13 - NAZÁR
13
NAZáR
I t’s been some time since I’ve been this restless. Every time I find myself near her, I want to see her kneeling in front of me. I want to see her bound and breathless with a complete loss of control.
My desire, tension, frustration, stress, and confusion . . . I find that I want to take it all out on her body. Yet, I know that she’s not ready. I don’t want to ruin her with my loss of control. And I fear that because I want her so bad, I just might lose control.
The best thing for me to do is find a suitable partner to have a scene with. Someone other than her so I can release my pent-up frustration and unrestrained desire.
When I left her at the distillery today, that was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I wanted to leave the rest of the customers in the hands of my staff, throw Princesa over my shoulder, take her to my office at the distillery, and fuck her until she forgot her name.
Those are the thoughts of a foolish man—one who loses control.
Why am I that way with her when I’m ordinarily disciplined and restrained?
She’s fresh, innocent, and pure. No one has marked her body; no one has tainted her soul. She’s pliable, a malleable instrument in my hands. I want to teach her how to yield to my needs and control her desires. I want her to learn what it means to sacrifice for the greater good of another and know what it feels like to have someone sacrifice everything for her.
I pull a hand down my face and get up from my bed. It’s late, and the day is almost done, but I know that I won’t get any sleep. My mind is too muddled with confusion over this woman.
I’m in a vulnerable place right now. It’s been almost five years since my life turned upside down. Almost five years since I realized that maybe there was no woman out there for me. No one that I could ever destroy again.
It’s been awhile since I’ve had sex or acted out a scene. I need some sort of release. Walking down the pathway from my house into the resort, I veer to the left, heading for the beach.
It’s empty at night on this stretch of beach. It’s the closest to my private property, and seldom does anyone wander this way, especially with the “No Trespassing” sign.
A gentle breeze blows, and there’s nothing but the instrumental sound of the ocean’s waves to accompany this starry night. Stepping out of my slides, I remove my shirt and shorts and wade into the water.
Lately, Bella has been on my mind more than she has in a long time. She intrudes upon my thoughts at the most inconvenient times, and I find it throws me unexpectedly into depression.
The warm water is refreshing against my hot skin. The muscle soreness from my earlier workout dissipates with every stroke I take in the water. Images of Bella on that final day rush through my mind.
Her tear-streaked face was red and puffy, and anger pinched her features. I still loved her even as she stood in my face, lying to me. I only wanted things to be better for her. I prayed that she could live up to her promises, not just for my sake but for both of ours and any future family we might have.
Not in a million years had I expected the doorbell to ring that late at night with a visitor. We didn’t have unannounced visitors. Only dinner guests and the foreman from the construction crew working on building our resort came to our home.
Yet, none of them would show up at my front door at ten at night. It wasn’t unusual for Bella to be gone for hours at a time, especially when she was upset. Sometimes, I knew where she was going; other times, I didn’t.
I knew something was wrong when I heard the doorbell ring. Dread made my footsteps heavy as each step took me closer to the door . . . closer to the turning point in my life.
I hadn’t heard the words spoken to me. I hadn’t even read their lips. I’d known in my soul that my wife was no longer in this world.
Although my mind is active and alert with memories from that day, my body is extremely exhausted. I hope to return home and fall asleep after a glass or two of bourbon.
Surprisingly, a shadowy figure walks on the beach in my direction, roughly seventy-five yards down the shore.
No one should be down here this time of night. Surely, they’ve seen the “No Trespassing” sign by now.
The closer I swim to the shore, the closer the figure draws to me. Rather than turning back, the person continues walking in my direction, but their head is down, and they’re not looking at me.
“Hey! Did you see the ‘No Trespassing’ sign down there?” I call out.
“I’m sorry. No, I didn’t.”
I would recognize that sultry southern voice anywhere. It’s impossible for me to turn her back, although I know she’s not expecting what she’s about to see.
“It’s okay, Princesa. I didn’t realize it was you,” I say, stepping from the water.
The moon shines brightly on her face as her steps falter and her eyes rest on my cock. When I approach her, gathering my clothes as I go along, she stares at me with her wide-eyed gaze.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude on a private moment.”
“And private property,” I say, pointing toward the “No Trespassing” sign.
She turns to look in the direction I point and then back at me. She’s so damned cute biting that bottom lip the way she is. I wish I were immune to this woman the way I am with most women, but I’m not. And only God knows why.
That reason alone has me wanting to know more. I find that I’m intrigued by her, and that’s the exact thing that will get me into trouble that I just don’t need.
She turns to go, mumbling that she’s sorry.
Rather than push her away, I want to keep her with me. I don’t want her to leave, and I tell her as much.
“You don’t have to leave.”
She stops and turns around, staring at me and uncertain if she should stay.
“I really didn’t mean to invade your privacy,” she says again, her eyes purposely avoiding looking at my cock.
“Does it bother you that I don’t have clothes on?” I ask.
Shrugging, she replies, “Your beach. Your property. After all, it is a nude beach, so . . .”
Chuckling, I ask, “That bothers you?”
“It did when I first arrived, but not anymore. You should really warn guests before they come.”
I step into my shorts, zipping and buttoning them up with my eyes trained on her. There’s a visible exhalation of relief as her shoulders sag and her face, previously tight, relaxes. I toss my shirt over my shoulder and slide into my shoes.
“Why were you out here this time of night?”
“I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to take a walk. I’ve found that there’s usually no one out here at this time of night.”
“You’ve been down this stretch of beach before?” I ask as we walk back down the beach toward the public area.
