Chapter 21
The stars are finally aligning.
"Let's sit at the bar and have a drink before we go upstairs?
" I suggested as we walked through the lobby after a day of fun.
We'd eaten hot honey shrooms that tasted like fried chicken and waffles, then taken a walk around the museum district, talking about our childhoods and families.
I told him that my childhood had been good and that my family was full of happily married couples.
His family had plenty of never-married or divorced people, except for his maternal grandparents, who were still crazy about each other, and his role models about relationships.
He didn't want a relationship like his parents, who never married, and didn't want to be a "baby boy," as he described his father.
A boy in a man's body who expected the world to care for him.
He bragged that his mother did a damn good job raising him and his brother alone and that he couldn't complain about his childhood either.
Once we grew tired of walking and sightseeing, we took an Uber to T-Mobile, and he picked up a new cell.
After that, I challenged him to a go-kart race, which he won by two seconds, and I blamed my long dress for making me lose.
Lastly, we'd gone to dinner at Eddie V’s, a popular steakhouse.
Carter knew one of the staff, so we didn't have to wait in the long line to eat the best crab fried rice and ribeye I'd ever eaten.
Today had been the best date and the most fun I'd had.
Our day together was a montage of what I'd always read or heard about.
We laughed and flirted, and the conversation flowed easily.
Even his PDA was appropriate. A possessive touch on my lower back, hand, or shoulder.
Or a kiss on my cheek and a strong, conciliatory hug when he beat me in the race.
Carter St. Patrick had made my birthday amazing, and had I not had sex with Grey, I would be jumping his bones the minute we were alone.
Although I didn't regret giving Grey my virginity, I hated that I couldn't be with Carter like I knew he wanted for this weekend. Like I wanted before Grey.
I was meant to be with Grey last night. How else could I explain the timing of it all?
Carter would have been with me last night had he not lost his phone, and we would have had sex.
And although I'm sure it would've been good, it wouldn't have been Grey.
Ironically, the two men never saw each other, despite having been in the hotel at the same time.
No doubt, I was meant to be with Grey last night.
Moving forward was another question. Carter made it almost impossible for me not to want to be with him.
Our values were similar, and he did believe in marriage and family.
One day, he pictured himself with a wife and three children in a sprawling ranch house.
Whether he said it because he was trying to impress or meant it, Carter drew me closer to him.
"Since it's your 21st, let's have a drink." Carter grinned.
"You don't drink," I reminded him as we settled at the corner of the bar, away from the entrance for privacy.
"I will tonight. Want to celebrate your birthday and how much fun we're having." He then addressed the waiter, "Get us both margaritas."
I tugged on his tatted forearm. "Didn’t your Mama tell you not to order for me?”
Carter cleared his throat. “Okay...what do you want?”
I winked at the waiting bartender. “A margarita.”
The waiter laughed while Carter only shook his head.
My phone buzzed, which had been happening all day, with family and friends calling or texting me happy birthday messages. So, Carter had become accustomed to my phone throughout the day. This time, when I looked down, it was from Grey.
Are you still at the hotel? Did you ever hear from Carter?
I came in second for the first race, won the others, and am now celebrating with the team.
One step closer to the Olympics!! This is the first time I had my cell.
Wish you were here. I’ll make the Sprite floaties with grenadine and cherries when I get home tomorrow evening. 8:35 pm
Overjoyed by his victories, I smiled as I read the text.
It was the type of text he’d always sent when he traveled.
Grey had never been much of a talker or a phone person.
I’m glad he refrained from making the text sweet or a reminder of our night together.
After my fun day with Carter, I wanted to return to my friendship with Grey. I texted back,
CONGRATS!! I KNEW YOU would kill it. You can tell me all about it tomorrow over my floatie. 8:37 pm.
“Is that from him?” Carter’s tone held envy and a hint of sadness.
I’d promised myself I wouldn’t lie anymore. “Yes. Grey won his race today. They’re competing out in Austin.”
His jaw tightened, and the good vibes between us began to fade. “Oh, then you were never going to spend your birthday with him, and apparently, you’re not mad at him anymore.”
