Chapter 6 Confidence
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Confidence
José stepped onto the street and lit a cigarette.
By now, it had gotten dark. His limbs still felt stiff; the drive back to L.A.
had taken longer than hoped. But since it was unclear if Tristan would be out today, and when, he decided to take the car instead, even though the label would have been willing to pay for a flight.
He took a drag of the cigarette, walked a few steps, and exhaled the smoke.
This moment was worth savoring. After what felt like a hundred failed attempts to quit smoking, he had finally found a promising strategy.
He had reduced his consumption to one cigarette a day—a significant achievement, considering he used to smoke a pack daily.
Discipline was key. So was exercise. Without his rigorous training, he wouldn’t have made it this far.
Now, he used these moments to mentally prepare for the very last cigarette.
“What the hell is going on here?” Andrej shouted behind him.
The door to the Redwood closed, and the blond bassist threw his hands up in frustration.
“What do you mean?”
“What do I mean?” Andrej repeated, agitated. “Are you kidding me? Leaf is completely out of it! He’s not getting anything right. Shouldn’t he be jumping for joy? Tristan’s back, after all.”
“Hm …” José only murmured, taking another drag of his cigarette and blew out the smoke.
Andrej rolled his eyes and walked a few paces away.
Unlike the rest of the band, he led an almost exemplary lifestyle when it came to health.
Drugs were taboo for him. He went to the gym at least three times a week and spent every free minute on a surfboard.
But as a Latino, José drew the line at abstaining from gluten out of conviction rather than for health reasons.
Andrej took his commitment to a healthy lifestyle, which was often celebrated in Los Angeles, a bit too seriously.
“He’ll handle it,” José replied. “He’s always had issues with drugs …”
“You’re not defending him, are you?” Andrej raised his eyebrows incredulously and pointed to the door. “He was a wreck when I picked him up. Does he even realize what’s ahead of us?”
“I’m sure he’ll find his way back on track. Don’t worry.”
“How can you sugarcoat this?”
“I’m not sugarcoating anything,” José replied soothingly. He glared at the cigarette in his hand and growled. “My only cigarette today, and you’re about to ruin it for me.”
“Really?” Andrej sighed in exasperation.
“So far, he hasn’t done anything to cause concern …”
Andrej shook his head in disbelief. “He won’t last like this for long.”
“He’s never been the type to give interviews.” José suddenly paused and narrowed his eyes at Andrej. “Oh … Now I see where you’re coming from. You’re just mad because he forced you to take care of him.”
With a contemptuous snort, Andrej turned away from him. “And your optimism is getting on my nerves.”
José appreciated the brief silence, relishing a drag from his cigarette as he wiped the sweat from his forehead. He looked forward to a shower. Despite having an air-conditioned car, it was well overdue.
“And what about Tris?” Andrej finally asked. “Is he going to make it? Because honestly, the timing was incredibly bad.”
José extinguished the cigarette in the ashtray and blinked his eyes in surprise. “The timing? Andrej! He lost control because he didn’t know what else to do. What’s wrong with you?”
Andrej scowled. “What’s wrong with you? I’m sorry if all I can think about right now is that we’ve lost a lot of precious time.
We should have been in the rehearsal room the last three weeks, preparing for the upcoming tour, and doing a lot of promotion.
We shouldn’t waste any more time. And it’s annoying to watch them let themselves go. ”
“They’re not letting themselves go,” José argued. “They’re trying hard to cope. What happened isn’t easy to brush off. It looks like Leaf is feeling a lot of guilt, thinking it’s his fault. Some understanding would be appropriate.”
Andrej shook his head and crossed his arms. “And what happened in Vegas?” he asked, although he already knew the answer.
“Tris crashed into a house, had all the guardian angels on his side, and somehow convinced the doctors that he just flipped out briefly.”
“And he gets away with that,” Andrej concluded. He threw his hands up again as if a sudden thought came to him. “And what was that with Carol earlier? Are we just sweeping the elephant in the room under the rug? That was a damn suicide attempt, man!”
José nodded. “I don’t think this Dr. Snider was clueless. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have discharged Tristan.”
“Incredible how lucky that man is. And on the way here? What did you talk about?”
“About nothing.”
“What? The drive takes at least five hours. You must have talked about something. Anything.”
“He was quiet. Lost in thought. He was asleep when you called and whined.”
Andrej twitched his mouth and skipped the part about him. “Is that a good sign now? Or has he fooled everyone?”
“I wish I knew.”
“Then let’s hope he doesn’t turn into a ticking time bomb like our other zombie in there.”
“Do you have a spare phone you don’t need?”
Andrej was already at the door, but he turned back around. “Why?”
“His phone doesn’t work anymore. And knowing him, he probably won’t bother getting a new one.”
“That’ll make it even harder to reach or find him than it already is.”
José nodded in agreement.
“I’ll check.”
Together, they returned to the bar.