Chapter 28
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
ESTEE
M y body is cold, but I don’t shiver. This is a soul deep freeze like death itself has crept into my veins. A frost that lingers, unyielding.
Then, a familiar presence stirs within me, providing not just hope, but a sliver of warmth. Wolf.
Her steady energy moves through me, calming and grounding. She’s with me. We’re not dead. Then again, maybe that would be better.
“Estee?”
My heart soars at the sound of his voice. Theo. Not Orix. Not the shadows. The memory of him showing up replays in my head, but I can’t remember leaving that hell. Gods, please don’t tell me we’re both stuck there.
I try to open my eyes, but my body doesn’t budge and when I try to tell Theo as much, the words don’t make it past my lips. What’s wrong with me?
“I told you,” a woman says, her voice smooth and measured, “she needs rest. What she endured should’ve killed her. The fact that her heart’s still beating is all you need to concern yourself with.” Though her voice sounds familiar, I can’t tell who she is.
Theo growls in response, a deep, guttural sound full of raw frustration and pain. “She’s been resting for two days.” The ache in his words cuts me deeper than anything Orix could’ve done. I want to reach for him, reassure him that I’m still here, and the fact that I can’t, only increases my frustrations.
Then, I feel him. His warmth breaks through the cold, his hands cradling mine as if they’re his lifeline just as they are mine. His heat chases away the frost inch by inch, thawing the parts of me that still seem stuck within the shadow realm.
“Please, Estee.” His voice cracks. “I need you.”
The tether between us, erratic since the moment I stepped foot in Selaris, flares to life. The bond glows, faint at first, but steady. Its energy spreads through my chest, pushing through the lingering cold and extending into my core, my arms, my legs.
“Don’t let go, Theo,” I tell him, even though he can’t hear me. “Don’t ever let go.”
I picture his charcoal eyes, the silver flecks that appear when he’s happy. I remember the way my chest pounded the first time he kissed me, the gentleness in every touch, the way he’s been so patient, even when I didn’t deserve it.
I imagine a future with him, not running, not hiding, but living for our highest good. Together. The thought fuels me, bringing me back from the edge of oblivion. The more I focus on my mate, the harder I pull on our connection, anchoring it to me, the easier it is to accept that there’s no reason to be afraid any longer.
Theo is mine. He’s the other half of my soul, and he won’t ever hurt me. He couldn’t even if he tried.
The knowledge that he would die for me, that we would die for each other and that we never have to be alone again fills me with strength. Not one forged out of a need to survive but a force made of love and compassion.
A bond that can’t be broken.
“Mate.” The word is garbled in my mind, and I’m not sure I’ve even spoken until Theo’s hold on my hands becomes almost painful.
“Estee. Can you hear me?” His voice is full of hope, trembling with emotion. “Oh, Gods. Please say something else.”
“Here.” The word is barely a whisper. I struggle to open my eyes. They burn, but I blink through the pain. I need to see him. “Theo.”
Carefully, he leans over and slides an arm under me, holding me against his chest as he strokes my back. “I thought I was too late.”
“Never,” I promise him. “I knew you’d find me.”
He presses his lips to the side of my head, his body shaking against mine. For several minutes, we just hold each other, soaking in our nearness while the bond pulses with barely restrained power that seems to be bringing my energy back.
“Well, as fun as this isn’t for me, I’m going to go,” the woman says from behind me.
Theo doesn’t lighten his hold on me. “Thank you, Elyn. I owe you my life.”
Elyn? The smooth voice doesn’t sound anything like the elder wolf. But before I can figure that oddity out, a door bangs shut.
My senses begin to return to me. I can feel the softness of the mattress beneath me, the heat from my body being retained by a thick comforter, and the steadying beat of Theo’s heart, soothing any lingering worries.
He finally pulls back, and my vision is clear once again. Theo’s eyes are tense and darker than they should be even though he smiles lovingly at me. “Are you okay? Do you want something to eat or drink? Drea washed and dressed you, but I can start the shower if you want one. Or I can call for?—”
I place my hand over his, stopping him mid-ramble. “I don’t need anything other than what I have right now.” As I sit up, my head spins a little, but there’s at least no pain.
When I glance at my stomach, searching for the wound Orix inflicted, it’s nowhere to be found. “I expected there to be a scar.”
Theo’s fingers brush over the smooth skin. “Thanks to Elyn, there shouldn’t be any trace of that hell left in you, but you might still be tired. You were filled with dark energy when I got you back here. I thought it would kill you, but Elyn said that’s what was actually keeping you alive.”
Once again, I find myself indebted to that wolf and I’m not sure how I feel about that, but that’s something for me to figure out later. As my heart races, I know the only thing I need right now is Theo. Well, and maybe a few answers.
“How did you get me out of there? Did you have to fight him?” I give him a once-over, but there’s nothing of immediate concern.
“He came after us, stabbed me, but thanks to Aurora’s essence, Orix became distracted,” Theo explains. “I didn’t waste a second getting you out of there once I had the chance. I’m so sorry I let this happen to you.”
