Chapter Eleven
Luckily, Jaxon led the cattle drive so Willa didn’t have to see Devin. It had ended as quickly as it began. Two more weeks and they were out of here. She wanted to get back to Hollywood and forget all about Devin Callahan. Blinking back tears, she knew that would never happen. He was the man she would always love.
You’re so stupid, Willa. You could be happy.
She snorted. “Yeah, but for how long?” she muttered.
“Did you say something to me, Willa?” Rocky asked her.
“No. I’m talking to myself. I seem to do that a lot lately.”
“I was surprised to see Jaxon taking this trip,” Rocky said as they headed back to the barn.
“Not me. Devin had to know I was on it, so he didn’t want to see me.” She sniffed. “Shit. I am so done with crying.”
Nudging her horse, she rode to the front of the line. She just wanted to get back and not do anything the rest of the day. Just sit in her cabin and watch TV or sulk. She was so ready to get out of here and go home. Back to Hollywood. Back to her job. A job she had no desire whatsoever to do any longer. But what would Rocky do without her? He’d go on, she supposed. Just like any other man, he’d find another woman to take care of him. Shaking her head, she knew that wasn’t fair. Rocky was a good man, and she’d do her best to find him someone he could work with but she was done with that type of work.
“Are you all right, Willa?” Jaxon asked from beside her.
“Wonderful, thank you.” She refused to look at him. He reminded her way too much of Devin.
“If you say so,” he muttered.
Glancing over at him, she narrowed her eyes. “I do.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Nudging his horse, he rode ahead of her.
“Great, now you’ve pissed off both Callahans.” This trip couldn’t be over soon enough.
Before long, she was riding into the barn, and the ranch hands came forward to take care of the horses. Willa handed over her reins and left the barn to head to her cabin. A hot bath and a nap sounded good about now. Sweat trickled between her shoulder blades as she walked at a brisk pace, hoping she didn’t see Devin along the way.
****
Devin stood in the barn Saturday morning waiting on Rocky. When he came striding in, Rocky grinned at him.
“Hey, Dev. What are we going to do today?”
“You and I are taking a ride up through the north pasture. It’s time you got used to galloping Gypsy.”
“Galloping?” Rocky asked him.
“Galloping is the fastest gait of a horse. A run. You need to learn the next step. You’ve learned to walk, trot, and canter. Now, this is the next step. You’re doing fine or I wouldn’t have you do it.”
“All right. I trust you.”
“Good. Come on, let’s saddle them up.”
“That reminds me, what do I do for a saddle for Gypsy when I leave?”
Damn. Did Rocky have to mention he was leaving? If he was going, so was Willa, and Devin was not ready to see her go. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t seeing her anymore he still knew she was at the ranch.
“You can get one through a store or online. You want a good western saddle, and a good one won’t be less than five hundred dollars. I can take you to town next week and help you pick one out. It can be delivered when Gypsy is.”
“Sounds great.” Rocky followed him into the tack room.
Once they saddled the horses, they rode out of the barn to head for the north pasture. It was going to be a glorious day. The sun was already baking the ground, and it was only early morning. Devin just wanted to get away from the ranch. He could have had Rocky ride in the corral but the need to get out was strong, and he wasn’t sure he could stay away from her if he stayed on the ranch. It wouldn’t be much longer, and then they’d be gone. She’d be out of his life, and he’d never see her again.
Damn, that thought hurt. Because he knew she’d be the only woman he’d ever really love. Maybe one day, he’d find someone new but Willa would forever hold a place in his heart. Why did she have to be so stubborn? He told her he was in with love her and her response was that he can’t be. Why? Because she didn’t feel the same about him… hell, the thought of that just ripped a hole in his heart. At night, he’d lay in bed, staring at the ceiling wondering how he was going to go on without her in his life. The pain, at times like a knife in his heart, was just unbearable.
Had he only been a fling for her while she was here? She’d told him she didn’t do flings and especially with younger men. So why had she even bothered then? The sex had been so damn good, and he knew he’d never have that again. Not if he didn’t have Willa. He clenched his jaw so hard, his teeth ached.
Glancing over his shoulder to see Rocky trotting along behind him, Devin smiled. Seemed the man was a born natural when it came to riding a horse. Nodding his head to Rocky, they nudged the horses into a gallop. He laughed when Rocky let out a yell as they tore off through the field.
“I brought fishing poles. They’re in my saddlebags. We’ll just have to put them together. We’ll stop by the pond and relax a while.”
