Chapter Twenty #2
At six thirty sharp, Tess’s little crimson car pulled into her driveway, and before Tess could exit, Bree locked her front door and climbed into the passenger seat. The interior of the car carried the appealing citrus vanilla scent of Tess.
“You look gorgeous.” Bree surveyed Tess in the ivory-hued dress she’d selected.
It was formfitting and showed off her assets both in what it covered and what it didn’t cover.
As Tess sat in the driver’s seat, her hem rode a few inches above her knee, and Tess’s shapely legs were on display.
There was a hint of pale, smooth cleavage revealed as well. Bree’s libido approved.
“You too…alluring.” Tess put the car in reverse, tossing a quick look in Bree’s direction and raising her eyebrows. “We both clean up okay.”
“And both of us with our hair down too. Do you have your dancing shoes on?”
“I’d tell you it’s the pair with two left feet,” Tess said, “but my mother did enroll me in ballroom dancing as part of my preparation for her version of acceptable. I’m sure she had visions of me waltzing at some gala event with some man in a tuxedo.
So, if we waltz and you lead, I might be able to spare your toes. ”
Bree nodded. “I’m expecting the gamut—you wildly gyrating with your hair down, you slow dancing in my arms. This place we’re going to, will they be okay with that?”
“The place is known for not tolerating anyone harassing anyone,” Tess replied. “I’m out, so no surprises there, but I’ve never been out wildly gyrating with my hair down, and as a judge from the area, it’s unlikely that will happen tonight.”
“Fair enough, since I’m in the same professional boat.” Bree looked across the console at Tess’s profile. She looked so enticing tonight. “But a slow dance. I’ve been counting on you in my arms. And there’s that kiss you owe me, from the chocolate cake consumption statute.”
“Quite an agenda for a raffle prize meeting,” Tess dryly stated as she kept her eyes on the road.
“Let’s just start with dinner and go from there,” Bree suggested. “Deal?”
Tess glanced over at her and offered a lopsided smile. “Yeah, you know it’s been a great day. I’m just not good at this.”
“Not good at what?”
“At not bringing in all sorts of things outside of the moment.”
“You did okay in Tahoe with no outside stuff,” Bree reminded her.
“Actually, I was rather bad at that, at leaving it all in Tahoe. Plus, I think the intent, at least for Las Vegas, is about unsavory transgressions—not my definition of what happened in Tahoe.”
Bree nodded. “The opposite.”
“But it was my intent to leave everything in Tahoe, contrary to my upbringing. It was instilled in me to never live in the moment. I would never be the best at everything if I didn’t learn from the past and set my sights on the future, scope out the terrain ahead.
I needed a future that would cast the best light on…
” Tess paused for a moment. “My parents.”
Bree could only nod. Tess had already revealed a bit more of her history today. Bree considered how different it had been from hers and Hank’s childhoods.
Tess continued to focus on the road as she spoke.
“I was a disappointment from the beginning. My father had plans for himself and his progeny. For his male heir. My mother couldn’t have more children due to complications with my birth—not a positive beginning on my part.
I was the one who was left to validate my parents’ worth in the eyes of the society they traveled in.
My mother grew up neglected and unsupported, then left that behind when she married my father, an extremely prosperous lawyer.
She inserted herself into high society as if she’d been born there, but I know she secretly lived with unresolved personal issues.
And my father…he was Maximillian Caldwell Fairchild the Third without an adequate Maximillian Caldwell Fairchild the Fourth.
I wasn’t the son my father craved either. ”
Bree glanced at Tess’s profile. Her slender neck was so pale and smooth as it constricted for a moment with a hard swallow, and her long lashes fluttered.
Bree could see the moisture almost brimming over in her eyes, and she wanted to place a hand on Tess’s leg, to touch her with a demonstration of support, but Bree wasn’t sure that Tess would want an overt act of sympathy as she revealed the pain that had defined her life.
Bree looked at this alluring, complex woman and realized how much she wanted to make Tess’s life better.
“I was insufficient for the role they needed me to play. I was a girl, and a lesbian, no less, as it turned out, although they were in denial of that. My performance never reached the bar they’d set, and their approval and love were dependent on that. I’m not even sure they knew what they wanted.”
“You’re a state court judge, Tess. If that wouldn’t have been enough, it sounds like an unattainable bar.”
“The only thing worse than not being enough is when someone assumes I’m even less than I am. Underestimating me. Not at least giving me credit for who I am.”
“I’m sorry.” Bree decided to stick to that simple declaration.
She wasn’t sure what else to offer. She was straddling a line between wanting to tell Tess to pull over so she could just hold her in a reassuring hug and doing something that might push Tess into withdrawal.
Tess was taking the rare step of being open with her about her deepest wounds.
It all made sense to Bree, Tess’s reserve with most people, how she’d let her profession and robe shape her.
“Not your fault. Now, that’s more than enough about me and my upbringing. Too much.” Tess shook her head. “You must be special because I rarely share this. I was well taken care of. Nannies, tutors, boarding schools…I was so much better off than so many kids in the world.”
Bree was grateful Tess had shared what she had, but it hit her in the gut that she might be facing a time when Tess didn’t offer her that level of openness.
The more she put off being candid with Tess about the confidential commission role she’d gotten herself caught up in, the worse things would probably turn out, and she was having trouble seeing her future without Tess in it.
Without at least trying, and she was afraid that window would close.
Bree looked into Tess’s hazel eyes and hated the ghost of sadness that flickered there.
She wanted to chase it away, to fill Tess up with all the things that would replace those hints of pain.
And while leaks might threaten Tess’s safety, Ned’s excuse that telling Tess about the courthouse issues could slow down the resolution and jeopardize her safety were no longer convincing. Tess could keep a confidence.
“My past. It’s history,” Tess stated in a manner that indicated the discussion was history too. “Now we’re heading to the Seaside Eatery for dinner. And dancing—we’re going to get at least a few of those in too. I want that.” She offered Bree a touch of a smile. “I really want that.”