Chapter 19
Katie sucked in air, tried to find a breath as she processed his words. Ian knew about the baby? How? Who?
She could deny it. She could tell him he was crazy—but he wasn’t.
“I’m early in the pregnancy. I would have told you…eventually.” Was that really true? No, she wouldn’t have told him anything, and the look on his face said he knew that.
“You’re almost convincing. You weren’t going to tell me anything, so let’s stop with the games. You may never want to see me again, you may think I’m a worthless bum, but you are not going to keep me from my child.”
Katie found the nearest chair, sank into it. Oh goodness. What a mess. What a horrible mess. She closed her eyes, rubbed her temples, and wished he would disappear.
“You might as well open your eyes because I’m still here. Not going away either.”
She blinked her eyes open, spotted him sitting in the recliner near her chair. It was the same recliner where they’d snuggled…kissed and talked…
Touched…
Shared…
Made love…
She cleared her throat, fought the queasiness inching to her throat, swirling in her belly. “Can you honestly tell me you want to be a father?”
That blue gaze burned her. “Yes, I can honestly tell you that.”
How many guys said that when they first learned they were going to be a father? Some even married the woman. All of them promised so much and delivered so little. It would be disastrous to depend on him…to care…to believe he could be different. “What do you want from me?”
He rubbed his jaw, his voice cold, determined. “I want to be a part of this baby’s life. I want to know about the doctor’s appointments, the ultrasounds, everything. The birthing classes, too.”
“You can’t be serious?” She’d planned to turn to the women in town to help her through all of this.
“Oh, but I am serious. Very.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket, glanced at her. “When’s the next doctor’s appointment? Do you have a schedule yet? I want to know about the ultrasounds as well, and anything else baby-related. Just let me know when and where.”
“Aren’t you going to Luxembourg or somewhere?
” Somewhere far away, so I can pretend you don’t exist?
The man could travel to the other end of the world, stay away for years, but there was no pretending he didn’t exist—or that she could forget him.
And if she didn’t try very hard to keep the anger fueled, she might actually forgive him, and she could not do that.
“Change of plans. I’ve got more important things going on.”
“How do you plan on doing this from California?” He was heading back, wasn’t he? He could not stay here where she would have to see him.
“Like I said, change of plans. Didn’t you know that people work remotely all the time? Max Ruhland has some projects he wants me to work on. He’s just a car ride away if we need to meet in person. No big deal.”
Katie slumped in the chair, blew out a long sigh. The man was not going away. “How many children have you been around? Do you have any idea what’s involved? The sleepless nights? The crying, the diapers? And when they’re older? You love cars and engines, but can you imagine your child driving one?”
“I think we’d have a few years to get used to the idea.”
He was serious! Katie tried again. “I’m giving you an out. You should take it.”
“Wow. Thanks for the vote of confidence.”
Disgust covered his too-handsome face. The trimmed beard highlighted his strong jaw, the new haircut landed a few inches above his shoulders. Very attractive. Too appealing. Too…
Katie cleared her throat, tried to make him understand that being a father was a lot more than simply claiming the title. “Do you have any idea how many requirements will be placed on you?” He would never want that sort of commitment. No way.
“Do you? Unless I’ve missed something, you’ve never had a child, and while you might have helped raise your sister, it’s not the same. Isn’t it all a learning process that requires commitment and a willingness to do whatever you have to for the child? Isn’t it more about that?”
Why was he talking as though he understood and was willing to accept the role of a parent? “Yes, but can you actually say this is what you want?”
His expression remained unreadable, his lips pinched, voice cold.
“Is this what I want?” He took a deep breath, let out a harsh laugh.
“No, it’s not what I want. I never imagined finding out I was going to be a father from someone other than the mother of my child.
” The left side of his jaw twitched, his voice turned colder.
“I certainly didn’t think I’d be told I didn’t want to be a parent, implying I wouldn’t be a decent one.
And what about the questionable relationship between the baby’s mother and me? That is yet to be determined.”
Yet to be determined? Katie sipped air, concentrated on what she had to say. “Exactly. You don’t want to be tied down, and that’s why I didn’t tell you.”
