CHAPTER TWENTY #2
An embarrassed silence fell across the room as we all realized what madness our patriotism had nearly driven us to.
Ysabel sniffled. “You’re right, I know. Even so, there was no need for the Dragon Emperor to be insulting about it.
He acted like there wasn’t a single object or person in all of Arahasnor worthy of hoarding!
Where does he get off? He doesn’t know us.
He hasn’t even seen my petunias.” She rubbed at the tears forming around her eyes.
“Aargh, I wish I could stop crying. I’m not even sad, I’m angry. ”
Kaine put an arm around her. “Do you know what would make you feel better? I’ll put a hole in that stupidly long wall around Faan. I can pretend it was an accident.”
The sound of breaking glass drew our eyes to the other side of the room. A clown wearing a bright purple wig, giant shoes, a red nose, and a puffy rainbow shirt burst through the window. He licked a rusty knife and cackled, “Blood Duchess, today is the day—”
Without looking over his shoulder, Kaine punched the assassin under the chin. The clown went through the wall, leaving a body-sized hole. Judging from the distant sound of crashing, he’d also flown through the royal stables and a few other buildings.
Kaine looked over his shoulder. “What was that lightweight thing? Was the latest Avenger a fly assassin?”
On second thought, I decided maybe Kaine could take a dragon after all. It was good to have him on our side.
From the ceiling, Alzira complained, “I was about to do that. I thought it would be polite to let him finish his speech first.” Holy shit, had she been in the room this entire time?
I turned to Ari. “Was that a friend of yours? I’m sorry. We could go check if he survived the fall … though I have my doubts …”
Ari snorted. “Nah, that guy was always an asshole.”
Ysabel and I went to the kitchen together to return our dirty mugs.
Only afterward did I remember I had servants now.
I needed a chance to talk to her anyway.
I’d recently mailed another letter full of lies to Benoni and our parents, and I felt guilty contemplating even more lies in the future.
I tugged her into a cushioned nook in the hallway.
Light from the curved window made it the perfect reading spot. “Yzzy, a moment?”
“Apparently we have all the time in the world now that Faan can’t even be bothered to conquer us,” she grumbled.
“Can I tell Benoni the truth about how our older brother died? Next time I see him in person, of course. I can’t risk a letter ever since I found out Mom goes through our mail.”
To my surprise, Ysabel stiffened.
“I wouldn’t without your permission,” I reassured her, even though I really did want permission. Our youngest brother shouldn’t be the only one out of the loop. It would be unfair. “He took Calum’s death hard. I caught him talking to someone not there several times.”
“Plenty of people talk to themselves. Maybe it helps him think.”
“He was talking to Calum.”
“Oh. I’ll see about arranging for a counselor; the elves have made amazing strides in that area.” Ysabel wrapped her arms around her shoulders. “Sure, you can tell him. If you think it will help.”
“Is something wrong?” I asked.
Ysabel wouldn’t meet my gaze. “Aren’t you angry at me?”
“For threatening Ari?” I blinked. “Nah. He didn’t seem to mind. Just look at how casual he was with you today. I think he took it in the spirit it was meant. The queen came by to threaten me in return this morning. It was adorable.”
Ysabel looked at me as if I’d gone insane. “No, because I caused Calum’s death!”
I gasped. “No, you didn’t. Surely you know that, Yzzy. His death wasn’t your fault.”
“He died because of me. Isn’t that the same?” There was no real question in her voice, only a dull resignation.
“It’s not the same at all! Would you blame me if Calum had died saving my life?”
“That’s not what happened, though.” Tears formed in the corners of my sister’s eyes.
These were real tears. Like the mob, I knew when my sister fake-cried.
This was different from her mere frustration over the emperor’s letter, too.
She was trying so hard to hide it, I could tell.
I wanted so badly to hug her again, but she was leaning away from me.
Yzzy had a tendency to shut down when deeply upset.
I groped for something to say before hitting upon an idea. I didn’t like it, but I was desperate. Time to admit what I’d vowed to never tell her. I took a deep breath. “My ex-boyfriend stole all the money you gave me.”
Ysabel’s head shot up. “Huh?”
“He pretended he was investing it in a lumber company. He cheated on me with my best and only friend, then fled the country with her. That’s why I had to move back in with our parents.”
Ysabel’s hand clenched into a fist. “I’m going to murder him,” she said, her voice low and sincere. “What’s his name? What’s his last known location?”
“It’s fine. I’ve taken care of it. I’m not a kid any longer. I can handle my own enemies.”
Ysabel didn’t seem to hear me. “I’ll grind his body into powder and feed it to him! I’ll make him suffer and beg before he dies!” She trembled with fury. The look in her eyes had turned diamond hard. She wasn’t exaggerating.
“Are you mad at me?” I asked.
“You? Why would I be angry at you?” Ysabel stared at me in confusion. “I suppose I’m upset that you never told me. Why didn’t you tell me? I would have given you more money. I never would have let you be forced to live with our abusive parents.”
“Dad is rotten to the core, sure, but Mom isn’t so bad, and after the divorce, now it’s just the two of us.”
“Mom makes you suffer with words, and I’m not sure that’s all that much better.”
