27. No Other Way
NO OTHER WAY
“ M om,” Abe said, going in to hug his mother as she walked toward him at the airport.
He had to drive to Providence, Rhode Island, the closest airport for his mother to come in from Florida. Not a big deal. Less than an hour.
Sometimes living in beautiful tourist towns you had to make sacrifices.
If he lived in a bigger area, he’d have a larger company and more clients.
Or maybe not. Might be there’d be more competition too.
He liked his life the way it was now. Not sure he’d change much of it, even if there were times when what he did for a living cost him some happiness in his personal life.
If he was that unhappy, then it wasn’t meant.
That was what he tried to remind himself for years.
“Give your mother a hug,” Carrie Cooke said.
He went into her arms because if he didn’t she’d swat him.
He wanted her hug anyway, so no hardship on his end.
“How are you feeling?” he asked. “You’re walking great.”
“I feel fine. Not much can hurt me now. I’m not going to lie and say that sitting for long periods of time doesn’t make me stiff.”
“You’ve never sat for long periods of time in your life,” he said. He got that from his mother.
“No,” his mother said. “Never.”
“You might get bored being here for a few weeks,” he said.
He’d been surprised that she’d said she was staying that long. Not that he didn’t want her in the house, but it would put a damper on his relationship.
He’d just go stay with Daphne.
“I doubt it,” his mother said. “I’m going to get a rental car on Monday.”
“That will help,” he said. It’s not like he could give her his truck or one of the company trucks. He needed them. He didn’t have a spare car either.
Though he’d thought of it for years. That maybe he should buy a car to drive around when he wasn’t working.
Just another thing that women he’d dated in the past complained about. That they were picked up and dropped off in a work truck.
It’s not that he didn’t keep it clean. He always did, for the most part.
“And I’ll come into the office and get some work done. I know April could use some help. You’ve told me how busy you are.”
“You’ve seen it yourself,” he said. “She’d appreciate the help. You can let me know your thoughts on getting April some help permanently. I worry that I won’t have any work for the person in the winter months. I worry about even April staying busy.”
“She likes being slower for a few months,” his mother said. “It lets her catch up on other things.”
That was good to hear. There was always something for him to do. He still had a lot of clients that he and Mac plowed for. Businesses and homes. He had the McGill Estate now, which was a massive undertaking alone.
“I’m glad she talks to you about that,” he said.
He liked April and all, but she was older and didn’t say much to him in terms of anything other than work. She didn’t speak up if she was under or overworked, though he asked if he thought of it.
Guess he just took it for granted that his mother still had a handle on it.
“She does,” his mother said. “Don’t worry.
” They walked to his truck together, him pulling his mother’s suitcase.
“She might seem frazzled at times, but I’ll step in and do what I can for her.
Do I think she needs help? Maybe next summer consider an intern or college student you can pay.
April would like someone to do busy work things more than anything. ”
“Good to know,” he said. “Are you hungry? We can stop and get some lunch.”
It was noon now. He knew his mother had been at airports since seven this morning. Her flight was direct, but still three hours, then arriving early and now the almost hour drive home.
“I can wait until we get to your house,” his mother said. She pulled a granola bar out of her large purse. She always had food on her.
“Where’s mine?” he asked, laughing.
She handed it over and he shook his head at her. He’d only been kidding.
“You’re still joking about everything.”
“You’d have me no other way,” he said.
He put her suitcase in the backseat of his four-door truck, the two of them climbing in.
He wanted to ask his mother if she needed help, but the dirty look she gave him over his hesitation when she went to climb in told him to keep his mouth shut.
“There were days I wish you were another way,” his mother said. “But you’ve always been a happy kid and that is all a mother could ever ask for.”
He snorted. “Not always so happy.”
“Don’t think of Ella,” his mother said sternly. “She wasn’t right for you. I know you imagined a life with her.”
“It was hard not to,” he said. “She made me believe even when in the back of my mind I knew it wouldn’t work out. Then I see her out with her new guy and the smile on her face is the one I always wanted to give her.”
His mother turned sharply. “Don’t hold onto other memories. I thought you were feeling that way with Daphne.”
“I am,” he said. “I guess that is where I’m going with this. I see Daphne and she understands me more than Ella ever did. She’s my type of woman. My type of person in general.”
“That is important,” his mother said. “That you can get along on a personal level. That she can be your friend along with your lover.”
