Chapter Twenty-Six
B ecause it was prom night and our parents had given us a bit of leeway, we stayed at the house until two a.m., even though my heart wasn’t in it.
I drank the vodka and didn’t feel remotely drunk; I offered up my own stories about sixth form, about my overly passionate media studies teacher and how easily distracted he was; we laughed and joked and Kira and Freddy were drunkenly affectionate, knowing they would be apart for the summer at the very least.
When we finally left Tyller Klos behind, I imagined the Rosevar family watching us from the windows, their brows pinched as we made slow work of the undergrowth in our finery.
The sky was a rich, royal blue dusted with stars, as if it hadn’t wanted to get completely dark, as if it was enjoying the summer too much.
I’d heard nothing more from Ethan since that one message, and I’d given up playing it cool. I’d sent him a handful of replies, and I’d called him, but it had gone to voicemail every time.
Kira slid her arm through mine as we walked down the hill. ‘He’ll be OK,’ she slurred, giving me a wide grin.
‘Of course he will be.’ I aimed for confident. ‘He’s had to stay at home because Sarah’s managed to ground them both, that’s all. I bet he’s annoyed he missed the prom.’
‘You in that mermaid dress most of all.’
We said goodbye at my front door, the gentle rasp of the sea our early morning soundtrack, and I crept up to my room, wondering if Mum was listening to me get home, confused at why there weren’t two sets of footsteps climbing the stairs.
My sleep was light and disturbed, so I sat bolt upright the moment my phone pinged. I looked at the clock on my bedside table: it was just after six a.m.
Are you awake? Can I come round?
I replied immediately: Yes and yes .
I’ll be there in 15.
I put a thin cardigan on over my sleep shorts and T-shirt, and went downstairs to put the kettle on.
Twenty minutes later Ethan messaged that he was outside, and I hurried down the hall, relief shooting through me when I could see his tall silhouette in the wavy glass of our front door.
I pulled it open, not sure what I wanted to say to him, but every opening line was knocked out of me when I saw him.
He was in his white shirt, black jacket and trousers, the bare bones of the tux I had expected to see him in last night, but his tie was long gone, and what remained was in tatters, the shirt stained with something dark and ripped at the hem.
Ethan’s eyes were red-rimmed, his cheeks hollowed out with exhaustion, and his thick hair was a disaster.
The way he looked at me sent a shiver running over my skin.
I pulled him inside and wrapped my arms around him. He was rigid to begin with, and only softened slightly when I tightened my hold. ‘What happened?’ I leaned back and looked up at him.
‘Can we go to your room?’ His voice was rough, unused.
‘Of course. You go up, I’m going to make us tea.’
He nodded and trudged up the stairs, using the handrail to haul himself up. My mind was racing as I re-boiled the kettle, got the teabags and milk ready.
I took the tea up to my room and found Ethan sitting on my bed, his elbows on his knees. He was right on the edge, as if he was already preparing to leave.
‘Hey.’ I held the mug out to him.
‘Thanks.’ He stared at it for a moment, then put it on the floor, turning to face me when I sat on the bed, leaning against the pillows.
‘You can come up here, you know.’
He rubbed a hand over his face, then crawled over the duvet to sit beside me, angling his body towards mine.
‘What happened?’ I asked again.
He held my gaze for a moment, then looked down at the covers. ‘Sarah stole Mum’s car.’
My mind went blank. Sarah, Ethan’s little sister, who was only just sixteen. I knew she was reckless, but this sounded crazy. ‘What?’
‘She got in a huge fight with Mum after school – I don’t know what about – and she stormed out, which wasn’t unusual, so I just … I thought she would blow off steam, then come home. She called me just as I was about to leave to meet you.’
‘Is she OK?’ It had taken me too long to ask, I realized.
‘She’s OK,’ Ethan said, and my shoulders slumped with relief.
‘Why did she call you?’
‘Because she didn’t know what to do. She’s too young to drive, but she’d taken Mum’s car, swiped the keys and driven off into the countryside, and then she crashed it.’
‘Shit.’ I put my hand on Ethan’s arm, but wasn’t sure he noticed. ‘But she’s OK?’
‘She was shaken up, she sounded frantic when she called me. She asked me to come and meet her, to not tell Mum and Dad.’
‘You didn’t tell them?’
He looked up at me. ‘She’s been in so much trouble. She got a caution in York for criminal damage, and—’
‘She’s been in trouble with the police ? Oh my God.’
‘I went to meet her. I had to walk, because I didn’t have any other way of getting there, and …’ He leaned back against the pillows, covered his eyes with a hand. ‘Mum’s car was on fire.’
‘She’d set it on fire ?’ It came out as a squeak.
‘She hadn’t, but she spun the car when she crashed, and the back end hit a rock in the verge. She damaged the fuel tank, and … she wanted me to fix it.’
Anger hardened inside me. ‘Ethan.’
He shrugged, looking defeated, and I tried to squash it down. ‘She didn’t know what to do, but the car was on fire and there was a farm building, some kind of barn, so I didn’t have a choice. We couldn’t just pretend it hadn’t happened or drive the car away from the scene.’
I felt cold all over. ‘What did you do?’
‘I called the police, the fire brigade. I said that I’d been driving the car, that I’d crashed it.’
The chill shivered through my body. ‘You told them you’d stolen it?’
He nodded.
I got off the bed, walked the three paces to the door, then came back. ‘Why would you do that?’
