Chapter 5 #2
Thor smiled at him and held out a hand to him. He took it and laughed. “We’re both sticky.”
“We are.” Thor took him to the sink and turned it on, stood behind him and washed their hands together. A little soap, a little rubbing, then running their hands under the water. “That’s better.”
“Uh-huh.” He was hard and breathless, just from that. Oh, he had it bad.
Thor turned him and brought their mouths together, hands sliding down to grab his ass and tug him close. Okay maybe he wasn’t the only one because Thor was definitely getting hard against him.
“You’re coming upstairs?” It wasn’t really a question, but Auggie knew if he said no, Thor wouldn’t press him because Thor was a good guy.
He nodded. “I am.”
Thor grabbed his ass and pulled him up, and Auggie instinctively wrapped his legs around Thor’s waist as soon as his feet left the ground.
“Good boy,” Thor murmured, and the praise felt like a caress.
He got flustered at that and, out of instinct, pressed his lips to Thor’s. The kiss was electric, like the others had been, and all-consuming. He barely realized they were moving, he was so focused on the kisses.
He never once worried about falling or being dropped. That would never happen while Thor held him. He knew it, deep inside.
Thor carried him up the stairs, pressing him against a wall once they were in the hall and deepened the kiss, rubbing against him.
“I want you,” Thor told him.
“Yes! Yes!” It was what he wanted to. So badly.
“I want to be inside you.”
“Please!” He whimpered and rubbed against Thor. He wanted that too. He never had, but he knew he wanted it with Thor. He wanted to feel Thor opening him up and filling him, taking him.
Thor carried him the rest of the way to the bedroom and laid him on the mattress. It smelled like Thor and that relaxed him immediately.
Thor turned on the bedside light, and it was soft and lit them enough he could see Thor, but not so much it was super bright or intrusive. It made the space cozy.
Thor gazed down at him. “You’re beautiful.”
He wriggled a little but didn’t contradict Thor this time. The way Thor looked at him, made him feel like he just might be beautiful.
Bending to him, Thor kissed him again, and Auggie opened up, letting Thor in. He wrapped his arms around Thor’s neck and lost himself in the sensations.
He felt Thor’s hands at his waist, tugging his shirt out of his jeans and stroking the flesh around his waistband. Arching, he pushed into those touches, encouraging them, wanting more.
Moaning, Thor pushed his shirt higher, and Auggie cried out into Thor’s mouth as the warm fingers brushed his nipples. His cock was hard inside his jeans, pushing at his zipper.
He let go of his hold on Thor so he could return the favor, his hands shaking as he pulled at Thor’s shirt.
The man’s belly was all warm skin and hard muscle, and his fingers slid along the dips and hills, counting each ab.
It made him whimper, and he pushed Thor’s shirt up higher, exploring happily.
Groaning, Thor pulled back slightly and worked his own shirt up and off. Auggie gasped. He’d known Thor was good-looking, but his body was stunning.
“God, you’re hot.”
“Thank you. I think you’re pretty hot too.”
“Oh, please.” Auggie shook his head. “Take my shirt off and see that’s not true.”
“Didn’t I tell you not to say stuff like that about yourself.” Thor helped him get his shirt off and began stroking his chest, his nipples, his belly. “You’re perfect just as you are.”
“I don’t have muscles like you.”
“So? What does that have to do with it? There’s no one definition of beauty, Auggie. I look at you and I like what I see. What I see turns me on.” Thor grabbed his hand and brought it to his crotch.
Auggie couldn’t deny that Thor was hard again, even through the thick material of Thor’s pants he could feel that.
“No more saying negative things about yourself.” Thor said the words quite firmly.
“What if I do?”
“Then I’ll have to punish you.”
He snorted. “Like what? Putting me over your knee and spanking me?”
“If that’s what works for us, then yes.”
“Wait, what?” Auggie wriggled. That should not have turned him on, but it did.
“We can discuss details later. I mean we can discuss them now if you want, but we’re both turned on and…” Thor shook his head and sat back. “No, let’s talk about it now. I don’t want you to ever feel like I’m using sex to circumvent talking about things.”
Sitting up against the headboard, Thor tugged him into the lee of his legs.
