CHAPTER EIGHT #2
I remembered a thousand times Falael had claimed he loved me.
He loved me, and that’s why he had to control what I ate and lecture me about my country accent, to make me better.
He loved me, so I needed to trust him and not ask him any questions about where the money was going.
He loved me, so how could I question why he draped himself all over my best friend?
Shouldn’t I be happy that they were getting along? Didn’t I trust him?
I had no regrets for the next part of my plan.
At a wave of my hand, a trio of guards stepped forward. “Falael, you’re under arrest for fraud,” the sergeant said. His fake business had stolen not only from me but also quite a few others in my village. The warrant had been active for many years.
Falael’s eyes went to me. “But … you promised you’d remove that old arrest warrant when we came here!”
“I’d only do that for a current lover, not an ex.” I swept off to my carriage, an escort hanging off each arm, ignoring the pleas behind me.
* * *
After giving Lao his pay and bonus, I was in quite a good mood. “That was a great idea,” I told Ari.
“You pulled it off stunningly. The look on his face!” Ari beamed. “Would you like me to help you unbutton your dress? It’s a bit trickier to get off than on.”
I froze. Objectively, I knew that Ari and Araceli were the same person. But Ari seemed so masculine and Araceli so feminine. I couldn’t imagine letting a man help me change, even if only partway. “I … uh …”
Ari didn’t push it. “I’ll send another maid.”
He opened the door to reveal a stern-faced Donya.
I took a step backward. “I’m sorry!” I lowered my head, then snuck a glance at her expression.
Donya massaged her forehead. “It’s fine.
A small scandal isn’t important in the scheme of things.
Honestly, I was afraid you’d show up and apologize to everyone.
Instead, you did something the Blood Duchess would do.
It was an enormous scandal, but I can’t deny she’d do exactly that if she wanted to break up with her current lover. ”
I twiddled my thumbs. “I had a very important reason. I promise.” My voice got weaker with each word, because I couldn’t possibly tell Donya the reason, not when my words might make their way back to my sister.
Donya turned to Ari. “I know I asked you to make her seem like the real duchess, and you definitely succeeded. Nice show of initiative. Just don’t get any funny ideas.”
“Funny ideas?” I asked in a high-pitched voice.
“I assume that you were only acting. If that ever changes, you’ll talk to me first.” Donya fixed Ari with a glare, gesturing at her eyes, then back at him. “Or … uh … there will be consequences. Big consequences, that is to say, um, entirely appropriate consequences for the situation.”
By the Sun God, Donya was trying to give Ari the protective-big-sister talk. She wasn’t great at it, but since I had a younger sibling myself, I recognized the signs. Ugh, this was yet more proof that Donya didn’t even see me as a woman at all.
Donya turned back to me. “I hate to ask anything more of you after the busy, stressful day you’ve had, but the delegation from the Sashan Guild of Slavers is arriving tomorrow to collect on our debt. We crowned Queen Antonia just in time.”
I groaned.
Donya bit her lip. “I’ll take care of everything. I’ll arrange it so you don’t need to talk.”
She looked so worried, how could I add to her stress? “I’ll be fine. I promise.”
As soon as Donya left, Ari asked me, “Are you and Donya close?” His tone was deliberately neutral.
“We’ve only known each other for a few days.”
“But you’re basically doing all of this for her.” His voice held a resigned note.
I flinched. “Why would you say that? Is it that obvious?”
Ari made a sound in the back of his throat as if this explained a lot. Before I had time to deny any further, he left, calling over his shoulder, “I’ll send another maid to assist you. And thanks for letting me help you get revenge on your ex. It was fun.”
After dinner, I’d been banished to my room with orders to read an etiquette book.
Only after I curled up in the armchair with my legs tucked under myself did I remember that I’d promised to write to my family while I was in the city.
In my defense, I’d been going through a lot lately.
I sprang up. My unfamiliarly long legs tangled together.
I hit the carpet with my chin. Oof. I could only be grateful the floor was so padded.
As I rubbed my bruise, I soothed myself thinking that it probably hadn’t been long enough for anyone to get worried.
I’d promised to write a letter as soon as I found the school.
If I delayed much longer, though, they would worry.
Or at least, my mother would worry. Just about everything worried her and sent her to bed for days on end.
