22. My First Guest
MY FIRST GUEST
“ Y ou didn’t need to clean the tub,” she said when Abe walked into the kitchen five minutes later.
“I probably didn’t clean it as well as you, but I sprayed and wiped it down and then rinsed it. I know how dirty I am at the end of the day. My mother got me in the habit of spraying it down daily so that it doesn’t build up before I can scrub it on the weekends.”
She wouldn’t cringe over the fact he only cleaned his bathroom on the weekends.
She’d been in his house enough to know he was a pretty neat guy.
There was no buildup anywhere, no sticky substances, mold, or smells that didn’t belong.
Was there dust in the corner of the floor? Probably. It’s not like she went around with a pair of white gloves and she wouldn’t.
But she and Aster were so far in the other direction of how they were raised.
“I appreciate it,” she said. “I told you how it was growing up. It’s just this anxious thing with me now. I can handle toys being out of place and clutter. It’s things like filth. And this place is so beautiful, I don’t want it to be anything else.”
“I know,” he said. “I get it. It saved me from going home to shower, but I wouldn’t leave it like I was rinsing off from a mud bath either.”
“You weren’t that dirty. Not sure why you make such a big deal about it,” she said closing one eye to look at him.
“Because you’ve seen me with red paint on my face among other things.”
“Good point,” she said. “Hungry?”
“I’m starving,” he said. “It smells good. What did you make?”
“Sausage and beef ragu and I will put it over cheese ravioli. It’s more of a winter meal, but it’s filling and I’m sure you burn a lot of calories. Plus it’s nice and cool in the house.”
“Sounds great to me,” he said. “Because, you know, as long as I’m not cooking. I even told Poppy and Reese that tonight. Not having to cook is a nice thing at the end of the day.”
“I don’t mind it,” she said. “Or I enjoy it. It’s cheaper and better for you than takeout. Sit. Do you want a beer? The ravioli is almost done. I started it when you were in the shower.”
“A beer sounds good,” he said. “You don’t have to wait on me.”
He stood up and moved to the fridge, opened it, and grabbed one out.
She’d paid attention to what he drank last time and made sure she had it in the house.
“I’m being a good host,” she said.
“Are you back to being nervous again?” he asked.
She inhaled and let out a breath. “Yes. This is so stupid.”
“What is?”
“You’re the first guest I’ve ever had.”
“Really?” he asked.
“Yes. I had friends over to my house as a kid, but the older I got I was too embarrassed. And that doesn’t count.”
“But I’m not a friend,” he said. “I’d like to think I’m not a guest either.”
“I know,” she said. “I’m still trying to navigate all of this.”
“Your water is boiling over,” he said, laughing.
She never lost her attention when cooking before and moved quickly to take care of it.
“Sorry,” she said. “Can you get the dishes down? They are in the cabinet to the right of the sink.”
He reached over her and got them down, found the silverware, and set everything out, then she brought it to the island.
“I’m used to serving myself off the oven,” he said, laughing. “Sorry about that.”
“It’s fine,” she said. “I do that most of the time too. Like I said, my first guest.”
She felt like a fool that she was making a bigger deal about this.
“So you’ve never had an overnight guest then?” he asked when they started to eat.
“No,” she said. “I never wanted any guy to spend the night at my parents’ house even if they weren’t home. I’d stay at their place and that was few and far between. I didn’t normally spend the night with someone.”
“Does that mean you don’t want to?” he asked. “Just trying to understand.”
“I do,” she said. “It hasn’t come up until now. But I should tell you that I did tell Aster about us and he wants to meet you.”
“I figured. My mother wants to meet you.”
Her eyes got wide and she choked on her bite of food. “You told your mother about me?”
He laughed. “Yes. You told your brother.”
“Yeah, but...I guess they mean the same in our lives.”
“That’s right,” he said. “If you weren’t going to tell people about us, I’d start to think it was a secret. It’d make me feel bad about myself.”
She rolled her eyes over the impish grin on his face.
There he was trying to make her laugh again.
“I doubt that.”
“You don’t know if I’m joking or serious. But I’m serious about this dinner. This is great.”
“You work hard,” she said. “You need to replenish at the end of the day.”
“I do,” he said.
“Can I confess something else to you without sounding clingy or like a weirdo who is planning out the next ten years of our lives?”
“Sure,” he said. “As long as you don’t tell me you want to make yourself a basketball team full of kids.”
“Oh,” she said. “Never mind.”
This time he was coughing on his food. “You want five kids?”
She laughed. “Got you,” she said, pointing at him.
“Jesus,” he said. “I like kids and all, but five is a bit much for anyone. Not to mention the cost of them.”
“I know,” she said. “I’d never have that many. I want kids, but no more than two. That isn’t what I was going to say.”
“Then what?” he asked.
“I was going to say that I’ve never been the type of woman who had these big goals in their life. I was always ashamed of that fact. That I was more concerned about putting one foot in front of the other.”
“There is no reason to feel ashamed over that,” he said.
“I know. But I did. I started to think I wasn’t much different than my parents by thinking short term that way, but I was trying to get through.”
“And you did,” he said. “Lots of people live their lives that way.”
“I know,” she said. “Where I was going with this is that when I tried to picture my future and what I wanted in my life it was to be stable. A nice job. A home to come to every night after work. A man in my life that I could look after and he’d do the same for me. That we’d take care of each other.”
He reached his hand over to hers and she felt a lot less silly saying the words out loud. “That is similar to how I saw my life.”
“Really?” she asked. Her voice was on the shy side, she knew, but she couldn’t control it either.
“Yes,” he said. “Maybe we’ve both been single for so long because what we want and look for is a dying breed. I’m not out to conquer the world or keep up with the Joneses.”
“I never thought that,” she said. “Then I see this property I’m living on and it almost scares me. I’d be terrified if it was mine. All these eyes would be on me. Sometimes it’s better to just be normal.”
“I’d hardly say you were normal,” he said, laughing. “This meal sure the hell isn’t.”
“You’re so ruled by your gut,” she said. “And I like it. I really do. I’m not saying I want to bust my ass being a homemaker.”
“You just want a home,” he said. “Right?”
“I do. I want a partner and a home and a life that I saw others had and I never thought I’d get.”
“Do you see yourself getting it with me?” he asked quietly.
She shouldn’t be surprised that he brought it up.
“I’m not trying to scare you or anything.”
“You’re not,” he said. “Because the truth is, you’re saying all the things I’ve been thinking.”
“I guess all the people saying that we are good together know what they are talking about.”
Even if she didn’t want that stress on her shoulders.
“I don’t care about them,” he said. “I only care about you and what you want.”
“Right now,” she said, “I want to finish eating, then have you take me to bed, and stay the night.”
“Then we want the same things.”