16. Anastasia
Chapter 16
Anastasia
My eyes are closed as I move through the positions that are ingrained into my muscles. Gentle hands, raised arms, straight back. Over and over again, I let the classical music move me as I run through the familiar dance. Sweat builds at my temples and on the nape of my neck, causing it to itch, but I don’t dare to break the spell that’s cast over me.
Ballet has always been my salvation. It’s the only thing that’s given back exactly what I’ve put in.
No matter how much I loved my mother, she still died. No matter how much I begged my father, he never returned to his old self. No matter how much I wanted to help my older brother, he never let me in.
I understand why. He wanted me to feel the happiness the world tried to take from me. He just never understood that I wanted to give that back. To put in just as much effort into his happiness as he does mine.
That’s why finding the tiara is so important. That’s why I insisted on being the one to do this, even though he doesn’t understand.
He’d have given up everything for me, and I can’t accept that. Not this time.
My shoulders burn as I twist, keeping my arms above my head, and my thighs tremble as I maintain the perfect pose and spin until I’m dizzy, letting my mind sink into the moment and my worries fade.
My phone buzzes on by the front desk, and I ignore it, focusing on the pattern of the dance, picturing the heat of the lights and the crowd in front of me until the vibration stops. I move into another sequence, only to have the buzz start again and again. Frustration replaces my peace, and I drop my heels down and stomp my way to the counter. Each step is louder than the next. My ballet instructor would have made me work for hours if she caught me like this.
I flip the phone over, ready to turn it off, when I spot the message.
Future Husband: Whatcha doing?
Why am I not surprised he’s programmed this into my phone? I’m not even going to try to figure this out.
Future Husband: I feel like it’s been forever since I saw you.
I resist responding and giving him exactly what he wants.
Future Husband: Ignoring me now, Princess? That’s not very nice.
Future Husband: You know I’ll just keep trying.
Future Husband: This is starting to hurt my feelings. I know you’ve read this.
A laugh slips from my lips. He can be ridiculously immature, and it somehow leaks into me.
Future Husband: I know you want to reply.
Me: I’m busy.
The phone rings, and I fumble it in my hand, barely catching it before it hits the floor. Future Husband is clear at the top, and I let it ring until it hits voicemail. What is he thinking? It starts again, over and over, before his persistence has a bubbling sensation forming in my chest. How can he be like this? I’m perfectly aware of what the Lords do. How they rule over everyone and what that entails. So how is he so unserious?
Future Husband: We should really talk about yesterday.
Future Husband: Now that I know you want me too.
Goose bumps rise as I remember exactly how his rough fingers felt against my skin. Heat pools low in my stomach, and I press my thighs together. Whether I’m willing to admit it or not, my body responds to him.
Future Husband: Princess, come out and play with me. You know you want to.
Me: You are delusional.
I switch his name to “Psycho,” but it looks too cold for him, so I can’t resist adding a heart beside it. I’ve been acting out of character since I met him. Doing things I’d never dreamed of. I’ve been chalking it up to needing him to find the tiara and ignoring the voice in the back of my head whispering that I like the way he makes me feel.
Psycho 3: Stasia! I miss you.
I suck in a breath as warmth fills my chest. I let it out slowly. It’s been so long since someone other than Nikolai cared about me. Clearly, it’s making me desperate. I block his number before I can do anything stupid, like reply.
I down my water in three large gulps and drop it on the counter. The loud clunk fills the room, causing me to flinch. Ballet dancers are poised. Bash makes me feel anything but. Still, I can’t help but admit a tiny, traitorous part of me likes it.
Returning to the wooden bar, I try to resume my practice, but it’s pointless. The door to the alley keeps catching my attention, and exactly what happened out there threatens to suck me in. I would have kissed him, pressed my mouth against his. I wanted to feel his body against mine until he took my thoughts away.
