1. March
MARCH
PRESENT DAY
I gently brush back the hair from my daughter’s forehead, growing misty-eyed as I give her the once-over. She looks beautiful with her hair worn loose, a long white veil trailing down behind her, wearing the most stunning strapless wedding dress I’ve ever seen.
She rubs my arm, her big brown eyes searching my face. “You okay, Mum?”
“Yeah.” I give her a smile, though my heart feels like it’s being squeezed too hard in my chest. Twenty-eight years went by so bloody fast. “I was just remembering the day I found out I was pregnant with you. I was on holiday in Aussie, and fuck I was scared, but I just knew I wanted you. It feels like yesterday, and now you’re getting married.”
“I know Mum. I’m still your baby.”
“You are,” I agree, giving her a tight hug. “You’ll always be my little girl.”
“You may kiss the bride.”
I give up on trying to hold back my tears as my baby girl throws her arms around her new husband’s neck, standing on her tippy toes to reach him. Van picks her up by the waist, lifting her with ease, and the small crowd all whoop and cheer when they kiss.
And kiss. And kiss.
“Get a room!” the groom’s younger brother shouts, and laughter ripples through the crowd. I wipe at my wet cheeks. I hope my mascara hasn’t run; Ellie paid for all of us to have our makeup professionally done for the big day, and I could barely recognise myself in the mirror after the lady was done with me. My curly hair — freshly dyed dark brown to hide the strands of grey threading throughout — has been tamed into an up-do, I’ve got fake lashes on, and I’m in heels, which I’ve pretty much avoided ever since I found out I was pregnant with Ellie twenty-eight years ago. I feel like a million bucks. A very happy, overjoyed-but-filled-with-bittersweet-feelings, million bucks that is.
Ellie deserves her happily ever after. She had to wait a bloody long time for it, and when Evander walked back into her life, I was seriously worried things would go the other way and she’d end up heartbroken again. Instead they’re mated , and while I’m still wrapping my head around the fact that my daughter willingly let her man bite her so hard it scarred her shoulder, and that she in turn bit him the same way, I’m glad that they have this bond between them. There’s no going back for them, and he is devoted to her, I can see that now.
She has the joy and security I wish I could have had myself.
Ellie grins at me as she waits her turn to sign her marriage certificate, looking absolutely stunning in her white dress, and I give her a little wave, fresh tears blurring my vision.
“She’s done good,” Dad says beside me, leaning heavily on his walking stick. He should have his walker, but he insisted on using a cane instead, arguing that the outdoor venue — the new garden Ellie helped create at the vineyard she now owns thanks to this wedding to her millionaire husband — meant that a cane was easier to use on the grass. His white hair ruffles in the breeze coming off the ocean as he turns his dark brown eyes to me. “He’s a good man,” Dad adds.
“He is,” I reply.
“Now we just have to find you a good man.”
“ Dad! Don’t start with that nonsense.”
“Amaia—”
“— Hemi ,” I say, using the same stern tone I hear the retirement home nurses use with him when he’s being stubborn. He gives me the stink eye but shuts his mouth. “This is Ellie’s day. Not the day where we discuss how many years it’s been since I brought a man around.”
“And it’s a wedding, girl. It’s a great place to meet people. That’s where I met your mother, you know, at my cousin’s wedding at the Hikurangi Rugby Club.”
“Yeah, I know.” I’ve heard the story a hundred times before, but I’m feeling it more today, because Mum isn’t here with us to celebrate. She never even got to meet Ellie, and that’s part of the sadness I’m feeling. She would have loved today; with the late-summer sun shining and the beautiful views of grapevines and the bright blue ocean behind them… and she would have loved our beautiful Ellie.
I can see it in Dad’s eyes that he’s thinking the same thing. “I love you, Dad,” I tell him quietly, rubbing his back. His body may be old and frail, but there’s still a quiet strength to him that I don’t think will ever go away.
“I love you too, bubs.”
Two of Ellie’s friends — both women in their 70s — make a beeline for us now that the ceremony is over. “Did I hear you mention the Hikurangi Rugby Club?” the first one asks Dad. “I grew up just around the corner!” She’s Māori too, and I put two and two together — this is the gardening club friend of Ellie’s from the same iwi as us all.