His eyes pinch closed, and I lift my hand, cupping his cheek. “This is just as much my fate as it is yours. You couldn’t have stopped this from happening even if you knew he was going to take me.”
“He wouldn’t have taken you if you weren’t my mate.” Theo’s head drops further, agony in every line of his face.
“Would you rather I wasn’t your mate then? Because that’s the only way I might’ve been safe,” I challenge, but I still let him hear my compassion.
That finally breaks his self-reproach and has him holding tightly to my arms. “There isn’t anyone else in all the worlds that could be more perfect for me. I just hate that you’ve been put in danger because of my choices.”
“Without those choices, good or bad, you wouldn’t be who you are right now,” I tell him sincerely, holding his stare. “That would be worse than anything else. I know I did my best to push you away and maybe even make you feel like a failure over the state of Selaris, but I see you now, Theo. You’ve always done what you thought was best, and nobody should fault you for that, least of all me.”
He takes a shuddering breath, his body shaking as he draws me close. “I thought you’d hate me for this.”
“I might have wanted to, but that had nothing to do with you and everything to do with my own fears,” I say, steady and sure. “I finally feel you, us. What we can and will be.”
Theo breathes me in, his lips grazing my neck as his shoulders drop. “I’ve been dying to hear that since the moment I sensed your arrival.”
I lean back, needing to see his face again. The strong lines of his jaw, the deep care in his eyes, and the love he exudes even when he doesn’t realize it. My strength is returning with every shared touch.
“I’d say I’m sorry that we were robbed of that moment, of us realizing at the same time that we’re mates, but I’m not.” I offer him a smile. “We’ve each been through hell in our own ways. Our story wouldn’t be ours if it was easy, and now, I can appreciate you even more.”
He blinks, his head seeming to shake with awe. “My Starlight.”
We push toward each other, my need to taste and touch my mate growing more insatiable by the second. Theo’s urgency seems to match my own as he fumbles with the buttons of my silk pajama shirt.
He nips at my neck, and his low growls send shivers down my spine, all the way to my toes and back. “Are you sure?”
I’m already tugging at his pants, but I stop to look into his eyes, holding his gaze. “I’ve only ever counted on myself. It’s been me against the world for centuries. Even with Isla, I’ve felt alone.” I place a light kiss on his lips and settle my hand over his chest. “Being in the shadow realm, I wanted to give up, but then I thought of you, and there was only peace. I knew you’d come for me, but more than that, I needed you to. Not just to survive, but so that I can finally live. You are mine, Theo Northcroft. There are no more doubts, no more waiting. It’s just me and you, now and always, if you’ll have me.”
He wraps his fingers around mine and nods. “Always. For now and every lifetime after this, it will always be us. You’ll never be alone again.”
Our mouths crash together, and even though our bond can’t technically be completed without a ceremony for the gods, our connection grows brighter with every shared touch. Our energies reach for one another with desperate need, just as our bodies do.
We strip free from our clothing, and I fall back onto Theo’s bed, a place I’ve never been before but suddenly have no desire to ever leave.
He starts to lower himself, kissing his way down my chest, and as much as I know every part of him will likely make the stars explode behind my eyes, I need him inside me before I shatter.
“I’ve waited too long for this moment,” I say breathily, bringing him closer for another kiss.
Without needing more explanation, he slides his hand between us and his fingers part my center, making me jump from the feather-light touch.
Gods, this is going to be quick.
“You’re utterly divine,” he whispers, his stare staying on mine as he guides himself toward me.
I reach up, cradling his face and holding him close while he pushes forward. My hips come up, meeting him in the middle, and my legs fall open, needing him as close as possible in this moment.
Theo kisses me, a gentle demand. He inches into me, stretching and filling me completely. I suck in a breath, adjusting to him, my moans of pleasure the only sound in the bedroom.
His teeth scrape over my neck, causing me to clench harder. “I could stay here forever,” he whispers in my ear.
I slide my hands over his back, encouraging him to move again. As much as I agree with that statement, I might also combust, and not in a good way, if we stay still.
His chuckle makes my heart swell. “As you wish, mate.”
Our hips move together, slow and purposefully at first. The glow of our bond pulses within my mind as our bodies collide, and I almost expect a blast of magic to ignite between us, but no such luck.
Delicious tension starts to make my toes curl as he moves over me, kissing every inch that his mouth can reach without breaking our closeness. The coiling of my muscles travels slowly up my legs and around to my spine before striking deep in my core.
I meet his thrusts with renewed eagerness that Theo easily matches. He stops kissing me, his full attention on my face, his eyes staring into mine. “I love you.”
Those three words detonate the last of my restraints. My nails dig into his shoulders and my back arches, pushing my chest into his. My heart feels as though it might break through my skin at any moment.
My lungs work overtime to catch their next gasp of air and spots fill my vision as I blink rapidly, desperately needing to see my mate’s face once again.
When he comes back into view, I give him the biggest smile I’m capable of considering my current state and say what my heart was feeling long before I was ready to admit it. “I love you, too.”
He lightly pushes my hair back, and his grin matches my own. “My mate.”
“As it always should’ve been.”
He brushes his lips over the tip of my nose. “As it always will be now.”