Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-Two
Selene
I adored Remy. He was a wonderful and doting mate to my best friend Marie and had gone out of his way to help me. But that didn’t change the fact that sometimes he massively understated things.
They have a small amount of internal drama. It’ll blow over soon, he’d said. Things might be a little tense when you get there, he’d said.
As I took a sip of the sweet red wine Bastian had provided at the start of dinner and looked around at my new packmates, I was both annoyed and amused at how dysfunctional they were.
Rynn and Cade attempted to make small talk with me, mostly asking about my travel here and my family.
They clearly weren’t used to being the ones to lead the conversation though and were terrible at it.
I wasn’t helping because I didn’t particularly want to discuss either of those things.
When I’d broached the topic of their families, neither answered and instead finished their ales before pouring another.
So apparently family was a sore subject for all of us. Lovely.
Ryker had barely more than grunted at me all evening and had been focused on Rynn.
For her part, she was stubbornly not looking at him, which was impressive, considering he was sitting directly across from her and had this whole presence about him.
Like everyone in Lunaria, I’d heard the rumors about Ryker being rabid, but having been sitting with him for almost twenty minutes now, I was confident he wasn’t.
I absolutely understood why people said it though. There was something incredibly unsettling about him. My instincts very much wanted me to get up and slowly back out of the room, and had he been staring at me the way he was Rynn, I probably would have.
While I hadn’t met any of the Alphas in person before, I knew of them and had done even more research when Remy had told me about his plan.
It was my understanding that Bastian was the most sociable out of all of them, which made sense since he was typically the one who traveled around the Velesian realm, visiting the various packs.
But aside from a brief, polite greeting, he hadn’t spoken a word during dinner.
All of this left me unsure on what to say or do.
Rynn was sweet and clearly trying to make me feel welcome, but there was tension between her and all the Alphas that I couldn’t quite decipher.
It wasn’t outright hostility; that would have had me very concerned and probably plotting my exit. Not that I had anywhere else to go.
Things wouldn’t go well for me if I had to return to the Fervis Order. Again.
I broke off a piece of bread roll and chewed on it, hoping taking a smaller piece would help cover up how stale it was.
Conversation once again stalled out, and an awkward silence filled the room.
I was trying to figure out what I could talk about that would be a safe topic when Rynn sighed and shoved her plate forward.
“Alright, let’s get this over with shall we?” She looked at Cade. “Do you want to tell her or should I?”
“We both know if I attempted it, you would just cut me off and do it yourself.” He waved a hand at her. “So be my guest, Princess.”
My eyebrows rose slightly at the nickname.
Rynn narrowed her eyes at him before letting out a dismissive sound and turning her attention back to me. Her expression was mostly blank, but I noted the creases at the corner of her eyes and mouth. I was quickly learning that Rynn was a very direct person, something I found rather refreshing.
“Here’s the deal,” Rynn started. “On paper, you and I are members of the Alpha pack, but it’s not real. Neither of us will ever be a member of their pack in truth.”
Surprise flickered through me, but I kept it off my face as I glanced around the table to read the reactions of the Alphas.
Both Cade and Bastian gave me a shallow nod, confirming Rynn’s words.
Ryker’s jaw was clenched so hard, I wouldn’t be surprised if he cracked a tooth, but he didn’t say anything to contradict Rynn.
“Okay,” I said slowly. “So what does this mean exactly? Like what will be expected of me as a non-member of this pack?”
I controlled my heart rate as I flitted through the possibilities.
Could I really be this lucky? Because if they didn’t expect anything from me other than keeping up appearances, this might be the best thing that had ever happened to me.
A castle far away from everyone else, where I didn’t have to go through the rejections of yet another pack?
Where I could just be left alone and fill my day with whatever I wanted?
Yes. Please.
“The only thing we require is that any time you appear in public with us, you act as though you are a happy member of this pack,” Cade said.
“And obviously not share the specifics of our agreement with your family or anyone else. As far as the Dragomir pack—and Fervis Order—are concerned, you are a member of our pack. And any direct communication to them must go through me.”
