Chapter 25 - Jael
Jael
XXV
Kalla’s screams shattered my heart, and I stuffed the bag of powder into my pocket so I could grip her arms and help ease her thrashing.
Cliff did his best to hold her steady, but I couldn’t leave her to fend for herself.
Every shriek was another knife to my chest, tearing me part from the inside.
My beautiful lily, the song that warmed my soul, should never have needed to make sounds like this.
It killed me that my people had done this to her—that they had confirmed all the reasons her people stayed in hiding.
But I’d show her there was more out there than the cruelty she’d been taught to anticipate. No matter how hard she fought, I wouldn’t let her go.
“It will burn hot but brief, lutrena. Hold on.”
I prayed to the sky and earth and river that I was telling the truth, that I’d given her the antidote quickly enough. If the toxin had already spread too far, the magic in the powder would never catch up in time, and she would die in this torment.
My heart slammed against my rib cage at the thought that this might be how I lost her. That she might die at my hands for trying to save her instead of at the hands of the enemy. If she did, Cliff would kill me, and I would deserve it.
More than that, I would welcome it. I thought of how I’d lain in the bloody grass after the ambush and opened my arms to my end.
I’d been so tired of the constant anger, the constant struggle to find reasons to keep breathing.
Kalla had given me a reason, and if she died tonight, part of me would die with her. I would have no choice but to follow.
Her muscles tensed, and her eyes rolled back in her head as blood trickled out of her mouth from where she’d bitten her tongue.
Nausea sloshed in my gut and chills chased sweats across the back of my neck, but I stayed where I was, held her eye, and coached her through the pain, clinging to my sanity even as she clung to life.
When her screams fell silent, my own nearly broke free to fill their place. This wasn’t right. This wasn’t how the taphis root was supposed to work. I’d never seen anyone go so far and come back. I tightened my grip on her and pleaded with her to stay with me.
Her pale brow glistened, her eyes turned glassy before they fluttered closed, and her complexion washed out to an even more ghostly white than it usually was.
“Kal, you still with us?” Cliff asked. “Kal? Kalla!”
She went limp in his arms, and Ria clapped a hand over her mouth and backed away. Pimmin and Hethyr embraced her in support, and I envied their ability to stay so detached.
I didn’t bother asking myself why I couldn’t.
Why the thought of this vampire expiring created waves of panic the likes of which I hadn’t suffered since Leonine had branded the first symbol of his disapproval into my chest. The answer didn’t matter.
It definitely wouldn’t matter if Kalla didn’t rouse herself from this stupor.
My heart beat so hard and so fast that if she didn’t open her eyes soon, it would stop.
“Lutrena bredtha me, keep fighting,” I begged. “The magic should almost be out of your system. A few more moments. Stay strong for me for a few more moments. Please.”
Cliff was still, his brown eyes fixed on Kalla’s face, fear written in every faint line of his features.
“You can’t leave me, Kal,” he whispered. “Fifty years we’ve been friends. Who’ll back me up against Thorn when she gets those wild ideas in her head? Who’ll hunt with me? This fae says you’re almost through it, so listen to him, yeah?”
Another wave of envy swam beneath my terror that Cliff had so many years’ worth of memories to hang on to. They had a history, a friendship rooted in shared experiences.
I’d had a handful of nights.
Nights of the most eye-opening, wondrous magic Kalla could bestow. Nights I would treasure to my final breath. But she deserved so many more. She had to come back.
A deep, shuddering breath wracked her body, and I stiffened, holding my own breath as I watched and waited.
For a few heartbeats, nothing else happened, and Cliff’s grip around her tightened, but when she sucked in another breath, and another, my own whooshed out of me and every muscle deflated.
My vision blurred behind a swell of tears, and I blinked them away, not wanting to lose sight of her for a moment.
Cliff bowed his head against her shoulder in a silent prayer, but I couldn’t stop staring at her face, needing her to open her eyes.
When she did, the blue was shot through with red. Her gaze landed on me, and her lips pulled back to reveal her lethal fangs. Relief too potent to contain anything like joy stole all thought of speech. My head swam, and I sucked in breaths until the black spots receded from the edges of my vision.
“Fuck that hurt,” she growled, her voice rough. I couldn’t help but laugh, a weak, shaky sound that no one would confuse with mirth.
“Yeah, it does,” I rasped. “But it worked.”
