CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE MOLLY
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
MOLLY
I was such a moron.
Throwing myself at him. Doing the whole hand-to-his-chest thing. Being seductive. And it failed! Crash and burn. He rejected me, but man oh man. I felt him. He wanted me. He was into it, but agh. I was so humiliated.
Was it me?
What was I thinking? Of course it was me.
Me. Who else would it have been? Something was wrong with me.
I wasn’t pretty enough, or tall enough, or I don’t know.
It was just me. Who was I kidding? The universe did not like me, but dammit.
No. I refused to go down this path. I’d done too much, endured too much, etched out a damn good life despite my parental seeds. Screw him.
I mean, that’s what I’d been trying to do but aghhhh!
His loss. Right. Totally his loss. He’d be regretting it, except, and this was hard for me to admit, I didn’t think he was regretting it at all.
He was quiet when he got in the vehicle, and despite performing some first aid on his hand, he hadn’t done anything on the whole drive back to the city.
Total silence. Which was uncomfortable, and I didn’t know the driver. He was a new guy.
I knew Elijah and now Avery. I didn’t know this guy.
When we passed the turn for my place, it was then I remembered what else Sophie had said. “My place!” I jerked forward. “Soph said all my stuff was gone. Did you do that? Where’s my stuff?”
He barely reacted, barely looking my way. “Your things were put into storage for safekeeping.”
“What about me? I can’t go into storage. My clothes. My things. My ...” Okay. I wasn’t big on bonding with material things. There were a few items that I’d kill for, but it was mostly Easter Lanes and my friends. I’d slit a throat for them.
And yes, total darkness. I had some in me, but that was an area I liked to pretend wasn’t there. I’d been doing swell for so long. I wasn’t counting “the switch” as part of that, but who was I kidding? I knew it was connected.
Still. I could be pretty dark, and I was back to pretending it wasn’t there. One identity crisis at a time.
“I had your necessities put into a guest room at my place.”
“What?” I thought my humiliation had a time limit. Now it was on a perpetual circling motion, like when the internet wouldn’t connect. “Why? No. I want to go anywhere else. I don’t—”
“It’s for your safety.” His head turned my way.
I was ignoring the whole jaw-clenching thing or how his eyes flashed not to push him on this. I was so pushing. “I don’t want to be around you any more than I need to, and that’s enough of even that. I’ll stay at Pial—”
“Like fuck you will!”
I clamped my mouth shut, my pulse skyrocketing. I was getting heated. “Then Jess—”
“It’s for your safety!” he snapped, through gritted teeth. “The subject is closed.”
“No—”
“ I don’t want you dead! How are you not comprehending that?”
“How are you not comprehending that I don’t give a damn what you want anymore!” I shot back. “I’ll stay with Jess.”
“And put her in danger? Her and her mother—because they stay at her mother’s half the time. Give Jess one more thing to worry about after she lost her best friend?”
God. He was right.
One last thing for Jess to worry about.
I settled. I had to. He was right.
He took a deep breath to calm himself. “I am trying to keep you off the radar of my best friend and MissMontell for that very fact. The sooner we find out who killed Justin and Kelly, the sooner all of this can be put to an end.”
That was true. Jess. Justin. Kelly.
This was all for them.
But I was still embarrassed. The rejection had been swift, and yeah, it stung. Plus, I needed to pee, and the feeling just got worse after I folded my arms over my chest. I had no idea how that worked except that gravity must operate in amazing and complex ways.
I squirmed a little in my seat.
“What’s wrong?”
“That espresso was really good, but ...”
“You have to go to the bathroom?”
“I mean, if you felt the need for a Slurpee, I’d use the bathroom.”
Ashton stared at me for a long time.
I was trying not to squirm, especially under this newest round of attention, but I couldn’t stop myself.
I even did what you’re not supposed to do.
I pressed my legs together, but man oh man.
Sahara. Think of the desert. Dry. Camels.
The heat. The sun. Being delusional and seeing water in the distance.
It wasn’t working. “I have to go bad.”
He nodded, touching a button. “If you could swing through the nearest gas station, please?”
His driver lowered the privacy divider. “We don’t have the usual amount of guards.”
Ashton was studying me again.
I was trying to sit on my hands. Maybe if I tipped my bladder this way, it’d help?
It wasn’t. I glanced at Ashton, and he took that as my response, saying for me, “We’ll have to make do.” He stared at me without blinking. “You’re like a child sometimes.”