Embarrassment took away my relief when he was the one to step back. His eyes were narrow, and his constant grin was pulling at the corner of his lip, but his usual mischievousness was missing, replaced by a longing I didn’t recognize but pulled me to him, nonetheless.
He’d given me a look like he was a wolf who’d finally cornered its prey.
Not daring to go into the alley, I leave the garbage full. I’ll empty it next time. When I’m not so caught up in that moment. I pull on jogging pants over my black leotard and button up my jacket. That bastard stole my favorite sweater, and I haven’t gotten the chance to replace it yet. Hopefully, Nikolai doesn’t notice it’s missing.
There’s no sign of my Uber when I lock the door behind me. Instead, there’s a black town car with tinted windows waiting on the road. There’s no mistaking the man standing with the back door open is a guard.
The hair stands up at the back of my neck. I still have time, so why are the Salvatores coming to collect me?
My phone buzzes in my hand, and an unknown number pops up.
Unknown: Get in the car, Princess.
My emotions alternate between relieved and pissed. Relieved that I’m not being swept away by mob bosses and pissed that Bash thinks he can order me around.
The guard gives me an apologetic smile. “Please get in the car before he kills me.”
I raise one brow.
“I have a wife and kids,” he pleads.
Well, shit . I let him guide me into the back seat, unsure if he’s actually in danger, but I’m not going to risk it. It’s obvious whether it’s true or not, this man believes it.
There’s a strong scent of lemons when I climb in, the guard rapidly getting behind the wheel as if he’s worried if given enough time, I’ll escape.
“I’m Carter.”
I rub my palms into my eyes, suddenly exhausted. “I’m Anastasia.”
Seeming to understand my need for silence, he’s quiet the rest of the way.
I don’t have time to be distracted; there are more important things going on in my life. And if I can’t figure it out soon, I’ll find myself married to some Russian rando or at the mercy of the Salvatores. Nikolai said we could sell the company and disappear. That we don’t need the Order to be happy. Maybe I could have done that before, but I have the distinct impression that our grandmother won’t let either of us go unless I get her the tiara.
She’s quicker than I expected, figuring out that my brother’s my weakness and can be used to control me. She’d applied just enough pressure to get me to risk my life to do what she wants.
The problem is my only lead went cold. Sure, I found the tiara, but it’s useless if I’m unable open the case. I need to figure out how to unlock it, but it’s not like it’s something I can Google. I can’t even repeat what I did before. Bash might be immature, but he’s not stupid enough to let me get him drunk and ply him with questions a second time. Not to mention, something tells me I’m the one who will lose that game.
On top of that, snooping around isn’t an option. Eventually, I will get caught, and that might as well be a death sentence.
I startle when my phone vibrates in my pocket. There’s a message from one of my favorite stores telling me the jacket I wanted is back in stock. I delete the text, knowing I can’t buy it, anyway. I try to ignore the irrational hint of disappointment itching at my skin, revealing that a part of me was excited that it might be Bash. I block the unknown number he’d texted from, slicing his ability to reach me.
I refuse to be happy about his annoying persistence.
He’s shown up everywhere he shouldn’t at the absolute worst times. I thought I was done for when he pulled off my hood in the Vault, catching me red-handed, but he’d just tilted his head and stared at me with amusement. Like I’m the most interesting thing he’s ever encountered. The question remains: why didn’t he turn me in? He had all the information he needed. He caught me snooping in the hall. I don’t believe for a second he believed I was lost. He knows I’ve been to that ballroom countless times.
If he didn’t say anything then and didn’t tell his brothers when he found me in the Vault, it’s possible he has no plans of handing me over. What if I just tell him why I need the tiara? Would he help me get it? He is a Lord, after all. If anyone could, it’s him.
I shove the thoughts into the back of my brain and lock it with a click. It’s because he’s a Lord that I can’t trust him. He’s more than likely just playing with me, and when my novelty runs out, the game will be over.
Letting my guard down around him is absolutely not an option.