‘Because it isn’t as bad if I’ve taken Mum’s car without her permission. I can drive, I’m on the insurance. And Sarah’s been in enough trouble.’
‘And she keeps getting away with it, because you keep bailing her out.’
‘That’s not fair. Mum and Dad come down so hard on her.’
‘Because she’s being an idiot,’ I said. ‘Though I didn’t realize it was a criminal idiot. Ethan, you cannot cover for her.’
‘She’s my little sister.’
‘Yes, and she makes her own choices.’ I flung my arms wide.
‘She makes her choices, and you make yours. You’ve got such big plans – you’re going to be an architect.
You need a degree and credentials and a good reputation and for people to trust you with their stuff.
You can’t be convicted of stealing and destroying a car.
’ My throat thickened, the reality of what he was risking seeping into my bones. ‘You just can’t.’
‘But it’s a first offence,’ he said. ‘Mum and Dad won’t press charges, so it’s mostly that I caused the crash, started the fire. Dad has a good lawyer, so—’
I slumped onto the bed. ‘So you actually did it? You’ve been interviewed and cautioned and …’
Ethan nodded. He was looking at me warily, but there was something closed-off about his expression, too. He felt far away from me. ‘They just released me. They think I’ll get off with a caution – or a fine – for careless driving. It’s a first offence, a mistake.’
I shook my head, my tears falling freely. ‘You can’t do this. You’ll have a criminal record, and you think it’ll make Sarah change her behaviour?’
‘It’s done now. I can’t go back.’ Agitation crept into his voice when he added, ‘It was the right thing to do.’
‘It wasn’t.’ I got up again, not knowing where to put myself. ‘What about your future? You have worked so hard, and you’re such a good person. You’re messing up your whole life for her.’
‘I’m not. It’ll be fine.’
‘And if they work out you covered for her, you’ll get done for that … that perverting the course of justice thing. That’s serious! I can’t believe your dad agreed to this!’
‘By the time he knew about it, it was too late. Georgie, please don’t cry.’ I wiped frantically at my eyes, and saw that he was holding his arms out. I wanted to crawl into them, to comfort him, but I couldn’t believe he would risk everything like this.
‘You know we only have one chance at this, right?’
‘I’ll be fine,’ Ethan said again.
‘But you’re not fine right now. And it’s not just that you’ve been up all night and interviewed under caution and been in a cell when you should have been with us. You’re putting on a brave face for me, and I don’t want you to do that. I don’t want any of this to have happened.’
‘You think I do? You think I want to have missed our last night at the house? A chance to celebrate everything? You think I wanted to end up at the police station in Truro? I couldn’t just leave her there, could I?’
‘You should have got your mum and dad involved! Got them to take responsibility for once. I hate that they leave it to you, that you don’t stand up to them!’
‘Oh, and you do?’ Ethan’s eyes were blazing.
‘You stand up to your mum when she stops you going out, makes you get her pills, or take her to her trial appointments while she’s smoking weed and ruining it for herself?
I don’t see you standing up to her, Georgie.
What if, when it comes to it, she stops you from going to university? ’
‘She’s ill!’
‘And Sarah’s miserable. She’s ill too, basically, and she’s my family. I’m not just leaving her.’ He hung his head, the fight going out of him. He picked Connor the cuddly turtle off my desk and squeezed him.
My tears were falling faster, Ethan’s accusations and mine swirling in my head. He was right about Mum, but I loved her, and I knew that he loved Sarah too, but it felt so different to me. ‘You need to put yourself first, or you’ll never get to do what you want. All your dreams will just be gone.’
‘Yeah, well.’ He let Connor drop to the bed. ‘Some things matter more than a stupid dream that isn’t going to happen anyway.’
‘What?’ I swallowed. ‘You’re going to achieve yours. Out of all of us, you’re the one who’s going to do it. You’re going to qualify as an architect and then you’re going to come back here and turn Tyller Klos into something magnificent. You’re going to give it a new life.’
‘That was always a fantasy. It’s never going to happen.’
‘Don’t say that.’
‘I need to go home.’ He stood up. ‘Dad’s expecting me.’
‘Is he proud of you for doing this? For taking the blame?’
‘I need to go, Georgie.’
‘And what about us?’
He stopped in the doorway, turning to look at me. ‘What about us?’
I didn’t know how to say all the things I was feeling.
It had been bad enough when he’d abandoned me to cover for Sarah, but the thought that he was prepared to abandon his principles, his own future, for someone who probably wouldn’t even be grateful – who might not change her destructive ways – was crushing.
‘I just never thought you would do something like this,’ I told him.
‘I didn’t … I don’t know if you’re who I thought you were. ’
I wasn’t sure how I’d meant it to come out, but the moment I said it I knew I couldn’t take it back.
I saw it hit: how he suddenly looked even more devastated.
I took a step towards him, but he folded his arms, putting a barrier between us.
‘Probably better you realise that now,’ he said.
‘Better that I let go of that dream as well, do it all in one night.’ He turned away from me, and I saw him swallow. ‘Bye, Georgie.’
I could have said something. I could have called him back, told him we could survive it all, but I didn’t.
It was as much an answer as if I’d spoken.
He hovered for a second in the hallway outside my room, waiting for me to give him another chance, but I kept quiet.
I didn’t even say goodbye, and he ducked his head in understanding.
Ethan walked down the stairs and out of my front door, just as the sun was peeking above the hills, dusting Alperwick with the golden promise of another perfect summer’s day.