“I’m aware.” I huffed, sinking low in the chair. “I’m working on it. There’s a whole list.”
He blinked now, but his gaze was still dry before he looked away. “There shouldn’t be.”
I glanced at him, frowning. What did that mean ...
The driver hit the turn signal and began easing into the next lane toward the exit. “There’s one a block over.”
Ashton watched me as we got off the ramp and turned in to the gas station. The place itself wasn’t heavily populated. It was run down, bars around the clerks and on the windows and doors. Ashton took my arm, holding me in place as the driver went inside.
“He’ll check it first.”
I nodded, still thinking Sahara in my head until reality clicked into place when I saw Ashton pull a gun out of his coat. “What are you doing?”
He frowned. “Are you kidding?”
I flushed, remembering . “Sorry. I forget sometimes. I mean, I don’t, but I do. You’re you, and I don’t know. It’s like I have my own privacy divider to you and what you do in my head. We’re constantly in the back bickering while what you do is in front, you know, with the guns and the guards.”
The driver was returning, so I ignored a very different feeling that came over the back of the car. I pointed at him. “He’s back.”
He opened the door. Ashton got out first and stepped aside to let me lead the way.
I did, ignoring the clerk and a couple other customers inside. The bathroom was empty, thank god, but the lock was pitiful. Holding my bladder, as if that worked, I hauled the giant garbage bin over to block the door. The thing was hella heavy, so it’d do. After that, heaven and relief and yes.
That’s when my phone pinged in my pocket.
I pulled it out, seeing that reception had come back at some point, and saw thirty text messages, sixteen voice messages, and a whole host of other alerts. Holy shit ...
Pialto: WHAT THE HAT, WOMAN?! WHERE ARE YOU?
Pialto: Sorry. What the what. Auto-duck.
Pialto: Your cousin won’t tell us anything!
Sophie: Where are you? Are you alive? Did you have a one-night stand and it’s amazing and you’re taking a day? Please please please tell me that’s what is going on and not something else.
Sophie: Your cousin! Asshole!
Sophie: P is here and we’re both worried. Your cousin told us we could take a week off. What is going on? I’m really worried about you.
Pialto: WE WERE JUST AT YOUR APARTMENT AND THERE WAS NOTHING IN IT?
Sophie: did you mean to move and get a new door?
Pialto: Mrs.Tulip just got back from visiting her sister. She’s beside herself that you’re gone and she didn’t know. She’s blaming herself.
Sophie: Oh, dear. Do you know Mrs.Tulip’s phone number? Could you let her and myself all know you’re okay?
Sophie: Super worried.
Sophie: Love you so much.
Pialto: Is this because of your father? I swear, I SWEAR, I will crack his head open on the pavement the next time I see him.
Pialto: Where are you?
Sophie: Where are you????
Pialto: That’s it! I’m tracking down that cop friend of yours. She will get it done. I know she will.
Pialto: Do you have her phone number?
Sophie: P’s going to get ahold of Jess. I’m not saying this is the best plan, but we’re really worried about you. Your cousin could tell us you’re okay, but he refuses. He’s holding this over our heads. I think he’s enjoying that we’re so worried.
Pialto: Glen is an asshole. Also, I got Jess’s number.
Pialto voice mail (8)
Sophie voice mail (7)
Jess voice mail (2)
Unknown number voice mail
I couldn’t listen to them all, but I’d do what I could do.
Me to Pialto and Sophie in a group message: I’m okay. I’m still with Ashton Walden. Some stuff is going on, but I can’t tell you or you’ll be in danger. I’ll be fine, though. Ashton’s made it very obvious that he doesn’t want me dead.
Pialto calling.
Sophie calling.
I declined both.
Me: I can’t talk now, but I’ll call as soon as I can. Promise!!!
Me: Can you get Mrs.Tulip’s number for me?
Me: Jess, I’m fine. I’m okay. My dad is in something. I’ll call and tell you what’s going on as soon as I can.
Gahhhh. I didn’t want to lie to her. She was a friend and a good friend, but I couldn’t get Ashton’s words out of my head. “I am trying to keep you off the radar of my best friend and MissMontell ... the sooner we find out who killed ... the sooner all of this can be put to an end.”
My phone was going crazy, so I silenced it and stuffed it in my pocket as I finished in the bathroom. It kept buzzing, but I ignored it. I’d have to turn it off and was just pulling it out to do that when I moved the garbage bin aside and left the bathroom.
