Wildfire Omens (Wildwood #1)

Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty-Three

Cheyenne

Rhett was spooked about whatever was in the backyard. He’d been off ever since Sheriff McGrath came by, and Ash’s alert had only made it worse. But he’d gotten so irritated when he thought I pitied him that I knew asking him about it would only make things worse.

I understood that. Dealing with trauma was a necessary part of SAR. We joined because we loved pushing ourselves and because we wanted to help save lives.

We stayed because we saw what happened when we failed.

Everyone on the team dealt with trauma differently. Some people used humor as a coping mechanism, making stupid jokes to distance themselves from the reality of seeing death up close. Others turned to each other, taking time to debrief and talk about the feelings that came up on a recovery or a search gone wrong.

But I was more like Rhett. I usually kept it to myself, dealt with it on my own. Claire and Sam would always try to draw me out and get me to talk, and I knew that was probably the healthiest thing to do. But I didn’t like letting the difficult things we did touch the rest of my life. I tried hard to leave it all on the field, to put up emotional guardrails so it didn’t creep out into my friendships and my job.

I imagined that was similar to how Rhett was feeling now. Something awful had happened to him, but he didn’t want to feel like a victim. It might not be the healthiest way of dealing with it, but I respected it anyway.

So we went back to our whiskey and leftovers and reminisced more about the past. I made sure to keep the memories to the time before we had been a couple, preferring not to dive into those emotions again. Thankfully, there were plenty of memories to choose from. From the time Claire had chosen me as her new best friend, I’d spent about half my time at Falcon Ridge Ranch. Claire and Rhett were only a year apart, and the three of us had run around like an unbreakable trio. I’d shared an innocent childhood friendship with Rhett—until I turned fifteen and our feelings for each other changed. Then Rhett had given me my very first kiss and the entire world had shifted on its axis.

After dinner, we headed out to the front with the bottle of whiskey. We sat in the dark, legs dangling off the porch—just like we used to when he would come to visit and we wanted to talk out of Gran’s earshot. It brought back a thousand memories, and I realized they didn’t hurt quite as much as they used to.

Rhett put his hand over mine. “Tonight was fun.”

“Yeah.” My heart fluttered. “It really was.”

“Do you have to work tomorrow?”

I stared at our hands, still connected, and realized I didn’t want to pull away. “I really should. I haven’t touched base with Travis yet, but Saturdays are big tourism days at the ranch. Since the neurologist gave you such a good report, I should probably get back to my normal schedule.”

It was the best thing, but it brought a pang of regret. Spending the day with Rhett had been so nice that I no longer wanted to put distance between us.

All I wanted was to be with him.

“Maybe I could go with you,” he suggested.

I shook my head. “You know you aren’t supposed to ride yet, and the doctor wants you to ease back into things, not jump in full force.”

He waved me off. “I’m not talking about working cattle or even going out on the trail with you. As bored as I was these past few days, I bet Dad’s going nuts having to be cooped up for weeks. Maybe I’ll go play cards with him or something.”

The idea caught me off guard. “Would you really do that?”

“Sure. Why not?”

“You and your dad have never really gotten along that well.” I couldn’t keep the skepticism out of my voice.

Walker was a good man, one I genuinely liked. But he and Rhett were like oil and water. Walker had never understood why Rhett, Cole, and Finn couldn’t love the ranch the way he did, and he’d never known how to connect with them the way he connected with Travis. I had always felt frustrated by how little he tried to reach out to his other sons. He was their dad, yet he put the pressure of the relationship on them.

As someone who’d been abandoned by my own father, his attitude toward them made it hard for me to fully respect him.

“I know.” Rhett took a swig of his drink and looked away. “But it turns out that when you think you’re going to die, you see things differently. Maybe I want to try again.”

My heart melted. “I think that’s great. You know, Walker’s changed over the years, too. He’s not as hard as he used to be. Maybe it’s a good opportunity for you guys to build a new relationship.”

“If he’s softer, it’s probably because Travis has taken on so much of the burden of the ranch.” Rhett frowned. “I honestly hadn’t realized how much of that weight he carried.”

“It’s his dream.”

“It is. But he reminds me of how Dad used to be. Stressed, miserable, always juggling too many things. Only Travis doesn’t have a woman like Mom easing that burden.”

I was surprised by the worry on his face—and touched by how concerned he was for his brother. “Why, Rhett Hawkins, I think you’re turning into a softie,” I said, teasing him.

“Ain’t nothing soft about me, honey.” He grinned, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

My face flushed crimson.

“Well, on that note, I think I’ll head to bed,” I said, pushing off the porch and standing.

“Want company?” He grinned again.

“I think not.” I shot him a look. “We’re friends, Rhett. That’s it.”

His grin fell. “And what if I want to try again there, too?”

I felt caught, torn between my head and my heart. My head said it was a terrible idea and would only end with me broken again.

But my heart had already fallen back in love. It had happened so easily that I wasn’t sure I’d ever really stopped loving him at all.

“I don’t know,” I whispered.