“Seriously?” He cursed under his breath, glared at her.
“Are you really going to play the martyr? You were trying to save me from diaper duty and spit up, and that’s why you weren’t going to tell me?
Don’t pretend you would have at some point because we both know that was never in your plans.
You wanted me to disappear, and then you found out you were pregnant…
” He dragged a hand through his hair, rubbed his temples.
“It took Jack Finnegan’s phone call to tell me what was going on.
Imagine that? I always thought the man could barely tolerate me, and yet he’s the only one who did the right thing. ”
Oh, this was not good. “Are you saying you want to be a part of this child’s life?”
“Damn straight I do. I want to know every appointment, every ultrasound…” Those blue eyes flashed with such emotion she had to look away. “Everything.”
A person could say they were going to do anything, but then they actually had to do it.
How long would Ian keep his word? Katie pushed aside the possibility that he might carry through and what that would mean, and asked the only question that mattered right now.
“So, where does this leave us? What are your plans?”
He studied her as though he could see right into her head. “Plans? Well, once you send me your appointments, I’ll sync up our calendars, and we’ll go from there.”
Sync up our calendars? Like a business meeting? “Okay.”
“I’m moving back into Max and Grace’s house, and I’ll work from there.”
“For how long?” She tried to keep her expression blank as she waited for the words that would change their lives. While she expected some sort of non-answer, she did not anticipate what he said next.
“Until…whenever. There is one more thing.”
Nausea rolled over her, and it had nothing to do with the baby and everything to do with Ian Finnegan’s presence. “What else could you possibly want?”
“Call me strange and old-fashioned, but I want the baby to have my name.”
“Oh. You want me to put your name on the baby’s birth certificate? Are you sure?”
Those blue eyes turned to steel. “I’m sure. I want to get married…as soon as possible.”
“Married? To you?” She grabbed the edges of the chair, fought the dizziness that threatened to swallow her. “Why? People don’t need to be married to coparent. What matters is loving your child and being there for him or her.”
“I understand that, but my parents won’t.
I might not want the family money, but I’ll make damn sure my child gets it.
The only way to do that is to get married.
” He pulled out his phone, scanned it. “Can you check your calendar and see when you’re available?
We can get the marriage license and talk to Mimi about performing the service. ”
“Are you crazy? I’m not going to marry you.”
“Oh, but you are. You see, if you refuse, I’ll have to make it difficult for you.
Maybe I move out of town, and we have to do a 50-50 share.
I wouldn’t like that, and I’m sure you wouldn’t either.
It’s not like we have to sleep together because obviously, you’re not interested.
We’ll share the same house, either here or you can move into Max and Grace’s.
Once the baby comes, we’ll decide what to do. ”
“Why are you doing this?”
“I know I hurt you, and I know you’re probably never going to forgive me.
I didn’t want to accept it, but I was coming to terms with it.
That all changed the minute Jack told me I was going to be a father.
If you can’t accept that, then we will have a problem because I am going to be a part of my child’s life.
” One last look before he said, “Check your schedule and get back to me. I’ll contact Mimi about the service. ”
It had been five days since Ian had last seen Katie. She’d tried to argue about the marriage, but he’d stood firm. Mimi Pendergrass would officiate, Jack and Dolly would stand in as witnesses, and the ceremony—if you could call it that—would take place at the Heart Sent.
Ian’s parents had tossed out comments over the years about what his eventual wedding would look like.
We’ll rent out an entire floor for the reception.
And what about the ceremony? You could have it at the Cathedral…
Imagine that?
I know a jeweler.
Ian’s mother would tear up, clasp her hands together. It will be magnificent.
His father would drop in one of his favorite words. Unforgettable.
Small sigh. I know a cellist. Her mother’s in the garden club.
Why not bring in the whole symphony?
Of course, the wedding would include a personal chef, orchids, doves, and a helicopter.
It didn’t matter that he hadn’t introduced them to a prospective bride, or even a girlfriend.
This was their dream and their vision, and they would not be disappointed or dissuaded.
Afterall, hadn’t Stafford Nelson Finnegan carved out a marriage and a standing in society based on appearance, bloodlines, and social standing?