Chapter 37
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Zedediah
Isit on the edge of my bed, unsure of when or how I made it back to my room.
The fabric of my clothes, saturated with Fenris’ blood, clings to me.
I played video after video showing his vile transgressions.
But after watching the second most recent video, the one that showed Melinda restrained to the same table Lucy spent her last moments strapped to, I couldn’t stomach anymore and had to pull away.
Once I found Melinda and buried her body in the graveyard, the sun was just beginning to peek through the trees.
I’ve been sitting here staring at the floor for hours. Fenris didn’t only play god, he needed proof of his power. Like if he captured it on tape, it made it all real. There were hidden cameras nestled in every corner of the property, labeled as sermons.
I thought I knew what he was, but I couldn’t have imagined the depravity that was in his bones.
So many buried questions were answered. But for every question his videos answered, two more took their place. I think back to Lucy and Jonah. Fenris wasn’t punishing me for my slip up. He was punishing Jonah. He wanted him to suffer, to break. He did the one thing that would do just that.
Why didn’t Jonah say anything about his plans? I could’ve helped. I would have.
I tuck the USB I downloaded the information to in my pocket and think of the faces I haven’t seen in years. The people we were made to believe had run from the fellowship, but hadn’t.
In many videos, I saw my own, much younger, face.
I don’t remember them but there I was, doing exactly what he told me to.
The death this place has witnessed in the last forty-eight hours is its own cross to bear.
I feel like a man who has woken up in hell, realizing he helped build it.
But I didn’t. I was bred into it. Finally letting my exhausted body give up, I pull my knees to my chest and tell myself over and over it’s not real.
It’s not real. And then I cry until everything goes quiet.
I decide it’s time and push myself off my bed, not bothering to brush the dirt off that I’ve been laying in. I grab my duffel bag, tossing it on the bed.
Going into the bathroom, I retrieve my hidden stash of cash.
It’s wrapped in a plastic bag and hidden in the toilet tank.
I walk back over and start tossing things in.
A few clothes, the bag with the cash, and Cat’s necklace.
She must’ve dropped it when she was fighting Fenris.
My hand lingers over the gun for a second before shoving it into my bag.
I zip it up before tossing it over my shoulder.
She can run as far as she wants, but she’ll never run far enough for me to let her go.