6. Chapter Six
Chapter Six
Colt
I wake with a start, reaching down to the holster clipped inside my waistband. The feeling of cold metal against my palm soothes me while I assess my surroundings. Jack. The clinic. My eyes dart to the couch on the wall. Shay.
A low rumble outside catches my attention, and I peer out the front window to see headlights cutting through the darkness. At first, I think it's a city plow truck coming to clear the roads. But as it draws closer, I realize it's not an official vehicle. It's just an old pickup with a plow attachment. I smile, assuming it must belong to one of the locals. The truck moves slowly down the street, pushing aside mounds of fresh snow.
I glance back at Shay, and it's a good thing she's out like a light because it'd take an act of Congress to keep me from staring this time. She's beautiful even when she's asleep. For a moment, I'm tempted to wake her and tell her about the plow until I remember our conversation from last night. I've never seen a woman so hurt. All I was trying to do was compliment her but leave it to me to open my big mouth and make things worse. I’m probably the last person she wants to see right now.
With the electricity back on, I'm careful not to wake her when I pick up the plates and leftover pie from the table in the waiting area and walk them back to the break room. As I put the pie back in the fridge, I hit the replay button on the conversation still fresh in my mind. After hearing about her mom, it wouldn’t surprise me if Shay wasn’t already dealing with deep-seated abandonment issues. So, it makes sense to me why trying to date someone in the military could create challenges.
And believe me. I get it. The U.S. Army isn’t exactly known for its sensitivity training. I’ve heard enough stories from the wives and widows table to know there’s no shortage of guys like Zane in the military world. But how can Shay think we’re all bad based on a few bad experiences? And how different would last night have gone if she didn’t know I was active duty?
Jack perks up and wags his tail when he sees me return from down the hall. I know he'll need to go out soon.
Unsure how Shay will react if I'm still here when she wakes, I grab an extra blanket from the stack near the reception desk and drape it over her shoulders. She gives a sleepy smile when I tuck it around her. Part of me wants to stay and keep talking until we figure this out, but I know that's not what she wants.
"Merry Christmas, Shay," I whisper. I reach down and brush a loose strand of hair from her face, then turn away and whistle softly for Jack. "Time to go, boy."
It's almost 0730 when I steer the General down the snow-covered street that leads to my parents’ house. I feel like I should be on cloud nine knowing I'm about to spend my first Christmas in three years with family. Seeing the look on Mom's face when she unwraps the album of photos I took during my last deployment has me more excited than anything, but no matter how hard I try, my mind keeps going back to Shay.
A chill shoots down my spine remembering the look on her face when she realized who I was. Or… what I was. It's a look I've seen a hundred times from soldiers who've been down in the trenches and lived to tell the tale. A look that makes me want to reach out and show her that not all of us are like my brother. Or her parents. She deserves a relationship that makes her feel safe. And I know if given the chance, I could be that person for her.
As I pull into the drive, I find myself foolishly wishing for some kind of Christmas magic. If only there was a way to convince Shay that there's still joy to be found around the holidays. Even if it means poking a few holes in her wall of logic. Before I can take my coat off, Mom greets me at the door with another one of her legendary hugs. The mouthwatering smells coming from the kitchen follow her down the hall, and my stomach rumbles in anticipation.
She laughs and kisses my cheek. "You must be starving. Go on and grab a seat at the table while I finish plating up breakfast. I told your dad and brother no one was eating until you were home safe."
"Mom, you know you didn't have to do that. But thank you. Oh… and Merry Christmas."
"Merry Christmas to you, too, Colt. We're just glad you made it home safe."
Shortly after I'm seated across the table from Zane, Mom emerges from the kitchen. She's carrying Dad's favorite—a venison quiche with wild mushrooms and fresh thyme—then, after setting it down in the center of the table, returns to the kitchen for a plate of fresh biscuits, a jar of homemade rhubarb jam, and another plate piled high with pan-fried bacon and sausages.
Dad says grace when she finally joins us, and conversations about yesterday's festival begin.