It was now or never. I put my phone back in my Gucci wristlet, a gift from my mother, and took a deep breath. “Confession time, and I hope it doesn’t change how you feel about me.”
He quirked a brow. “What do you think I feel? Wait...I have a better question: how do you feel about me?”
“Are you stalling?”
Carter averted his intense gaze and sipped on his drink.
“Okay, let’s just say that I like you so much. So much that I pretended my best friend was my boyfriend,” I replied and took a huge sip of margarita, deciding to pull the band-aid off in one snatch.
Carter almost spit his drink out, and I took his glass from his hand so he could quickly wipe his mouth. “Say what?”
“Grey is my best friend. Remember the day I moved in, and you asked me about Grey? I told you then he was my friend.”
He nodded slowly. “Then why lie?”
“The day you gave me a ride home, you assumed he was more, and you seemed more interested in me because I was already taken. It sounds stupid now, but I was afraid I couldn’t keep your attention, being just me.
Grey agreed to play along because he knew how much I crushed on you.
We sleep in different rooms, and I share a room with my other best friend.
I can show you our setup when we get back home. ”
He frowned. “Then why did you jump out of his truck, and the dude acted like he wanted to fight me?”
“He wanted to fight because both of you have huge egos, and he didn’t like that I chose you over him. A man he believes will only hurt me.”
I watched him as he processed what I just told him. I prayed he wouldn’t ask if I was intimate with Grey because I would be honest. But if he didn’t ask, I wouldn’t volunteer that bit of information.
“We never had to sneak around?”
I shook my head.
He scoffed loudly. “I said you lie easily.”
“Something I didn’t know until you. I didn’t want to lie. I just wanted your attention.”
Carter pointed to his chest. “You’ve always had my attention.”
“You know what I mean.”
“No, I don’t.” Carter’s forehead furrowed into a V.
“You’re no different than him. Judging me like I’m so shallow that you have to play games with me like I’m a fucking toy.
Neither of you knows shit about me except I play fucking football.
You ain’t never heard shit about me with women because I’m too busy to be caught up with drama.
From day one, I made it clear that I was attracted to you.
That I noticed you last spring. Knew your name, though we never said a word to each other.
I shared parts of me with you that I’ve never shared.
No one knows that my brother has sickle cell, or that I don’t want to play football anymore, but you and my family.
Fuck. Darren, you’re the only woman who has ever met my family, and still, you hold on to this lie.
If I were just Carter from philosophy class, who asked you out and not Carter St. Patrick, star quarterback, would you have such a hard time doubting my feelings for you?
” He jabbed the counter. “This whole week, I waited for you to change your mind about being with me this weekend because I thought you might go back to Grey. I was actually nervous because that’s how much I care.
Then, after everything I went through last night for you, I had to convince you to believe me this morning.
And I haven’t lied to you about any fucking thing. ”
Deep shame filled me that I’d judged him based on who I believed him to be, not what he’d shown me.
I tugged on the end of his polo shirt. “I’m sorry.
You’re right about everything. I live in this fantasy world where I believe in romance, and the nerdy girl gets the hot guy.
You were my fantasy that became real, and I didn’t know how to handle it. ”
“Did it ever occur to you that you’re my fantasy?” Carter replied hoarsely.
Tears burned the back of my eyes at how much I underestimated him and me, how I underestimated us. In my wildest dreams, I never thought he might have felt the same way.
“And I’m not this hot guy crazy over a nerd.
I’m Carter, who likes Darren, the smart-ass, sexy woman from my class.
The woman I believed would never give me the time of day because I’m a football player.
” He suddenly rose, pulled cash out of his pocket, and left forty dollars on the bar. “Turns out I was right.”
I watched him leave the bar helplessly. Unsure what to say or do to make him stay. I was so afraid to be played that I inadvertently hurt him. I looked at my phone again, stepped away from the bar, and leaned against the wall.
“Hey...what’s up?” I could hear background noise when he answered. Maybe a restaurant.