Chapter 3 #2
Axel was already there with his hands tucked into his coat pockets and his breath billowing into the cold air when I arrived. Slowly, he turned to face me, clearly having heard my boots crunching on the frosted grass.
“Hey, Coop.”
Axel was around an inch taller than me, but he appeared as though he was trying to make himself smaller, like he was scared of me or something, and that thought made my stomach turn.
Instead of replying immediately, I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly. “Hey, Ax.”
“Do you hate me?” he mumbled into my shoulder.
I chuckled and let go. “No, I don’t hate you.” I sighed. “You’re both grown adults who can make your own decisions. Just… you know there’s no halfway with Dyl, right? Like you’re either all in with him or nothing. I’m pretty sure he’s waited his whole life for you, and that’s a lot of pressure.”
“It’s freezing. Can we walk and talk?” he asked, so we began a slow stroll around the pond.
Axel exhaled before answering my question. “I know about Dyl. I know this isn’t… new for him. I want to… do this right, I promise. I’m, erm, taking him on a date tonight, actually. Like a proper date.”
I blew out a big breath and groaned. “I feel like I have no clue what I’m supposed to say. Because if it were any other omega, I’d be like ‘Hey, go get you some,’ but that’s my brother… so most of me wants to say ‘have him home by eleven.’”
“Yeah. It’s super fucking awkward. I’m sorry.”
“You think it’ll get less awkward eventually?” I asked.
“Yeah. I think so. I mean, I fucking hope so. It’s all new right now. It won’t feel weird forever… Might just take a little time?”
I exhaled, and my breath billowed out like smoke into the frosted air. A dog barked in the distance, disturbing the stillness of the morning.
“So… when did this start?” I asked, mostly because it seemed like the right thing to say.
Axel scrubbed a hand over his face. “I don’t know exactly. But as he rather aggressively pointed out to me recently, I was never exactly normal about him even when we were younger.”
How had I missed this? Now that he pointed it out, there had definitely been moments when we’d been younger when I’d thought “I’m supposed to be the protective older brother and even I don’t think I need to get involved” but Axel would.
I’d thought it was kind of sweet that he’d been so protective of my brother, like it was a sign of us being more like brothers than friends. Finding out the truth was bittersweet.
“You really hated Adam for, like, no fucking reason.” I snorted a laugh.
We’d once been at our friend Lei’s house party and found Dylan kissing Adam.
Axel had gone apeshit, and afterwards, Dylan and Adam had ended up best friends.
I’d liked Adam, but Axel had acted like we’d begun inviting a vampire into our home and had always made comments about him “seeming shifty” and making comments like “What’s he doing here again?
” as though it was completely unreasonable for Dylan to have his friend stay for dinner.
“I hated him so much. Dylan still claims they really were just friends that whole time,” he said, kicking a rock on the ground.
“I know.” I smiled.
“How come you didn’t tell me?”
I shrugged. “You really want me to answer that?”
“Probably not. Tell me anyway,” he said.
I swivelled to face him and arched an eyebrow. “Lauren Bell.”
Axel winced. She’d been Axel’s girlfriend for several years, they’d got together while we were still in high school, and since me and Axel had been joined at the hip, the three of us had spent a tonne of time together.
I’d been a little gutted when they’d broken up because she’d stopped being my friend in the process.
“I’m such a dick,” he lamented.
“Only a little bit. Dylan will certainly keep you in line.”
Axel smiled in a way that disturbed me. This was why nobody you knew this well should date your brother—you could tell when they were thinking about him naked.
Someone bleach my brain.
So, they were together, then. If I was being honest with myself, I was gutted.
I had a handful of casual friends, but Axel was my person.
My eyes burned a little when I realised he’d be Dylan’s person now instead.
It wasn’t fair to make that Axel’s problem, though, so I forced my face into a smile and changed the subject.
“Did you catch the Vipers game last night?”
“Yeah, Milly put it on in the pub while we were working. I’m pretty sure she’d cut her own tongue out before she’d admit she was proud of her sister, but she never misses a game.” Axel snorted.
Axel’s cousin, Pippa, played for one of the national rugby teams, the Vixen Vipers, and they’d been killing it all season.
“You showing the game next weekend?” I asked.
“Yeah, we will be. You coming by?”
“Cool, yeah. I’m on call that weekend, so I’ll only be on Sprite, but it’ll help pass the time.”
I wasn’t a heavy drinker in general, but ever since Axel had taken over his grandparents’ pub, I’d spent a few evenings a week there. It had become a bit of a second home.
Even with Axel and Dylan dating each other taking up more of his time, at least I’d still see my best friend there.
He’d be working, but it would be something.
It was pretty depressing to realise that, other than Axel, I didn’t really have any close friends.
It’s hard to let people in when you’re hiding such a big part of yourself.
I rubbed at my chest, feeling it tighten like someone was wrapping rubber bands around it.
I’m super fucking lonely, and I don’t know what to do about it.