Epilogue
Isla looked at the chests alongside Doreen who was frowning. “We can pack everything if you like. Why aren’t we bringing everything?”
The next question would surely be her asking where they were even going.
And Isla didn’t want to answer any of those questions. Her reality might feel a little softer and safer so long as the truth wasn’t loud. But time was running out. She knew this. And she hated it dearly.
“Your Grace?”
“Don’t call me that.” The words came out more sharply than she intended. Inhaling deeply, Isla ducked her head. “I’m sorry, Doreen. I don’t mean to be short with you. It’s only… Why don’t you take a break? I’ll finish this and then we can have the evening to ourselves.”
Her maid hesitated for a minute, clearly uncomfortable in the small room where Isla resided with her two sisters, and then nodded. “Very well, I’ll be in the kitchens if you need me.”
I won’t need you and I still need to find a way to make you leave. I cannot possibly bring you with me. It wouldn’t be fair. Perhaps Margaret could use a maid.
The door closed behind Isla.
Finally, she was alone. She didn’t know how much of that she would enjoy in the future. Her arms crossed her chest as she held back a shudder. The future grew dimmer every day now. She couldn’t bear the thought of what was coming next. After all she had done to avoid Lord Dunn…
“It’s too late,” she told the empty room. “What’s done is done. It is for the best.”
Already she had sent out the missive. Tomorrow morning, she would be prepared to make her arrangements with Lord Dunn.
It had taken her an hour to write the note, her hands shaking so terribly. But she couldn’t put it off. Already she dreaded every time she heard a knock at the door, fearing he was coming here to fetch her himself.
I don’t have a choice. I am doing this to protect my family. Especially Margaret. She deserves a proper match. A happy match.
On the bed before sat another folded letter. It had come yesterday for her, never opened until that morning when Lacey delivered it to her on the window seat in the library. The short message a clear threat.
The response is sent. My belongings are nearly packed. Now I simply have to be prepared to say farewell. I don’t know if I’ll be able to see them again. So much hangs in the balance… Can I do enough to protect everyone?
A lump sat in her throat. She wrapped her arms more tightly around herself for protection and security. All she could think about were those few occasions of feeling Ronan wrapping his arms around her. Never had she felt so warm, so secure.
The door behind her opened.
Wiping her face, Isla stayed back. “Not now, if you please. I’m nearly done packing, and I’d like to finish it myself.”
“It seems you are doing an awful lot of packing lately.”
She froze. Everything within her stilled as she tried to comprehend this. But it wasn’t possible. Was it? Ronan’s voice… Eyes were on the back of her head. She could feel them. Could she smell apples? Maybe she was losing her mind.
A moment was needed for her to compose herself. She clearly hadn’t scared him away. What more could she say to convince him to leave her be? How could she protect him?
Isla braced herself to face Ronan. She turned, shoulders back and chin high.
Except then she saw him. Rumpled clothing with his cravat loose around his neck. Bright eyes studying her carefully. Those fine lips in a flat line like he was waiting for her to say something.
Her breath caught. She stumbled back, hitting her heel against the bedpost. Though her hands came up to cover her face, she forced herself to drop them. She had to maintain her composure. She couldn’t fall apart.
Still, her voice shook as she said, “You shouldn’t be here.”
“Neither should you.”
“Leave. Please.” She cleared her throat. “You have no right to… to…”
Ronan was striding to her, hovering just an inch away. She craned her neck up to look at him. She blinked. “I have every right to be with my wife, especially when she thinks she’s leaving me for someone like Lord Dunn.”
She flinched. “What? What are you talking about?”
“You would deny it?”
“I…” Overwhelmed by his presence, Isla struggled to put distance between them. She couldn’t think straight. Memories flooded back to her of their time together. Of the way he smelled and smiled and touched her. The way he carried her about the dance floor. “I don’t know…”
“Isla.”
The gentle tone he used for her name, a single word that broke her open. Isla’s legs grew weak as she leaned against the bed. Her breath caught in a wobble while her eyes watered, the room spinning.
“I’m sorry,” Isla choked out in a hiccup. “I can’t. I have to. I… I never stopped caring. I didn’t mean a word I said. You must know… But I can’t. I cannot let him destroy my sister. My family.”
He had started toward her but paused. “What about me?”
“You?”
“I’m your family.”
“I…”
Ronan looked at her carefully. “Would you toss me aside so easily?”
A sob was caught in her throat. “Easily? How dare you, Ronan! None of this was easy. I didn’t want to hurt you.
I didn’t want to agree to Dunn’s request. I didn’t want to stay here and leave you and go to him.
I didn’t want any of this! I hate it. I hate him!
But I don’t have a choice. What else could I do?
What could I have done?” She could hardly speak, let alone breathe, by the end of her words.
Her begging brought her down to her knees as she wished everything could simply go away.
But there came Ronan as he scooped her into his arms. She hiccupped and fought him. He wasn’t bothered. He sat her on a closed chest and tightened his grip until she couldn’t move.
It didn’t hurt. Rather, it was secure. Warm. She closed her eyes while weeping silently. She didn’t know how she could ever leave his arms.
“You could have trusted me,” Ronan murmured. His lips were there at her ear. He rocked them slowly while he clung to her. “Perhaps I didn’t inspire that confidence. Not yet. And that is my fault, a dilemma I shall seek to rectify once I bring you home.”
“But––”
“You are not going to Dunn. You are not marrying him. You are never seeing that man again,” he said in a calm, confident tone. It reminded her of their courtship. How definitive he could be.
