25. Chapter 25
My eyes sting with tears, but instead of letting them fall, I resort to cursing out Augustine, then his mother, and then his mother’s mother.
I hate the way he ignites a chaotic storm in my pulse whenever he’s near, or how he haunts my every waking thought.
How he wanders into my dreams and plants kisses on my lips, the kinds of kisses that feel infused with drugs and stardust. But most of all… I hate the way he always leaves.
What else is he supposed to do?
Stay? Comfort me? Wrap me in his arms forever?
Fall in love?
Stupid games win you stupid prizes, Shay.
The only way this ends is with him being banished to Purgatory.
Or your friends’ heads on the queen’s pike.
“FUCK.”
I kick my foot against the closet door, and then I crumple into a ball of whiny curse words.
Which is how I quickly learn that revealing one’s greatest secret is a lot harder to do when one doesn’t even know what that secret is.
“I want to leave this realm forever,” I say to the statue, sniffling between breaths, but nothing happens.
“I fucking hate everything here, especially that devil they call the Dreamwalker. He is an absolute menace.”
The statue stares at me blankly. I scoot toward it, ignoring the way my toe is throbbing in my boot.
“I want to find my sister who lives across a sea of sweeping stars. Will you help me?” More silent staring, courtesy of the statue, which leads me to wonder whether this is all just a rouse.
The statue is probably just a hunk of carved marble, and my sister is nothing but a figment of my imagination. Eric was right. She isn’t even rea—
“Did you really think it would be so easy?” Solara asks, her voice sweeping through the room like a goddamned hurricane and blasting my next thoughts to bits.
Wonderful timing, Sister.
“Where the hell have you been?” I spin on her, recalling how she’d deserted me on that bridge.
Solara’s face falls flat. “I wanted to stay, you have to believe me…”
“And yet?”
“And yet…” She exhales melodramatically.
“My magic dried up like the antithesis of a tidal wave. You wouldn’t believe how badly it hurts, being torn through space and time like that.
I even have a bruise on my leg to prove it.
See?” She pulls back the curtain of her gown—which sparkles like a pane of icicle-laden fabric—to reveal an apricot-sized bruise pooling beneath her porcelain skin.
“That looks like it stings,” I note as a spew of angry steam departs from my lips, fizzling into something a lot less angry.
“Yeah, well…” Solara drifts off, her eyes widening like a dove. “I suppose that’s what I get for trying to fight off a magical riptide that was dead set on dragging my soul home.” She works her nimble fingers through her dark hair and begins braiding.
Home. Right. Across a sea of sweeping stars.
“Did you see what happened on the bridge?” I inquire, not sure exactly what I’m expecting her to say, but hoping for clarity nonetheless—considering how people aren’t supposed to magically turn to ash.
“I don’t know what you mean.” She shrugs.
Braid. Braid. Braid.
I drop my voice down a notch. “One moment, I was moving to attack a gang of thieves, and the next—”
“I turned them all to dust.” Solara sighs thoughtfully, dropping her hands at her waist, her beautiful braids falling loosely down her back like undulating waves. “And then you passed out from the shock of it all. Does that answer your question?”
“You… did… what?” I gasp.
Sure, I’d been thinking it. But for some reason, I hadn’t been expecting for her to actually admit it.
Solara doesn’t give me a moment to bask in my horror, however.
Instead, she quickly reaches for my shaky hands and says, “Let’s get back to what’s important.
You must reveal your deepest, darkest, and most formidable secret in order to free the Mother of Chaos.
And then we can finally be together again. You’re so close.”
“Right,” I say, my breaths coming out shaky.
“Erm… well… Eric broke my heart. He completely shattered me.” I stare at the statue and try to pretend that I’m not completely reeling from Solara’s murderous admission.
I don’t even realize that I’m holding my breath until a wave of dizziness begins to overtake me.
“Truthfully, I would’ve married him if I’d had the chance.
” I gasp, gulping up air. But nothing happens.
The statue doesn’t budge. So I try again.
“I used to steal money from the wardens to purchase dewdrop candies at the market. Those tiny little sugar bombs were like crack on my tongue.” I chomp down on my bottom lip, expecting this one to do the trick, but it doesn’t.
“I feel resentful over the fact that my parents abandoned me when I was a baby. Who hand-delivers their infant to someone like Master Grimwell anyway?” The statue only stills.
So I take a new approach, averting my gaze toward my sister instead.