I caught Rynn’s sharp glance at him and the way her mouth tightened.
“Outside of that,” Cade continued, “we don’t expect anything from you and will do our best to make your life comfortable here.
” He paused, solemn brown eyes holding my stare.
“But just to make sure there is no confusion: you are not a part of our pack in any way that actually matters, and you have to be content with that.”
Rynn’s gaze dropped to her half-empty glass. I got the impression she was not happy about this arrangement, which I found a little strange, because best I could tell, she didn’t exactly get along with any of the Alphas, so I didn’t understand why she would want to be part of their pack.
“I understand and accept so long as you do not expect me to become involved with any of you, romantically or physically,” I said evenly.
For the first time that night, I got a reaction out of Cade. Something dark and dangerous swam in his eyes. “Have you been forced into situations you didn’t want in any of your previous packs?”
That was a complicated question.
“No,” I settled on, not wanting to get into this topic any more than my family. “Just wanted to make sure that wouldn’t be part of the agreement.”
“Nobody here is gonna force you into their bed, sweetheart,” Bastian drawled, finally contributing to the conversation.
“But if you want to fall into it, I won’t complain.
” He gave me a wicked smile that I was sure had had more than one person shredding their clothing and throwing themselves at him.
I arched an eyebrow. “Not interested. Also not a fan of boring terms of endearment.”
Bastian tilted his head, and the light from the Fae lantern caused a sheen to roll over his eyes as he chuckled. “So she does have claws. I was beginning to worry you were going to be boring.”
“And I was worried you were going to be something more than just a pretty face.” I shrugged. “It seems neither of us have cause for concern.”
Internally, I winced at the meanness of my reply, but I kept it off my face. Usually, I did my best to appear agreeable and laid back, but I’d been here less than twelve hours, and I could feel my facade already breaking.
Rynn and the Alphas weren’t exactly what I’d thought they’d be, and it was throwing me off.
“Well, I like her,” Ryker said, still not taking his attention off Rynn.
“Your opinion doesn’t count.” Bastian snorted, his bright green eyes looking at me with curiosity. “Since we’re all being so honest, how about you tell us why you’ve had multiple failed packs? One or two happens, but we’re what, your fourth one?”
“Sixth, but who’s counting?” I flashed him a humorless smile.
“Someone’s been busy.” Bastian held my gaze, and there was a coldness in it that sent my instincts on edge. I’d met more than my fair share of beautiful faces, perhaps not as gorgeous as Bastian but close. I knew the cruelty that could lurk beneath.
“Careful,” Rynn rasped, her unusual eyes locked on Bastian.
To my surprise, his expression thawed slightly. “Apologies, Selene. I’m sure you’ve been through a lot. But knowing a little more about you and your past would be appreciated.”
Oh, that’s an easy answer. It’s because I don’t enjoy sex.
No, nothing bad has ever happened to me.
There’s no trauma in my life to explain why I don’t like it.
I simply don’t. The way some people don’t like potatoes or don’t like to be hugged.
I do like to be hugged, by the way. I like to kiss.
I like to hold hands. But those things always seem to lead to sex, so I’ve decided it’s just better to go without.
Because when I tell people all this, they usually respond with, “Oh, you just haven’t met the right person yet,” or “You weren’t doing it right,” or “You’ll like it with me.
” And then when I, in fact, do not like it with them, they get mad and blame me.
Even though I was nothing but honest from the beginning.
Then the relationship becomes tense and falls apart.
Every. Single. Time. All because they had the audacity to believe they knew me better than I know myself.
That would have probably been too much honesty.
I fixed a polite smile on my face. “Nothing all that interesting. I was merely unlucky and was bartered to clans where our personalities simply did not mesh. But given that this is my sixth attempt, I would prefer that it was successful. So I’m more than willing to work with the unusual circumstances.
Based on what Rynn has told me and what I’ve seen, you don’t have much help around here.
I’m more than willing to fill that need, to an extent.
” I wouldn’t be anyone’s servant, but I also hated to be bored, so occasionally cleaning didn’t bother me. “And I do love to cook and bake.”
Ryker stirred to life. “You do?”