For the record, I wasn’t a big fan of Chris. I mean who doesn’t read romance novels?” I offer her a smile and she laughs again. “I found a cool spot earlier, want to check it out? Maybe we could talk?” I gesture over my shoulder. “If not, I get it, I understand the importance of needing to decompress alone, but I thought maybe…”
“I’d love to.”
She sets her e-reader on the dresser by the door. We walk down the hall toward my room. “Where are you taking me?”
“You trust me, pixie?”
“I’m trying to,” she says. Her honesty makes me pause for a split second. I know she knows I didn’t cheat, but it’s what she believed for a decade and I’d be an idiot if I thought the last ten years could be wiped away after one month. I walk over to one of the windows, slide it open, and climb out before leaning back inside and offering her my hand. She takes it and I pull her through to a flat part of the roof. My skin heats under her touch and I don’t want to let her go. She releases her grip once both feet are safely on the shingles.
“It’s like when we were kids,” she says with a hint of nostalgia in her voice.
The corners of my mouth tip upward and my head floods with memories of us sitting on the roof outside her window. “I thought you’d like it.” We both sit down. There’s a noticeable space between us, but we’re close enough that when I rest my forearms on my knees, my elbow brushes against the side of her legs that she has pulled up to her chest.
“You know I was planning on coming to find you tomorrow,” she admits.
“Oh yeah?”
“Well, yeah. I pinky promised I would find you if I wanted to talk,” she shrugs. “And I wanted to make sure you were okay after the song.”
Technically, she promised to find me if she needed to talk, but I don’t correct her. My heart quickens at her admission. All I’ve wanted for a decade was for her to want to talk to me and now she does.
“I was trying to get my head on straight before I rejoined the group,” she says.
She moves to lay on her back and looks up toward the night sky. I join her. The pop of a firework sounds in the distance and Tanner’s loud laugh comes from somewhere below us.
“How many nights do you think we spent out on the roof looking up at the stars?” she asks.
“No idea, but those were some of my favorites. It’s like it was our own little world away from all the noise.”
“It was, wasn’t it?”
“You know when I was on a project and I needed some space to think, I would find a place away from the team and look up at the night sky. It always helped me quiet my head.”
“What are the stars like in other parts of the world?” she asks.
“Magnificent. Especially in the really remote places with no light pollution. There seems to be millions that cover the sky. You would love it.”
“I can only imagine.” Her voice is wistful. She turns her head to look at me and I meet her gaze and she sits up suddenly. She pulls her legs back up to her chest. Her hands move up and down her crossed arms.
“Do you remember how scared Poppy was when we first started meeting outside my bedroom? I think the first three times she yelled at us from my bed to come back inside,” Lacey laughs. There were so many nights over the last ten years I wished I could hear her laugh. So many nights I wished she had been laying next to me looking up at the stars, but she wasn’t.
“Can I tell you a secret?” I ask, sitting up to look at her.
“Please do.”
“I was as scared as she was, but I didn’t want you to know.” I wince and she laughs again, slapping my leg.
“Why wouldn’t you tell me? We could’ve stayed inside.”
“Because I’d follow you anywhere you asked me to go.” Our conversation stills and she moves a little closer and rests her head on my shoulder. Our hands are so close that there is only a whisper between them. My heart rate quickens and for a split second I have the urge to kiss her forehead, but I stop myself.
“Jace?”
“Yeah?”
“Did you ever think we would get the chance to be friends again?”
Friends. The word hits me like a punch to the gut.
“Honestly, no. When I walked into that graduation party, you were the last person I thought I would see there. You?”
“No. I mean I thought about it over the years, but it was more like what I would say to you when I finally had the chance. There were a couple times before your dad moved.” She lets out a sigh. “One time, I saw your Jeep parked in his driveway and I almost worked up the courage to knock on the door, but I didn’t do it.”
“Why not? I never knew you to be afraid of anything.”
“With you it’s always been different. It sounds so silly now, but I did everything in my power to avoid you. Too many feelings, I guess.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know how to explain it.” She takes a deep breath. “My biggest fear was losing you and I guess when it came true, I didn’t know what to do or how to handle it. It was like I broke. I stopped fighting because I could no longer function. The feelings were too much for me, so I blocked you and pretended like you never existed because that was easier than accepting the fact that you broke my heart.”
“I get it. I threw myself into school and work, so I didn’t have to deal with losing you either.”
Our fingers barely touch and it sends a shock up my arm. She quickly moves her hand and sits up, so we are no longer touching. I wonder if it’s because she felt it too.
“So, what else have you been up to in the past decade? Any girlfriends?”
Her question throws me, but I try to remind myself that this is our second chance at friendship and nothing more.
“Oh. No. My last serious relationship was with a girl named Amber. We were together when Mom died and I think we stayed together longer than we should have because of it.”
“The brunette I saw in the bathroom that day.”
“Yeah, I don’t think either of us were ever fully in it, but then Mom died and I wasn’t in a great place. She didn’t end it because she didn’t want to dump the guy that just lost his mom and I didn’t end it because I didn’t care either way.”
“I get that. I’m sorry again about hiding in the bathroom.”
“I’m glad you were there.” I nudge her shoulder with mine. “So what about you? Any exes I should know about other than Chris?”
She shakes her head. “Oh, well there was one guy. I think you know him,” she giggles. “Tall and blond. Lives with you. God, what was his name?”
“No idea,” I laugh. “Come on, no other guys ever caught your eye?” The vision of her kissing Alex pops into my head and I shove it away.
She swats me with her hand. “Not really. My dating history is mostly a bunch of first dates that went nowhere. If you walk away first, you can’t get hurt, you know?” Her voice is playful, but underneath it I can hear sadness too.
“Chris was the first guy I introduced to any of my friends, but I don’t even think he qualifies as an ex-boyfriend. We hadn’t even talked about being exclusive. I knew he wasn’t the one for me, but I think part of me saw what Logan and Poppy have and I wanted that. Figured that maybe if I stuck it out we’d get there one day.”
Another moment of silence stretches between us and I think about pulling her towards me, but she stares up at the sky. The dim moonlight highlights the features of her face and the slope of her nose. She’s so fucking beautiful.
I turn back towards the dark night. “Look!” I point up above us. A shooting star flies across the sea of black. “Hurry and make a wish.” Her eyes shut and I do the same. I repeat the wish I said a decade ago. When I open my eyes, Lacey is looking right at me.
“Did you just tell me to wish on a shooting star?” A smile erupts across her face.
“What did you wish for?”
“No, you know how it works. You tell your wish and it’s all over. Ruins the magic,” she says.
“Come on, I’ll tell you mine, if you tell me yours.”
She lets out a laugh and begins to stand. “Guess you’re gonna have to stick around, J.”
“What do you mean?”
“I promise to tell you mine when it comes true.”