Chapter 42
Chapter Forty-Two
WILL
Day Twelve
‘I’m super sick,’ I groan. ‘I simply can’t come in.’
Somehow, I’ve caught Clive’s inflections.
He sighs on the other end of the phone as I sit on the harbour, counting boats as they sail out to sea. Hopefully, he can’t hear the early morning bustle of Athens.
‘What is it?’
‘Still the flu.’ I sniff. ‘But I think it might be getting worse.’
‘Worse?’
‘I’m aching all over, Clive,’ I say, almost adding Sly before his name. ‘I’ve been bed-ridden all day. It might be the plague.’
‘What plague?’
‘Bubonic,’ I say.
‘I’m pretty sure they eradicated the bubonic plague,’ Clive retorts.
‘Oh, I don’t know about that. It’s actually still a problem and people still get infected by it. You should see the spot on my back.’
‘I’m all right, thank you,’ Clive near enough shouts. ‘Well, I don’t know who we’re going to get to do the Word docs.’
‘Excel spreadsheets,’ I correct.
‘Sorry?’
‘It’s on Excel, not Word doc.’
‘Yes, like it matters.’ Clive confirms what I already knew: my job could implode tomorrow and nothing would change at the company. Programmes would be animated; children’s shows would make it to air. It makes me feel less guilty selling him my implausible story of the bubonic plague.
‘You realise we have a new member of staff starting?’ Clive asks me.
‘Oh?’
‘Yes. She is an admin officer,’ Clive says.
‘Even though there might be job redundancies?’
‘We need an admin officer.’
‘I see.’
‘I suppose I have no choice but to ask her to do the Word doc.’
‘Tell her it’s Excel, and she’ll be good to go.’
‘Sorry?’ Clive asks. ‘I lost you there. Did you say she would excel?’
‘I did, Clive, yes. She will excel.’
‘I’m glad you think so. Well, keep me posted, and get well soon.’
He hangs up and I sigh with relief, grateful to return to my plague-free life. It’s 9 am, the day only just starting in the city. Boats gather excited people for the day cruises, including the pirate ship, where memories of getting close to Sam are now so far away.
‘Oh, it’s you.’
I turn to see who has spoken.
‘Hi, Lydia.’
The early morning sun highlights the contours of her skin, the freckle on her cheek and her red lipstick.
Her black hair is tied up, exposing her sleek neck, where a golden necklace glimmers.
‘You’re not nude,’ she comments.
I look at my body, glad I remembered to put on clothes. I’m naked so often in the hotel that it’s feeling like second nature. ‘Should I be?’
‘Tim and Jemima,’ she says. ‘They told me all about the life drawing class that they went to, and how sorry they were I wasn’t there.’
Tim and Jemima. Not only are they so open, but they’re bloody gossips. In one horrible second, I realise that somewhere, both of them possess a portrait of naked me.
‘You were meant to be there?’
‘Oh, they didn’t tell you?’ Lydia asks. ‘I recommended the class to them. I was supposed to be the life model.’
My mouth drops. Lydia, the life model?
With a flash, I remember the leaflet Lydia gave me, life drawing classes advertised inside. What an entrepreneur Lydia is.
‘Wow. What a small world.’
‘Yes, I thought so, too,’ Lydia says. ‘Jemima and Tim had very kind words to say about you.’ I cringe at the memory of Tim’s description of my anatomy. ‘Thank you for stepping in at the last minute.’
‘I didn’t have a choice,’ I say. ‘My boy … friend, my friend’s mum…’
Are we boyfriends? Sure, Sam said he’d like to be, but we haven’t confirmed it.
‘His mum asked me to step in,’ I manage.
Just because you suck a man’s dick and then get fucked by him doesn’t mean you’re instantly boyfriends and getting ready for a life of matrimony. No, this could be gay culture striking again. Sam could be one of those casual, open guys. We could be just fooling around and that’s that.
Or maybe we are on the other side of the gay coin, at the early stages of working each other out in new settings.
With Ollie, it took some weeks before we had ‘the talk’.
That talk was over too many sambuca shots and ended with us agreeing to be boyfriends.
With Sam, I feel like it would be different. Should be different.
‘Are you cruising?’
My eyes widen. ‘Is this a cruising spot?’
Lydia points to a pink boat, one that didn’t have anyone on board yet. ‘Boats.’
‘Oh, that cruising,’ I mutter. ‘No, not cruising. Are you?’
‘The pink palace.’ Lydia points again at the pink boat.
‘It looks sweet.’
‘You wouldn’t like it.’
‘Why not?’
She curls a strand of hair behind her ear. ‘It’s a boat for nude people.’
‘I’m all about nudist life now.’
Lydia giggles again, holding her stomach.
‘What’s so funny?’
‘You are funny.’
I blink, thrown off guard by her laughter that is so loud it might wake all the nearby hotels.
Her laughter peters out as she looks at me questioningly. ‘You don’t seem in a fun mood.’
‘What makes you say that?’
‘You are sitting by the sea on your own,’ Lydia states, gesturing around the deserted harbour front. ‘And I know what that means.’
At my blank expression, she sighs.
‘You’re thinking about something,’ she says, taking a seat next to me. ‘Deeply. My mother used to do it.’
As if proving her point, my vision glazes over as the small waves lap the side of the pink palace.
‘Well, I’m having boy problems.’
