Zoinks! Nice Pack, Bro

36. Please Please Please

CHAPTER 36

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

Sadie

C ameron’s hand runs through my hair as he reads some emails and responds to them on his phone. His fingers rub at my scalp as I lay against his stomach, body positioned between his legs on the couch in the main room of the cabin.

I was reading on my phone but I think I fell asleep and now am blinking away the sleep that still clings to my eyes. Trying to wake myself up.

Paxton had to head back home this morning to deal with a project in person for the week and it was a wakeup call for me. A reminder that this is just a temporary reprise from life and that we were going to have to go back to it sooner than later. I hated him leaving but was almost thankful that it made real life come back.

Sometimes I can get so lost in my mind that reality feels fake. Being grounded by it happening was a reminder to me to make sure I’m living in it.

“You hungry, brat?” I smirk, turning my head as I look at Cameron. His phone is away now and all his attention is on me as he capitalizes the time that we aregetting together.

Jace dragged Anthony out this morning telling him that he had to fix fences while Cam had been feeding me and had been deemed too busy to help them with manual labor.

Something that he was more than okay with.

I nod my head at the promise of food, shifting up and stretching my aching body from the nap that I had on the couch. My shirt rises just enough that Cam has the ability to grab it, tugging it up as his hand lands on my stomach.

I may have lost weight but I’m still soft there and can feel the way my cheeks are blooming in embarrassed heat. But if these men have taught me anything it’s that they like my body and if I even act like I don’t like a part of me they’ll spend all their time worshiping that part of me and making me fall in love with it.

“All I can think about is how pretty you’d look full of our baby,” I have never in my life wanted to have children.

I donate to Planned Parenthood yearly thinking that if I ever had an accident and my birth control failed that I would have no problem making the decision that was right for me.

Right now in my life, I am such a mess. It’s not just this journey for me to get better. I don’t know if getting better is really in the cards for me. I’ll always have days where I’m not feeling 100%. I’ll have moments that will set off my anxiety and make me freeze or panic because of it. Sure, I’m getting help to deal with these things now but the idea of bringing a child into it when my wrist is still stitched up from my way of handling my emotions makes me cringe.

Maybe one day I’ll be able to handle it all. Or maybe one day I’ll know how to handle some of it and let my alphas handle the rest. But everyone can be certain that it is not today.

But the way that Cam is stroking my stomach with his thumb and giving me these ideas that have me suddenly very invested in the breeding kink picture he is selling makes me want to take out my IUD and let these men fill me with babies.

Maybe when we’re home and have a few months together under our belts I can think about that.

“All swollen with our child, your big tits full of milk.”

His other hand pulls up my shirt over my tits, a finger tracing my nipple as I’m suddenly getting images of him and Jace sucking my tits while Paxton kisses my swollen stomach and Anthony keeps going inside of me through it all.

Well, sign me up for this.

“I want that with you, a future. A bond bite. Babies. I want it all with you, Sadie baby.” Cam’s eyes are on mine as he sits so we’re facing each other. My shirt falling back over my breasts to cover them. His warm hand switched from my stomach to my back to pull me closer to him, “Because I love you.”

Holy Shit.

Oh frick.

He said-

I don’t even let myself get sucked into overthinking as I cup Cam’s cheek, looking at him right now. He’s vulnerable and willing to be in front of me.

“Good because I love you too.”

Seeing Cam smile, a real smile, is like watching the sun rise over the ocean. All the colors of the world glistening in a golden hue as they sparkle and ignite the world on fire. Except I am the world and I’m on fire.

He hugs me, doesn’t kiss me, just holds me to him like I’m the most precious thing in the world. And I soak it up, every second of comfort.

“You’re always going to be safe with us, Sadie love.” His promise makes me burrow into him deeper, clinging to him because I’m scared. Scared because I believe the words he is telling me.

“I want to go home now. With you. With Jace. With Ant. With Daddy Pax. I want to be with all of you because I love all of you. Is that okay?” I look at Cam, his kind eyes on mine as he smirks, nodding his head at me.

“With you, Sadie? Yeah. I think that’s exactly how things were meant to be.”

Apparently, as soon as you tell someone you want to go home they just book plane tickets, pack your things and take you home.

It’s that simple .

Maybe I should have given the whole having alphas thing a shot sooner. Not that I had luck but having them helping and anticipating my needs is amazing.

The relief in my everyday life is unparalleled.

Mornings I wake up curled with an alpha or four. Someone starts to make breakfast and someone moves to help me shower or get ready for the day, depending on what’s going on. My coffee order is always perfect and my medication is always there so I don’t forget it. No one says anything when I take my pills but I have noticed Cam takes his with me now so I don’t feel like I’m in this alone.

Days on the ranch have been treating my touch starvation from prior years. They treat me like a newborn, all of the alphas trying to give me skin to skin contact. Cuddles on the couch, riding horses, picnics by the lake. Whatever we’re doing it’s usually with a shirtless alpha who makes quick work of my clothing.