I leave Dad in their hands after a quick round of introductions, stepping away so that I can go talk to my daughter. There’s already a group gathering around the newlyweds, and I hang back, waiting my turn.
That’s when I notice him.
I can tell straight away that he’s a wolf — the yellow eyes are a dead giveaway — but it’s where those eyes are currently trained that catches my attention. The big, handsome, muscle-bound man is staring at my ass. His gaze travels up my body, pausing at my tits for a few seconds, and it’s clear that he appreciates what he’s looking at. I have such mixed feelings about it all. I like feeling desired, but at the same time I want to crawl under a rock. I haven’t had a man look at me with such intensity in a while.
I have to admit, the moment he realises he’s been caught is pretty entertaining. His mouth drops open, and his eyes grow wide, his embarrassment obvious.
“ Really? ” I ask quietly, raising my eyebrows. I don’t know what’s come over me to try and flirt with him, but I know he can hear me — these wolves all have far more sensitive hearing than I do.
A grin splits his face, sharp canines on full display. He looks like he’d be full of mischief.
Lordy. I’m in trouble.
Dinner has been served, the cake has been cut, and the first dance is done. Ellie tossed her bouquet, and it was a huge relief when the thing didn’t go flying in my direction. The cake is delicious, and I’m having my second serving with a good dollop of cream while I chat to an old friend — Van’s mother, Bronte.
She grins, flashing sharp werewolf teeth as she leans in close to my ear. “That shifter has been staring at you all night,” she whispers. At my alarmed look, she adds, “Don’t worry, he can’t hear us over the music.”
“Do you know him?”
She laughs, gold eyes crinkling with amusement. I’ve always thought Bronte was stunning, and even though she looks a little different now, post-Unravelling, she’s just as beautiful. With thick dark curls and a wide mouth, she reminds me of a movie star. “Just because I’m a wolf, it doesn’t mean I know them all. We’re not even the same species.”
“I know, I didn’t mean it like that . I just wondered, because I don’t think he’s someone Ellie knows, at least she never told me anything, and he seems a little older than her, so I thought maybe he’s a family friend? Someone from your husband’s… pack? ” I add, hoping I’m using the right term. I’m still learning all the ins and outs of the two wolf cultures my daughter has married into. Van is both a shifter and a werewolf, and the alpha of his own pack. Bronte is a werewolf. Weston, Van’s father, is a shifter, and he is also an alpha with his own pack. It’s a lot.
“Oh no. He’s one of the workers here, on the construction crew Van hired. So he’s worked with Ellie on the garden. I’m not sure what pack he’s from, but if he’s here at our kids’ wedding it’s a good sign that Evander trusts him,” she explains, using her son’s full name, the way she always does when she’s serious, “and there’s no way an alpha like Van would tolerate someone dangerous in his territory.”
Alphas, territories… I think Bronte sees how my mind is still catching up to this new world, because she gives me a sympathetic look. “It took longer than you’d think for me to understand all the intricacies of shifter politics, so don’t let the unknown deter you. That man is handsome, and he’s been looking at you like he wants you for his next meal.”
“That sounds ominous.”
“Honey, no . Let me tell you a secret.” She leans even closer, her lips brushing my ear, and I can smell the wine on her breath. “Wolf men love eating one thing and one thing only: pussy . And they’re fucking good at it.”
“May I have this dance?”
I register the deep voice and an Aussie accent, and glance up to find a familiar pair of yellow eyes staring at me, pupils large and shining in the dark room. His hand is outstretched, but I make a show of looking around, pretending that I’m certain he’s not asking me…
“I’m asking you, ” he laughs good-naturedly. “Can’t have ya sitting here all by yourself tonight. Come on, let’s dance, and I’ll introduce myself.”
“Isn’t that a little backwards?” I ask, but I take his hand anyway. It’s blazing warm and huge, and as he pulls me to my feet I can appreciate that he is also huge, towering over me the way all the wolf men seem to do. Up close I can see that his shirt barely fits him, the fabric straining at the shoulders, his large biceps looking somewhat strangled by his rolled-up sleeves.
