Chapter XXI #2
“Yes,” she whispered. “I felt like such a lie.”
I stood flabbergasted for a moment. I’d thought I had her all pegged, but really I knew nothing about her. Except . . . “While what you say is true, you possess something outside of that. You’re discounting your mortal side and the fact that not all gods and goddesses are revered nor beautiful.”
She bit her lip and mulled over what I’d said. I wasn’t sure whether she believed me or not.
“Why are you being so nice to me?” she asked, with no accusation, just confusion. “Is it just because you find me attractive now?”
Of course she knew that. Regardless, I hated that she had to ask. But what did I expect, given the way I’d treated her?
“Your father told me—chastised me, even—that I didn’t know the real you. I guess I want to know the real you. And I see in you the girl I once wanted to meet,” I mumbled lamely.
She released herself from my grip, blinking. “Oh,” she said, like she was having an aha moment. “That’s why you were so disappointed when we first met. You were expecting the girl on the poster and on TV.”
I swallowed hard, realizing now how I must have come off to her.
A shallow and confused eighteen-year-old boy.
She’d been able to feel my disappointment when she appeared out of nowhere in her father’s backyard in a black dress that held no shape, her eyes peering at me through thick-lensed glasses, her hair hanging limply.
No wonder she hated me. This entire time I’d blamed her, but maybe it was I who was to blame.
“You said during our first run that I was supposed to be different. What did you mean?” I needed to know.
She gazed into my eyes, a debate raging in hers as if she weren’t sure if she should tell me. I all but wanted to beg her to, but I let her come to her own conclusion on the matter. Finally, she breathed out, slow and steady.
“When I first came to live with my father, I was so lost, and my life felt like such a lie. I was so alone, and all I wanted to do was hide. I was so ashamed of my beauty and gifts, all of which I didn’t feel I deserved. This next part might sound creepy.”
She offered me a small smile.
“But when you would come to visit, I would watch you from afar. You were so kind to everyone, and I got this feeling that you might understand me even though I didn’t understand myself.
I know it was stupid, but you were half mortal like me, and anyway, it was naive,” she rushed to say.
“I just thought maybe we would be . . . uh . . . friends.”
The way she said friends made me feel that wasn’t the word she’d meant at all.
What had I missed? The question stung me deeply.
“But obviously I was wrong. And you were disappointed. More than disappointed. I felt it so strongly. So, yeah. That’s it. We should probably go back now.” She pointed toward where the hoedown had been staged.
“Not yet.”
I couldn’t let her leave after the bomb she’d just dropped on me. A bomb of my own making. It was just now occurring to me that Demi had never stolen anything from me. I’d robbed myself. Damn it.
“Demi, I’m sorry. I was eighteen and foolish. I wish I had been different. More mature.”
I had to wonder what my life would have been like had I been.
Would I have gotten to read Demi’s heart?
I wasn’t sure when she’d locked it. I assumed it was after things didn’t work out with whoever it was she’d fallen in love with.
Maybe that was Jonas. But I had no business asking.
Yet, I got this feeling that maybe if I’d gotten to see into her heart, I wouldn’t have a void in me.
It sounded ludicrous, but even with her locked heart, she soothed something in me.
Eros’s admonition that I didn’t know his daughter continued to haunt me. Now more than ever, I knew it was my own fault. And now more than anything, I wanted to know her.
“Again, it was stupid.” She shifted her feet, nervous. “So, anyway. Um . . . should we go back?”
I wanted to tell her no. That we should stay here in whatever this bubble was Zeus had created, but I knew we had to go back, and I knew what I had to do.
“Demi, I promise you I’ll help you complete your quest. We’ll find your true love.”
She shrugged. “I appreciate that, but I don’t know if it’s possible. You know—locked heart, worst goddess of love ever. I’m just not sure it’s in the cards for me. But like I said, I’m just going to help everyone else.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose and groaned. “Please, Demi, I’m begging you, leave the matchmaking to me. You’re giving my crew heartburn, and you’re going to make the studio nervous.”
“I’m not going to play your villain, and I know things about these women and even some of the men. Things that will help them.”
“I’m not asking you to play the villain or even to sideline your gifts. Just please let me do my job. And that job includes helping you.”
“How are you going to help me?”
“I don’t know, but I’m a Cupid and you’re a goddess of love—we should be able to figure this out together.”
The thought of our doing it together felt right.
She tossed her head from side to side. “I don’t know. Maybe,” she hemmed and hawed.
“At least give me a shot. Let me prove to you I’ve earned my Architect of Love title.”
She laughed and rolled her eyes. “Okay, fine, but don’t call yourself that in front of me. It’s disturbing. And . . . don’t try to pit me against the other women. I like them. A lot. We’re all going to stay friends. You can think of some other way to make the show entertaining without catfights.”
It genuinely surprised me that she truly seemed to care about these women.
“Fine,” I agreed.
“So where do we go from here? Where do we start my quest?”
I thought for a moment. The only place I could think to start at was . . . “We get to know each other—and more than just our favorite TV shows. We need to learn to trust each other.”
“Hmm. Roman Archer and me . . . friends. That’s a dangerous proposition.”
I cocked my head. “Why?” I mean, it wasn’t in my best interest considering how attracted I was to her and the fact that if anyone ever found out, I’d get fired. So, in that sense it was dangerous to me. But how was it dangerous to her?
“No reason,” she said, flustered.
I didn’t press, even though I knew she wasn’t exactly being truthful. Maybe as we got to know each other, I’d find out. “So, friends.” I held my hand out to her.
She stared at it warily for a beat before she placed her delicate hand in mine.
My hand encompassed hers, but like a moron, I didn’t shake it.
All I could do was revel in the connection.
Now more than ever, I wished I could go back and meet her for the first time.
I would have tried to see a girl in pain who needed a friend, and not some made-up unfair expectation. A teen fantasy.
The god in my veins begged me not to let go.
Interestingly enough, I got the feeling that Demi was lingering too, giving that part of me time to see if it could read her heart. But that couldn’t be. Surely she didn’t wish me to be the one to unlock it. Besides, it was obvious I couldn’t, no matter how desperately the god in me tried to.
She abruptly pulled away and ran off before I even had the chance to stop her. “See you later!” she called, waving from behind.
Just like that, the bubble we were in burst.
And I just stood there, every part of me wanting it back.