Chapter 33
Luci
8 Days Until The Wedding
“ L uci!” I hear El’s arrival before seeing her. “There you are, babe. I have fabulous plans for us tonight. Of course, Alessandro is being a buzzkill and won’t allow us to have any real fun.” I’m convinced El could make anything fun. Regardless, it’s nice to have someone to plan some sort of bachelorette party for me, strippers or no strippers.
Marco and Andrea walk into the hallway with El as I step into the kitchen, trying to decipher what their hushed voices are saying. The three of them stop talking when other footsteps come down the hallway. I walk out of the kitchen, seeing Alessandro as he turns to El.
“Remember our conversation, El?” Alessandro asks her like she would conveniently forget what he told her, and I think she would.
“You said no strippers. You gave me no other guidelines. If you three are going out to who the fuck knows where, I’m going to make this as much fun as I’m allowed to for Luci. She’s my new friend.” El stands up to Alessandro with no hesitation whatsoever. I’ve seen grown men shake in his intimidating presence.
Andrea walks over to her, pulling her close before lowering his voice into a deep tone. “Behave, mon trésor.” I love how Andrea tames her. Everyone deserves that kind of love, the fairytale story every girl dreams of.
“Yeah, tesoro, behave,” Marco mocks Andrea, giving him the same glare that El gives Marco regularly, including right now.
Alessandro reminds Enzo of the rules for tonight before leaving. Right on cue when the door shuts, El turns toward me, giving her signature mischievous smile.
“Alright, babe. While the boys are away, the girls will, well, follow the rules I guess. I swear, I know you have to marry him because of the debt thing blah blah blah, but I’m baffled that you don’t want to murder him in his sleep. And I thought Andrea was obsessive.” She continues her rant about Alessandro as we walk into the kitchen.
“What have you planned, then?”
“We have the classics. Food, wine, movies, girl talk, and extra surprises for later. First, we’ll eat and drink. Andrea is a fabulous cook and has excellent knowledge about food and wine pairings. You sit and I’ll put a little wine tasting together for us.” She slams one of the bags on the counter, pulling out copious amounts of wine, finger foods, a charcuterie board, and a paper with food and wine pairings.
I have no idea what half of these cheeses are, but Andrea knows what he’s doing. We spend a good amount of time chatting and eating and by chatting I mean El talks and I listen and eat.
While I’d never admit this to her, the main reason I’m comfortable in front of El is because we have similar bodies. I know I’ll never get any passive-aggressive comments about what I’m wearing, what I’m eating, or how much I’m eating. Switching my focus to something else, I ask about the items she brought with her.
“What’s in the containers?” My voice is muffled by the mixture of cheese and honey on a cracker that’s currently in my mouth.
“That’s the best part! I was going to wait, but since you pointed it out, let’s get this show on the road. As I was telling Andrea, Alessandro only said no strippers. Nothing about anything else that’s dick-shaped. Am I following the rules? Unlikely. Do I care? Fuck no. So sorpresa!” My eyes widen when she opens the boxes. This would certainly make a priest sweat and a nun faint. Are these toys hers? Do Andrea and El use all of these? I’m dumbfounded by the variety of toys I didn’t know existed until El shoves a penis-shaped cookie into her mouth. Those are a thing too?
“Wow. Is this what’s normally done at a bachelorette party?” If not, I’m worried about what the answer would be.
“You sweet naive, Luci. At the last bachelorette party I went to, we almost got arrested. I mean, you accidentally float a smidge too far out and end up in international waters and suddenly you’re bombarded by the Coast Guard. I was able to turn on some waterworks and get us off with a warning. To answer your questions, penis-shaped things are fairly normal for bachelorette parties. Why? Have you never used any of this? You look like you’ve never seen a sex toy before. Oh shit, have you never diddled? Girl, I know Catholic shame is real, but you cannot tell me as a woman in your twenties you have never fiddled.”
Heat immediately rushes to my cheeks as I try to figure out how to answer her. “Well, I have one toy, but to be honest, I don’t know much about my body. Alessandro has taught me almost everything.”
“Yeah, what kinds of things? I’m curious. He’s so tightly wound, but I think that he would enjoy some dirty, dirty things.” She hops up to sit on the counter, crossing her ankles and swinging them as she waits for my answer.
“I mean, this one time he wanted me to lick and suck his, you know . . . ” El is better at this stuff. She openly tells me about all the things she and Andrea try. She told me recently that she and Andrea have been known to sneak into Alessandro’s office together. I couldn’t imagine what Alessandro would say if he knew. She said it’s all about the thrill.
“Babe. Sex is nothing to be ashamed of, no matter what your family told you. How I see it is if we were only meant to have sex for reproductive reasons, we wouldn’t find pleasure from it. Now, spill or no penis cookies for you.” It’s still weird to talk about, even though she’s right. What if she shames me? What if she says what we did was gross?
“Well, he was teaching me how to you know . . . ” I can’t get the words out.
“Luci. Doll face. I need inspiration for what Andrea and I should do tonight. Get to the nitty gritty or I’m going to smack it out of you.” What’s crazy is I know she would.
