Chapter 23
Luci
20 Days Until The Wedding
T his morning I pretended to be asleep on the chair when Alessandro woke up, opening my eyes cautiously when I heard the door click shut. Last night was a mistake. No matter how hard I try, I cannot deny my body’s shameful attraction to him. He was right though, I was dreaming of Elio. I haven’t dreamed about him in years, and normally when I do, it’s about the day he broke up with me. Elio’s reasoning was intensely specific. I vividly remember what he said word for word like it was yesterday.
I snuck out for the second night in a row to see the boy my family doesn’t know about. Last night I gave him a part of my body that I never thought I’d give any man, but it’s important that I save my virginity for my husband. If it’s up to me, Elio will be my husband one day. As always, he meets me down the street at the park. When I climb into his car, sadness and disgust radiate off him, replacing the compassion and love he normally gives me.
I lean in to kiss him and he leans away from me. “Elio, what’s wrong? Kiss me.”
“I can’t. What we did last night, we shouldn’t have done that. You understand that was worse than letting me take your virginity, right?”
My heart races in my chest as tears line the rim of my eyes. “Elio, we talked about this. You told me it would be okay. What are you talking about?”
He turns to me, his expression showing something I’ve never seen from the sweet boy I thought I knew. “What I’m talking about is that you willingly gave me a part of your body. You’re ruined, Luci. You’re a slut. I can’t be with you anymore. We’re done.”
I shake my head, leaning back into the car’s door, speechless by his words. “You don’t mean that.”
“I mean exactly what I said. Consider yourself lucky I even met you here to say this to your face. Now get out of my car.”
I bolt out of his car before he sees the tears falling down my face as I hear his car leaving the park. His words echo in my head. “You’re ruined, Luci. You’re a slut.” Sneaking back into my house is significantly harder because I’m focused on calming the short sobs that escape my chest. That night, I decided never to date another boy again until I wanted to marry someone. They’re not worth the heartbreak.
After a long shower, hot enough to wash away Alessandro’s touch, I knock on the door to get Enzo’s attention. He opens the door and acknowledges my presence with a nod.
“I want to go have breakfast, ideally without Alessandro.” He nods again as he presses his lips together, knowing what I mean as he escorts me downstairs.
We’re about to walk into the kitchen when I hear Alessandro and Geno conversing. I place a hand on Enzo’s chest to stop him, placing my finger on my lips to keep him quiet as I eavesdrop.
“Luci, we shouldn’t listen in on their conversation. I could get into major trouble for letting you do this.”
“You won’t. I’ll tell them you tried to stop me.” He puts his arms up in surrender, ignoring the whole situation.
My attention turns back to what Alessandro and Geno are saying. By the first line, I can tell it’s about Alessandro and me.
“You’re fucking this up, Alessandro. You’re supposed to get her to love you, not despise you. You need to stop thinking with your dick.” Is Alessandro speaking with others about what we do in private?
“I know, Geno. I can’t help how I act around her. She makes me crazy.” I see a shadow of his body pacing around the kitchen.
“Then keep your blood flowing to the right head. She will be your wife and the mother to your children, regardless of how difficult she is at times. Do you think your nonna and I loved each other? No. I was the husband she needed me to be though until the day she died. We cared for each other. That’s what you need to do with Luciana.” I’m not sure if I should thank Geno or be pissed off at his monologue. Maybe both?
I stand out of sight until I hear both of them leave the kitchen. After sneaking in to grab some food I walk around the property, spending most of the day in the garden avoiding Alessandro. There are days when I want to like Alessandro, like the man who had dinner with me in the garden. But when he treats me the way he did last night, the wonderful night we shared in the garden might as well be a dream.
I hide in the bedroom before he’s done for the evening, waiting for the sound of the door unlocking. He doesn’t come to make me sleep in his bed that night, giving me the space I need. I fall asleep that night, deciding I will play nice as long as Alessandro does, hopefully, able to keep my distance until Geno leaves and it’s just the two of us.