“Sounds good,” Rocky yelled back.
They rode over a crest and down to a large pond where they dismounted and unsaddled the horses to let them graze. He handed Rocky a pole and bait then they took a seat on the bank in the tall grass and cast out their lines.
“Is this the same pond the guests fish at?”
“No, that one is closer to the ranch. This is one only Jax and I use.”
“You and Jaxon have a goldmine here, Dev. I’ve enjoyed my time here a lot, and I hope we’ll keep in touch once we—once I leave.”
“You said it right the first time.” Devin stared at the pond, not really seeing anything.
“Sorry. Willa should stay. She loves you.”
Devin laughed without humor. “No, she doesn’t and no matter what you say I won’t believe it. I laid my heart out to her, and all she could say was that I couldn’t possibly be in love with her.” He shrugged. “I’m done. A man can only be shot down so many times before he finally gets it.”
Rocky leaned back in the grass and stared out across the pond. “It’s beautiful here.”
“Yeah, this is a great thinking spot. Jax and I have both come here to clear our thoughts. No one else comes up here.”
“I’m honored you showed it to me, Dev. I might look into buying some land here and coming back for vacations.”
“Do you even get vacations?” Devin grinned as he pulled on a blade of grass then tore it into strips.
“Actually, I do. But I prefer staying in the States rather than go to other countries. Charity is the same way.”
“Charity?”
Rocky looked at him and smiled. “Charity O’Keefe.”
Devin raised his eyebrows at the mention of the beautiful actress. “I didn’t know you two were an item.”
“Not many do. We’re keeping it quiet. Damn paparazzi ruin everything. ”
Devin reeled his line in then cast out again. After laying the pole down, he leaned back on his elbows. “I’m sure it’s tough being in the spotlight all the time.”
“It can be. That’s why I’d love a place like this to escape to. Are you really giving up on Willa?”
“Yeah, I’m done.” He glanced away and swallowed hard.
When thunder rumbled overhead, both men looked up. Devin saw the dark clouds rolling in. Standing quickly, he reeled his line in, and Rocky did the same. They both quickly took the rods apart and Devin shoved them in his saddlebags. They swiftly saddled the horses then mounted and nudged them into a run to head back to the barn, reaching it just as the sky split open and rain poured down. Lightning flashed across the sky, and thunder shook the building. Horses neighed in distress. Ranch hands ran inside soaking wet but helped Devin and Rocky remove the tack and cool the horses down.
Devin stood in the doorway of the barn and watched as the rain came down in sheets.
“Damn, that came up fast,” Rocky shouted from beside him. The rain hitting the roof made it almost impossible to hear.
“It can do that here,” he shouted back.
“I’m going to make a run for it to my cabin.”
“I can take you in the truck, but we’re going to have to get to it first.” Devin nodded to where the truck sat.
“I’d appreciate it. Let’s do it.”
Giving him a nod, he ran out of the barn with Rocky on his heels. By the time they reached the truck, they were soaked. He closed the door and took his hat off. Rain ran down his face. Using both hands, he pushed his hair back, glanced over to Rocky, and laughed.
“Son of a bitch. I’m soaked,” Rocky said as he took his hat off and tossed it to the floor between his feet.
“Once you get to the cabin, you can take a hot shower. It’s what I plan on doing when I get home.”
He started the truck and drove down the road to Rocky’s cabin. Rain pounded the roof of the cab. The wipers were on full blast, but they couldn’t keep up with the torrential downpour. He drove straight past Willa’s cabin without even glancing that way.
“I hope Willa’s in her cabin.”
“If she’s not, she could be at the lodge. She’s smart, she’ll stay there until this stops. I just hope the power stays on. There are candles in each cabin in case it goes out.” He glanced at Rocky. “I’d get them out if I were you. They’re under the bathroom and kitchen sinks.”
“All right.” Rocky leaned forward to peer through the windshield. “How the hell do you see where you’re going?”
“I’ve been on this road so many times, I could drive it blindfolded.” He stopped in front of Rocky’s cabin.
“Thanks, Dev. I’ll see you tonight at the dance.” Rocky saluted and climbed out then ran for his porch. After giving a wave, he entered his cabin.
Devin slowly drove away from the cabin and down the road then entered the way up to his home. Shit! He’d closed the gate that morning. Throwing the gear into Park, he climbed out and ran to the gate, opened it then ran back to his truck and got in. Rain trickled down the nape of his neck and down his back. Putting the gear into Drive, he drove to the house. He’d close the gate later. Stopping the pickup as close to the back porch as he could, he took a deep breath, threw the door open, climbed out, pushed the door closed, and ran up the steps. He could hear Dolly barking from inside. Even she wasn’t out in this shit. Opening the back door, he entered the kitchen and rubbed Dolly’s ears. He laughed when she shook as if to dispel water.
