Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Alison made a promise to herself the following morning. It was a simple promise. One that should have been relatively easy to follow. Darn simple, because it was that straightforward.
As for what that promise was? That she would keep her big mouth shut.
Every time that I speak with the Earl, it leads to a fight. And every time that we fight… that thought alone sent a pulse racing up her body. And while she rather enjoyed how it felt, she knew too it would be better for everyone involved if it did not happen again.
As luck had it, Alison was presented with the perfect chance to put this promise to the test the following morning.
She woke later than she expected, positively worn out from the previous day, enjoying the warmth of her bed as she listened to the storm howling beyond the walls.
Also, on a subconscious level, she felt it would be best to arrive late at breakfast. Maybe if she did, the Earl would not be there, and she could start her day without succumbing to temptation.
Of course, this was not the case, and no sooner did she walk into the breakfast room did she find the Earl sitting at the head of the table.
“Oh.” She started and came to a stop when she saw him.
Her heart leapt through her throat, that same pulse raced through her body, and her thighs began to tremble because all that she could remember in that moment was the kiss they had shared and how good it felt…
how good it still felt because her lips tingled as they had been doing since last evening.
The Earl looked up and saw her in the doorway. “Good morning.”
His expression was flat and disinterested. No sense at all that he was experiencing the same reaction as she was. He watched her for a moment and then bowed his head, returning to his plate of food.
“How did you sleep?” he then asked simply.
She hesitated further. She considered turning and leaving the room. And she might have done, was there a point to it. Alison was trapped in this home until her parents came back for her, which she hoped to be soon, while also secretly wondering if there was a chance that they might never return…
No! She shook her head to dislodge such thoughts. I do not want to be here. The sooner that I can leave the sooner that I can forget what happened.
“I slept well, thank you.” She walked into the room, doing her best to appear nonchalant, only too aware of the way her knees shook with each step. “And you?”
“Well enough,” he said without looking.
She sat down at the end of the table, as far from him as she could. Watching him, Alison felt a pang in her chest at how dispassionate he acted. It should have been a relief, making her promise that much easier to keep.
What it did instead was remind her of what life was like before she met the Earl. A life in which she was ignored. A life in which nobody could see her or cared to try. And that the Earl had for a short time… that, beyond anything else, was what had drawn her to him in the first place.
“I…” Her voice cracked. “I hope to hear from my parents today.”
“As do I,” he said.
“With any luck, I will be on my way north by this evening.”
“Let us hope.”
She frowned at the top of his head, frustration growing. The urge to bait him, to say something that she knew would anger and lead to an argument just so he would look at her…
But Alison, as stubborn as she was, was no fool. What happened between them two times now could not happen again. So it was that she committed to her initial promise. To say as little as possible, while praying the Earl was of the same mind. It was, she knew, for the best.
They ate in silence.
It was not a companionable silence by any measure.
The tension sat heavy between them, the type that suffocated so it was all that Alison could focus on.
She would find herself constantly glancing at the Earl, unable to help but look at him.
She wanted him to go on ignoring her, while she also wanted him to notice her and say something.
What is wrong with me? How can I wish for something that I know is so wrong? How can I even justify wanting that which I am right to avoid?
Alison supposed it came down to her stubborn nature. She refused to accept the Lord Grayhill was able to simply put aside what happened between them, and she could only assume he was doing this to test her. He wanted her to break the silence.
“What are your plans for today?” she asked before she could help herself.
“What was that?” he asked, looking at her finally. His expression was still disinterested, but at least he had noticed her.
“Today,” she repeated. “I assume you have made plans.” She smiled pleasantly. “For us.”
“For us?”
“I am still your guest, no? And seeing as you are not allowing me to return home, I thought you might have planned for a way to keep me entertained.” Her smile grew.
He studied her, surely knowing what she was doing. She raised an eyebrow, daring him to take the bait. Dammit, she needed him to. Her pulse was already quickening at the thought, and seeing as she would hopefully be leaving here today, why not see how far she could push things…
“I have not considered it,” he said. And then, before she was able to retort, he added quickly, “But if there is anything you would like to do, please feel free to inform me. I am sure I will be able to accommodate.”
“Should you not be the one coming up with ideas? Seeing as this is your home.”
“I would have thought you were far too independent to rely on one such as me for entertainment. I would not presume to treat you like a child.”
“Too late for that.”
