38. Mother Dear
J o Woohyun loved his mother so dearly that he couldn’t fathom losing her devotion to anyone else. So, when he did, the sting of her betrayal weighed heavily on him.
Woohyun couldn’t forgive her.
The way his mother hummed a beautiful lullaby to the baby in her tummy in lieu of him— find me, find me, find me where fireflies dwell, she’d croon almost every night.
She ignored his desperate pleas for her attention and looked at him as if he were a monster when she caught him breaking a rabbit’s neck and eating its raw meat without so much as a twitch. Then, on another day, she screamed at the sight of crimson dripping from his lips as he cradled the lifeless form of a white kitten.
Woohyun resented her reactions.
He hated how her gaze pierced into his own, and how she kept shouting at him, berating him for it. Why couldn’t she just love him for who he was? It was her fault he turned out like this anyway. If only she hadn’t been so consumed by her love for his baby brother and hadn’t found those stray animals on the streets and fed them. If she hadn’t made him feel like they were more important than him.
But she did. She missed his award ceremonies at school and left a void within him, a hunger for love and approval that only she could fill. She made him feel unloved.
It was Christmas when he lost control of his emotions. The festive spirit of the holiday never reached their home. There were no Christmas trees or music, no cookies for Santa, no exciting presents to look forward to.
“Woohyun,” his mother said. “I have a doctor’s appointment today, so I called Jiah to come and watch over you for a bit. Be a good boy, okay?”
“Jiah?” Woohyun looked up, frowning. “Why are you going out without me again?”
“I won’t be gone for long, sweetie. It’s for your brother,” she explained, her hands caressing her growing belly.
“But it’s Christmas,” Woohyun protested.
“Since when did you care about Christmas?” she teased with a smile dancing on her lips.
Of course, he cared. The only reason Woohyun couldn’t celebrate Christmas was because of the boundaries of his mother’s faith. It never bothered him before. But now, after breaking his heart over and over and pretending all was well, she dared tell him that she was leaving without him? Why was it so easy for her to brush him off?
When Woohyun saw the spiral of stairs behind his mother, he didn’t hesitate for a moment. He connected his hands to her chest and shoved her down the flight of stairs. Her screams echoed through the house until they faded into nothing. And when he witnessed the blood seeping through her nightgown, his lips curled into an evil smirk.
The next thing Woohyun remembered, he was at the hospital. When the doctor announced his poor mother’s demise, Woohyun just stood there like a stone, unwavering as he watched his father crumble to the ground. Everyone thought it was an accident, but for Woohyun, he simply got rid of the person who fractured his mind and heart.
Several hours went by, and Woohyun still hadn’t left his spot in the hallway. His father later joined him there.
Woohyun took note of his father’s distress—his rumpled suit, his puffy eyes, and his gaze drifting into emptiness.
Woohyun nearly laughed in amusement, but he managed to stifle the urge. “Appa, I’m really sorry she had to go,” he said without a hint of regret, “and I’m sorry my brother will never see the light of day.”
Grief appeared to have clouded his father’s judgment as he held his gaze. “Oh, son,” the old man replied, forcing a smile. “Your brother’s alive.”
Woohyun froze.
“He’s in the ICU,” Woohyun’s father added. “I named him Wooju, just like your mom wanted.”
“What?” Woohyun managed to utter, his jaw slackening.
“Sorry, I was too distracted. I forgot to tell you.” With pursed lips, his father placed a hand over his shoulder. “Let’s go see your baby brother, Woohyun.”
As the words fell upon Woohyun’s ears, a flicker of disappointment shrouded his expression.
He didn’t want to, but he still followed his father into the room, the warm lights dancing across the walls in uncanny silence. There, cozied in a crib, lay his newborn baby brother, swathed in a blanket and sleeping peacefully.
Woohyun smiled.
But not out of happiness.