‘Still?’
She snickers.
‘I mean, problems with a boy,’ I say. ‘Or actually, men. Two men.’
‘Men are always a problem,’ Lydia says. ‘No offence.’
‘None taken,’ I say. How can I tell her I wasn’t a problem, without being one of those ‘not all men’ guys? I choose brutal honesty. ‘There’s been a development in the marriage I came here for.’
‘You wrecked it?’
‘No! If you must know, your voice of reason made me see sense and … well, now I’m going to be the one marrying them at the altar.’ Lydia’s laughter is shrill, and I shake my head. ‘Yes, go on, laugh at my expense.’
‘No, I think it is a good thing.’
‘The thing is, his partner, Alec, doesn’t know I dated Ollie.
And I’ve told Ollie that one of my conditions to marrying them is that Alec has to know.
Ollie promised to tell him, but I don’t know if he will.
We’re doing a double date tonight, and this is another thing.
I’ve started sleeping with my best friend. ’
‘You get around,’ Lydia says, eyebrow quirked.
‘Are you sex-shaming me?’
‘Absolutely not.’
Oddly, I believe her. ‘Okay.’
‘I just don’t understand the dilemma.’
‘Well, I came here for my ex, but now I’m sleeping with the guy who used to be my best friend, who I was fake-dating for Ollie’s benefit, and now, I’m marrying my ex to someone else.
Add into that that my life back home is probably going to implode, that I’ve been lying to my boss about being sick, and that my job is on the line…
I don’t know what I’m going to do about all of this.
’ I sigh. ‘I can’t believe I came here thinking I’d win Ollie back. ’
‘A stupid thing to do and think.’
This time, I don’t think she’s joking.
‘Do you like this friend?’ she asks, turning on the bench to face me.
‘Massively.’
‘But you are worried sleeping with him will ruin your friendship?’
‘Sleeping with Sam was phenomenal.’
‘I don’t need to know,’ Lydia says, holding up a hand. ‘I don’t—’
‘Concern yourself with the particulars.’ She gives me an incredulous look. ‘Everything has changed so quickly.’
‘Things always change,’ she says.
‘I haven’t changed.’
‘I don’t know you well, but I think you have changed since you checked into the hotel.’
I make a sceptical noise, and Lydia shrugs.
‘What I mean is’—I try to explain my own confused thoughts—‘the things I feel for him are … things I haven’t felt in a long time.’
‘You’re not in love already, are you?’
‘No, of course not.’ She might be right. But only psychopaths fall in love in a week. ‘But Sam is Sam. It’s like we never lost touch.’
Lydia eyes the pink boat for any signs of movement. She crosses her arms and looks at me.
‘You want something a little more with this Sam man?’
‘I think so.’
‘Then tell him.’
I look out at the glistening ocean. It all sounds so simple when she puts it that way. ‘This is all make-believe. Pretend. I have a life back home that’s a dumpster fire. A real life. Not this.’
‘Life can be whatever you want it to be. If the ex is out of the picture, why are you waiting?’ Lydia asks. ‘That is my biggest regret.’
‘What is?’
A dreamlike expression transforms Lydia’s face.
‘Agnes was the girl of my dreams,’ Lydia says. ‘We did everything together. She made me the happiest I have ever been. We were together at a time when we were both finding things out about ourselves. And then I messed it up.’
‘How did you mess it up?’
‘I got scared.’ Lydia stares out at sea, and I picture her mother doing the same thing, maybe in this exact spot. ‘We were young. Foolish, I suppose. She was always so much more fun than me. At eighteen, she wanted to travel. She asked me to come with her. I said no. I never saw her again.’
‘Didn’t you keep in touch?’
‘I tried,’ Lydia says, adopting a wistful tone. ‘But she travelled and we tried to keep in touch, but it wasn’t the same. Travelling changes you. She forgot about me, but I never forgot about her.’
Lydia gives a resigned sigh.
‘I’m sorry.’
‘Don’t be,’ Lydia says. ‘It was a long time ago.’
‘There’s no time limit on how long to grieve losing someone.’ I repeat Sam’s ethos.
‘You’re right,’ Lydia says. ‘It still hurts. There hasn’t been another girl like her.’
‘That was how I felt about Ollie. Until…’
‘Sam,’ Lydia finishes the sentence for me.
‘That’s right.’ And your words giving me nightmares.
The pink boat’s doors open and a man steps out. He must be in his thirties, judging by his complexion, though he’s got grey hair that doesn’t look natural. He waves at Lydia, clearly recognising her, and she waves back, getting to her feet.
‘If that’s how Sam makes you feel, don’t let him go,’ Lydia says firmly.
‘Thanks, Lydia.’
She turns to the sea. I do, too. Both of us lost in thoughts of those we let play with our hearts.
‘I’ll see you around.’ She makes to leave, then turns back. ‘Actually, come to the Taste of Athens restaurant tomorrow night. There’s a celebration going on there. Greek plate smashing. If you’ve never seen it, it’s worth it. Bring along Sam. Be my guests.’
I give Lydia my cheesiest grin. ‘Are we friends now, Lydia?’
‘Don’t push it.’
‘Okay. Sure. I’ll be there.’
‘Avrio,’ Lydia waves, blowing a kiss.
She approaches the boat at the same time as another couple. They all greet one another with familiarity, and as they climb on board, it makes me miss Alice and home.