45
45
A TRAIL OF BLOOD AND brOKEN HEARTS
ADRIANA
“I swear I didn’t know, baby.” Enzo holds onto my fingers as if they’re about to be ripped away from him. “I didn’t lie to you. I didn’t know this was going to happen. Or even possible.”
His eyes light with concern and he stares at me, terrified I’m slipping from his grasp.
“I…”
“Adriana, please. I’ve done too many despicable things to count, but I would not do that to you.”
The demon standing before me is going out of his fucking mind, and I can’t handle both of our emotions. Not right now. Not when my fucking pregnancy’s been announced to the whole damn world.
Nothing about this is straightforward, and the past few days haven’t helped me come to terms with this. I’d guessed after the second day of vomiting and it was so damn obvious I didn’t need to take a pregnancy test. I’d wanted time to figure things out, but on this occasion there wasn’t enough of it.
“You shouldn’t have found out like that,” Enzo says, moving closer. “I don’t care if he’s the fucking Great One. I’ll make sure Lucifer pays for this, Adi. He didn’t need to take this from you.”
“He didn’t,” I mumble.
Enzo stops and stares, blinking far too rapidly to be calm.
“I’ve known for a few days.”
Those deep black eyes widen and starlight bursts through them.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” His voice is quiet and has the calm of someone who’s murderous.
“Because I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I didn’t think a few days would matter and I thought I deserved some time to get my head around it.”
He nods and very deliberately kneels. “Do you want this?”
I genuinely don’t know.
I’m too young. Far too young. But time doesn’t matter as much when you’re going to live for an eternity. There’s enough of it to do everything I ever wanted and all the things I never thought possible. I doubt a baby changes that.
Months ago, I definitely didn’t want this. I’d have done anything to prevent this. Anything to reverse this.
Now, I simply don’t know.
Enzo waits and watches and suddenly there isn’t any more time left. I stare at the black walls and I still can’t find the answer to his question. There’s too much to unpick. Too much I don’t know and far too much left unsaid.
“Do you?” I ask.
He stills. His eyes don’t. They’re full of turmoil and he doesn’t know what to do. It’s alarming. Frankly, almost terrifying. Of all the things I’ve endured, seeing Enzo torn between protecting me and doing what he wants is the single most horrifying experience of them all.
“I swear I did not know this was possible, Adriana. I did not plan this.” He kneels again and for a second time, he makes my heart skip a beat. “I couldn’t be… happier?” He tilts his head and watches me. “I think that is the emotion. It is unfamiliar and disgustingly nice. Warm. Soft. Sickening really. The thought of you growing my child inside you makes me want to bathe the planes of Hell in blood in your name and christen the hallowed halls of every fucking temple with the souls of the damned.”
I doubt Enzo could have conjured a more demonic declaration of happiness than the one he’s just given me. It’s perfect. For him. There’s almost nothing soft about him and very little that’s good.
“The thought of it running around after you’ve pushed it out of that perfect pussy of yours makes me feel even warmer.” He grins and I have to cover my mouth to stop laughing. “I cannot wait to meet the little fucker. I’m going to teach him to fight and kill with ruthless efficiency. He’ll be the strongest demon Hell’s ever known.”
It's too much and I can’t conceal my amusement anymore. “He won’t be a demon. He’s half angel. And he might be a she.”
Enzo nods and his chest expands, somehow puffing up even more.
“Then she will be as beautiful as her mother and even more vicious. She’ll leave a trail of blood and broken hearts in her wake. What more could I ask for, Adriana?”
His hand reaches forward and hovers above my stomach. Enzo glances up and waits until he’s certain—absolutely certain—I’m ready before gently resting it on my belly.
“They’re strong,” he whispers. “Perfect. Like their mother.”
“What if they’re more like me than you?”
His head tips to one side, and then he smiles. “If they’re good?” I nod. “Then I will be forced to endure some fucking awful family get-togethers. Your father is an insufferable asshole, and two of them might be more than even I can endure.”
Enzo leans in and kisses me. Gently. So gently I almost miss the touch of his lips on mine.
“I want you pregnant more often, Adriana. All the fucking time. I want to fill you with my come until it leaks out of you and that perfect cunt of yours has no choice but to get pregnant.”
I shake my head.
His eyebrow rises.
“Our deal still stands, baby. You’re mine. Mine to use. Mine to fuck. Mine to adore and please. Mine to breed.”
I shake my head. “I’m not ready, Enzo.”
The demon nods and drops his head, kissing my stomach as he worships it. He presses his forehead against it and my hand sinks to his head, holding him against me as I stroke the horns that ought to terrify me.
“I know, baby. I know.”
I sigh.
“This baby is unexpected. All of this is unexpected—and we have all the time in the world.”
I nod and exhale, relieved he finally understands.
“There’s enough time for me to breed an entire swarm of Nephilim. We’ll have an entire army of them, baby. When you’re ready.”
He lifts his head and looks up at me.
“They’ll fight and squabble, and we might lose one or two along the way, but we can always have more. It will be so fucking glorious and the carnage will be magnificent. They’ll raise Hell and even Heaven and I could not be happier. Truly.”
I sigh, and he grabs my hands.
“When and if you are ready, Adi. Your perfect little body will need to recover after the exertion of growing my child. We have all the time in the world. To do whatever we want. Whatever we decide—and on this matter, and only this matter—I am prepared to allow you a choice. This is your body, your decision, baby. After this one.”