I thought about the direct correlation between my mother’s constant jabs and my hatred of my body. “Point taken.”
“Mom always went after you the hardest. I think it’s because you never insulted her back, and you always forgave her.
” My sister bit her lip. “I hated listening to you cry late at night. Sometimes when I was a kid, I’d make her angry on purpose so she’d go after me instead.
I used to worry a lot about what would happen to you, after I … left home.”
Left. What a nice euphemism for being sold into slavery. “You shouldn’t have worried about me, Yzzy. You had it so much worse. I wish I could have stopped them from taking you away.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Ysabel repeated. “I thought that Mom had successfully emotionally blackmailed you back into her clutches. I was going out of my mind because nothing I said could persuade you to leave. I would have thrown money at you in a heartbeat if it got you out of that house.”
“That’s why I couldn’t tell you.” I swallowed a lump in my throat.
I was perilously close to tears. “You bought every coin that you sent me with a day of your life. How could I explain that I’d lost something so precious because I fell for a smooth-talking pretty boy?
What if you had to do more healings in order to make up for the lost money?
I wouldn’t have been able to live with the guilt.
I already hated myself for being stupid enough to think the most handsome man in town would ever love a fat fuck like me. ”
All the color drained from Ysabel’s face. “Death is too good for him. I’m going to make him suffer slowly.”
“There’s no need. After I swapped with the duchess, I had him arrested for fraud.” That was the only reason I had the confidence to have this conversation with her. I could not have lived with myself if she had to save me yet again. “He was mine to handle.”
“Good for you.” Ysabel pulled me into a hug.
It felt a bit strange to have her so much smaller than my current body.
She didn’t even come up to my shoulder. I had to bend down to hug her.
Patting my back, she murmured, “Oh, Bora. I hate that anyone dared to make my precious baby sister feel unworthy.”
“Are you angry at me for losing your money?”
“Of course not.”
“Would you have hated me if I’d told you back when it happened?”
“Of course not!”
I hugged her closer. “Then why won’t you believe that I don’t blame you for what happened to Calum?”
“That’s different,” Ysabel muttered into my chest.
“Yeah, it’s different—you were held prisoner by an evil necromancer for years. I stupidly gave a hot asshole all my money. I practically had it coming.”
“You know that’s not what I meant.”
“I love you, Yzzy.” I pressed my chin over the top of her head. “Please be as kind to yourself as you are to me. Please don’t blame yourself any longer. Calum would be furious if you blamed yourself. He never let anyone push around his younger siblings, not even themselves.”
Ysabel made a choked sound like a sob. “I’ll try.”
“That’s all I ask.” I rubbed a circle onto her back.
“It’s awesome that you took down that scammer ex yourself.”
“One of the top ten moments of my life.”
“When did my baby sister get so amazing?” Ysabel’s voice finally held a trace of a smile.
“I’ve been proud of myself lately,” I said, and for once, I meant it.
I remembered that I still needed to find Ari/Araceli and confess my feelings. I felt a welling of confidence. Somehow, I knew I would find the right words to say. Whatever the obstacles of my current body and my insecurities, we would get through them together.
Unfortunately, at that point, I heard the sound of blaring horns.
Ysabel rubbed her eyes and looked out the window. “What’s going on?”
A booming, gift-enhanced voice cried, “Presenting the representative of the Conclave of Kings!”
For once, I wasn’t behind an unlocked door, and it hadn’t done me any good. Trouble had found me anyway. “Haven’t we filled our quota of crises today?” I moaned. “Is it too late to force this godawful kingdom on the Dragon Emperor?”
Ysabel paled. “I thought we’d have more time before the Conclave made a move. Can you stall them? I’ll bring Kaine and Alzira.”
The old Bora would have been too scared. The new Bora wouldn’t let her sister down. “I’ll intimidate them so badly, they’ll be shaking in their boots.”
Ysabel patted my arm. “I knew I could count on you.” She left at a run.
I’d taken off a lot of my jewelry because I found it too heavy.
Fortunately, I still had most of it stuffed into my purse.
I would have been too nervous to leave such expensive jewels lying around.
As I ran down the stairs, I crammed on rings and bracelets.
I tossed a ruby necklace over my head, getting my hair caught.
Stopping at a mirror, I straightened my curls.
I yanked down my bodice and hiked up my skirt in order to look properly like the Blood Duchess.
With my head raised high, I stepped outside.
A row of guards in silver masks lined a golden carriage.
The plumes on their helmets told me that these must be Gifted Knights.
But I refused to be intimidated. I had my own guards standing at the palace gate and guarding the wall.
The same guards who had turned tail as soon as the mob showed up, but I told myself that the Conclave’s representative didn’t know that.
I’m not Bora, a simple country girl. I’m the Blood Duchess.
Fierce and unconquerable. Terrifying and beautiful.
The lead knight bellowed, “Announcing the representative of the Conclave of Kings.”
I tossed back my hair and laughed wickedly. “What a fool, setting foot on my territory. I, the Blood Duchess, will—”
My words died in my throat. The woman who stepped out of the carriage had curly black hair, brown eyes, and a short stature supported by high heels. Those facial features had stared back at me from the mirror for my entire life.
She was me.
Or rather, she was the real Blood Duchess.