"It's a shame you missed it," Mom says. "You would've had so much fun."
I nod, reaching for a biscuit. "You think so, huh? How was the caroling?"
Her eyes light up. "Oh, it was wonderful! At least until Mayor Donovan made the announcement."
I spread a thick layer of jam on my biscuit, realizing that a slice of pie was the only food to hit my stomach since yesterday's lunch. "Announcement?"
"The one about canceling the rest of the festivities. I still can't believe how inadequate the warning systems were for this big of a storm. Then again, I don't think anyone planned it would hit as early as it did either." Mom is doing the thing where she talks with her hands. Only, this time, she's holding a knife. Zane and I both fight to hide our smiles every time she starts getting too excited. But Dad just goes on eating between like it's no big deal that he has to dodge out of the way every time she gets too close.
"Oh, but you should have seen the mayor trying to wrangle that chubby little schnauzer of hers off the stage. Poor thing got all tangled up in the sound equipment cords. It was quite the spectacle!"
"Sounds like I missed out on some prime entertainment," I say between mouthfuls.
Zane leans back in his chair and glares at me from across the table. "I don't know, little brother. Sounds like you had plenty of entertainment down there at the clinic."
"Oh, yes! That must have been awful losing power. Were you at least able to keep warm?" Mom's eyes dart to mine, oblivious to Zane's underlying accusations.
"Nope. Pretty uneventful," I say, not backing down from his stare. "Jack got off light with a sprain. No broken bones. Doc got him fixed right up, and the rest was riding out the storm until the roads were drivable."
"Really?" He lifts an eyebrow. "And this doctor. Was she…?"
"He," I interrupt. "Let's see… What was his name? Dr. Weber, I believe it was?" I hate lying. And even more so, I hate that I'm lying to Zane. But it's none of his business that I spent Christmas Eve holed up with the same attractive woman he screwed things up with when he had the chance. Besides, Shay would kill me if she ever found out she was a topic of conversation at the Ralston family breakfast table.
"Huh. That's… interesting." I can tell he's irritated by the way he drums his fingers on the table. His eyes stay fixed on me, searching for any hint of deception, but I keep my face neutral, secretly hoping he'll drop it already until Dad finally clears his throat.
"So, Colt, how are things going with the unit? Any new developments with the K-9s?"
I casually set down my fork, refusing to give Zane a reason to call my bluff. "Good. Actually, I’ve been waiting for the right time to bring it up, but... you know how I told you guys I’m up for reenlistment in September?” Mom and Dad nod while Zane leans forward in his chair. “Well, I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, and I think it’s time for a change. I’ve been working on this idea for a new K-9 program, and I’m finally ready to commit.”
Mom’s eyes light up. “A K-9 program? That sounds wonderful! But… what kind of K-9 program?” I watch her eyes shift nervously to Dad’s as he reaches over and places a steadying hand over hers before returning his attention to me. I don’t even bother looking at Zane this time.
“Well… It would be a non-profit. I’ve spent the last year and a half researching and putting together a business plan. I’m calling it The Retired Heroes Project. It’s going to be a rescue program for retired military work dogs.” I pause and look back across the table at Dad. But he doesn’t stop me. He only nods for me to continue.
“I figured, there are a lot of retired military K-9s that need homes. Jack got lucky when you found him at the local shelter, but that's not the case for all of them. So why not start a program that can help? One that can help with rehabilitation if necessary, then place retired work dogs with veterans. Or families who understand their special needs."
Dad gives an approving nod. "Sounds like a solid idea, son. Something like that could really make a difference around here."
I finally let my eyes glance back at Zane, whose expression remains neutral, bordering on boredom. Not that I'd expect anything different.
"I hate to bust your bubble, but do you even know the kind of money it would take to fund something like that?" Zane's tone comes across as dismissive, but I know the idea of me doing something different with my life has him reeling. His only ambition in life has been to climb the ranks and become a military god. And who could blame him? He may be a self-centered jerk, but there’s no denying he loves his country. And there aren't many I know willing to work as hard as he does to defend it.