I eat three meals a day. I’m constantly being handed a drink of water. Fancy metal water bottles have become the newest accessory for the boys to carry. People say it improves your skin and attitude to be hydrated. I have mastered squatting to pee outside because of the constant flow of water.

Nights after dinner are spent watching movies or playing board games, even though Anthony always cheats and Cameron literally threatens to beat him up after a rather vicious three hour game of Risk. But I like having a warm drink and being in my alphas hoodies to get comfortable. Before bed some nights Paxton will give me long baths where he reads to me and spoils me. Or some nights Jace will lay with me and point out all the stars. On nights I feel to wound up, Cam and Ant make me a sandwich, using me as the filling until I’m so exhausted that all I can do is sleep.

It’s been ideal on the ranch but headed home, that’s what the pack house is to me now, that’s what I want.

In all the things they did to leave the ranch, like book tickets and inform Jace’s family we were leaving they forgot a big step. What they didn’t do was warn Paxton that we were headed home.

He is in his office when I throw open the door, his head coming up so quickly as he looks taken off guard. He didn’t even have a chance to stand up before I rushed to him, throwing myself in his arms and burying my head in his neck as I breathed him in.

It hadn’t even been long and I missed him.

“Princess.” There is slight confusion in his tone as I cling to him, squeezing him tight as he seems to get the message and hold me tighter in his embrace. “You’re home.” The words hit me so hard as I sniffled back a sound that was building in my throat.

Home .

Yeah, I am home now.

“A little heads up would have been nice,” He is talking to someone over my head and I can picture Ant and Cam shrugging without care. Jace’s face as he watches us together makes me smirk. I blossom under the attention. “Are you hungry, little Sadie?”

“Yeah. Can we go out? Just us?”

I never really asked for one on one time with the guys. It happens a lot because they all respect each other. I think they usually plan it when they want the time but me asking was a new one for them to handle.

Pax looks at me, standing up with me in his arms as he sends a look to the guys who all just seemed to get out of our way. No one is going to tell me or him no if I’m asking for one on one time. They know that we’re back here because I want my whole pack together. I made it clear on the plane ride that I don’t like the idea of us being separated with one of us off on a project.

I’ve been alone for a long time and the idea of one of my alphas having to be alone doesn’t sit right with me. Especially when I know he has his pack mates and me who want to be with him.

And I love that.

Loved how they knew what I needed and weren’t afraid to give it to me. Even when I wasn’t always clear with them they could still read me better than I could read myself.

“Of course. Let’s go, Sadie Sweetheart.”

Paxton wastes no time leaving the house and drives us without direction. His hand on my thigh and my hand covering his as the music from the radio plays in the background without us seeming to care what is actually on. It is nice just being near him .

Finally, he turns off the road towards a parking lot that is overlooking the ocean. Waves crash in the background against a rocky shore and both of us just watch the way the ocean comes in and then pulls back out. A constant give and take of nature.

It was time.

“I love you,” Paxton’s head turns, looking at me as I speak. I feel myself swallowing as I look up at him. Not afraid of being rejected but feeling the weight of his eyes on me as he looked at me like he was in shock from my words.

His eyes look into mine like he is making sure for me that I am being honest but this was the realest I’ve ever been. I know he’s been hurt before but I need him to look at me, his omega, and know that I was as dedicated to him as one could be. I was going to love this man for the rest of his life.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” I confirm with a smile, “I love you and I love Ant, Jace, and Cam. I love you all individually and I love all of you together. I want to be your omega.”

I need him to know that. That it’s all of them that I need. And the way his eyes crinkle in a smile as he looks at me like I just made his day makes me know that I made the right choice telling him how I feel.

“You’re the love of my life, princess. We’re a family. All of us. And we’re always going to love you.”

Reaching across the seat, Paxton pulls me on his lap. He is just holding me as we look out, rain starting now as the ocean seems to get wilder but I’m calm. I feel complete. I’m exactly where I am supposed to be.

My love. My alpha. He’s mine.

Mine .

His lips kiss down my neck, as I let out a soft whine. All I can think about is his teeth in my skin. The idea of a bond snapping in place and being able to always feel him and carry him with me is overwhelming.

As if Pax knows what I’m thinking he nips at my neck. Peaches filling the car as I breathe in a shaky breath in a weak attempt to try and get myself under control. It’s not working when I’m in such close quarters with my alphas .

“I can’t wait to bond with you.” His teeth scrape over my throat again as I suck in a breath. Hands digging in his light hair as I let myself nuzzle into his neck, breathing in my alphas rich scent. Letting myself be comforted by him.

“Together. I want you all to bond me together.” Pax nods his head. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

As the leader of the pack, he values the relationship as much as me and I know that this is what it’s supposed to be like. This is what has been missing.

Now I have it all.