On the other hand, my dad had forgotten my sister’s name by the time she became famous.
My little brother Benoni mattered the most to me, and I knew he’d worry the most sincerely.
He’d been deeply wounded by Calum’s death.
Our oldest brother had been more like a parent than our actual parents to both of us.
We’d lost two siblings in infancy, too, but there was no denying that Calum’s abrupt, mysterious murder had hit the hardest.
Benoni was a serious, quiet kid. Teachers tended to mistake that quietness for obedience, but he’d always been willful.
I would not put it past him to head into the city to find me if I didn’t write to him.
Benoni was too young to help, and my parents …
they would be the opposite of help. Fantasizing about them being useful made me laugh a little.
My mother’s top priority would be the low cut of my dress, and my father would try to loot the palace for anything he could sell.
I briefly wondered if I needed to warn my family about the duchess in my body, but she didn’t even know they existed, much less where they lived.
She would not find them. If I wrote the truth in a letter, there was a risk of it being intercepted.
For that matter, there was a risk of my father selling me out to the highest bidder.
Even if I only told Benoni, I couldn’t risk our parents reading his mail.
I decided it would be better to lie and pretend everything was fine.
I sat down at the writing desk in the duchess’s room and quickly scrawled out a very short letter claiming the school had kept me busy.
I also used expensive postage as an excuse for why I might not be able to write again anytime soon.
I’d try to send a few more letters, but I didn’t want anyone counting on it.
It was hard to write with larger hands than usual. My handwriting came out messy. Hopefully that would be attributed to excitement.
The Blood Duchess had a fancy seal. It took me a few tries to use it, and it came out looking like a lump, but that was better because how would I explain a noble seal on my family letter? I tried to smooth out the wax a bit.
Now, how should I mail the letter? I could wait and give it to Donya tomorrow, but I was overdue to write.
I’d already changed into a comfortable dressing gown, but it was more modest than what the duchess usually wore, so I stepped outside my door.
Were nobles supposed to have people waiting around for their orders?
I didn’t see anyone. If only I could find one person, I could order them to summon Donya or Ari.
At first I thought I’d walk until I found someone, but this palace was so big, I quickly feared I couldn’t even find my way back to the bedroom. A lot of rooms were boarded off, probably because Donya lacked the money to maintain them. I might have made a mistake.
When I heard a sound outside, I ran to a window. A man below was shoveling snow. I wrenched the window partly open. “Excuse me! Could you please—?” Oh no, I’d used please. Maybe I should start over and sound more ducal?
He looked up, screamed, and fell on his face.
Apparently I didn’t even need to try to terrorize people. I bit my tongue to stop myself from apologizing. “I’m looking for Countess Donya or my maid, Araceli.”
Stumbling to his feet, he ran.
I sat down, leaned against the wall, and tried not to sob.
Fortunately, Ari found me a few moments later. “I knew you’d gotten lost.” He held hands with Antonia, who waved at me.
“I swear, this place is more twisty than a hangman’s rope,” I grumbled.
In a loud whisper, Antonia said, “Don’t feel bad, Araceli doesn’t know the way around yet, either. We had to ask for directions twice.”
“Is it Ari or Araceli today?” I squinted, realizing the outfit wasn’t as telling as usual. From the trousers I’d assumed male, but that was a female blouse with floral embroidery.
“I’m not sure today. Maybe in between? He or she is fine. Ari is a more gender-neutral name, I suppose.”
“Ari, then,” Antonia said firmly.
“If you’re not sure, you can always call me ‘they’ or ‘Ari.’ How can I be offended when I’m not always sure myself?” Ari winked at me.
I stood up. “I’ll call you my lifesaver for rescuing me before I died of dehydration in this maze.
I wasn’t sure if the poor man would actually find you.
The duchess must have done something dreadful to him.
I should make it up to everyone the duchess has hurt.
What if I asked all past victims to come forward? ”
“You haven’t been around Arahasnor long enough to terrorize people yet,” Ari said. “This is pure reputation. I don’t recommend an open call for people to receive compensation. You’d get too many scammers, and you wouldn’t even know who was telling the truth.”
“Mean Mother hurt too many people,” Antonia said.
“That’s also true.” Ari turned back to me. “It’s not your crimes to take responsibility for, so try not to let it get to you.”