Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
SAM
Day Two
Will gasps, clutching his phone.
‘What is it?’
He says nothing, his eyes scanning his screen, bringing it closer to his face. I pause, holding my wine glass, surrounded by the noise of bustle. We’re sitting outside a Greek restaurant, waiting for two Caesar salads to arrive.
‘I just got a text from Ollie,’ Will says.
My chest tightens and I drink my wine. ‘Oh?’
‘He asked me what hotel I’m at.’
‘Are you planning to tell him?’
I bite my tongue, anticipating what his response might be.
‘Should I? Tell him that I’m staying at a naked hotel?’
‘It’s up to you.’
‘Maybe he’ll think I’m weird.’ Will places a finger to his lips, tapping them. I try not to stare, but his lips are the perfect shape. ‘Should I?’
‘Up to you,’ I reply.
‘I’m aware this is all pretty boring to you.’
Shit. Maybe I should summon enthusiasm for Will to meet his ex again. ‘Boring?’
‘Me and my relationship problems,’ Will says. ‘Not that there is even a relationship to have a problem with. Well, it’s a bit more complex, isn’t it? I don’t know. You don’t need to be roped into it.’
‘I roped myself into it by volunteering to be your plus one,’ I say. ‘I’m in too deep now.’
Our salads arrive, carried by a handsome waiter that both Will and I check out as he walks away.
We exchange a glance, and then dig into our greens.
On the chair next to us lounges a short-haired black and white cat who hasn’t opened its eyes once.
Every now and then I look at its chest to make sure it’s still breathing, which it is.
‘I should try more food that isn’t salad,’ Will says, crunching leaves. ‘But this is too good.’
People stroll by us on the street, residents and tourists alike. There are more stray cats eyeing the restaurant, looking for what they can scrounge. I imagine our black and white cat here has this restaurant as its domain.
‘Are you happy here?’
Will’s question is like burning my hand on the coffee machine. ‘Why do you ask?’
‘Just asking,’ Will says. ‘To me, I’d love a life like this. Blue skies, trendy restaurants.’
‘Isn’t Cardiff like that?’
‘It can be, but mostly it’s grey. And don’t get me started on when big events come to town and you’d rather be anywhere else. When Oasis came it was a nightmare.’
‘I don’t mind Oasis.’
Will blinks. ‘Are you sure you’re not straight?’
I laugh, thinking about his original question. ‘I like my job, but do you ever ask if there’s something more?’
‘All the goddamn time,’ Will says.
I extend my hand. ‘There you go, then.’
‘But that can’t be it?’
‘Why can’t it?’
‘I don’t know, it just can’t,’ Will says. ‘Up there you said you thought about leaving. Why don’t you?’
‘Complacency. Life passing me by.’
‘You’re thirty, not eighty.’
‘I feel eighty.’ And I feign an injury as I stretch.
Will nudges me, shaking his head. ‘Do your dreams lie in being a barista?’
I chuckle. ‘Not particularly.’
‘Then what?’
I bristle. ‘I never went beyond secondary school, and even there I felt like a bit of a dunce.’ I fork tomato, seeing the juice pop out. ‘Later in life I’ve made it my mission to learn more and read more, but yeah, it wasn’t the best.’
‘What? So you feel like you can’t go and do something else?’
I can feel my neck heating, and allow my hair to cover it. ‘Like I say, I’ve got complacent.’
‘What would you do instead?’
‘I’d like to travel,’ I say, no hesitation. ‘And paint.’
‘That’s something. You should do it, Sam. Where would you go?’
‘Skopelos,’ I say, picking the name at random.
‘I know nothing about it.’
‘They filmed some of Mamma Mia there.’
‘Ollie and I loved that movie,’ Will says, and I wish I hadn’t mentioned it. ‘Oh, I need to add that to my list.’
An idea forms as I stretch out. ‘Maybe we could go together. One day.’
His eyes light up, and he claps his hands together. ‘I’d love that.’
I’ve never resented my life, but I do feel frustration. I’m happy, but wistful. Like I’m craving a life that could have been but never was. Maybe it is time to think about what it is I want.
‘Sometimes I wish we hadn’t come here.’
‘But then you wouldn’t have No Name.’
‘Exactly.’ I toss the salad in my bowl, lost in thought. ‘Maybe I’d have something in Wales, or the UK. Maybe I’d have a franchise. I thought about franchising No Name, maybe taking it through Greece, but that’s a lot of effort, and I work enough as it is.’
‘You work a lot, then?’ Will asks.
‘This is the first day I’ve had off in a while,’ I tell him.
‘Why?’
‘I wanted to be with you.’
It’s daring of me to say it, but it’s the truth.
‘I’m not distracting you from work, am I?’ The way he asks it feels shy.
‘Not at all. I think you’re the distraction I needed.’
Will is my vacation, my holiday destination.
Will stares at me, and I can feel my own heart thudding. But nothing is said as the waiter comes over, checking if everything is okay.
Will leans back, tearing his eyes away from mine. ‘Best salad and wine ever.’
‘I’m pleased,’ the waiter says.
Will’s phone buzzes with another text message, and I see him withdraw into the world of digital.
‘He’s asking if I want a drink tonight.’
‘Do you?’
But Will’s already texting, finger and thumbs hitting the screen.
He puts his phone down, a tense expression on his face.
‘I’m meeting Ollie tonight,’ Will blurts.
‘Oh.’ My shoulders sag, but I quickly recover, reaching for my wine.
‘I’ve got to speak to him.’
‘Right.’ My eyes scan the restaurant, meeting the waiters. ‘Can we get the bill?’
He nods.
‘We’re going?’ Will asks, dabbing at his mouth with a napkin.
‘I’m going,’ I say, knowing my tone is harsh. ‘I should go help Mum.’
‘But you said—’
‘I know. But I think you should get ready for your date tonight.’
Will looks at his phone mumbling, ‘Not a date.’
Am I being harsh? Potentially. But he’s excited for his evening, and I can’t sit here right now and listen to it.
I want to get as far away from here as possible. ‘Right.’
Will looks at me, hesitant. ‘Want me to update you on what he says?’
‘Yeah. Do that.’ I get to my feet, seeing Will stiffen. Yeah, I’m being a dick. It’s not Will’s fault. ‘Catch up tomorrow?’
He relaxes, finally smiling. ‘Yes, please.’