The glass of the car window is cool on my cheek, still warm from the hour I spent exercising. We’re blocks away from the turnoff to my street, where the homes become more and more luxurious.
I glance at the corner store with its flashing open sign.
“You can let me off here,” I tell the driver as I grab my purse.
He glances back at me through the rearview mirror, eyes wide. “I can’t do that, miss.”
“Are you kidnapping me? Am I your captive?”
He pulls the car to the curb, not before murmuring to himself. “I’m so fucking dead.”
“Tell him I threatened you.” I wink as I get out of the car. The air is cool against my skin, the breeze lifting the damp hair from the nape of my neck.
“Just be careful.” He’s practically begging.
“Don’t worry, I’ve done this countless times.”
He doesn’t look reassured as I walk away.
The bell on the door chimes when I enter the convenience store. The bright strip lights cast the space in a warm glow. It’s nice, with a good selection, something I’m lucky to have so close by. I enter my favorite aisle. It’s lined with different flavors of instant ramen. The cups are already prepared; just need to add boiling water. Something even I can handle.
It’s not that I can’t afford groceries, but if anything happens, I need money to get out of here. It’s not like I can pull out of our savings account. Nikolai and I drained every last cent to pay down our father’s debt, and it still wasn’t enough.
Most people would just make stuff at home, but it’s embarrassing to admit I have no idea how to cook. Even my scrambled eggs turned out gross. I watched a few videos before I admitted it’s useless and turned to instant food. At least this stuff tastes amazing.
Later in the week, I’ll grab some individual frozen meals. Even I can warm things up. Although they’re sometimes still frozen in the middle. You’d think with all our technology, the companies could figure that out.
I bring an armful of the premade cups to the counter and place them down lightly. The woman, Shirly, smiles at me. She’s older, maybe in her mid to late sixties. Her hair is a mix of curly white and gray that she’s pulled back into a clip.
“You should really eat something healthier. A girl like you can’t be eating things like this.” She looks me up and down. “You’re even smaller than the last time.”
Even though she’s admonishing me, her voice is filled with warmth and genuine concern. More like a grandma than a clerk.
She packs my things into a plastic bag and adds a few apples. “Take care of yourself.”
I smile. She makes it sound so simple. “I promise I will.”
“I’m serious, young lady. You don’t want old Shirly getting involved.”
“I’ll get groceries tomorrow. Don’t worry.”
“Make sure you get meat and vegetables. You can’t live off of noodles.” She points a thin finger at me. “You know I have a grandson about your age.”
This isn’t the first time she’s mentioned him, and I’ve learned better than to stick around. Last time, she got him on the phone and tried to set up a date. I’m not even sure how I got out of that, but I doubt I’ll be able to do it a second time.
I glance at my watchless wrist. “Sorry, it’s late. I’ve got to get home.”
“Fine, fine. I haven’t given up having you as a granddaughter.”
Her words feel like a warm hug as I exit. If only it didn’t require me to marry some unknown guy to make it a reality.
My sneakers are silent as I make my way down the sidewalk. The large oak trees lining the road and coming together in the center make it look like it belongs in a different world. We’re slightly out of the city, but even then, this magical place doesn’t belong. As a little girl, I loved it here. The way the apple trees blossomed in the spring and the lilac bushes filled the air with their soft scent. My chest tightens, knowing we should sell our place, but unfortunately, our father took out multiple liens on it, so even if we did, we wouldn’t see any money. No, we need to get the tiara to my grandmother so we can settle our debts.
That’s the only way to keep our lives the way they are.
My eyelids droop as I get closer to my house, exhaustion slowly taking over. I haven’t slept properly since that night I spent gambling. Every time I close my eyes, a pair of gray eyes look back at me.
The light I leave on in the hallway beckons me home. I hate entering into a dark house. I take the five steps up to my front door, only to have it swing open.
The bag of food I’d been carrying hits the ground as a scream catches in my throat.
Bash is standing in front of me, wearing a devilish smile.
“You know, you really should have better security.”