I groan before I continue. “Alessandro wanted to teach me how to suck his thing. Then wanted me to . . . ” I make sure Enzo isn’t close enough to hear, and lean in, lowering my voice to a whisper. “He wanted me to put his balls in my mouth and suck them. I did, but then he started pleasuring himself, leaning back and making me lick farther back and…” My whispered tone suddenly cracks into a squeal when I admit what happened. “Oh, El, I’m mortified! It’s insanely unhygienic, but the look on his face and the way he finished all over me was incredibly arousing. I’m so embarrassed!” I hide my face in my hands until El jumps down from the counter, taking them away from my face.
“You have figured out how to hold him in the palm of your hands. Most guys will love some anal play if given the chance. You know?” She catches onto my answer by the look on my face. “You dirty slut! You do know! I should have guessed. The dirty little Catholic girl loves to be fucked in the ass. Seriously though, continue to eat his ass and that man would buy you Australia if you asked. My advice though, jerk him off yourself at the same time and relish in the pleasure on his face. Now here, have a penis cookie and I’ll give you the details on these toys.”
Vibrators, and dildos, and plugs, oh my. The amount of toys El brought is shocking. I didn’t know half of these existed. Currently, she’s talking about some vibrator I’d put inside me and hand the remote to Alessandro.
“Why would we go out in public with it in?”
“We’ve gone over this. It’s the excitement of getting caught. Alessandro will get turned on by you trying to keep your cool and drag you into a dressing room or bathroom. Andrea and I have sex constantly at the store. We’ve been caught enough that I’m convinced they would have fired us if you, Alessandro, and Marco weren’t clients of ours. Oh my God! You should totally give the remote to Alessandro on your wedding day. Do you know how hard he would get by seeing you try to focus on your vows while he controls this? Especially when a priest is marrying you! The second you two are away from everyone, he would drag you somewhere to defile his little wife.”
“What if someone notices we’re missing? My mamma will want to see me right after.”
“I’ll say you two went to pray because Lord knows you’ll be calling for God.” I’m constantly shocked by what comes out of El’s mouth. She switches to the next toy, displaying it as if it were a prize on a TV show.
“And this! It’s a vibrating butt plug.”
“Why does everything have to vibrate?” The words leave my mouth before I have a chance to think them through. El cracks up laughing.
“The simple answer is because of the pleasure it brings. Since you don’t have much experience, I’m sure you haven’t had two guys at once, by the way, amazing. I know Alessandro is not the kind that would share, so this will do. The idea is to have it in, turn it on, and let Alessandro fuck you at the same time. The vibration will make you two go feral.” I can honestly say this one she has me convinced.
We’ve gone through the bags of sex toys El brought, currently laughing and gossiping like old friends, which I guess now she is.
“Do you think you and Andrea will ever get married?” I’ve never seen El defeated until I ask her this and I know I’ve gone too far. “Don’t answer that. Forget it.”
“No, honey, it’s okay. It’s complicated. Andrea’s mom is French, and he was raised on the outskirts of Paris. His father isn’t around, and even though his father was Italian, my parents refuse to accept him because he’s not full Italian. How fucking old school is that? Anyway, even being with Andrea tests the waters on any sort of solid relationship with my parents. To make it worse, we had a massive fight and I moved in with Andrea recently. I would have that fight a thousand times, though, if it meant keeping Andrea. He’s my person.” I’m envious of El and Andrea. They’re perfect together. The way she talks about him and the way he cherishes her is what everyone should strive for. I’m deep into my feelings with Alessandro and I have to accept he will never reciprocate them. I’m not sure he could even if he wanted to.
“Is that why Andrea calls you his treasure?”
“You understood that?”
“Not exactly. Marco called you treasure in Italian and it sounded similar enough to how Andrea said it.”
“It’s a long and several-part story. I’ll summarize it for you. I tend to collect things. I call them my treasures. I’ll collect just about anything, mainly random trinkets and jewelry. It started when I was a kid and would bring random things home from the park that people had lost or dropped. Spare buttons, babies lost socks, etc, and it grew from there. Then when Andrea and I first dated, he saw my little random collections, a.k.a. my treasures. Later he gave me some big speech about how he’s been searching for his trésor, his treasure. Girl, the way I soaked through my underwear at his words! He got the gold star treatment that night.” It’s like El could never mention anything without adding any sort of flirtation to it.
“Where does Marco’s mocking come into place, then?”
“It doesn’t! He’s an asshat that gets off on making fun of people. He’s laughed at Andrea’s nickname for me from day one. Never mind that tonight is about you, not Andrea and I.”
El and I are having enough fun that we miss the sound of the boys getting home until Andrea texts El, letting her know they’re staying the night. We say our goodnights and I sneak into Alessandro’s room, our room, and see him sleeping peacefully. I take a chapter out of El’s book of sex and strip down before climbing into bed, making sure not to disturb him. I’m tipsy and content as I fall asleep, hoping Alessandro and I can have a fraction of what El and Andrea have.