Chapter 36 Helena
I awoke just before sunrise to find Grim gone. Rather, he wasn’t with me.
After lying in bed for nearly a half hour while I waited for my entire being to reboot and enter recovery mode, I half fumbled, half fell off the mattress. From there, wrapped in a sheet, I went looking for him in case he had stuck around. Grim…
I found a note instead, which he’d scrawled onto my sunflower notepad in pink ink since that was the only color pen immediately available.
Called to a Fated.
G
After peeling the note free, I stood in my dining room/kitchen staring at the paper as though, if I waited long enough, more words would appear. Some kind of clue about when he’d be back, or even a winky face or a naughty promise—something, anything, to go on until I did see him again.
I hated having to fight the needling fear, too—the new fear—that this note carried a lie.
He’d already revealed how the Fated were rare. Relatively rare…
So maybe he’d just scratched out a convenient excuse.
Because maybe he hadn’t wanted to be here when I woke up, and maybe he didn’t want to come back, either.
In other words, maybe he was having regrets?
I wasn’t. And never would…
While a warm shower helped me ease back into my body—maybe even literally—the soap and water did nothing to clean the lingering dirty thoughts from my mind.
What it would be like to take a shower with him…
What other parts of my apartment—or his—we could… enjoy.
Different ways I could… retaliate.
I supposed the silver lining of possibly not being long for this world (if there was one) was that I wasn’t going to have to worry about my love life or how no future bedroom interludes were ever going to live up to that experience.
The man had given my soul an orgasm, one layered over the O he’d delivered to my body.
With the help of ethereal tendrils.
“I’m ruined,” I murmured to myself, my voice echoing slightly in the cramped shower as the water rushed over me, swirling citrus shower gel and the remnants of all hope that I wouldn’t fall for this forbidden being—that I hadn’t already—down the drain.
“I’m ruined, and all I want… is for him to do it to me again. ”
And always.