I nod and we’re back here again. Back to talking about my feelings now Enzo’s made his clear—and I still don’t know what I want. Except him. I want him—for all his hardness and his depravity. For all the viciousness and the violence.
“I don’t know if I can do this, Enzo.”
My heart shudders and I immediately know I can. I’ve survived everything Enzo put me through and I made it through whatever the fuck happened in the temple. I’ve more than survived. I’ve flourished. And the thought of doing anything else isn’t something my heart’s prepared to entertain. It won’t accept a reality without this child—without Enzo’s child—and it’s decided my head’s going to have to get on board.
“I’ve never met anyone quite like you, not in all my days and nights. You’re remarkable, Adriana. You’re special, and not just because you’re an Altair. You’re strong, resilient as fuck, and only a fool or a madman would be idiotic enough to get in your way. You’re brave enough to stand up to Lucifer and you’re going to be a great mother. A perfect mother.”
My lips twitch and he smiles.
“This is still a shock. For both of us. I’m prepared to accept things for what they are, whereas you insist on railing against them, Adriana.” Enzo kisses my stomach again and lingers. “Sometimes the fight is what keeps us going, and sometimes it is better to accept the things we cannot change. This is a gift, baby. A miracle.”
“I’m not ready,” I mumble.
“I know,” he replies.
He draws a deep breath and pulls me against him. His strong arms wrap around me and hold me against his chest. The vicious, violent wings that used to terrify me wrap around me and I close my eyes, safe and protected.
“Are you disappointed?”
“No,” he replies.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
His fingers stroke my face, and I lean into them.
“You have a little under nine months. That’s time enough for you to figure out how you feel about this and everything else that’s happened.”
“What do you want to do now?” I mumble.
“It doesn’t matter what I want, baby. This is about you. What is it you want, Adriana?”
My head’s a mess, and nothing makes sense anymore. Least of this. I’m still grappling with who and what I am. With what happened in the temple. With what I did in the temple.
I’m not ready.
“I want time.”
I don’t even know who I’m talking to anymore. I’m telling myself what I want as much as I’m talking to Enzo.
“I’m not sure what I want. It’s too fucking hard to figure it out and I just want to be left alone.” I swallow, staring at the wounded expression on Enzo’s face. “By everyone except you. I’ve had as much of this as I can take and I can’t think straight. I’ve been trying to work out how I feel about being pregnant for the past three days and I’m going round in circles.”
We stare at each other and meet. Unequal. Far from even. But together. In balance.
“You’ve been through Hell, Adi.”
Enzo kisses me and it’s a world of heat and fire that catches me by surprise. He’s rough again, dominant. His tongue demands I give him what he needs, and I moan into his mouth, letting his excitement wash over me. I feel it too. I want it. But I want something else and I break our kiss, determined to tell him.
“I want to go home, Enzo.” I look down at my hands and wonder why they seem so small. “I don’t like it here. I can’t think… I can’t sleep… I can’t breathe…”
“We’ll leave.”
Enzo gets up and marches to the doorway, throwing the heavy doors open like they’re weightless, and yelling for Byron. The glass in the room reverberates as he roars again and I curl my legs up underneath me.
Enzo’s heard me and now he’s going to make damn sure I get what I want. What I’ve asked for and not just because that’s the deal we made. He wants me to have everything I want, for no reason other than I want it and it makes me happy and he’ll tear down anyone and anything that gets in his way.
It's romantic. As romantic as a demon cursing his way through Hell can be.
“Where the fuck have you been?”
The door slams in Byron’s face, and he’s forced to open it himself. He seems to struggle with it and Enzo growls, irritated that this is taking longer than necessary.
He’s forgetting this is a mess of his own fucking making.
“I was taking care of…”
“I don’t give a shit,” Enzo snaps. “We’re leaving. Adriana needs fresh air and a change of scenery. Sunlight, gardens, flowers, and those fucking boats she likes watching sail down the river. I assume everything is ready?”
Byron pales, and it clearly isn’t.
“For fuck’s sake, Byron. What the fuck have you been up to?”
“Sorting your shit out,” he says, snarling at Enzo in a tone as vicious as any I’ve heard in the past week. “Morgana’s pissed that half her coven was wiped out and her next three books are going to be bestsellers. Elgios is already claiming credit for saving the fucking day, and I had to set a few things straight. Half the fucking demons left in Hell needed paying from your vaults, and I haven’t even mentioned the fucking chaos breaking out in London.”
Enzo crosses his arms and shakes his head.
“Sorry about the books, Adriana,” Byron says, sheepishly. “I talked her down from five and made her promise they’d be good.” He turns to face Enzo again. “Keeping up with you takes more than one demon. You need to replace Eva.”
“Then find a fucking replacement.” Enzo pauses. “Get someone for Adriana too.”
“I don’t need…”
The searing look stops me in my tracks.
“Baby, you do.” His expression softens. “You’re going to have your hands full.”
Byron lets his eyes fall to my stomach. He couldn’t be less subtle if he fucking tried. It’s far too early for me to show any signs of pregnancy, but Byron’s still looking. Damn hard too. Enough to make me shift uncomfortably.
“What the fuck are you staring at?”
“It’s true then,” Byron says. “The rumor’s true. A Nephilim, Amaymon. A fucking Nephilim .”
Enzo pulls himself upright and spreads his wings, beating them with pure menace. His eyes brim with aggression and his teeth bare in a blatant display of violence. Enzo’s magnificent like this—deranged, dangerous, and depraved. A monster, but a beautiful one.
“Mine,” he roars, and Hell trembles. “My submissive. My woman. My child.”