38. Ivy
38
IVY
The healing wing of MistHallow is quiet in the early morning hours. I’ve been standing outside Lila’s room for ten minutes, trying to gather my courage.
Vex said she was asking to see me, but that was a few days ago. I was unconscious, but it still makes me feel guilty for not coming sooner.
But at the same time, I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready.
How do you face someone whose life you inadvertently helped destroy? Someone who was possessed and tortured because of their connection to you? The guilt sits heavy in my chest, a constant weight I can’t seem to shake.
You can do this. For Lila.
The guys offered to come with me, but this is something I need to do alone. Some conversations need to happen without witnesses.
Taking a deep breath, I push open the door.
Lila is sitting up in bed, looking through what appears to be one of MistHallow’s textbooks. She’s still pale, but there’s colour in her cheeks now, and her hands no longer flicker between realities. Her hair is pulled back in a messy bun, and she’s wearing one of the academy’s soft grey sweaters.
She looks up as I enter, and for a moment, we just stare at each other. The last time I saw her conscious, she was being controlled by Life, her eyes cold and cruel. Now they’re just Lila’s eyes. The warm brown I remember from years of friendship, currently filled with uncertainty and something that looks like hope.
“Ivy,” she says softly, closing her book. “You came.”
“Yeah.” My voice cracks. “I’m sorry it took me so long.”
“Don’t be. I understand.” She gestures to the chair beside her bed. “Will you sit?”
I move to the chair, perching awkwardly on its edge. Up close, I can see the faint traces Life left behind as subtle silver scars that spiral up Lila’s arms like frost patterns, remnants of being used as a vessel for such powerful, corrupted energy.
“How are you feeling?” I ask, then immediately want to kick myself. What a stupid question.
But Lila just gives me a small smile. “Better. Professor Blackthorn’s healing methods are intense, but effective. The episodes are less frequent now.”
“Episodes?”
She looks down at her hands. “Sometimes I still slip. Between realities. It’s like echoes of what she did to me. But they’re getting shorter, easier to control.”
Guilt crashes over me in a fresh wave. “Lila, I’m so sorry. If I had known?—”
“Stop.” Her voice is firm. “This isn’t your fault, Ivy. None of it was your fault.”
“But she chose you because of me. Because we were close.”
“She chose me because I was vulnerable and available,” Lila corrects. “And because she was a monster who enjoys destroying beautiful things. You didn’t make her do any of it.”
I swallow hard. “I should have known it wasn’t really you. All those things she made you do... the way she changed you... I should have realised something was wrong. I should’ve known you’d never fuck Kai behind my back…”
“Oh, gods!” she groans, covering her face with her hands. “She used my body like a whore. Kai wasn’t the only one… there were so many… Ivy…” She chokes back a sob, and I openly weep for her.
“I’m so sorry, Lila. Fuck. If I hadn’t been so wrapped up in my parents’ death all the time, maybe I would’ve seen it wasn’t you. But that’s no excuse. I should have known it wasn’t you.”
“How could you have known?” Lila cries. “We were eighteen, Ivy. Neither of us knew anything about possession or cosmic entities or any of this shit. We were basic shifters going about our little lives. As far as you knew, I just turned into a terrible person. It happens all the time in normal life.”
“But—”
“No buts.” She reaches for my hand, and I let her take it. Her skin is warm now, solid. Real. “I remember everything she did while wearing my face. Every cruel word, every manipulative action. The way she used Kai to hurt you, the friendships she destroyed, the chaos she caused. I remember being trapped inside myself, screaming, unable to stop any of it.”
Tears spill down my cheeks. “I’m so sorry you went through that.”
“I know. But Ivy, listen to me.” She squeezes my hand. “You saved me. You figured it out, you fought her, and you saved me. That’s what matters now.”
I squeeze her hand back, fighting through the tightness in my throat. “I missed you, the you that became my best friend. So much.”
“I missed you too.” Her smile is watery but genuine. “Even when she had control, even when I could only watch helplessly, I never stopped missing my best friend.”
The words hit me hard. Best friend. We were so close once, sharing everything from midnight snacks to our deepest secrets. Until Life ripped that away from us.
“Tell me about it?” I ask softly. “If you want to. If you can. What it was like?”
Lila is quiet for a long moment, her fingers tracing the silvery scars on her arms. “At first, it was like being underwater. Everything was muffled, distant. I could see what was happening, but it felt disconnected. Like watching a movie of my life instead of living it.”
She takes a shaky breath. “But then it got worse. She got stronger, and I got smaller. Pushed into this tiny corner of my own mind. I could feel everything she did with my body, hear every word she said with my voice, but I couldn’t stop any of it. The day you found me with Kai, I fought harder than ever. I knew what it would do to you, finding us together. I screamed and raged inside my own head until I thought I would go mad. But she just laughed. She enjoyed it, knowing how much it would hurt you.”
Tears are flowing freely down both our faces now. I move from the chair to sit on the edge of her bed, our hands still linked.
“After that, she started using my memories against me. She would replay our friendship in my mind, twisting everything, trying to make me believe I’d always been jealous of you, that I’d always wanted to hurt you. Some days... some days, I almost believed her.”
“But you didn’t,” I say fiercely. “You fought her.”
“I did. Even when it felt hopeless, even when I thought I’d be trapped forever, I kept fighting. Because I knew you. The real you. Not the version she tried to paint in my head.”
Something shifts between us then, some of the tension easing. This is still Lila - my Lila, my friend who loved silly movies and, always stole my chips and knew exactly how to make me laugh when I was sad.
“I have so much to tell you,” I say. “About everything that’s happened, about what I’ve become...”
“I know some of it. The professors talk when they think you aren’t listening.” She gives me that mischievous grin I’ve missed. “You’re kind of a big deal around here, apparently.”
I groan, making her laugh—a real laugh, one I haven’t heard in years. “I’m still me.”
“And thanks to you, I’m me again.”
She leans forward, and I wrap my arms around her. She rests her head on my shoulder, and for a moment, we’re just quiet together. I don’t understand how Lila can be so forgiving after I let her down so badly. I will have to make it up to her, but I can. I have lifetimes.
“How did you end up here?” I ask, curious.
She shakes her head. “I don’t remember much. I remember wandering around in a forest and then waking up here.”
I nod and leave it at that. I don’t want to press her, and it doesn’t really matter. The main thing is, she did come here, and they helped her.
“So,” she says finally, poking my side. “Want to tell me what you’ve been up to?”
I tell her everything. About The Syndicate, about becoming an assassin, about meeting Bram, Torin and Tate, and about how they became not just my mates but my anchors, my family. I tell her about Ramsey and Josh. About Death’s mark and Life’s betrayal and everything that followed.
She listens, asks questions, laughs at all the right parts. And slowly, piece by piece, we begin to rebuild what Life tried to destroy. Our friendship might be different now, shaped by everything we’ve been through, but maybe that’s okay. Maybe we’re both different, too. Stronger for having survived, wiser for having suffered.
Our friendship is real.
And this time, nothing—not Life, not Death, not all the power in the universe—will take it away from us again.