“You’re not wet, I am.”
Pulling his rain-soaked T-shirt off over his head, he entered the mudroom, tossed it into the hamper, and sat down to remove his boots and jeans then walked naked through the kitchen to the stairs. He climbed them then strode down the hall to his bathroom. A hot shower did sound good right now. Goosebumps popped up as the air conditioning hit his wet skin. After entering the bathroom, he reached into the shower and turned it on. Steam quickly filled the room as he opened the door and stepped inside. He groaned as the hot water hit him and then he reached for the soap, lathered it between his hands, and washed.
Willa seeped into his mind. Damn it! Drawing back a fist, he punched the wall then swore as he shook his hand to alleviate the pain. There wasn’t anything he could do, he was done. He’d never been a man to beg and he sure as hell wasn’t going to start now. She was leaving him, and he couldn’t stop her. Why couldn’t she just go with it? She had to have some feelings for him. She didn’t seem like the type of woman to have sex with just any man who came along. She’d made it clear in the beginning that she didn’t have one-night stands or flings. Then why had she with him? There was so much sexual tension between them and that was probably why she’d given in, but she didn’t love him.
“ Son of a bitch,” he roared.
Taking a deep breath, he washed and rinsed his hair then shut the water off and reached for a towel to dry off. Stepping from the shower, he entered his bedroom and pulled on sweatpants and a T-shirt. It was going to be a long day. The rain was still hitting the tin roof so any further activities scheduled for today would be canceled, and he knew Josie would call the guests to let them know. The dance, however, would still go on and Josie would let the guests know that too. Rain or shine, the dance would go on.
****
Willa sat in her cabin staring out the window at the pouring rain. She’d seen Devin’s truck go by and drop Rocky off. When he drove off, she was sure he never even glanced in her direction. Why should he?
“I don’t know, but I was hoping he would stop.” She shook her head. “You really need to stop talking to yourself.”
Thunder rumbled overhead and shook the cabin. Lightning streaked across the grey sky, and the lights flickered then went out.
“Wonderful,” she muttered.
Pushing herself up from the sofa, she looked for candles. The brochures mentioned that each cabin was supplied with them under the bathroom and kitchen sinks. Since the sky was so dark, it made the cabin hard to maneuver. Feeling her way along the wall to the bathroom, she squatted down to find the candles. After locating them, she found matches and lit them then carried two of them to the living room. They’d been used before, and she wondered how long they would last. Maybe she should call for more?
Nibbling on her bottom lip, she reconsidered that thought since she’d hate to make anyone come out in this weather. She emitted a sudden scream when thunder cracked above the cabin.
“Shit,” she murmured placing her hand over her heart. “I love a good storm as well as the next person, but this is ridiculous.”
Picking up her cellphone, she called Rocky but he didn’t answer. Knowing him, he was napping. How can anyone sleep with all this thunder going on? She jerked when the phone in the kitchen rang, so she made her way there with a candle.
“Hello?”
“Miss Foster, this is Josie at the registration cabin. Do you have enough candles? If not, I can send someone to bring you some.”
Send someone? “Um, who would go out in this weather?”
Josie’s laugh came across the line. “Any staff member I can find. We want to make sure our guests are happy. Do you need more candles?”
Willa’s hope deflated. She was hoping Devin would be the one delivering candles since he was part owner. He’d want to make sure the guests were… satisfied. Shivering, she cleared her throat.
“I’m good, Josie. Thank you.”
“All right and I also need to let you know any activities you planned on attending this afternoon are canceled but the dance is still scheduled. Have a good day.”
Hanging up the phone, Willa made her way back to the living room and took a seat on the sofa. Have a good day? How was she supposed to do that? As far as the dance, there was no way she was going. No way. She knew Devin would be there and she just couldn’t look at him.
Drawing her knees up, she rested her chin on them. He loved her. When he’d said it to her, it took every ounce of her willpower not to jump into his arms and profess her love for him. It didn’t matter because it would never work because she was scared. Too scared he’d leave her. In her heart, she knew it would destroy her way more than when Edwin had left her for a younger woman, and he was forty. Devin was only thirty-one, and he would surely start wanting a younger woman the older Willa got. No. Shaking her head, she knew she just couldn’t chance it. Edwin had done such a number on her that she was already so paranoid about getting involved with another man, but a younger one—oh hell no, that was just begging for heartbreak.