“Sometimes I fear that you’re dead, and that I’m talking to a ghost in your stead.
” A tear catapults down my cheek, but the only thing that moves is me as I collapse into the icy hug that my sister is offering.
“I don’t know what my deepest secret is,” I whimper into her shoulder, which feels like a frozen tundra against my skin.
“Keep trying,” she urges, her lips pressing against the crown of my head. “You mustn’t give up.”
I clench and unclench my fists, then I whirl toward the statue as though I’m gearing up to take a swing at it.
“I have no magic. Does that make you happy? Everyone else was kissed by the power of the old gods, but their magic skipped over me. I have nothing aside from a desperate desire to leave this galaxy. Will you please help me?” Time passes by slowly, each heartbeat slogging on like a broken chime as I wait for the Mother of Chaos to appear before me.
To cast aside her stone form and morph into the body of a beautiful, atmosphere-defying goddess.
But the longer I wait, the more I realize she’s not coming.
“Shadow?” A familiar voice interrupts my state of mourning as a head of blonde-purple hair peeks in through the doorway, followed by a blob of blue hair, and then a sea of dark tresses.
“Yes?” I mutter to my friends through a puddle of snot and tears, the sight of them making my heart wilt in relief.
“We thought you escaped.” Bella crouches down to examine me, swiping a strand of hair away from my face. “What are you doing in here?”
“She came back to exorcise demons, obviously,” Maxine says, flicking Lily in the forehead. “And as it just so happens, I’ve got one for you right here.”
Lily smacks her hand away.
I pull myself to an aching stand, only to realize that my limbs suddenly feel bogged down and heavy. “What time is it?” I ask, rubbing my bleary, tear-filled eyes.
“Midnight,” Bella says with a sigh. “Which means we officially have four days remaining until the clock runs out on the Curse of Love.”
“We were so close to freedom that I could taste it,” Maxine chimes in. “And yet somehow, we’ve found ourselves back in the castle. So much for our getaway plan.”
“Perhaps you should’ve ran faster,” Lily says with a returning forehead flick.
“What happened to you back in the forest, Shay?” Bella asks, looking at me with wide eyes.
It takes me a moment to realize she’s talking to me.
“Oh…” I drift off, as I silently recall Trisda’s hut and how the dragon king had offered to whisk me away to his realm.
Or how Augustine had made my heart flip-flop around in my chest so hard, that I’m still in a tizzy over it.
But I only manage to blow out a breath and say, “Nothing.”
Bella gives me a look that indicates she doesn’t believe me.
“That’s too bad,” Lily sighs. “We thought you’d escaped.
In fact, we were coming up here to celebrate.
” She reveals a bottle of bubbly liquor from behind her back and holds it out to me.
“We didn’t bring glasses. Yes, I know. We’re simply fiends.
You see, we were planning on chugging it straight from the bottle. ”
Maxine rips the bottle out of her hands. Lily whisks it back.
“Wait,” I say, holding up a hand. “The three of you came all the way up here to get drunk and stargaze in my honor?” I ask. They stop fighting and stare at me.
“Partially,” Lily shrugs.
“What do you mean, partially?”
“We mostly came up here to hide from the gods,” Maxine winces. “They’re holding a war council, and they’ve requested our attendance.”
“War council?” I bristle in disbelief. “At midnight? You can’t be serious.”
“Oh, she is being quite serious,” Bella sighs ruefully. “You should’ve seen Regent.”
Maxine snorts at this. “He was practically swatting at our hides in an effort to hurry us along. He wanted to escort us to the council meeting himself, but we told him to screw off.”
“Well, actually,” Lily clarifies, “we told him that we needed to use the ladies’ room, and that we’d be right back. It was a coincidence that a trap door appeared in the wall.”
“I imagine Regent is still standing in the corridor for us to return,” Maxine snickers.
“And where did you find the champagne?” I ask, suddenly intrigued.
“In the servant corridor on the way up here." Lily beams, looking proud of herself. “It was sitting on a marble counter, as if it’d materialized just for the occasion. Speaking of marble, what is that thing doing up here, by the way?” She points vaguely behind me at the statue, her brows lifting.
I swing my gaze back to the statue like a heavy-weighted pendulum, its presence shattering my heart along with my resolve.
It’s then I realize my only plan of escape has been whittled down to mere fragments of my imagination, entirely unsalvageable.
I don’t have a secret to give to the statue. My secrets are all dried up.
“No reason,” I whisper. “No reason at all.”