But that's exactly why he'll never understand how I could choose a different path. He never struggled in school like I did. After high school, Zane graduated from West Point with honors and was only twenty-seven when they promoted him to captain four years ago. He might give me grief because I never used any of my tuition assistance benefits to go to college, but that doesn't mean I'm any less capable of doing my homework. "Like I said… I've already done the research. I'm well aware of the financial responsibility that comes with starting a non-profit."
Mom reaches a hand across the table and places it over mine. “I’m so proud of you for wanting to help others, honey. You’ve got such a good heart.”
“You’re mother’s right. We’re both proud of you. I’m sure there’s still a lot you’ll need to figure out, but the military has great programs that can help you transition when you’re ready to join the workforce. You’ll still want a good-paying job if you’re planning on leaving before retirement. But whatever you need, you have our full support. Zane’s as well.”
Dad shoots Zane a stern look, and Zane falls in line. “Yeah, sure. Whatever.”
“Great,” Dad says slapping a hand on the table, “Now that that’s settled, who’s ready to open some presents?”
“Oh yes, presents!” Mom chirps. “I’ll just clean up in here and then we can all—”
“Why don’t you and Zane head into the living room? Zane, go ahead and get a fire going and Colt and I will finish up in here. And you…” he says, standing from his chair and pulling our mom into his arms. “You can go make yourself comfortable. You’ve done enough already.” He leans in for a long, slow kiss, that makes Zane and I uncomfortable enough to both clear the room.
“So, son,” Dad says casually when he finds me hiding in the kitchen. He’s carrying a plate of leftovers and stops to retrieve the aluminum foil from a drawer by the fridge. “Care to tell me who you were really with at the clinic last night?”
I freeze on my way to the sink to start on the pots and pans. “What do you mean?” I turn to face him.
His eyes are fixed on me as he tears a sheet of foil from the roll and begins wrapping the quiche. “You said you were with Dr. Weber but seeing how I ran into him in town yesterday, I figure maybe you’d gotten your wires crossed.”
My mind races. I hadn’t even thought about Dr. Weber being at the festival. “I, uh...”
He opens the fridge, placing the quiche on the bottom shelf before turning to put the leftover bacon and sausages into a Ziplock bag. “Look, Colt. You don't have to lie to protect your brother. Your mother told me how Zane used to run around with the new vet that works up there.”
Dad hands me the empty plate, and I turn to rinse it in the sink and load it into the dishwasher. “I know it looks bad, but it’s not what you think. Nothing happened, I swear.”
When I turn, he lays an easy hand on my shoulder. “Son, give your old man some credit. Your mom’s not the only one who knows what kind of man she raised.”
I feel some of the tension melt from my shoulders. “Thanks, Dad. It’s just... Zane’s not the one I’m trying to protect here. Shay, she’s something else. I’ve never met anyone like her.”
“Well, then… what’s stopping you?” He raises an eyebrow.
I wipe my hands on a dish towel, then toss it on the counter before folding my arms across my chest and leaning back against the sink. “It’s complicated. You didn’t see the look on her face when I told her I was military. And if that weren’t enough, she practically shut down when she found out Zane was my brother. It was like watching a wall go up. I’d love a second chance, but who knows if I’ll ever see her again. And even if I did, what would I say?”
He nods thoughtfully. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned about your brother, it’s that he’ll always be married to his career. But you? Honestly, your mother and I are both a little surprised you haven’t settled down and started a family yet.”
“Really?” I try to hide my surprise, but it comes out an octave higher than usual.
“Trust me, I know how hard it is to find a good woman when you’re moving around all the time. But your mother taught me the secret to making any relationship work is by not being afraid to fight for it in the first place.” He pauses, then adds, “You know… when I talked to Dr. Weber at the festival, he said they’ve been having some trouble down at the animal shelter and they’re desperate for volunteers. I figure, maybe if she’s there, you’ll figure out the right thing to say. That second chance might be closer than you think.”