He did not bite. He did not stiffen. He remained casual and removed, determined not to give in to her pestering. “I will confer with my valet, Godfrey,” he said. “See if he might have some ideas. Truly, I apologize for not thinking ahead.”
Alison narrowed her eyes at him, annoyed that he was being so congenial. It also hurt a little.
“Th – thank you,” she stammered stupidly, feeling like a fool for trying to bait him. “I look forward to it.”
She returned to her breakfast and the silence grew. Thankfully, it broke minutes later when Godfrey swept into the room. And he had with him a letter.
“My lord!” he hurried toward the Earl. “A letter has just now arrived. A response, I believe, from Lord Pemberton.”
“Already?” Lord Grayhill sat up and reached for the letter, only to pause without taking it. “Perhaps it is Lady Alison who should read it?”
“Oh.” Alison blinked, surprised by his gesture. “Yes… thank you.”
Godfrey handed her the letter, and she was quick to unravel it. And then read it. And then succumb to feelings of dread because the letter bore what could only be interpreted as bad news.
“Well?” Lord Grayhill prompted her. “What does it say?”
“It is from my mother…” Her stomach churned.
“She apologizes for the inconvenience but…” She grimaced and put the letter down.
“It seems that the storms are even worse up north. Apparently, the roads are hazardous, impossible for a carriage to travel. As such, he will not be returning to collect me for at least…” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “At least two weeks.”
“Two weeks?”
“The rider confirmed the same,” Godfrey added. “The man said it was a miracle that he was able to return at all. He found the Baron’s carriage on the way, then he left in the middle of the night to return here so quickly. It was quite treacherous, he claimed.”
Alison bowed her head as the room collapsed upon her.
Her family leaving her had been hard enough to deal with.
That they had not come immediately back had made things worse.
But she had resolved not to let the morosity of the situation break her, knowing that soon she would be with them and all this would be was a bad memory.
Perhaps it would even force a change in how her family treated her, the beginnings of something new…
That, she now realized, to be highly idealistic and the stuff of fantasy.
She would not be with her mother for Christmas.
She would not be with her siblings to see them open their presents.
She would be alone, hundreds of miles away, forced to reckon with what she always knew but was only just now coming to accept: that she was on her own in this world, and that she always would be.
“I am so sorry, Lady Alison…” The Earl’s voice was surprisingly gentle. “I cannot imagine how you must feel.”
She laughed bitterly, head still bowed. “Oh, it is quite fine. I suppose I should have expected it.”
“It is not right,” he said. “To be left alone over Christmas. Regardless of the circumstances, I would not wish it upon anyone.”
“Thank you…” She looked up and found Lord Grayhill watching her with pity.
It was so strange how he filtered between coldness and honesty.
How at one moment he judged her openly, only for the next to show her a side that suggested at a far more welcoming nature.
“But I will be fine. Truly, this is an accident and nothing more.”
If only I believed that…
“Godfrey,” Lord Grayhill said. “See that Lady Alison’s room is set for the following two weeks.”
“The next two weeks?” Alison stammered
“Yes.” He frowned. “Until your family returns. I do not expect you to spend those two weeks alone, Lady Alison. All things considered, and as far as I am concerned, you will be staying here. Unless…” He raised an eyebrow in question. “… that is a problem?”
She did not have the strength to fight him.
She did not want to. For the first time, the fight left Alison, and she could not force herself to pretend that she was better off on her own.
In that moment, she needed to be told that she had someone to look after her, someone to care for her as her family would not do.
And that it was the Earl… better him than nobody.
“No,” she said meekly, forcing a smile. “No problem here.”
“Good.”
She laughed awkwardly. “But for two whole weeks? Let us hope we do not end up killing one another.”
“Oh, that won’t be a problem,” he said as he continued to eye her down the table. His eyebrow was still raised, his posture confident and commanding. “So long as you behave yourself.”
It was the way he watched her again that did it. His stare trained on her, unblinking and all-knowing as if he could see right through her. As if in that moment he understood her completely…
It sent a ripple through her body. A pulse directed right into her heart. Alison’s mind went back to that kiss, how it had made her feel, and how she hoped it made the Earl feel also. If he felt anything at all…
Staying here for two weeks was the right thing to do. If not for her own safety, so that she would not be alone. But as she looked at the Earl, as she smiled her obedience and thanks, she also could not help but wonder if this was not the worst idea in the world.
Could Alison behave for two whole weeks? Could Lord Grayhill? They were going to find out. And, as had already been proven several times over, they would be doing so the hard way.