Two steps out, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up.
It was silent. No voices. No scuff sounds from sneakers on the linoleum. No register ringing up customers. No bell over the door as people would come in and out. Total and complete silence.
I looked up and froze.
Three customers were huddled by the freezer section while Ashton and his driver had their guns up, aiming at two other men who were just inside the entry door.
Those guys were in jeans and bomber jackets, and they looked like middle-aged men.
Dark features. Greasy hair. They weren’t slim, but they looked almost solid muscle except for a bit of a paunch in their stomachs.
Both were white, their skin was almost puffy and blotchy.
One looked flushed. The other had tanned way too much.
They had their guns up, but were more relaxed in their stance, or looking like it.
One was saying, “... you wanna come into our territory, you gotta call ahead. Pay the toll. You think you can use our toilets without getting our permission? I don’t think so. Times have changed.”
Every single hair on my body was standing up—not because of the guns or what that guy just said but because of Ashton.
A whole different look came over Ashton, like instead of a snake shedding their skin, I was seeing him pull his skin on for the first time.
His eyes went into the glittering look that was dark and ominous, and I knew, without a doubt, that these men were going to die.
Ashton would be the one to kill them, and it would probably happen in two seconds.
But those guys, they didn’t know that. Their whole demeanor was off, too confident and smarmy.
“You work for Worthing?” Ashton’s tone was low and cold. Deadly.
Another chill went through my entire body. Head to toes. I fought against letting it slither up and down my spine, like a snake.
Suddenly, I was pulled back against someone’s chest. Something metal and cold being pressed against my head. “Put your guns dow—”
Whoever spoke, he didn’t finish.
As soon as he started, Ashton turned my way. It happened in slow motion.
My heart paused.
Our eyes locked, and I knew, I knew what I needed to do.
Decision made, and he knew , somehow he just knew what I was planning, and then I did it. I let my body drop to the ground.
Bang!
And then,
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Pop, pop, pop!
Smoke filled the room, along with other smells that I’d never forget, of bodies sweating, defecating, blood, tears, piss.
Thud.
Thud.
Thud.
People were screaming.
Someone was shouting, and then hands touched my shoulders and I flung my arm up, intending to fight at whoever was going to try to take me.
It was Ashton. His eyes looked feral.
I gasped on a sob, but I couldn’t move. Ashton swept me up, an arm under my legs and another behind my back, and he turned. He was looking around, saying something over my head, but I couldn’t make it out. My ears were ringing.
My eyes were stinging, too, and I was blinking back tears, because oh my god, they were hurting.
His arm shifted, pulling me tighter against him. A hand went to the side of my face, and the pain sliced through me. I bucked in his arms, but he held on tight, and then we were moving.
There was a car, a door opened, and we were inside.
Ashton went with me, so I was sitting in his lap, but I couldn’t let go. I’d wrapped my arms around him. I was clinging to him, and he kept me firmly in his arms. The door was shut behind us; then we were speeding off.
I had no idea what was going on.
Terror.
My body was cold.
Everything was spinning around me so fast. I choked out a sob. A hand began smoothing down the side of my head, pulling me to rest against Ashton’s neck.
I burrowed into him so hard that if I cut into him, I didn’t care. I would’ve climbed all the way in as long as he was holding me.
A phone was ringing. I could hear it distantly. The murmur of voices.
I saw the light. Ashton was speaking on his phone, his other arm anchoring me to him.
I tried to look to see who was driving, if it was the same driver or not, if he made it out, but it wasn’t. A different guy. Ashton had so many guys.
Then I felt the chest behind me. The gun next to my head—the words being spoken and Ashton. He looked. I looked. I knew what to do.
I started shaking again.
Ashton shifted me so I was completely in his lap. My side against his front. My feet were tucked over him, resting on the seat to his side, and he had one arm behind my back, holding me steady. He went back to smoothing down my hair, but he was still talking on the phone.
The phone—I don’t know why I did what I did. It didn’t make sense and wouldn’t make sense to me later, but I reached up. I took his phone from him, and I hit the “End” button. The phone went dead. It lit up again, but I looked up, meeting Ashton’s gaze, and he took it from me.
He spoke over me, pulling my head back to his chest, and he put his phone away.
His other arm came around me, and I felt him rest his cheek on the top of my head.
This. This was the only way to leave or go or whatever we were doing, but whatever we were doing, it was the only way to do it after a shooting.
Just. Like. This.
I decided that was the best time to check out.