He stood, facing me. “What’s it going to take? I know you don’t trust me. I know you think I’m going to pack up and leave again without even saying a word. But I’m not. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

“I want to believe you.” I wanted it so badly that it broke my heart in two. “And it means something to me that you tried to call all those years ago. It really does. But you still gave up. You gave up, and when you came back to visit, you never even tried to see me. I just—”

“That’s not true, either,” he said, anger flaring in his eyes as he shook his head.

I crossed my arms. “Rhett, I wasn’t hard to find. If you wanted to see me, you could have.”

“The first time I came back to Wyoming, I drove straight here,” he said, taking a step toward me. “Hadn’t even slept yet. But you were gone. Gran told me you were out camping with Sam.”

I jerked my head. “She said what ?”

“You heard me. Seemed like you’d moved on pretty damn quick.”

“No.” I shook my head. “Gran encouraged me to join the search-and-rescue team. Claire and I did it together, and Sam tried out at the same time. We trained together and became good friends. Any camping trip she mentioned would have been SAR training. But that was all. It’s never been more.”

He gazed at me with a look that was unreadable. “Never more? What about when Gran died? When Claire told me, I got on my bike and rode all night so I could be here for the funeral.”

My heart raced. “You weren’t there.” I couldn’t believe it, yet… Hadn’t I felt him with me that day? Hadn’t that ache bloomed even deeper because I’d sensed him near?

“Yeah, I was.” He stepped forward again, dangerously close. “You wore a black turtleneck dress that went all the way to the ground, but you still had on your cowboy boots. Your mom was there, but she’d brought a new boyfriend and didn’t even attempt to comfort you. You held on to a single rose from the casket, gripping it like you were holding on for dear life.”

My breath caught. He had been there. But it didn’t make sense. I shook my head. “But… Why didn’t you talk to me?”

“Because you were there in the front row, with Claire on one side and Sam on the other, both guarding you like they were your personal protection. After the service, I started to walk up to you. But they were lowering Gran into the ground, and you started crying. Sam pulled you into a hug. He saw me. Gave me a glare that told me to back off. I knew I wasn’t wanted, so I left.”

Tears came before I could stop them. “I can’t believe you came.”

“Cheyenne, I may not have wanted to get married and settle down into life on the ranch, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t love you. I knew Gran’s funeral was going to be the hardest day of your life. She was the only real mom you had. Nothing would have stopped me from showing up and being there for you. But when I got there, it seemed like you didn’t need—or want—me after all. Sam had taken my place.”

I turned away from him, not wanting him to see the tears that fell down my cheeks. I was so angry. Angry at Gran for what looked like deliberate sabotage. Angry at Sam, which wasn’t fair at all.

And angry at myself for believing the worst when I had known Rhett better than that.

“So tell me what I did wrong,” he said. His voice let me know he was angry too. “Because it seems like you’ve been mad at me for all these years over something I didn’t even do. Tell me, Cheyenne: What should I have done different?”

“You should have asked me to go with you,” I whispered before turning to walk away again.

He grabbed me, yanking me to him. Thunder clapped, like the pure electricity between us had sparked, spurring one of Wyoming’s famous storms. We both glanced at the sky before looking back at each other as rain drops began falling onto our faces.

“I’m asking you now,” he said. He closed his eyes and brought his forehead to mine, gripping the back of my neck with his hand. “Cheyenne,” he breathed before putting his lips over mine.

It was everything—and somehow more. As familiar as it had once been and yet new at the same time. The way his lips fit mine, the way he held me, the way it felt to be pressed up against him… So familiar. But this Rhett was different. Older. More sure of himself. He kissed me like he knew exactly what he wanted, exactly where this was going. It was passion and a promise.

And so help me God, I couldn’t stop myself from melting into it. From almost sighing at how utterly wonderful it felt to be held by him again, to be loved by him again.

I ran my hands up his back as he wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer. His fingers slipped underneath my shirt, tracing the skin on my lower back and sending shivers up my spine.

“Rhett.” I breathed the word like a prayer.

“Please say yes,” he said before covering my mouth with his again so that I couldn’t say anything at all.

So I simply nodded.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the porch, then into the house. Ash followed, shaking herself when she got inside and sending a spray of water over us. We both grinned. Nothing could dampen the pure joy that surged between us.

He interlaced his fingers in mine and tugged me toward my bedroom. When we got to the doorway, he gave me a hesitant look. “Tell me if I’m crossing any lines here. I don’t want to screw things up again.”

“You couldn’t,” I said in a whisper.

He gave me a look so full of meaning I thought my heart was going to explode.

“I’ve missed you,” he said.

“I’ve missed you, too.” More than I could possibly say.

He led me inside, then pulled me to him, kissing me again. “I used to imagine this,” he whispered against my neck before trailing kisses along my collarbone. “Used to think about what it would be like if we ever got together again.”

“I did, too. Until it became too painful to even imagine.”

“I’m sorry.” Regret filled his eyes.

“Me too. Rhett, even at Gran’s funeral… I wanted you. I wanted you so much that when I felt you there, I convinced myself I was just aching for it. Sam was only ever a friend. Never more. If I’d have known you were there…” My voice broke at the words.

“Shhh,” he said. “It doesn’t matter now, does it? Even if you had been together, it doesn’t matter. We can’t change what happened. We can only start from here. It’s the future that matters now. You and me.”

“You and me,” I whispered.