I want so badly to believe him. But I don’t understand. How does he know? How much does he know? Surely, he can’t mean for Margaret to marry Dunn.
Isla choked back another sob. “But what about––”
He leaned back and used a hand to bring her face up to meet his. The look of intensity in his gaze had her pausing. “I mean it, Isla. You will never be with Dunn. Not ever. You belong with me.”
How lovely that sounds.
Then he stole her breath away with a kiss that left her confused and dizzy. Something in that moment told Isla would be all right. He brushed back her hair and kissed her brow.
Isla couldn’t help it. The stress of the past couple of days, the pain over hurting him as well as herself, was too much.
The tears wouldn’t stop coming. Her eyes already hurt.
Surely her nose was so red from the way it hurt.
But she couldn’t stop. She couldn’t do anything but cling to him even as he carried her down the stairs.
“My carriage will come in the morning for her luggage and you,” she thought she heard Ronan say.
Doreen murmured a response.
“Is everything well again?” Asked Margaret. “What I told you––”
“Yes. We’ll return in a few days, I’m sure, to say hello. But I’m taking her home now.”
Home. Home. Isla didn’t want to hope. She didn’t dare believe it even as he loaded her into an unfamiliar carriage and sent them down the street. Exhaustion and the rolling wheels lulled her into an uneasy sleep eventually, and she didn’t remember anything more for a long time.
It was dark when she awoke next.
Isla winced at the puffiness of her eyes. Trying to look around, she wondered if they were swollen shut. But then she realized it was simply dark. Her curtains were open, and the night sky was a dark blue.
“My window,” she realized in wonder. She wasn’t at her mother’s house any longer, but the townhouse in London that Ronan had for them.
He must have brought me here.
Mixed feelings surged through Isla then as she felt profound relief at the familiar comfort of her home here. She adored it. But even while climbing out of the bed and taking a sip of lukewarm tea at a nearby tray, Isla worried what this could mean.
What if Dunn still expected her on the morrow? She struggled to swallow, not sure how to tell Ronan.
But he deserved the truth. He clearly knew parts. Maybe even everything. However, he couldn’t understand how far she was willing to go to protect her sister. Maybe she could convince Ronan to help her.
Finding a pair of slippers and dressing gown left for her, Isla slipped into them and then started down the hall. She wasn’t certain where she would find Ronan. She didn’t even know the hour. But one place came to mind and she decided it was worth a try.
There he was.
Ronan sat before the fire with his long legs stretched out, an elbow on his knee and a fist under his chin. He looked so handsome and moody. The firelight lit up his lovely features, flickering to create shadows in the small library.
The two of them always found each other in the library. She wondered at that for a moment before stepping inside.
“Isla.” He whipped his head around immediately.
She swallowed, bracing herself for trouble. Surely he was angry. Disappointed, even, and maybe confused. But all he did was look at her. At this angle, he was thrust into shadow. Then he stretched out a hand.
Before she could help it, her feet were obeying. She rounded a small table and the sofa to reach Ronan. He remained on one knee as he accepted her hand to pull her in closer.
A small gasp escaped her. “Ronan.”
“I love you.”
Her breathing stuttered, never expecting this. “What?”
“I spent my whole life believing that love was a toy or that love was dangerous. For years, it only brought me loss and pain. But you, my dear, you proved me wrong.”
“But I left you,” she choked out in a whisper.
“Not because you died and not because you were weak,” he pointed out gently. “You left because you loved your family more than yourself. I only… I only hope someday I can inspire such adoration.”
She put a hand on his shoulder. “You do. Of course you do, Ronan. I love you.” The words spilled out before she knew them.
But there they were. The truth. A painful truth that made her weak in the knees.
Slowly she descended to sit on his raised knee and look him in the eyes.
“Perhaps if you help me, we can make this situation better, I don’t know, but he expects me tomorrow and I––”
“No. I already told you. Dunn is finished. I can tell you the details later, but not tonight.” His free hand came up to her cheek, cradling her. “I meant what I said. You’re mine, Isla. And I’m never letting you go.”
The realization of his words finally began to sink in, making her feel like she was being born again. No more Dunn. Her future could be here. With Ronan. That bright future she had begun dreaming of not so long ago.
A shaky breath and a hard swallow were needed first. Then she asked tentatively, “You’re sure?”
“Positive.” He smirked for a moment before the curve of his lips softened.
“But I don’t want to talk about him. I want to talk about us, Isla.
I have seen your strength and your love.
And I have been a fool. The partnership between us was never going to work.
I want you. Every part of you. My world is empty without you in it, and I never want that again. ”
Her fingers dug into his shoulder as she slowly realized what he was saying. “Do you mean it? Say it. Say it again.”
Isla wondered if she needed to explain it to him. But the light in his eyes told her he understood. He slipped his hand from her cheek to her neck, pulling her in close until their lips were nearly touching.
“I love you,” he whispered.
When the tears came this time, Isla didn’t mind them so much. She wasn’t choosing between awful decisions for once. There was something in her future worth reaching for, running toward. She could have it. She could have him. All she had to choose was love.
“Please stay with me,” Ronan murmured as she closed her eyes, feeling him all around her. “Be mine forever.”
Her reply was immediate. “I will. Not out of obligation and not because of lies I told my mother.” She smiled widely until her cheeks were aching. “I will be your duchess because I choose you. Because you choose me.”
“I do. Today and forever.”
“No more rules?”
“No,” he vowed. “Just us.”
And Isla couldn’t think of anything more perfect.
The End?