“Nah. I don’t think so anyway. I’m Brett.”
“Brett. I’m Amaia.”
“Amaia. It’s lovely to meet you.” He pronounces my name right the first time, and that’s always a good sign. The DJ changes the song as we join the bodies already on the dance floor, and there’s a collective whoop from the crowd as the first few recognisable bars play. More people jump up from their seats as the first words play over the speakers.
“What is it with you Kiwis and this song?” Brett asks, shaking his head. “Every party I’ve ever been to, it’s like a siren call, bringing everyone over forty to the dance floor.”
“Just wait for the chorus!” I yell back. Half the crowd is already singing along.
“Believe me, I know! ” he replies, bending lower so I have at least some hope of hearing him. “ I’ve been here ten years; I’ve witnessed it! Sorry If I’m being offensive about the song of your people!”
I laugh, shaking my head. My hand is still in his, his other hand on my waist, and I’m surprised by how natural this feels. When the chorus of The Exponents’ most famous song does start, the volume is so loud from all the yelling guests that Brett winces, so I tug on his hand. “Let’s go outside instead!”
He nods, letting me lead him away from the dance floor. Ellie and Van have been caught up chatting to other guests, and I’ve done the rounds with everyone I know. I helped Dad get in a taxi hours ago with the private care nurse Van hired us for the week, and really I’ve got no reason to stay much longer. I should be getting in one of the taxis lined up and waiting right now — but as I step outside into the refreshing air, Brett’s hand lands on the small of my back, and I know nothing about this man but I’m already melting under that small touch. He smells good , and I’ve always been a sucker for big men with muscles. Standing this close, I can see that his nose has been broken at least once; there’s a slightly crooked bluntness to the ridge of it. I bet he was a rugby player; he’s built like one. I feel tiny next to him.
“Ah, that’s better,” he says. “There’s just some pitches that really irritate me.”
Even from here, the yelling — you can’t really call it singing — is overly loud. “I’m surprised the other wolves haven’t all come out, too.”
“I saw Van’s mother passing out earplugs. That’s why.”
“Oh. Smart . She’s always ahead of the game.” We’re walking slowly across the wooden deck, and I stare up at the moon. It looks close to full, and I remember that Ellie said the full moon is only four days away. She had to be very careful about that when picking her wedding date.
“Have you known her long then?”
“Hm? Bronte? Yeah. I’ve known her for…” I pause, double checking the maths in my head. “Twenty-four years. The kids used to play together up in Northland where Ellie and I lived. They played together every day, every summer.”
“You’re joking. I knew those two had known each other before — Ellie mentioned it while we were working on the gardens — but I didn’t realise they went that far back. And they’re fated mates.” He shakes his head. “How crazy is that?”
“I still can’t believe it, but then again I’m still wrapping my head around all the changes in the last few years.” It’s been just over two and a half years since the Unravelling occurred, changing all of our lives overnight. I’ll never forget that day, turning on the telly to watch the morning news while I made breakfast, only to find that non-humans existed, that there was this entire other realm, and that nothing was ever going to be the same again. I was terrified.
Then Ellie had called, her voice shaky and filled with panic, explaining that the shape of her ears had changed. “Mum, how could you not know?!” she’d asked, distraught, when we realised she must have inherited it from her father.
That man had been a one night stand who left before I’d even woken, the bloody blond bastard. The sex had been good but that didn’t cancel out the fact that he’d been a bit of a dick — but of course, twenty-two year old me had been attracted to walking red flags. I only knew him as ’TJ’, and back then in the days before the internet, that wasn’t enough information to try and track him down. I do wonder if he knew he was fae, or if he was in the dark about his heritage as much as my girl was about her own.
“Yeah. That’s true,” Brett says now, pulling me out of my thoughts. I look up at him, in awe of the way his large pupils reflect the moonlight, just like a cat. Or like a wolf, I guess.
“Do you hear even better in your wolf form?” I ask as he winces again as the final round of the chorus starts up.
“Yeah, I do. Better hearing, better sense of smell, everything is heightened further. I’m faster too. It’s one of the reasons why I’m so happy about the Unravelling. I spent most of my life with my wolf trapped inside me twenty-four-seven, and now I get to let him out every day.”