“She’s a friend,” he said. “We have such a good time together. She is more than I ever thought I’d have in a partner.”
His mother got a soft smile on her face. “Have you told her you love her yet?”
“No,” he said. “It’s hard to say the words.”
“Not so hard if you mean them,” his mother said. “Do you think she doesn’t feel the same way?”
He thought of the conversations he’d had with Daphne in the past. “I don’t know and that bothers me more than I think.”
“I think you do know,” his mother said. “But you’re scared.”
“Shit yeah,” he said. “I’d be an idiot to not be with what I’ve been through.”
“Stop trying to be a martyr,” his mother said, laughing. “Abe, you’re not the first guy that a woman they loved decided she wanted something different.”
“Ella wanted something better .”
“In your eyes, it’s better. It’s not. It’s different. You’re putting words on it that don’t need to be there and spending way too much time focusing on it. Why?”
“I ran into her a few times this summer.”
“Oh really?” his mother asked. “This is getting interesting. Why am I only hearing about this now?”
He shrugged. He shouldn’t have brought it up and now had to use his words wisely.
He was not sure he ever did that before. Used his words wisely.
Most times they spewed like water out of an open fire hydrant.
It was as his mother said—he was always the funny one.
“I don’t normally talk to you about these things,” he said. “It’s not even a dude conversation.”
“But you are now. So tell me on the drive. It’s our form of entertainment and I can knock your head back in the right direction.”
“I think it’s in the right direction,” he argued.
“No, Abe. It’s not. Not if you are saying the things you are. So let me get to work,” his mother said, rubbing her hands together, then stretching them out interlaced to crack her knuckles.
He sighed. “I get my personality from you. You know that, right?”
“Thanks for the compliment. I’m going to take it as I’m always a happy person too.”
He snorted. “Nope, you’re not.”
“Hey,” his mother said, swatting his arm. “Not nice.”
“The truth always isn’t,” he said, putting his chin in the air, then turning to grin at her.
“You’re avoiding. Talk about Ella.”
“Fine,” he said. His mother saw right through that like she always did. “I ran into her and her new guy a few months ago. She looked happy. She was smiling and laughing, holding his arm and almost hugging him.”
Leaning into the dude like she was flirting and playing. Like she did when the two of them dated early on too.
That new relationship where you couldn’t get enough of each other.
The honeymoon phase. Who the hell didn’t love that?!
It wasn’t nearly as strong as what he had with Daphne.
That first night with Daphne, he couldn’t get her out of his mind.
He didn’t obsess about Ella like he did with Daphne in the beginning.
His mother was right. He needed to put his ex from his mind.
But failing was hard to do and that was how he felt with Ella.
That he failed her. He failed at a relationship.
He just failed as a man because no man wanted to feel as if they didn’t or couldn’t measure up.
“So,” his mother said. “People put on a show in public. I can’t tell you the number of times I thought Ella forced herself to laugh and smile around me.”
“What?” he asked. “Why do you say that?”
“Because a woman knows when another doesn’t want to be somewhere.”
“You’ve never said that before,” he said. “Ella never said she didn’t like you.”
His mother let out a forced laugh. “I didn’t say she didn’t like me, just that she didn’t always like to come around the house. Maybe she worried I knew more about your relationship than she was comfortable with. You guys were on and off a few times.”
“I didn’t tell you everything,” he said. “She’d ask and I’d say I kept it to myself.”
“But she didn’t believe it. Ella could never make up her mind. She was the one that always was breaking things off or saying she needed space and then you’d be the idiot to go back. Don’t be that idiot anymore.”
“Never,” he said. “I gave her one too many chances. I finally walked away from her a few weeks ago.”
“What happened then?” his mother asked.
“I was getting a part for the lawn mower. She was there buying plants and then smiling and telling me she had to put all the knowledge she learned from me to good use.”
His mother’s face was priceless as it wrinkled when she shrank back as if he’d just flattened a skunk in the road.
“That’s funny when she always wanted you to do that work at her place.”
“I know,” he said. “And when she brought that up the first thing that came into my head was that I should teach Daphne how to plant. Or give her a book on it. She’s trying to find a hobby because she’s not used to having time on her hands.”
“See,” his mother said. “There is your answer right there. You see your ex and all it does is bring up your current girlfriend.”
“Yeah,” he said. “All the things I want or need in my life are with Daphne.”
“Then stop dragging your damn feet and tell her how you feel!”