She stared at me a long while, then tilted her head back to look at Cliff. “Hey.”
“You’re a pain in my ass, you know that?” he eked out between heavy breaths, and she smiled.
“Yeah. That’s why you love me.”
He grunted and helped her sit up. It took her a few tries, but with every passing moment, her strength seemed to return, and before long she sat on her own.
“How do you feel?” I asked.
“Tired.” She flashed her fangs, then tried to cover them. “Hungry.”
Cliff clapped her on the shoulder. “We should get moving so we reach safety before the sun comes up. We’ll find you something to sink your teeth into along the way.”
My blood heated at those words, and I couldn’t tear my attention away from the hint of fang that peeked out from between Kalla’s lips.
I cleared my throat and pushed myself to my feet, then offered my hand to Kalla at the same time Cliff did. She didn’t look at her friend’s outstretched fingers before sliding her palm into mine. I helped her up and drew her closer, staring into her eyes and wishing I could plunge into them.
“You saved me,” she said.
I forced a smile. “Only fair. You saved me first.”
Although I wasn’t sure if that was true. Yes, she’d found me and healed my wounds, but in every other way, I was pretty sure she’d destroyed me.
I licked my lips, unable to look away from her, and when her gaze dropped to my mouth, her pupils dilated and my body responded in turn.
“Look at this fucking mess,” Cliff said, striding down the road and shaking me out of my distraction. He glared at the corpses. “We’ll need to make sure these fae fuckers are cleaned up.”
“We’ll report to Thorn when we get back.” Unease lined Ria’s words. “She can assign a team.”
Her tone suggested she knew she wouldn’t be on it. Instead, they’d be facing the repercussions of saving us. Guilt nudged the remains of my conscience, but I waved it away. What was done was done. They’d made their choice. The only way I could help was to not add to their problems.
Cliff pressed his lips together and nodded. “Let’s move out. More guards might show up, and I’d rather not get into another fight until I’ve had some sleep.”
He stopped by Birch and pulled the other vampire’s arm around his shoulders to help him up. Birch grimaced but didn’t complain as they started through the trees.
Cliff was right, of course, but I cursed him, the guards, and the sun for stealing my opportunity to bask in Kalla’s survival.
Gritting my teeth, I grabbed the blindfold I’d stuffed into my waistband and handed it to her. “Want me to put this back on?”
She reached for it with one hand, her other still resting on mine. “You should.” Her shoulders slumped. “But I might need you.”
I swallowed hard at her words, tucked the blindfold into my pocket with my other supplies, and allowed her to lead the way. I hoped she knew that whatever she needed, I would sacrifice everything to give it to her.
A few steps in, her legs gave out, and I caught her again before she could fall.
“Fucking legs,” she groaned.
“I’ve got you, Kalia.”
Without hesitating, I swung her into my arms and carried her after the others. That she rested her head on my shoulder without arguing gave away her exhaustion.
While we walked, I replayed our night. I couldn’t get the fight out of my mind.
The way Kalla had fought with me, using me as a weapon as much as a partner.
The graceful way she’d danced through each strike and dodge.
I’d been forced to learn how to fight, but she came to it as naturally as breathing.
That thought was swiftly followed by the memory of her screams when the crushed taphis hit her bloodstream. Her pale, sweating face and shallow breaths. After watching her suffer, I wanted nothing more than to protect her from ever being hurt again.
But that wasn’t my future. Life had proved I was made only to destroy. To bring death and ruin to those who crossed my path. Which would inevitably include Kalla if I stayed with her.
Everything was moving ahead as it should. To believe otherwise would invite worlds of regret, and those regrets would make it more likely that I would fail in my mission before I even tried.
I was so lost in my thoughts I barely registered when we left the woods towards yet another cave system.
“We can’t go too far inside because some mage wrecked it trying to set up a trap,” Ria explained, “but we can get far enough to escape the sun. Animals know to steer clear, so it’s safe enough.”
The farther we wound through the tunnel, the darker it got, but I had no time to panic before Ria lit a wall-mounted torch to shed soft light across the rocky path.
When we stopped around a sharp curve, I set Kalla down. She sagged against the wall and lowered herself to the floor with her legs stretched out in front of her. Her face was still ghostly white, while the circles under her eyes looked like swollen bruises.
I crouched in front of her. “What can I get you?”