His smile is wide and warm, and it may be dark out here, but when he looks at me like that I feel like I’m standing in the glow of the sun. “You should see my wolf. I’ve got a dark brown coat in that form, but my muzzle…” he shakes his head, gesturing to his chin. “It’s going grey.”
“That’s cute,” I laugh. I haven’t been that close to shifted wolves that often. The first time had been when I met Evander’s wolf. I’d been afraid, but Ellie had wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him as if he were a cuddly puppy and not the huge horse-sized creature with the scariest set of teeth that I’ve ever seen. I push the thought away. “Do I get to meet him, then?” I think that’s the right term. I always hear Ellie refer to Van’s other forms as if they’re different… people. Wolves. People wolves?
“Sure, if you want. Maybe not here, though. It might cause a bit of a scene… there’s a couple of wolves here that have been drinking a lot … throw in shifting and that’s never a good mix.”
“Ah. Got it.”
“Plus I have to get naked first, just putting that out there,” he adds, and there’s that mischievous gleam in his eyes again. “You can’t shift in clothes — they just rip apart — so…”
“Well, I wouldn’t complain.” I force myself to be braver than I feel. I’m not drunk, I’m not even tipsy, but the wine has given me the confidence I usually lack.
This is what we’re here for, right? This man has been devouring me with his eyes all day, and I’m not ashamed to admit I want him to follow through. Bronte’s words about me being the meal echo in my mind.
I should have asked her about knotting. Fuck.
I haven’t done anything like this in a long time, and the last time I did, the whole encounter was awkward and rushed and I left as soon as it was over. But this … Brett takes a big step down off the deck, turning to face me, so that we’re now the same height. Stepping into his arms feels so easy, so simple and right , the warmth of his body and the feel of his hands as they smooth down my sides setting me aflame. “Fuck you’re beautiful,” he murmurs, lips pressing to my neck, his sharp teeth nipping at my skin as his fingers dig into the flesh of my ass. “I haven’t been able to take my eyes off you all day.”
“Hmm. You make for good eye candy yourself.”
He laughs against my skin, before kissing me there, just under my jaw, the swipe of his tongue surprising me with how hot that makes me feel. There’s a hard bar pressed against my thigh, and I reach between us, gripping his cock and squeezing it tight.
Oh fuck he’s huge. Long and thick.
He growls , threading his fingers through my hair as my hand slides over the shape of his dick, feeling the ridge of the head and scraping my nails over the fabric. He’s sucking on my neck now, and I moan with need. This man is going to leave a hickey on me like we’re teenagers and I —
He kisses me forcefully, passionately, and I kiss him back just as hard, groaning against his tongue. His hands are all over my body, squeezing and kneading and exploring, setting every part of me on fire along the way. I cling to him for dear life and he grinds against my hand through the fabric of his pants, and that’s when I slide my hand along and feel the very obvious bulbous addition at the base of his shaft.
Oh. That’s the knot.
I squeeze on instinct and he breaks our kiss to groan into my neck, his hands gripping my hips tight as he bites down on my shoulder, just hard enough for me to feel a little sting. Oh fuck, now that I’m here, I think I would actually let him bite me. This wolf can eat me any day.
“Come back to my —”
The sound of heavy footsteps on the wooden deck has us springing apart. “Brett, we’ve got an emergency, and we could use your help, mate,” says a booming voice, and I turn to see the shadow of a huge man. He’s an orc, one that I don’t know, with a bald head and tusks decorated with metal tips. “Shit, sorry,” the stranger continues. “ Fuck, I didn’t realise I was interrupting something.”
“It’s okay. An emergency?”
“Yeah, Little Pup is puking his guts out in the men’s bathroom. I’m not a wolf…”
“Ah, shit, ” Brett swears. “Yeah, give me a sec, I’ll go help him.” Brett looks at me apologetically. “It’s my nephew — he lives with me. He’s the new apprentice on the vines here. He’s eighteen, and I told him to manage himself responsibly — you have to drink a fucking shit ton to actually get that pissed when you’re a wolf — but…”
“ Teenagers. Go. Do you want my help?”
