42. Anastasia
Chapter 42
Anastasia
It feels like the entire world is caving in on itself as I stare, helpless to do anything as the barrel of the gun is pointed right at Bash. Panic burns through my veins as the click of the safety being turned off echoes off the walls. My mouth is bone-dry, and the words are caught in my throat as I stand frozen. I wish I’d never come here. I shouldn’t have risked it.
I want to push him out of the way, but I can’t risk that triggering the guard.
I glance at Bash. A muscle ticks in his jaw as he casts a side-eye toward the entrance. Confusion fogs my mind where I’m trembling, whereas he looks annoyed.
“Don’t worry. It’s me,” Bash says casually, almost bored.
The guard lowers his weapon. “I’m sorry, sir. Why aren’t you using the front door?”
Bash’s laugh is dry as he looks into my eyes. “I thought it would be more interesting this way.”
My brain kicks in, processing the last few minutes, the meaning behind his words. I’m so freaking stupid. He’s not worried about the guard because there’s no reason for him to be. He’s a Lord in the Order of Saints. The rock in my stomach plummets to the ground, leaving me hollow. He really could have gotten it all along. My chest caves, and a flush of heat crawls up my neck as embarrassment at my stupidity takes over. He must have thought this was hilarious. Naive little Princess, falling for his games. Nothing but a plaything for the Prince of the Order.
It’s as if he’d been holding my heart in his palms and waiting for the perfect time to crush it. Tears blur my vision, and I flinch when Bash reaches in to wipe them.
He freezes, fingers inches away. “It’s not what you think.”
I fight to keep my voice steady and ignore the part that desperately wants to believe him. “Oh yeah? So you weren’t able to get the tiara the entire time?”
“Okay, maybe it’s exactly what you think.” He says it with a tentative smile, but his normally disarming playfulness just cuts me deeper.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Everything’s really been a joke to him. I don’t want to admit it. I can’t accept it. There needs to be something I’m missing, but with every response, he slices me deeper.
“Where’s the fun in that?” His words are light, but there’s something breaking behind his eyes. Something I don’t want to trust but still pulls at my heart.
Stupid freaking heart. I can’t trust myself right now. I let the fire coursing through me burn through all of my doubts.
“Fun!” Anger ripples through me. “I’ll give you fun.”
“You shouldn’t make threats you don’t intend to keep.” Bash catches my wrist as I swing it toward him, holding it gently.
He’s infuriating, standing there composed like I’m not falling apart.
“Why are you laughing? You knew how badly I needed it. “ His reaction doesn’t make sense. None of this makes sense.
I go to rake my fingers through my hair but hiss at the sting in my palm. He reaches up and grasps my wrist, cradling my hand in his. His graze is light, careful not to touch the friction burn itself.
I meet his eyes, trying to make sense of what’s happening. “You knew I needed it. That it was important to me. If you could get it all this time, why didn’t you just give it to me?”
Bash cups my neck, curling his fingers around the nape, stopping me from pulling away as he says, “At first, I was curious. You were like a light that cut through the boredom. I couldn’t get enough of you. It wasn’t long before I was completely enraptured by you. You are so much more than I ever expected. You’re funny, daring, and so fucking clever. I swear I’ve spent my life waiting for you. I won’t apologize, Stasia. You are mine. You needed the time to realize it.”
There’s a tendril of heat warming my stomach, and I desperately try to snuff it out. This man betrayed me.
“What about my brother? You were fine with him being with those killers?” I hiss.
“I got the same information as you did today. I had my suspicions, so I got Xander to look into them, but I swear I told you as soon as we knew. I would never have let someone hurt your family. Not when I know how much that would hurt you. You’re mine to protect now, Stasia. That includes everything important to you.”
“This is my life. Is this all some kind of game to you? Am I some kind of game?” I hang on to the last threads of anger, needing to hear him deny it.
“Never.” He leans in close, capturing me in his gaze. “You don’t seem to understand, so I’ll keep telling you until you do. I love you, Anastasia Volkov.”
My throat closes, and my eyes burn. I clench my teeth to keep myself from saying something idiotic in return. This man hasn’t proven anything to me yet.
Bash places gentle kisses over my cheekbones, wet with my tears. He kisses my forehead, my nose, covering every inch of my face.
“Admit it. You love me too.” He grins, and it’s somehow adorable and mischievous. It makes me want to both slap him and kiss him at the same time.
“You’re delusional,” I huff.
“You’re in denial.” He chuckles, forehead meeting mine. “You are it for me, and I hate to break it to you, but I’m too fucking selfish to let you go.”
I should shove him away. He’s lied to me, but some twisted part of me doesn’t care. Actually, it likes the fact that he’s willing to go this far just to catch me. Our breaths mingle together, and the tension in the air grows thick with each heartbeat. I don’t deny it.
“I’m going to fuck those doubts right out of you,” he says right before he crashes his mouth to mine.
His tongue dominates my mouth, reaching every corner, filling me as his fingers bury in my hair, pulling out the hair tie. He kisses me harder, demanding more. Demanding me to give in to him.
Not yet. I can’t let him get away with this. I bite his lip hard, the tang of metal hitting my senses. “Let go.”
He runs his thumb over her bottom lip, smearing the blood, and has the audacity to laugh.
“You are truly a vicious little creature,” he says, then throws me over his shoulder. I struggle to get down, twisting and kicking my weight, but the sharp sting of his palm lands on my ass, keeping me still.
The guards stare at us, eyes blown wide as we walk by.
“I hate you,” I hiss.
“Liar.”