“No. I was caught up in my thoughts and just kept walking. I knew a sign was there, but I didn’t pay it any attention.”
I nod, making a mental note to light the path around the sign in case any other new visitors inadvertently miss it.
“What had your mind so preoccupied that you didn’t see the sign . . . or me until the last minute?”
She gazes up at me and then turns her head toward the ocean.
Smirking, I ask, “Me?”
She turns her head back toward me with a slight lift in her eyebrows, a mocking smile, and a gleam in her eyes. “You’re a bit arrogant, aren’t you?”
Shrugging, I reply, “Not really. Just how you looked at me and couldn’t meet my gaze told me everything I needed to know.”
“Are you a mind reader or a people reader?”
“No. Just observant.”
“I was thinking about what changes I need to make to my property to get a resort started and possibly a distillery and if it might be worth it.”
“What type of resort would you have? Are you near water?”
“We are near water, but not like this. There are a lot of rivers and lakes around us, so there wouldn’t be any scuba diving or snorkeling. However, I could offer horseback riding, vineyard tours, wine tasting, kayaking, canoeing, and other activities on the grounds.”
“That’s a good start. Have you started running the numbers to see what the expenses might look like?”
“I have a rough estimate, but I haven’t dug too far into it because I haven’t decided which route to go. That’s the purpose of this visit. Research. I have a question.”
“What’s that?”
She clears her throat. “Why are you out on the beach at this time of night swimming?”
“Like you, I couldn’t sleep. Swimming at night is a good way to become exhausted. You should try it.”
“I’d be scared to try it by myself. Anything could go wrong.”
“So, if you had a partner, you’d try?”
She looks up at me, and I know she hears the challenge in my voice. A smile slowly tilts her full, pouty lips, and she nods, “Yeah. I just might.”
Tossing my shirt on the sand, I slide out of my shoes and unbutton my shorts.
“I’ll race you,” I say.
She shrieks at the challenge and begins ripping off her romper. I run ahead just as she unbuttons her bra and removes her panties.
“No fair! You’re cheating!” she screams out behind me.
I rush into the water, swimming a short distance before waiting for her to join me.
When she runs in, I swim out further.
“You’re going out too far!”
I laugh, shaking my head at her.
“Where are you going? Don’t leave,” I call out encouragingly.
She hesitates briefly, looking back to the shore and then back at me before she decides to remain in the water and swims closer to me. We swim several yards before returning and then do it three more times. I’m thoroughly exhausted now, and I think she is too.
We grab our clothes and dress, silently sitting in the sand and staring at the sky for a few minutes.
“I’ve never done that before.”
“What, swim at night?”
“No. I swam at night in a pool. I’ve just never swam on a starry night like this before. I have always wanted to, though. There are so many beautiful stars in the sky,” she says.
I stare at her face as she keeps her gaze turned upward. Wide, luminescent eyes glow with wonder, and the moon lights her cinnamon face. Full lips carve up into a beautiful smile.
“What are you thinking about?”
“This place is romantic. I’d heard that it was, but since my arrival, I’ve been shocked by the unexpected.”
“Then I did my job.”
“You’re into shock and awe?”
I want to say, No, I’m into you , but I don’t.
“I’m into providing an experience for my guests like no other. An experience they can’t get at another resort.”
“Well, I’ve traveled many places and . . .” She bites her lip and turns away.
“And what?”
“Um . . . I haven’t been to any place that compares to this. Belle Baie does provide a unique experience,” she says as a cool, crisp breeze whips off the water and lifts her hair from her shoulders.
Her eyes sparkle with happiness, and I would like to see that look on her face more often.
“And the romance?”
“It’s not just in the oceanside dinners, the candlelit paths along the beach and around the hotel, or the music always playing. Not even the allure of having your fetishes catered to or the relaxing and erotic spa offerings. It’s in the beauty of this place. The beaches, the water, colorful flowers, and the coconut, palm, and flamboyant trees give it an exotic appeal. It’s what dreams are made of.”
“That’s the same thing I thought when I first visited here.”
“How long ago was that?”
“Ten years.”
“You stayed and never left?”
“Not quite. I did return home to Colombia for a while, but then . . . I knew I wanted to return.”
“I could see wanting to come here and escape. Hide away from the world and all of my problems and cares.”
“Do you have a lot of those?”
“What?”
“Cares. Problems.”
She turns, gives me an assessing look, then smiles and says, “About the same as everyone else.”
“How do you manage stress, Princesa?” I can’t help the way that my voice darkens. My thoughts go elsewhere, and I can’t control my wants and urges. At the same time, I don’t want to run her away.
“I travel, or I write.”
“What do you write?”
She looks away again, and I feel that whatever she says won’t be true.
“Umm . . . about my travels. I write about them in my journal.”
“Is that all?”
“Yes. What about you? How do you manage your stress?”
“I’m not sure you really want to know, Princesa.”
She turns to look at me again and stares at my lips before her eyes drop to my hands and then down my legs. “What if I said that I do want to know?”
“I’d be worried about what I’d do to you if you learned the truth.”
A soft gasp escapes her, and then she giggles. “You’re funny. I didn’t expect that.”
“I wasn’t trying to be.”
A stark look returns to her face. “Are you threatening me?”
“Never that. If I tell you what I do to relieve my stress, I might just have to teach you a lesson or two.”
“I’ve always been an A student. Willing and ready to learn.”
Leaning forward, I rub my thumb over her bottom lip and say, “Don’t play with magic you don’t understand, Princesa.”
She sucks my thumb into her mouth and bites down on it.
“You’ve been warned,” I growl.