Auggie put his legs over one of Thor’s thighs and leaned against the solid body as Thor held him.
Cradled him. It felt incredibly good, and it felt like a place where he could have a conversation that involved crazy stuff like spankings and punishments and sex. Which was crazy. Right?
“I’ve never known anyone like you,” Auggie told Thor.
“There isn’t anyone like me. And no one like you, either. We’re all unique and we’re all valid. And I feel incredibly grateful that I met you.”
He shook his head. It was hard to believe. Thor arched an eyebrow at him.
“I’m not trying to be mean to myself. But nobody’s ever said nice stuff like that to me before.”
“And that’s a shame, but it doesn’t make my saying it—my believing it—to be any less true,” Thor insisted.
“And every time you deny it, you make it harder to accept it as the truth. So if my asking you not to be mean to yourself doesn’t work, I figure consequences just might.
And spanking is a consequence. But there’s others, like time-outs, orgasm denial, just to name a few. ”
Auggie found himself wiggling, not because it upset him. Just the opposite in fact. “Should we be talking about this?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know why I think it’s okay, but I think maybe it is.”
“I think it’s because you’re my boy and I’m your Daddy.”
Auggie snorted. “You are nothing like my father.” His father had not been a nice man or an even a halfway decent parent.
“Not father—Daddy. There’s a difference.”
He tilted his head and looked up, meeting Thor’s eyes. They were kind and serious and caring.
“Have you heard of BDSM?” Thor asked.
Auggie nodded. He wasn’t above finding some porn to read or watch on the internet on lonely nights when just his hand and his thoughts didn’t seem like enough.
“Well, this is like that, in a way. Some men are meant to look after their lovers, to care for them, to make their lives easier. To guide them and love and adore them. To take the weight of the world off their partners. I’m like that.”
“And I’m the kind of man who wants to be taken care of?” That made him sound like a user and what did Thor get out of it?
“No, you’re the kind of man who has had a hard life and who has a hard time finding peace and ease.
A hard time finding the joy in life. I just want to give you a safe place to explore and find that joy.
I want to be a part of that joy and exploration.
Not a father figure—a partner who you trust to make decisions for you.
Who you trust to take care of you so that you can be your best self. ”
Auggie thought over the words, trying to sort this out. “Do you think I can’t be a good person on my own?”
“I didn’t say good person. I said your best self. Where you don’t talk yourself out of thinking you’re sexy and good and necessary to the person who cares for you.”
“That kind of thing is hard for me to believe,” he admitted. He knew that little voice at the back of his head could be loud and even when it wasn’t shouting, it was hard to ignore.
“I want to be your Daddy, the man who builds you up.”
“By spanking me?”
“Well, first of all, I think you kind of like the idea of me spanking you.”
Auggie blushed. He didn’t know why because it wasn’t something he’d ever fantasized about, but every time Thor mentioned spanking, it made him hot.
“And second of all, like I said, it doesn’t have to be spanking. And maybe I’m putting the cart before the horse, but we’ve spent dinners together once a week for nearly three months and I’m falling for you. I think you’re my boy.”
Auggie stared up at Thor, hardly able to believe what he was hearing.
He’d spent the last three months convincing himself that Thor was just being nice.
That there was no way Thor felt about him what he was feeling about Thor.
And now it seemed that Thor was just handing him this beautiful life with someone hot and sexy who made him feel safe and cared for.
It was too good to be true. Right?
Thor shook his head. “Don’t do that.”
“What did I do?” he hadn’t said any of that out loud, had he?
“I could see it in your face the minute your inner saboteur started talking you out of reaching for what you want.”
Oh. He felt tears prickle at his eyes. Thor had seen it in his face. Just like that. The minute it had happened. Thor had seen it and was responding, wasn’t ignoring him.
Thor wrapped him in a tight hug. “It’s okay. I’ve got you. And I’m not going anywhere.”
“Even if I can’t be better?”
“You don’t need to be better. I’m just trying to help you believe in yourself. And yes, I still want to be with you and care for you and love you even if you never truly believe in yourself. I will believe for both of us.”
He did cry, then. Harsh, body-wracking tears. And he clung to Thor.
Thor didn’t kick him out or get angry or tell him to stop being a baby. Thor just held him safely in the strong arms.