A tear slipped down her cheek as she thought of not having Devin in her life. The time she’d spent with him here was the best time of her life. Only two weeks remained then she’d be gone and never see him again. God! That hurt! When she came here, she had no idea she’d fall in love. It had never entered her mind that she could meet the love of her life here. She’d lived in Hollywood her entire life and never found a man like the cowboy she’d found here. If only he were older.
Raising her head, she stared blankly across the room as realization dawned. Would it make a difference if he were older? Even half the difference? She shook her head. Devin was right. It didn’t matter the man’s age. If he was going to screw around he’d do it whether he was younger or not. The thought of being hurt again by a man she loved was something she was terrified of and she wasn’t going to take that chance again. Yes, she was hurting now but as long as she didn’t stay with Devin, she’d never have to worry about him leaving her for a younger woman. Because she knew that would be the death of her.
Her cellphone rang, and she picked it up to see Rocky’s picture. “Hey, Rock.”
“Hey, I see where you called. I was in the shower.”
“Were you in there when the lights went out?”
“Yeah, I about fell and busted my ass too. Are you all right?”
Willa laughed. “I’m fine. I just wanted to make sure you had enough candles.”
“Yeah, I do. I’m only keeping one lit and carrying it around with me.”
Well, hell. Why didn’t I think of that? “Uh, yeah. I am too.” She blew out the flame on one of the candles. “Are you going to the dance tonight?”
“I think so. I just spoke with Josie. Are you?”
“I… yeah, I want to.”
“Then we’ll go together. I hope the rain lets up soon––”
Thunder boomed overhead rattling her nerves as much as the windows.
“Okay, that was a little close,” Willa said with a nervous laugh.
“Damn close. Okay, Wil, I’ll be over to get you at eight thirty. Be prepared to cut a rug.”
“Cut a rug? Seriously, does anyone still say that?”
Rocky’s laughter came through the phone. “Yeah, my grandma. See ya.”
At eight-thirty, a knock sounded on her door, and she opened it to see Rocky standing there. He’d sure changed since coming to Bur Oak. Gone were the pressed jeans and pointy boots. In their place were faded blue jeans and distressed cowboy boots. She smiled up at him.
“You’re really rocking the cowboy look now.” She teased.
Laughing, he shook his head. “When I think how I looked when I arrived here, I want to hide my head in the sand.”
“I would too, if I were you.” She laughed.
“Shit, Willa. Why didn’t you tell me I looked like an idiot?”
“And miss seeing the looks on Jaxon and Devin’s faces?” She howled with laughter when he tried to grab her. “Let’s go. I’m ready to… cut a rug. ”
“Milady,” Rocky said bending his arm.
Willa looped her arm through his and walked outside. Pulling the door closed behind her, she pocketed her key. She wore jeans with a black tank top and on her feet were sneakers. She planned to be comfortable, especially if she planned on dancing. Knowing how Rocky could dance, she hoped to have enough fun with him to keep her mind off Devin. Like that will happen! In all honesty, she was scared to death to see him, but she knew Rocky wanted her to go to the dance and enjoy herself. There was no way he’d let her sit in her cabin alone.
“The riding lessons are going well, aren’t they?”
“Yep. We went out this morning, before the rain and let the horses run. It was exhilarating. I loved it. Gypsy is a great horse. I called Lucy and told her I want to buy her and I’m having the money wired to her account tomorrow.”
“I’m happy you’re buying her. She is a beautiful horse, and she’ll do fantastic in the movie for you. God, the air smells so good after the rain.”
“It does.” Rocky stopped walking and looked at her. “Are you all right? I mean, really.”
Taking a deep breath, Willa nodded. “I will be. I never should have gotten involved with him, to begin with, Rock. Once we leave here, I’ll forget him.”
“I doubt that. I think you should stay here with him.”
“No. He would only break my heart, eventually. ”
“Like it’s not breaking now.”
“Please let it go.” She looked up at the sky. “It’s so hard to believe it stormed earlier. It’s just a gorgeous night.”
“And you could have this for the rest of your life. No matter what you think, Devin loves you, and you love him. You should stay.”
“I’m not talking about it anymore. Let’s have fun tonight. We only have one more dance here after tonight.”
Rocky stared at her then nodded. He took her hand in his, and they entered the barn to hear the band tuning up. She could do this. She hoped.