Chapter Nine
LIAM TILTED HIS HEAD , trying to make sense of what Tilly meant.
“I’m sorry,” she said again as she gestured at the room. “For this.”
“The hotel?”
“No. Well, yes. For us having to be here at all. For you needing to ask Mr. Gilbert for this. For what happened at Darby’s. For making you feel as if you had to marry me. For everything.” She shook her head as tears welled in her eyes. “This wasn’t how it was supposed to be.”
Guilt coursed through Liam. “You needn’t apologize.”
“Yes, of course I do. I came here, and I turned your life on its head!”
That she’d done, but it was clear she hadn’t meant to. Liam ran a hand through his hair and crossed the room, trying to figure out what to say. “Sometimes life doesn’t go as planned. I don’t know if Deirdre said anything to you about this, but I got myself into a heap of trouble over the summer. I put her life in danger and nearly lost every penny Jeremiah had saved to buy into the livery. I didn’t mean for any of it to happen, but it did. I made poor decisions, and other people paid for them.” He turned and faced her. “Anything you’ve done pales in comparison. All you wanted was marriage and a life here in Crest Stone. Please don’t feel guilty for that.”
Tilly drew in a shuddering breath. “You aren’t angry with me?”
Liam’s heart melted. He wanted to take her hand or smooth back her hair, but he remained where he was, unsure where those feelings were coming from. Probably from the same place where he’d gone when he had kissed her earlier. One moment he was fulfilling a duty, albeit with a very pretty girl, and the next he was feeling as if he’d do anything to pull her into his arms and carry her off to somewhere no one would ever find them.
He shoved his hands into his pockets awkwardly. “No, of course I’m not angry with you. You did nothing wrong.”
“I should never have gone into your room.” Her cheeks went pink, and she looked away from him. “I just wanted to speak with you, and I thought you’d return soon, and then you didn’t, and I was so tired . . .”
He nodded. She was right about her mistake, but he was hardly about to say so. She blamed herself enough that she didn’t need him agreeing with her. And it was clear she’d meant nothing wrong by it. She’d had a momentary lapse in judgment, and that was all.
“You must wish you didn’t have to marry me.” Her voice was barely audible as her green eyes swam with unshed tears.
“No,” he said gruffly, not sure what to do with the tender emotion rising inside. “I’m the one who offered, didn’t I?” He ran a hand over his hair again, hoping the movement would settle his nerves. He needed to get outside, somewhere he could think. “I’ll fetch your belongings.” Not trusting himself to say anything else, he crossed the room and slipped out the door.
Liam didn’t slow down until he’d reached the bottom of the hill. His breath came fast, but his head was starting to clear.
And the worries came pouring in as fast as the tiny snowflakes falling around him.
What had he done ?
He’d uprooted his carefully reconstructed life. He’d spent the past several months building everything all over again after borrowing money from the wrong man. He’d been methodical and diligent, weighing every decision before he made it.
And now, in what felt like the span of a breath, he’d taken on the responsibility of a wife, had nowhere of his own to live, and was likely the marshal’s least favorite person.
He exhaled a shaky breath. It had all happened so quickly. He hadn’t even had a moment to invite his sister and brother-in-law to the wedding. Deirdre would give him an earful about that later.
Pausing outside the marshal’s home, he raised his hand to knock and said a quick prayer that only Mrs. Wright would be home. God must’ve finally been smiling down upon him, because his prayer was answered. Mrs. Wright greeted him with a smile and quickly fetched Tilly’s packed carpetbag.
“And here, take this too.” She thrust a plant in a tiny glass jar into his free hand. “It’s holly,” she said as he held it up to examine the sharp green leaves and shiny red berries. “For the Christmas season. I ordered it special from back East. Tell Tilly to plant it outside once the ground thaws in spring. Once you have your own home, of course.”
“Thank you,” Liam said. “I’ll pass that along.”
“And please tell Tilly to come by and visit me any time. She can fill me in on all the happenings back in Kansas. It’ll be like going home again.” Mrs. Wright smiled at him.
“I will.”
He said goodbye and stood uncertainly in front of their home for a moment. He’d thought he might stop by the land office, or perhaps pay a visit to the saloon to speak with Mac Allen as a potential investor. But now he was carrying a tiny holly plant, which made him feel somewhat ridiculous.
There was nothing else to do but go back to the hotel.
And his wife.
Liam squared his shoulders and took a deep breath of the freezing air. He was acting like a scared little boy. He’d made this decision, as rash as it was, and it wouldn’t do to cower from it. Besides, Tilly was probably just as uncertain as he was. It was unkind to leave her alone so quickly after their wedding.
And if they were going to be married, he needed to spend the time getting to know her.
He smiled at that as he moved down the sidewalk, past busy storefronts and offices and half-constructed homes.
Ducking around a line of men that extended out of a building with no identification on its exterior yet, Liam caught sight of someone who looked familiar.
His breath caught in his throat, and he almost dropped the little holly plant into the muddy street. He squinted through the snow, which had slowed down but had turned into larger flakes.
The man had been moving toward the doorway of Fred Polson’s Boardinghouse.
Hurrying quickly around the line and back onto the sidewalk, Liam balanced the plant in the crook of his elbow as he reached for the door to the boardinghouse.
Inside, it was as dark as if it were evening. Liam blinked into the shadows. The place smelled smoky, musty, and like burnt food, all at the same time. Thanks to Gilbert’s kindness, he and Tilly hadn’t found themselves staying here. He looked around quickly, searching for a broad man with blond hair and no hat. One who carried a cane although he seemed to have no discernible use for it.
But the only eyes he met were those belonging to a pair of weedy-looking fellows leaning against the wall nearby. They eyed him curiously.
“Pardon me,” he said. “Did a man come through this door just a moment ago? Fair hair with a cane?”
One of the men looked at the other, who shrugged. “Don’t much matter to us who comes in and out of here,” the second man said.
Liam swallowed his irritation. Of course it wouldn’t, not unless he tossed a coin or two the man’s way.
He shook his head. “It isn’t important. Good day.”
It was his imagination, he decided as he stepped back out into the clean, cold air. So much had changed over the past day that his mind was reeling.
There was no other reason why he could have thought he’d seen Dutch Rodgers strolling into Crest Stone’s worst boardinghouse.