“Nah, it’s your daughter’s wedding, I’m not gonna ask ya to clean up that shit with me. Look, I’ll come find you, okay?”
I nod, but as I watch him disappear inside I’m already doubting myself. It’s been so long, and he’s hot and wonderful, but it’s my daughter’s wedding , as he reminded me, and it shouldn’t be the place where I pick up some random guy. I’m the mother of the bride, for fuck’s sake. I should act like one.
Still, I wait outside for a few minutes, catching my breath, not wanting to follow him directly inside. I didn’t feel self conscious dragging Brett out here, but now I’m suddenly shy of people noticing me coming back in straight after him. When I do go inside, I swear the other wolves are looking at me differently as I pass by them. They can probably smell the scent of him on me or something. Thankfully, I spot Ellie — finally alone — on the way to the ladies’ room, and head in after her.
“Oh, Mum ,” she says when I step through the door, her shoulders slumping with relief, her hip leaping against the marble counter. “I’m glad it’s you. I’m knackered. I came in here to escape everyone.”
“Hopefully you’re not trying to escape your new husband,” I deadpan.
She rolls her eyes. “Not him. He’ll find me anyway.” A small smile graces her lips, the one I’ve always called her cheeky grin , and her eyes unfocus in a way I’ve seen a thousand times whenever she’s in her own head. “He always does.”
Ah, okay. I don’t want to know what she’s thinking about right now — it’s some sort of sex thing, I can tell. I have no problem with my daughter having a great sex life, and on a purely factual level I’d be shocked if she didn’t with the six-foot-eight pretty-boy wolf she just married, but I don’t need the details.
“Have you had a good day then?” I ask, aiming to distract us both.
She smiles wide, eyes filled with joy. “The best.” She’s barefoot now, and with my heels I’m just that bit taller than her. I open my arms, and she falls into them. “I love you, Mum.”
“I love you too, baby girl. Hey, I might head off, and check on Koro before I go to bed.”
Ellie nods. “Yeah, definitely. Don’t hang around just because of me. As soon as Van tracks me down I’m going to ask him if we can slip away too… I’m partied out.”
I tuck her blonde hair behind her ears. “I’m so proud of you, Ellie-girl.”
She kisses my cheek, hugging me tight once more. “Thanks, Mama.”
Brett isn’t anywhere to be seen when I step back out of the bathroom. Part of me feels bad just leaving, but I really ought to check in on Dad — it was a big day for him and he’s no spring chicken at eighty-seven — but my guilt at slipping away without a goodbye is short-lived when I step into the foyer on my way out and find Brett sitting there on the tiled floor with his teenage nephew. I eye the bucket next to the slumped figure, and give Brett a grimacing look.
“It ain’t pretty,” he agrees, his expression mirroring my own. “ Someone thought it was smart to swipe a bottle of whiskey from behind the bar — at his own fucking workplace — and down over half of it in one go. I have to pay your son-in-law back.”
“No.” I shake my head vehemently. “No, Van won’t have it, I already know that. Besides, this is punishment enough,” I add as the boy hastily grabs the bucket again, dry-heaving over the rim.
“Punishment for me, ” Brett laments, rubbing his forehead. “I probably deserve it though. I should have kept a better eye on him. Though to be fair, I was distracted.”
I blush under his appreciative gaze. His nephew pukes again — more violently this time — and I give a small shrug. Clearly this wasn’t meant to be. “I have to head back to my accommodation and check on my dad. He’s eighty-seven.”
“Yeah, I saw him earlier. He did well.”
“He did. I’ll… maybe see you around.”
Brett nods, mouth open as if he’s debating what to say, but I’m already stepping away with a small wave. He’s hot and charming, big and strong and handsome in a far more blunt, beaten up way compared to the wolves in my son-in-law’s family, but I’m only down here for another night anyway, and then it’s a car ferry and a three and a half hour drive back up to Northland. It was never going to be more than a one-night-stand, and all the vomit has well and truly killed the mood for that.
I look back just once. The puppy-dog eyes of a wolf are still watching me, and my heart aches a little more.